#clancy x reader

You were sitting in Clancy’s lap, wearing nothing but an oversized shirt, squirming impatiently as his eyes traced your body. He was wearing nothing but his mask. You were desperately needy for this man tonight, just wanting him to fuck you and put a load in you. But Clancy seemed to have another idea in mind; you could tell, he wasn’t hard to read. You felt his hands sliding up your thighs, up to your hips, squeezing the soft skin there.

“So beautiful, my boy,” He cooed.

“Clancy…please, please I need you,” You whispered back, squirming again.

“I know, my boy, I know.” Clancy kept eye contact with you, sliding a hand down to your folds. You gasped as he slid his fingers up, suddenly circling your t-dick. Your hips bucked up immediately, a small moan slipping out from your lips as he kept up circular motions.

“F-fuck, Clancy..please,” You whined out. He took the hint, moving his fingers down, sliding them inside of you. You whined again as he then crooked them inside of you, easily finding that spot that made you shake and whine for him. He worked his fingers in and out of you, keeping his eyes locked on yours as you let out small moans. You jumped, not realising he had moved his other hand back to your t-dick.

“Fuck, so wet for me, so adorable,” Clancy murmured, focusing on fingering you and circling your clit. You could do nothing but whine and whimper, your thighs beginning to shake. You weren't far off from cumming, and Clancy soon saw the signs as well, because he eventually pulled his hands away.

“I have something new in mind for us to try. Are you down?”

“Y-yeah, sure, Clance,” You panted, still shaking from the pleasure. He let out a quiet huff of a laugh, loving how he could break you down so easily. Clancy reached for a box nearby, one you have been questioning the contents of since he set it there earlier. He opened it, revealing a vibrator, one meant for g-spot stimulation.

“I want to put this in you, and make you ride my thigh, yeah?” He mused. You shyly nodded eagerly.

“Use your words, my boy.”

“Yes Clancy, I’d love that,” You whispered. Clancy nodded in approval.

“Good boy. Now, c'mere..” He took the vibrator out, setting the box back down. He had you lift your hips up a little bit, and he rubbed it against your entrance before slowly pushing it in. You gasped as it sat snug inside of you, and against your folds. Clancy then readjusted you slightly so you were straddling one of his thighs.

“You’ll be a good boy for me, yeah?” Clancy rumbled as he turned on the vibrator to its first, lowest setting. You whimpered a little, nodding at Clancy’s words. You quickly grabbed onto Clancy’s hips, rolling your hips forward a little. You let out a gasp, feeling the vibrator brush against your g-spot.

“Oh, oh fuck,” You moaned, continuing to roll your hips. The outer part of the vibrator also brushed against your t-dick, adding onto the pleasure you were feeling. And fuck, did this feel amazing. You felt Clancy’s hand under your chin, guiding you to look up at him. You could only see his eyes with his mask on, but fuck was it a turn-on.

“Feels good?” He mused.

“Y-yes..yes, fuck, Clancy,” You whimpered. “S-so good, so good…” You rocked your hips forward faster, panting and whining. You knew you weren’t going to last long like this. You noticed Clancy slide his hand back down, and that’s when he ticked the vibrator up to its next highest level of vibration. You whined louder, the higher vibration feeling even better against your g-spot and your t-dick. It was all so much at once.

“C-Clancy…Clancy, fuck, I’m so close,” You moaned out, desperately rocking your hips faster.

“Go on, be a good boy and cum for me.” That was all it took to bring you over the edge. Your movements soon stopped, and your entire body trembled as you came, loudly moaning Clancy’s name. Clancy watched, feeling so painfully hard watching this.

“Fuck, you’re absolutely beautiful like this,” Clancy whispered. His hands were massaging your hips, and he slid them down, squeezing your thighs.

“Think you can handle more, my sweet boy?” Clancy slid one hand down to the vibrator, ticking it up to the highest vibration setting. You gasped, still feeling sensitive from cumming, so this feeling was bordering on overstimulation.

“F-fuck, mmmh…” You whined, rolling your hips forward a little. This made you gasp, your sensitivity combined with the strong vibration was overwhelming, but in the best way. You continued to hump Clancy’s thigh like a dog, letting out louder moans at the feeling.

“Look at you,” Clancy grumbled, “So desperate to cum again, hm? Does this feel good, riding my thigh?”

“Yes, yes Clancy,” You moaned, meeting his eyes again. You shook each time you grinded down on his thigh, feeling so overwhelmed with pleasure. You fell forward onto him, breathing in his neck as you approached your second orgasm.

“Mmm, hold on my boy,” Clancy groaned, grabbing your hips and forcing you to stop your movements. You whined, feeling frustrated, until you realized what he was doing. Clancy slipped the vibrator out of you, haphazardly placing it somewhere. He lifted you up, slipping himself inside of you, making you whine again. Clancy gripped your thighs, thrusting up into you at a harsh pace.

