#cop bilbo

A Storm is Coming

The pounding rain didn’t even phase Bilbo anymore. He was already soaked to the bone as it was, even as he huddled deeper in his trenchcoat. No, it was the fact that his one single lead seemed to have disappeared in the cold October air.

“I’m sorry, Baggins.” One of the uniformed officers approached. “If there was any paint on that wall, it’s completely gone now. There’s not even drip stains on the ground. Almost like someone took a power washer to it, and used the rain to cover their tracks.”

Bilbo grit his teeth to keep from snapping out of anger. That seemed to be his luck. Just when he thought he might actually gain a foothold on freeing Erebor from gangs holding it hostage, he found himself trapped in a never-ending storm of…His eyes turned up to the gray clouds that showed no sign of clearing.

“Bilbo.” 

He turned to his partner, Theo, who had concern written across his face. Bilbo kind of wanted to deck him for it, but couldn’t even summon up the energy.

“Go home. Get some sleep. You’ve been at this for 36 hours straight.”

Bilbo heaved a large put-on sigh. Theo had a point, damn him. Bilbo just hated that after all that work…it all amounted to nothing. As if reading his mind, Theo gripped his shoulder tightly.

“We can’t win them all, Rook. It’s okay. Come back ready to save the day tomorrow.”

That did pull a small smile to his face. 

“Don’t I need to stay and help with clean up?”

“No! Get out of here!” Theo grumbled with a slap to his butt.

Bilbo tried to dance out of the way, laughing the whole time. However, the good mood, brief though it was, didn’t last past getting into his beat-up Civic. Bilbo sat there in the silent car, keys no where close to the ignition, wiping the rainwater from his face and planning out his next move. He had nothing. For the first time since coming to Erebor, he had no plan B, no ideas for how to make this better…he just felt defeated.

Numbly, he started the car and pulled out into traffic. He didn’t really have a destination in mind, but the rising visage of the mountain-shaped hotel amongst the other skyscrapers solidified just where he was going. The Lonely Mountain.

“Well aren’t you looking like a bit of a drowned rat, if’n you don’t mind me saying so.” Bofur teased as soon as he eased through the back.

“Where’s Thorin?” Bilbo asked bluntly in no mood to play games even if he did enjoy the other man’s company under normal circumstances.

“On the casino floor.” Bofur answered. “I’ll call ahead and have him meet you in your usual corner of the bar.”

Bilbo sighed in relief. “Thanks.”

***

Thorin hadn’t been expecting his little detective to be making a rainy day call, but he definitely wouldn’t say he was disappointed. Even looking soaked and miserable while nursing a beer, Thorin found himself wanting to pin those unruly curls under his hand and plunder his mouth.

“Mr. Baggins, this is certainly a surprise. You have heard of an umbrella before, right?”

Looking up at him, Thorin was able to make out the dark circles hanging low under his eyes and the haggard expression that usually came from a lack of sleep. It was a sight that sobered Thorin up immediately.

“He got away.” Bilbo spat bitterly. “Covered his trail and then let the rain do the rest.”

Thorin winced in sympathy. “I mean, I warned you that going after the Goblin King wasn’t going to be easy.”

“I know. And I…blew your favor anyways. So thanks anyways, but…you were right.”

Thorin didn’t like seeing his detective like this. Bilbo always had this fire about him and a refusal to give up. It’s what made playing with him so much fun. He couldn’t let him give-up now.

“Eh, you’ll get him eventually. You’re too smart for him.”

Bilbo perked up in surprise, and Thorin grinned seeing the warmth return to his hazel eyes. He let his hand slide across the table, playing with the fine hairs on Bilbo’s arm.

“And as for getting another favor back from me…”

He raised an eyebrow, and Bilbo slumped backwards in his seat pulling himself out of Thorin’s reach.

“I’m cold, I’m miserable, and I’m exhausted. I wouldn’t make the best bed partner right now.”

“You know what would warm you up…?”

“Thorin.” Bilbo commanded in that tone that sent a thrill straight to Thorin’s dick. 

This man had no idea what kind of power he had over him. Not even stopping to think about it, Thorin slid his card key across the table.

“Okay, I have to work for another couple of hours. How about you go up to the penthouse, take a shower, order room service, take a nap if you want it…and then if it happens, great. If not, so be it.”

Bilbo raised an eyebrow, the suspicion written clearly on his face.

“I mean, what’s the alternative? Drive half an hour to your crappy apartment, hoping the water heater hasn’t gone out on you again?”

“Okay, first off: stop spying on me. And secondly, what’s the catch here?”

“The catch is that I’m either getting laid or getting you in my debt once more. It’s a win-win for me.”

Bilbo did not seem to think favorably on this response, and Thorin thought he might end up declining after all. With a sigh, Bilbo accepted the card key, and Thorin felt his heart speed up at the gesture.

“Fine. But just so we’re clear, I’m doing this for the incredibly tender steak and not for you. Also, I really hope you don’t try to wake me up, because I have a tendency to kick people in the balls when they try.”

Thorin raised an eyebrow and Bilbo shrugged.

“Ask my cousin, Siggy, if you don’t believe me.”

“Rest assured, I won’t wake you. Or if I do I’ll make sure I’m far out of the range of your feet.”

Bilbo humphed in response, throwing back the rest of his beer before standing up. 

“In any case, regardless of your motives…thank you for this.”

Thorin returned his meekness with a bright grin. “You’re quite welcome. And you can really thank me by taking my cock in your mouth and…”

Bilbo didn’t even let him finish as he rolled his eyes and stomped his way out of the bar. Thorin sat there a moment longer, a ridiculous smile on his face as he watched the soggy detective’s backside. He almost felt downright chipper as he moved to head back out to the main floor when Balin caught him with that knowing look of his.

Thorin groaned. “Can we not today?”

“I don’t know Thorin, are you actually going to listen to me about the cop this time?”

“Nope.” Thorin remarked, already irritated.

Balin wasn’t having it as he put his hand out on Thorin’s arm. 

“A storm is coming, and you don’t need your enemies knowing the ends and outs of this relationship. For your sake…and Mr. Baggins.”

Thorin shrugged him off.

“Then I suggest you do your job, and they’ll never have to know.”