#coderre

my brain feels halved and he has to be the glue that keeps them together, but in exchange, his voice needs to be louder than my own when i think to myself. that way, i can't hear myself. only his voice matters, even if he's really mean.

Coderre, that's what i've called him. he doesn't seem to mind it.

i wish i had someone nicer that lived in my head and talked to me. coderre's not very nice, but he's not cruel all the time. that's how troublesome it can get: one minute he will say anything to make me sink deeper into the pit of my mind and bedroom to never come out, and in the next, we're listening to a song together that makes me feel at ease.

though, it doesn't stop him from making me fidget at every single stomp and rattle of the walls, pressuring me to assume the house is going to fall down on me or someone's trying to break in and kill me.

i can't remember the last time i could hear myself think. when i assume it's a decision i'm making, it's actually Coderre choosing. i already know all his angry thoughts are his, but i do my best to not utter them into existence. they're just too evil. he wants to always do horrible things when he's mad. i think his blood boils enough to set mine alight. it hurts that i need to calm him down. my head feels like it's on fire and, without fail, i get tired and don't have the energy to do anything else.

he tells me to just go lay down, don't talk to anybody else today.

i tell him "okay."

i don't know what Coderre looks like. sometimes he's just faceless. other times he has too many faces.

Coderre is not helping, but sometimes i try my best to think of the times where he has. i can't think of them right now. i just want to go lie down and sleep.

People of Almonte —Mary Elizabeth Coddere 1940

Almonte Gazette December 1940 Under the caption “War Inspires Nurse,” the following laudatory article In reference to Miss Mary E. Coderre, daughter of Mr. M. P. Coderre of Almonte, and the late Mrs. Coderre, appeared in the Nov. 15th issue of “The Pembroke Crusader,” official organ of the Roman Catholic diocese of Pembroke: Miss Mary E. Coderre will graduate next year from the St. Joseph’s…

Coderre Grocery Store — Remembering M. P. “Mickey” Coderre

photo- almonte.com 1956 Forty two years is more than half of the allotted span of life, but that is the length of time that Mr. M. P. Coderre has been in the grocery business on Bridge Street. Now Mr. Coderre is in the process of selling his business and property although the deal is not completed. He is holding an auction sale of household furniture on Saturday, July 28 but expects to be in…

Brownstein: He hasn’t committed yet, but bet on Coderre taking another run for mayor

Article content continued For his part, Heurtel was tempted to get involved and is flattered others felt he had the right stuff for the job. “This wasn’t a simple decision,” said Heurtel, a former Quebec minister of the environment and immigration and Liberal member of the National Assembly for Viau from 2013 to 2018. “I love politics. I love getting involved, but when I got out in 2018, I really…