#cluster feeds

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So here we are again. In a state of constant half undress, nonchalantly flashing my boobs at the postman and letting my toddler wear my breast pad as a jaunty little hat. I'll be honest I had forgotten just how much new borns feed. Feed, and then sleep on you for hours so that accomplishing tasks such as brushing your teeth and making and consuming an entire cup of tea without having to microwave it become huge achievements. The plus side? So much easier this time. The first time my tiny baby had a tiny mouth to match and no matter what I tried I could not get him to latch on in a way that didn't shred my nipples. I tried every damn feeding position and constant adjustments, but i swear, huge boobs + tiddly mouth = Oh sweet Jesus, pass me an ice pack already. It was painful for 8 weeks until I finally gave in and used nipple shields to allow myself to heal, (totally recommend this by the way. I know they're supposed to be all confusing and a big no no, blahblahblah, but honestly, they saved my relationship with breast feeding and stopped me from stabbing myself in the eye every time feeding time rolled around). This time? Baby #2 is still tiny, but he has his Mama's big ol' mouth, and two weeks in and those toe curling first latches have all but gone. I'm also trying to subdue my inner control freak and be less of a clock watcher than I was. With the mancub I would diligently note down the time and length of feeds, which side, whether it was a full moon etc etc. All so i could conclude that THERE IS NO PATTERN, THIS KID DOES WHATEVER THE HELL HE LIKES. This time I'm just going with it. He cries and roots around? He gets a feed and I get to sit and watch an episode of Weeds and eat chocolate. Win win. The only thing that is currently a struggle is that boy, does this boy have wind. I'm talking man farts you guys. Which means that at night he has a good long feed, burps, snuggles in and falls asleep, only to be woken up by his own flatulence minutes later. Ugh. Either that or it all seems to get stuck, resulting in a painful (for all concerned) screamathon at 4am while he gets all his toots out. I know this is all par for the course and that once his digestive system toughens up we'll be golden, but i'm not going to lie, it kind of sucks to be loosing sleep because your kid has to fart a lot. All things considered, I'm thrilled that breastfeeding 2.0 seems to be going so smoothly. He has regained his birth weight and we have been discharged by the midwife, I have a good supply and I am managing to sleep in two hour increments for a decent chunk of the night. Sleep deprivation and exhausting cluster feeds aside, I am just soaking up this glorious little newborn, smelling his fuzzy little head and remembering that this too shall pass, and hopefully not too quickly.