or “a summary of The Turning of the Tide based on the excerpts I’ve read”

***

Rose was pregonate and the Doctor wasn’t sure how to feel about That.

“Its just a wee little tiem babby don’t trip your balls over it,” said Rose in an irritation. “By the way your not the doctor now, your Corin I decided. Woof woof, like a dog”

“Yes that checks out” the DCorin nodded solemnly. “Eat your spinach”

Then there was Clark, the worm. He was cute.

“Look how cute I am..” Said Clark the worm. “Be my daddy!”

Roes rolled her eyes and huffed a huff of mad. “It can’t be your daddy it is already my baby daddy. Now be a deer and go bugger off” she said patting its head. Clark had a confusion since he was given to understand that humans often choose genders and or porgnouns and maybe Rose made a Joke calling Corwin “it” but it was a bad joke and Clark didn’t like It. So he squiggled away worm-stylez.

Clorwin pouted “There is a electricity here and it is very dangerous Rose, Do Not Follow Me Into The Electricity” but Rose came anyway and there was a lifeboat (?) and Cloerwin was angry at her “I have to portect you and the ginger babby chiswick lizard!” said Cloernwin “because I am a human man and this is how human men do. What’s a sonic screwdriver, again? Donna!” he fell to the ground and hit it with his fists

“Eww” Rose wrinkled her nose and takes all the technologies away from Cloernwind so he didn’t hurt himself like a big dumb baby “At least you smell like Doctor”

Sighing,, Cloernwindow gazed sadly up at the Stars. “Rose remember when you didn’t hate me?” He asked but Rose was too busy glaring glarefully at him

But then the tides turned and babby was coming so Rose was all like grabbing Cloerninwindow’s face and being like “BE BETTER GODDAMMIT” and now it was time for the Real Adventure which was Rose pooping on the table during delivery and other assorted heteronormative bliss. The end