Yesterday was one week of being his bride. We started my orgasm denial on 10.19, two weeks ago. The intention at the beginning of my denial was that Iād wait for our wedding night, with the hopes of being cucked. Which I still was with that steamy FaceTime he had with another woman while he used me like a fleshlight.
But then our wedding day came and by this point in my denial with so much edging through our vacation (and many orgasms later for my partner), my headspace had been changing and getting fuzzier. My kinks start to become filthier. And maybe they always have been as filthy, but denial makes me more eager to dip into them. Being a perfect cuckquean wifey. Becoming a toy for my new owner. An anal slut for the best daddy ever.
Then that night, my body didnāt let me cum and we decided to continue my denial. With the new intention that I will work on anal training and I will not cum until I can take his cock in my ass.
My pain tolerance becomes more manageable when I am in this fuzzy state from denial. My body feels more relaxed. I donāt feel like I have as much anxiety like I usually get. I rely a little more on my daddy and love soaking up all my cuddles and attention from him. He does such a good job of adoring me and giving me all the princess treatment..
My headspace is getting more subby. More silly. Seeing more degradation and humiliation. Craving more caring from daddy as a little. Iāve not really seen myself as a little but more of a middle in the past. I think part of that stems from some earlier childhood trauma that left me feeling very unsafe to ever explore. But daddy is perfect and makes me feel safe. Iām happy to be his new wife and he tells me every day that he loves me. Even as I share these things that kind of embarrass me he gives me lots of kisses and love. My little self is still very shy and Iām not sure how quickly she will develop.
But denial makes me better. I feel safer with my husbandās support. Im so happy to be his wife. To be able to at least share and give an idea to him of some of those other personalities we always joke about me having (we say there are 17, which is so there is still lots to discover š
). Then we went out on bourbon and I dressed like a slutty bride in pink. Everything pink! My veil, bouquet, garter, stockings, corset. I had so many heads turning.
We stopped in a spot for beignets and I had covered up a bit out of respect cause I was definitely looking slutty š. But my cover opened a tiny bit and I caught a woman cover her manās eyes and pull his face away from me. Hahaha. Donāt get me wrong, Iām not a homewrecker but something about that definitely hyped me up. I loved all the attention I got through the evening. We even had a group of college boys out throwing beads with hopes of a show. And I made sure to give them one. My sweet perfect husband grabbed my bottle and bouquet so I could give them a booty shake while I got my tits out of my tight top. The flash was them seeing my shell covered pasties and the whole thing had them hollering. It was a great evening and just one thing I loved about the trip.
Iām so turned on and worked up from a fun evening out. Having men constantly staring, coming up and congratulating my husband, who is still in his suit looking sexy AF, on his new bride. Including the locals riding their scooters up to and around us telling everyone how I got the best more perfect legs. I have a thick juicy body. With this little exhibitionist high Iāve experienced and the sluttyness Iām feeling in this state of denial, I share with my daddy on top of wanting to be his anal slut, I want to be a slut. Maybe a little whored out.
Perhaps there is a couple who he really wants to get with the wife. Guys donāt typically interest me because they are dumb, but I like the idea of being used. So he says that we are swapping, and Iām just a denied fleshlight for the other guy to get off too. There was a fuck it bucket list I created a long time ago and there were some that involved multiple men and often me being tied up and left for them to use and get off to.
When I originally fantasized these kinks it was still at a time in my life I was in denial about being bisexual. I feel like my fantasies that involve a group have always been focused toward men because I hadnāt really thought there were rough or meaner women out there. That just wants to use me as a toy and treat me like a pet. But I am learning that there are these women out there, I just need to find my circle of amazing women.
While Iād be open to being a cumrag or occasional fleshlight for other guys, I donāt see myself submitting to any other man than my husband. But for women, I am a total sub for women and would love a group to be of service too. Sweetly boss me around and let me be a good girl for you too š„¹.
Itās Saturday, one week into our marriage, 13 days without an orgasm, and I am such an edged out denial slut. Iāve been stretching my ass with a bigger plug and daddy knows it. I tell him I want to cum for him so bad and I need his cock in my ass to be able to cum but I donāt think I could take him yet. He seems understanding and tells me to still come position myself in doggy in front of him and he starts to tease me by rubbing his cock on my clit. He can feel how wet I am. I am constantly wet, almost no need for lube. And he puts his cock in my pussy and cockwarms me. He starts fingering my ass to see how well Iāve been stretching and then tells me he isnāt sure what Iām talking about when I say Iām not ready because he thinks I feel ready, and he starts to put it in. I feel so proud of myself for what Iām taking so far. It feels so good to be a good girl. And then it hurts. I donāt like the feeling and I ask him if I could lay flat on my stomach. I relaxed as I snuggled into the pillow I put under my chest as I put my teeth into it to help muffle my noises and keep me from grinding my teeth. He starts to push into me again. It feels a little better. I feel a new high as my body starts to give into the feeling. He goes deeper and I donāt want it. But I want it. I want to be a good girl. I want to take the pain for him. It makes my cunt so leaky. I try to relax and ask him to stop thrusting and to just slowly press himself all the way in. And he takes my ass. He owns all of me. Daddy laid his body on me and snuggled me for a minute giving me kisses and telling me Iām such a good girl. I let my body relax with him in me and he starts to fuck me. I loved all the praise he gave me while he used my ass. I loved becoming his anal slut. He felt soo good. My body felt so good. I loved feeling filled, while my cunt was left empty. It was perfect. I tried to cum, he told me I could cum but my body didnāt let me. I donāt think I really want it. He came in my ass and loved on me by taking me out for ice cream since I was such a good girl.
I like being denied. I donāt want to cum. My orgasms take away the flighty feeling I get. An orgasm would ruin my headspace. Iād experience more anxiety and stress. When I am denied, my brain doesnāt think up bad thoughts. It thinks up hot fantasies that just make me want to be a better slut. To be a better wife and babygirl for my husband. Really a better person in general.
When I started this denial I had no plans for it to go this long. I had no idea my kinks could develop so quickly in denial. I didnāt think Iād be asking to stay denied for an unknown length of time. But here I am, asking for it.
To recap a very long post (and added some I didnāt get to share)- this denial has made me want toā¦.
-only be allowed to cum from anal
-explore my little with daddy
-be used and of service for others too (especially if it benefits daddy)
-continue orgasm denial and explore possibilities of extending length of times between them for when I am allowed to.
There are also so many other things that have happened that would just have to fall into other post cause this is soo long. But also so far in this denial I was pissed on, had him cum on my face, he had me eat his ass. Public groping. Throat fucking. Cucking through conversations. There could be more that Iām forgetting haha. I asked him to try to be mean to me and he has delivered. He is perfect.
