#commander dan

So all that said, what’s his deal? He’s a Soul Searcher commander, but not the one that our group takes orders from usually, he’s a human man named Dan and Shira doesn’t like him (she does– and she’s down bad). We don’t know his age, but hes probably around Shira’s age. I personally like him being slightly older than her, mostly thanks to his additional promotions, but they’re both near the 30 mark. (In the first kickstarter stream, Shira’s age was stated to be “27 or 28” by Mariah.)

The first thing that’s easy to talk about- and is actually highly important to immediately cover: his job and the setting that they usually interact at. The Silver Citadel- their workplace. And as with any real workplace, there are certain behaviors that are expected to be maintained when there- a code of conduct that is important. Dan is good at sticking to this workplace code of conduct, he’s polite and professional. On top of that, he outranks the others and has further expectations on him as effectively their manager. Unlike Shira (who is frankly acting incredibly unprofessional), he actually follows the code of conduct and tries to be a decent co-worker; that professional lens should thus be applied to the analysis about him since it’s the only environment we’ve seen him in so far. We have no idea how he acts outside of work, although I doubt it’s dramatically different.

As previously mentioned, he’s not the commander assigned to Shira’s team- Treva is. In the dispatch, he’s stepping in for her, as she is busy; once again affirming both his work ethic and politeness within the work environment. It additionally leads to the idea that he’s nice, and willing to go out of his way (though to what degree is unclear) to help another member of the team.

Now, this part is fully speculation, I’ll be upfront about that. I read him as a newer commander, promoted within the last year- it could even have been when Grimpkin was demoted to a processor. Treva has obviously been a commander for a long time, and is assigned to oversee Shira’s team and presumably Processor Grimpkin as well. If Dan has a team of his own, it hasn’t been said, but we also know that there’s not very many soul searchers. I doubt there’s a second team on the same schedule as them, so my guess is that he is doing something else. George also specifies that most of them probably haven't seen him around, which adds to that theory.

So with the lens that has to be applied to his interactions (and the note of what he’s like as a co-worker) covered- let’s dig into that interaction (link is timestamped to the start of the interaction and ends at 1:20:28). It’s short and to the point, professional but not unkind. He introduces himself and is immediately friendly but a little awkward with a slight stammer. It’s probably not common for a commander to interact with another ones team, which makes sense with how ordered everything else seems to be; in the scene Aurion has at Udo’s, it’s mentioned that teams are usually kept fairly consistent and separated, explaining why none of them knew Harold. He mentions that Treva’s busy in a semi-relaxed way and that he’s filling in for her, using this quote: “Hey everyone. Uh, my name is Commander Dan. Um, I um… Treva’s a little busy, so I’m going to get you guys set up on your dispatch.”

Like I said, a little awkward but friendly and relaxed. This isn’t an normal thing for him to have to do and he’s probably got things to get back to; he’s sticking to some sort of script but not robotically so. At this point, the others are being polite and greeting him back, and Shira makes her comment about how she “hates when Dan comes in” and Veyl automatically making an obvious lie about how they’re all there and on time. Dan doesn’t pay much attention to Veyl and notices that one of the people he’s talking to is Shira. At that point he looks to Aurion and Jethro and in a slightly lowered voice asks them if that’s her– using her full name. It comes off as being polite to me, but a wary and potentially worried.

At Jethro’s confirmation, Dan say “she does not like me, so I’m going to talk to you guys.” Which is… very reasonable honestly. He’s just trying to get through this interaction as fast as possible without being rude. Shira has a reputation here, she’s already shown some problem with her comment, and in the attempt to avoid an argument or confrontation of some sort, he’s just planning on ignoring her. We obviously don’t know the history between Dan and Shira yet (though I’m confident it will come up), but we see that Dan doesn’t directly seem to have a problem with her, he just knows her well enough to know that she will argue and cause a problem and he’s just trying to do his job.

Obviously Shira isn’t one to take this though, and Dan doesn’t seem surprised by that aspect. It was a situation he couldn’t win at but he at least tried. Shira asks him (though it’s more of a jab if I’m being honest) if he “doesn’t want to talk to the woman", immediately escalating things to a high point of tension because… of course she does. It’s Shira. She’s mad about her feelings (read any of my posts about her as to why I think that) and she’s also mad that he’s ignoring her. She’s going for low hanging fruit, and she’s the only woman in the group, so she makes it about that. The whole group reacts to this with shock, and Jethro starts trying to mediate things. She also claims that he does this “every single time”, solidifying the fact that they have some sort of history.

