#cnfssn

The best and worst thing about me is that I feel everything very deeply

I hysterically laugh at the most stupid thing and it's not really so hard to amuse me

Present me a rock and I'll carry it everywhere.

But with that, it means I also feel sadness and pain too deeply

Way too deep

I'm not sure if that makes me a snowflake, but i don't think i have much control over it. 

The closest thing to control I ever manage to do is bottling it all up and imploding..

There are days when I want to hug all my friends and shower them with kisses and adoration, no alcohol needed, just because I feel this immense sense of gratefulness for having them in my life

But there are also days when I wanna curse their entire being and flip them off for making me feel this turmoil within..

I wanna let them know that I don't fucking need them and I'm fucking sick of seeming to be the only one who values this whole shit and they can all rot in hell!

I know it's illogical

I know I'll regret it

I'm fully aware it's not true and that I'm pretty sure I don't mean it..

But at those moments it's the only thing I am able to process and feel.

I also know that there's something deeply wrong with me at the very core, which drives me to think and feel such way

I've always known and I've learned to accept that

Again, I don't have control over the thoughts and feelings,

But I can control my actions.

I shutdown and allow myself to feel all of these, but I do nothing

I let anger and hatred consume me, but in silence..

I shake and tremble and tear up with rage, but in silence.

Some say the silence is a passive-agressive manipulation

I beg to differ

Matter of fact, I think it's easier to manipulate me

They don't know how quickly the moods can shift

It's insane how the the emotions can just switch with a simple tone modulation or unmindful gestures

Give it an hour or two and it all simmers down again.

It's so damn easy that I get disgusted with myself

Soon, I'll find myself happily wagging my tail at the slightest attention and affection

So, I get more angry.. no longer at them, but towards myself

People say I'm too self-depreciating, but I don't think they understand how all these self-hatred are of mercy and gentleness.

Anger towards people converted to torment towards self.

I will always choose to let the rage pass in silence than cause irreversible damage over a stupid thing I don't think you even noticed or meant..

siya yung ideal type ko, i mean, he checks off all in my list in what i look for in a guy. he’s funny, he’s really intelligent, he’s good looking for sure, he’s also kind and ugh i just like him so much. but of coooooourse i’m pretty sure he doesn’t like me i mean, hello, ako? sino bang magkakagusto sakin? well except for that one guy when i was in elementary that had a crush on me but that’s a different story.

let’s talk about him.

so i knew him since prep? i don’t remember. i always thought of him as a loud but cute boy, we were only 6 darn it but then fast forward 10 years later, and we met again. ugh why is this kinda cliche? uhm ok

Hii Leyy!! OMG! Uhmmm, I know kahibaw nakag kinsa ko behind this post. I just wanna confess nga... Sa imoha pajod btaw ko na all out fangirl. Yes, fan kos uban taw but I never joined their fan clubs, meet ups and some of their activities. It was also my first time to make a video for someone (katong vid nako for you) I know daghan naka fans, I know busy naka soon and maybe you'll tend to forget me na but always remember that I will always be your OMG GIRL. Hahahahaha soon, we will organize fan meet ups for you and expect me to say OMG personally. This Valentines day, I just want you to enjoy and be true to your feelings. I just want you to be happy, of course. So, spread the love and you have my all out support. I loveeee youuuuuu bitaw, seryoso ni. hahahaha fan here.

Hala hahaha wala na diay kas kpub?? agooyyy how can I give the chocolates  now T______________T lol

TBH wala ko ni expect na mo like ka sa akong Instagram pic nimo😂 I fangirled to my sister before church and that made my day btw youngest fangirl probably hahahaha I'm 12😋

"Hi Leo!! 😍 Nindot kaayo imong chillax voice na  kailagan ko mo stay up para maminaw nimo. Shete na ang time difference! ‪#‎teamnosleep‬ ingatz always!! 💕"

" Leo ingon sa akong mama  ba  parehas  daw mo og  nawong ni ryan bang ... Ayaw  kabalaka  di jud na tinuod,kay imong kalook alike kay si LEOnardo di Caprio ....  Tama ba?Hihihi"