#co-parenting

Dating after a divorce when kids are in the mix is messy in a very real way, and pretending otherwise just makes everything hit harder. The tricky part is that the right moment usually has less to do with the calendar and more to do with whether your life feels steady enough to hold someone new.

Dating after divorce with kids can feel like a careful balancing act: one wrong move can stir up conflict at home, unsettle a child, or give an ex-spouse a reason to push back. Parents often want to move forward without rushing the kids, the routine, or the co-parenting relationship.

Dating after divorce with kids can work best when a parent moves slowly, protects the child’s routine, and keeps the other parent informed only as needed. The right timing depends on the child’s age, emotional stability, and how serious the new relationship is. A clear plan helps avoid rushed introductions, reduce stress, and keep co-parenting steady.

When is it safe to start dating again?

Dating after divorce feels safer when three things line up: the divorce is settled enough to reduce legal noise, the home routine is stable, and the new connection has lasted long enough to show it is not a rebound relationship. A useful rule is simple: if the relationship still changes every week, it is too early for family involvement.

A clear marker helps. If the kids still ask where the other parent went, or if they still expect the divorce to reverse, dating usually needs to stay private for now. If school nights, custody exchanges, and bedtime are calm for several weeks in a row, the timing may be better.

Legal vs. emotional readiness

Legal readiness means the paperwork no longer feels open-ended. Emotional readiness means the house no longer runs on crisis mode.

And sometimes the biggest mistake isn’t starting too soon—it’s believing you already know what “ready” looks like...

Father’s Day used to mean something. But when the father of your children is a douchebag, what is there to celebrate? Not all men make good fathers. Unfortunately, every time this holiday rolls around, I have a new reason to say Fuck Father’s Day. (more…)

I write every email knowing my daughter might one day be reading it. Her mother may never consider that.

"Permanent records exist in every email and text. I write mine with the awareness that our daughter might one day be the audience. I question whether her mother ever considers this."

Neal Winsomer, Calling Out the Shadows: A Father's Stand Against the Current, Chapter 19.

Available June 16, 2026.

I’m sitting here at my desk, clutching my absolute daily lifeline—a Philz Tesora with heavy cream and extra sugar, naturally—while my little white Shih Tzu, Daisy, is snoring at my feet loud enough to wake the neighbors. It’s a peaceful moment, which is rare when you’re navigating the beautiful, chaotic reality of raising humans. But as I was scrolling this morning, protecting my peace and…