(Interestingly she does seem to have a little bit of a thing about being the only woman in the group, though we haven’t seen too much instances of sexism or a notable difference in how women are treated in the Realm versus men. My assumption is that there’s some light differences, but given both that Treva is a commander and that Shira has a team, it’s not super severe. Maybe Shira’s also just tired of the boy talk that the five boys get up to, which would be so fair. She seemed tired by the honey conversation.)

“It’s why I don’t like you, Dan. You don’t talk to women.” She doubles down on a claim that he cannot reasonably dispute. The others lack any notable experience with him, and they generally assume Shira to be honest, albeit in a blunt and somewhat mean way. It’s a shitty position to be in, Shira is calling him something pretty serious in a spot that he could come off as a massive dick in if he handles it poorly, and all the responsibility is on him to handle it.

Hilariously, Cairn says hi to Dan again. I think he’s trying to restart the conversation. A for effort, buddy.

Back to Dan though- first, he says hi back to Cairn. Then he addresses Shira and her accusations. “Hi, Shira. I… I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make it like that.” He’s rather obviously not sexist, and hes smart enough to not argue that front, he’s also taking the polite path of just apologizing to her and being the bigger person here. Given that he’s effectively her manager (and in that analogy she’d be a team lead I suppose), it’s the best course of action; and is showing once again that he’s good at his job, and a good representation of the commander rank. Shira’s sensible enough to drop this now, and just tells him (not politely, but not too rudely this time) to continue.

Dan gets back to the topic with a bit of how he was given the dispatch location, mentioning where it is (the West Woods), how far away it is (5 hours one way on foot), mentions sympathetically that they couldn’t get mounts, and tells them how much supplies they can take for the whole trip (one ration pack for the way there, one for the way back). As far as we know, outside of him being a bit unsure, this much is normal dispatch protocol- he specifically cites that the allotted resources was all approved.

At the point where the missing soul searcher group comes up, he gets a little more awkward and unsure. Given that Treva earlier had been uncomfortable talking about it (especially since Harold was in that group) and she asked that Shira tell them since it would “come off less disheartening” coming from someone closer in rank than their superior, that makes sense. Dan specifically says that “some of the soul searchers” rather than the whole garrison, but he’s obviously nervous to have this particular conversation- having more of his awkward stammers as he’s trying to find the best way to stay things. Jethro says that they got confirmation about that already, he asks just to clarify and thanks Jethro for the answer (and probably lack of attitude).

Then we get back to Shira, once again here to both be petty and disrupt. “Thanks, Dan, we knew.” At least it’s obvious why Treva is the commander they work under and not Dan. Also he quite literally just doing his job, given him a break. (Unrelated, and it’s not official art, but Lisa Jong did a few sketches of Shira and one was of that moment, and she’s got a faint blush. Shira, we know the real problem here, take a chill pill.)

Dan fully drops being professional here, seeming either annoyed and/or frustrated. “Shira, did I do something to you? Did I do something to you, Shira?” There’s more of the awkward and nervous energy coming from the repeating the same question just in reverse order- and the big thing: he doesn’t know what he did! The problem is confirmed to be entirely one-sided and something that no one knows what is. In his frustration, he mostly seems confused- he wants to know what he did to upset her; rather than being angry that she’s acting like this. Dan is assuming responsibility and once again trying to be the better person.

“Dan, that’s not a question you ask me. That’s a question you ask yourself.”

Shira, thank you for nothing. Thank you for being a problem and refusing to talk. Real talk, it makes sense that she acted like this, fully in character and great acting moment. That is how Shira acts, especially in a crowd. It is worth noting that the others (Veyl especially, who is talking to Cairn about this), are noticing how weird her behavior is here- even for her. I can’t fully catch what Veyl is saying, but what I can catch is “what’s going on? I’m wondering-” and Cairn shakes his head with a look that I can’t read. (Veyl continues to talk past what I typed, but I cannot make out what it is. If anyone else can I would love to know). Shira moves the conversation along, at any rate, not noticing her team’s behavior. She’s almost bossing Dan around more than he’s acting like the boss in this conversation.

