#complexsoul

or lightness.

there is critically little of it in me,

yet it still exists.

you see me as happy,

but i don’t see myself that way.

as if there is only an appearance.

i feel depth.

i live in it.

that is why i am so distant from you.

meanings matter to me.

they are everywhere,

but not everyone wants to see them.

i cannot be simpler

or lighter for your perception.

to you, this is my arrogance.

to me, it is permission to be myself.

i feel lonely here.

maybe my people are not here.

i have always lived

with this sense of being misunderstood

in people’s eyes.

and i broke myself

to fit in,

but not anymore.

i would rather die free