Dan’s protesting at this, though not very seriously and giving up halfway through- Jethro once again telling him effectively to just ignore this. “I’m a commander, I’m in… oh, okay.” He gets back to showing the map, making sure they know what exit of the Chrome to take and what path. With all of that done, they leave and as they do, he says the following: “Good luck guys. Kick some butt.”

First off, I love the little bit of dorky energy in “kick some butt” that's just adorable. He could have said ass and he didn’t.

The group say bye as they’re leaving, Shira acting disinterested and annoyed.

Once they’re far enough away from him, this is when we learn the first of the big Shira revelations related to Dan: she doesn’t actually mind him, but she finds it funny to rile him up. The whole time was, at least partially and as much as the others are aware at this time just her fucking with him. Like I said earlier I’ve got plenty of posts talking about how Shira handles her feelings already, but I’ll give a tldr for some speculation on that anyway: it’s not fully an act, she is annoyed in this interaction, but it’s not directly aimed at Dan (though she’s trying to force it to be). It’s aimed at herself because she doesn’t know how to handle her feelings for him and is lashing out because of it. But then she gets uncomfortable and feels rejected when he ignores her, so she forces him to pay attention.

She’s bad at this.

Also as much as I don’t support her acting like this for a multitude of reasons, I can see why she enjoys riling him up. Even in his annoyance he doesn’t get mean and he’s trying to take accountability. He’s a genuinely nice guy who wants to get along with people, and his outburst (if you could even call it that) wasn’t threatening in anyway. Again minimal speculation and his appearance hasn’t been described past “a human fella” but I love Dan being 6’4’’ and having a pretty strong healthy athlete body (so if they were together Shira could have the baggy boyfriend hoodie experience), and with that description an angry outburst would be pretty threatening. He’s also got the social threat of being a commander compared to the rest of them, but he’s obviously not the type to use it past a vague sense of confusion at why she's acting so unprofessional.

Now properly onto the parts that are about Dan but he’s not there for. When Jethro brings him up after Shira heals him back up to full (timestamped to about the start of the interaction, ends at 51:26), I read that as him intending to join her in the fucking with Dan for amusement, though with a little less investment than Shira. And that's when we get the second Dan revelation, this time an impossible to miss change in how she acts. (Though I have to point out that Chehlsee and Jethro say “fuck you Dan” before they notice which is funny).

Shira acts downright school girl-ish and giddy, her voice softening and going higher pitch from her usual low cool tone, and flicking her hair. She’s got a bit silly smile on her face and she looks actually happy in a way that I doubt they had ever seen before. The whole party is obviously shocked by this. And of course, in the same episode we get what I consider 1 ½ level canon of the DM or PC’s player saying something in the episode about the character. “Shira likes Dan, okay? Shira fucking digs Dan. But she’s mean to Dan.”

(Canonicity levels for me are: 1- stated/shown directly in the episode, 2- stated by the creators on an official source, 3- stated by the creators on social media; with the extra half-step applied to live-play dnd in any form. I prioritize stage 1 (and 1 ½) canon, but accept anything 2 or 3 as well as long as it doesn’t contradict the 1 stage. Everything else after that is pure headcanon, which is something I do like as a whole, but I will nine times out of ten prioritize canon over headcanons unless it’s an alternative universe that is explicitly stated to be different.)

Now, when Jethro reaffirms that they’re going to tell Dan about this (timestamped for Jethro mentioning him the first time, Dan is last brought up at 1:02:15), this time in a more encouraging and wing man way, Shira gets defensive and asks why they’re bring him up. She once again brings up Dan when Harold shows up and is talking about Treva, saying that she “hated that you guys were talking about Dan earlier”. This is a pretty serious crush and she is so mad about it.

And for a bit of extra kicker, in the final live stream for the kickstarter, when Dan gets brought up by Nick (they were talking about some of the fan art that they were getting) there was a comic of the two (linking cause it’s cute and should be seen) and George’s comment is “the absolutely nothing NPC that’s now going to become insanely important to the story”, which says something very clear to me- Dan was not a part of the story initially (although as I’m sure you’ve picked up by now he’s not an “absolutely nothing NPC” to me). He’s just not essential to the plot, at least not on a conceptual level- which would explain the somewhat random inclusion of him in episode one justified by saying that Treva was busy. That effectively leads me to think that Dan exists, on a meta level, purely for the romance side of Shira’s story- it might not be a major part but I’ll talk about later why I think its a good element to have to her character.

So, where does that leave us with Dan, in terms of personality? He’s hard working and professional; and presumably any combination of smart, strong, and generally skilled enough to have become a commander. He’s sincere and kind, and at least on the professional level wants to get along with everyone without having a conflated ego; he helps his fellow commanders even though it’s not (probably) his job, and takes time away from his. He apologizes for coming off as rude, doesn’t try to defend what he did wrong or argue on the subject, and he takes everyone seriously. Additionally, he assumes responsibility without being forced to, and directly asks what he did with the likely intentions to not repeat the offense. He’s also a little awkward and dorky, stammering and having imperfect speech. Dan doesn’t have no spine, however, and does get annoyed and frustrated, and isn’t ashamed to show it- though he knows when and how to be professional. His frustration also doesn’t come in an angry outburst and isn’t directly at anyone in a hostile way- some of how he shows annoyance is muttering to himself.

All that to say, he’s got a good friendly and easy going personality with an appropriate professional side, and knows how to handle his feelings in a responsible way.

Now, why all this matters so much to me? Well, for one thing, I love characters like Dan, who are easy to get along with without being too much, but not without respect for themselves. I think it’s an enjoy type of character and someone irl I would enjoy spending my time with. That’s also a good type of character for the job he has.

Additionally, it’s an important part of Shira’s character for three reasons. First, her dynamic with Dan tells us something about her that both the main part of her story doesn’t, it’s a relationship that isn’t dependent on another player character, and it grounds her to the world.

Let’s start with the grounding element; it’s the shortest part. The core relationships a PC will have is with the other PCs, though having NPCs that are tied to them is an important thing as well. It’s a good way to make them feel like part of the world on a fundamental level, as well as giving the DM something to work with. It’s something Realm does really well, while we don’t have the full information on it, the cast has mentioned “their NPCs” which makes me think that they had a hand in at the very least creating NPCs for their characters to have connections to the world. James’ mentioned Udo and Sasha (who hasn’t appeared yet but Aurion mentioned) being his, Horace and his crew are for Jethro/Joey, the named people of the Moon Oak Grove are for both Cairn and Veyl, Chehlsee’s parents and animals friends are his, I would guess that Helio, Dan, and Lars are Shira/Mariah’s (and of course Rahm and her missing brother, though those two seemingly have major story beats associated to them and thus feels a bit different than a character like Lars or Dan). And that says at lot about Shira as a character.

Her NPCs are predominately work related, with the only exception being a troll- someone also feared on a racial level. It’s not whoever raised her and it’s not her blood family (though her missing brother is a core part of her story). It’s co-workers and the bartender of the place she frequents. That tells a notable thing about Shira- she doesn’t have much of a social life.

Then we get to scenes that Dan doesn’t get mentioned at all in, but can be alluded: the aioli scene and her conversation with Lars.

In the aioli scene (link starts at Shira’s turn, relevant section ends at 50:03), the feeling Shira gets from it a “warmth that feels like community or family, not being alone” and not only is she taken aback by it, but it’s something that she has had in glimpses with the rest of her team, but “never let herself succumb to or feel”. While Mariah specifically says the group, it’s safe to assume that she’s gotten glimpses of that with her crush on Dan as well; she’s just lashing out in particular about that relationship because it feels more intense and scary to her. Obviously the relationship to Dan isn’t her most important one, which is just a good way to handle romance as a rule and especially so in stories where it isn’t the focal point, but it’s a good way to give her a relationship that isn’t related to her fellow PCs.

If you were to go further back in the scene, her discomfort at showing her feelings is on full display, though unlike with her interaction with Dan, she doesn’t hide it with aggressive remarks this time.

At the scene with Lars at the bar (timestamped for the start of the scene, last relevant time is 58:29), first off we immediately see that she’s a bit friendlier to him than everyone else in her life. She’s asking him how his day is, she’s not totally shutting down his questions back at her relating to her mood, she jokes a little with him in a way that isn’t mean. She’s not necessarily nice to him, she kinda brushes off his whole talk about the dot art idea, but we see her not hiding how awkward and unsure she is. The bit about “it’s that kinda day” implies that they’ve talked about this stuff before, so Shira is willing to be open with Lars in a way she isn’t with other characters. She directly even cites the shared judgment as a point of bonding for them, and the dependency they have on their jobs for not being seen as “dangerous”; and she listens to him at least a little about things. Not to make the Dan essay about Lars, but he’s also a really good character, I love the heart to heart that he and Shira have about feeling like they’re representing their group and the pressure that's on them as a result- I love that she has someone like Lars in her life, and has a single relationship she’s not at full arm’s length with. But to the part that’s at least feasible to allude to about Dan- Lars listing himself, the regulars at this tavern as people she has and asking if she has people outside of here (showing legitimate concern when she struggles to say she does).

“Shira, ya gotta make friends outside of places where people get drunk” is such a funny thing to hear from a barkeep though. He’s like two steps from calling her an alcoholic, which low-key she is so he’s not wrong.

Fully getting back on topic though, when she mentions that her team is maybe friends or at least getting close to being so, Lars is ecstatic for her.

“We had a hug today, we had a group hug today. I don’t think I’ve ever done that before.” First off, holy shit that’s sad. Shira deserves more hugs and she deserves to be at the center of them. Lars saying “that’s huge for you” is just confirming to me that she actually talks to Lars and at one point probably has offhandedly mentioned having feelings for someone, though I doubt she would ever say who or go into much detail. Regardless, Lars is excited for her and very supportive, and seems to know not to push her too hard.

Shira also calls the group hug “maybe the scariest part of the day” which breaks my heart. Lars not charging her for the two drinks at that is so sweet. He loves her, he wants her to be happy. I need to know their history as well.

So finally looping back to the Dan analysis- Dan is an important relationship for Shira. She has very few to begin with, and while it’s not presently a good relationship (or even one with a mutual understanding), it’s a relationship that is much longer term than the one she has with her team and even the trainees, probably only being rivaled by her relationship with Lars. And it being romantic tells us two key things about her- the type of person she likes, and how she handles her feelings.

She doesn’t handle them well. Every relationship she has, even included with Lars, shows that. Romantic feelings only amplify her odd handling of connection.

The type of person she is attracted to is someone kind, practical, down to earth, awkward in a pretty normal way, and just a little silly. While she didn’t even noticed Aurion’s flirt with her (and I’ve got stuff to say about Aurion flirting with her, which I’ll save for an analysis on him instead), he is… rather blatantly not her type. But it’s worth comparing them here on one front: Dan assuming responsibility and asking how to fix whatever he did compared Aurion flirting in a moment where she’s more notably distressed and uncomfortable. I think if she had noticed the advance, she would have been a little pissed off; and we can assume some of her attraction to Dan is thanks to his lack of inflated ego and accountability, which would make sense given what she’s gone through.

I find it interesting that Lars and Helio share some general traits with Dan: namely being kind or friendly, and being a little silly. Lars wants to get into pointillism and has a sense of humor with the joke about his weakness to fire, and Helio writes poetry. Lars does have a bit more sway with her, telling her she needs to make friends (and not just at a tavern) and she doesn’t argue with him like she does everyone else, so we see another shared trait from Dan and Lars there with having a backbone, though Lars can more effectively use it- though Shira still doesn’t fully let him in either.

And she has, up to this point, denied herself every relationship past drunkards and a bartender; lashing out in anyway that keeps someone at enough of a distance where she feels like she can’t get hurt.

But something about the fact that these NPCs that (likely) were at least partially made by Mariah are all sweet and easy to get along with, someone that you just want to trust and hang out with is just… so telling of how lonely Shira is.

She falls for a guy that’s honest and kind, and is frankly just easy to hang out with- and despite her best efforts the feelings don’t go away, instead persisting. She falls for the guy who when is accused of being sexist, apologizes and tries to be better; the type of person who holds himself accountable and takes his job seriously. She likes someone that I struggle to ever being intentionally mean, or buys into the bias against fiends and tieflings (we also see that with how he has no qualms with Jethro, despite his extra turbulent standing as both an Eastern Orc and a parolee), which implies some level of unlearning biases that naturally exist within the Realm. He’s someone that’s incredibly generic outside of his job, a person who could go just go to get groceries without anyone batting an eye at him if he wasn’t in uniform.

Shira likes Dan.