“Just..wanna cum together…wanna put a load in you…you’d like that, yeah?”

“Y-yes, please Clancy, need..need your cum,” You moaned, feeling him abuse your g-spot over and over again. His hips snapped up into you roughly, both of you quickly approaching your orgasms. It wasn't long until he was pulling you down onto him, cumming inside of you as you clenched around him, both of you moaning out in tandem. You shook in his lap, resting your head in the crook of his neck as you both came down from the high. Clancy slid a hand under your shirt and up your back, gently rubbing circles.

“You okay, my sweet boy?”

“Yeah…more than,” You mumbled. You heard him chuckle, before he gently lifted you off his lap, laying you down. You watched through half-lidded eyes as he shakily stood up, grabbing a rag, before returning to clean you up and help you re-dress. He cleaned himself up afterwards, before dressing and laying down beside you, gently rubbing your tummy.

“I love you, my beautiful boy,” He murmured.

You were laying in bed, still awake, with Clancy spooning you from behind. You couldn't sleep, despite his comforting presence behind you. It was another awful night of dealing with your usual flare-ups; headache, churning stomach, aching limbs. You felt tired, but nothing would let you fall asleep. You could tell Clancy was sleeping, and despite his reassurances you always felt bad about waking him up for things. But tonight, you knew you couldn't keep going on like this. Tears were already rolling down the side of your face, making the pillow below you uncomfortably damp.

“Clancy..?” You started, hoping that he'd hear you. When a few, silent seconds passed, you repeated his name louder.

“Mmm?” He groaned, stirring slightly.

“...Don't feel good,” You mumbled. You felt him shift, probably up on one elbow.

“What's the matter, my boy?” One of Clancy's hands was still snaked around your waist and to your tummy, and you felt him rub and squeeze slightly.

“Just…I dunno. Flare-up I think.” Clancy hummed, leaning down and planting gentle kisses to your neck, then up to your cheek.

“What do you think you need, hun?” You were silent for a few seconds, trying to think of what could help.

“I dunno…I just need you, I think.”

“In what way, sweet boy?” You suddenly became hyper aware of Clancy's hand on your tummy, and you suddenly felt sparks down there. You went silent, but glanced over your shoulder at Clancy, nervously seeking his eyes in the darkness of your room. Clancy leaned back down, meeting his lips with yours in a gentle kiss, before pulling back.

“Just want a quickie? Want me to make you feel good?”

“Please,” You whispered.

“I'll take care of you, my sweet boy…just relax.” Clancy moved his lips down to your neck, leaving open-mouthed kisses all over as he massaged your tummy again. You sighed, content, already feeling good. Clancy moved a hand down to your waistband, seeking permission to take your pants and boxers off. You allowed him, so he slipped them down and off of your legs, tossing them on the floor nearby. He returned to your neck, and his hand snaked down between your thighs, gently thumbing your t-dick. A small whimper left your mouth, and you rolled your hips forward a little. Clancy stopped after a bit, moving to discard his own pants and boxers. He adjusted himself behind you, pulling you up against him. Finding your already wet entrance, he slowly pushed himself inside of you. He wrapped his arms around you from behind, pulling you close.

“You feel so good for me, as always,” Clancy whispered, planting more kisses on your neck. He started slowly rolling his hips, earning small whimpers from you. He squeezed your hips and then your tummy with one hand, rubbing small circles.

“Clancy..” You whimpered, moving one arm behind you and squeezing his bicep.

“Feeling good?” He mused, as he continued rolling his hips into you, trying to push deeper inside to hit your g-spot.

“Y-yeah…much better,” You whimpered. This felt amazing, all your pain forgotten, instead replaced with nothing but thoughts of Clancy. Clancy behind you, inside of you, his soft lips on your neck, his hands caressing your sore body. One snaked back down in between your thighs to your t-dick, rubbing circles, making you whine slightly louder.

“Atta boy, that's it,” Clancy whispered. “I've got you, I'll take care of you. Make you feel so much better…” Clancy continued slowly rolling his hips, but making sure to thrust as deep as he could. Your moans got a little louder as his cock brushed against your g-spot repeatedly. Clancy focused on that spot, his thrusts gaining slight speed. You could feel yourself trembling slightly, realizing you were beginning to get close to cumming.

“C-Clancy, I'm..I-I'm close,” You moaned softly.

“Go on my boy, cum for me okay? Won't it feel so good?”

“Yes…w-want you to cum with me, please Clancy.”

“”Mmh…I will…inside, too, give you a nice load,” He groaned in response. You whimpered and moaned repeatedly as that feeling grew stronger and stronger. Clancy chased his own orgasm, almost desperately thrusting into you, his fingers digging into the soft skin of your hips. He eventually pressed his hips as close to you as he could, letting out a moan as he filled you with warm cum. You whined his name, clenching around him and trembling as you came around his cock. He gently kissed your cheek, rubbing your tummy.

“T-that's it…good boy…that's it,” He cooed. You let out a last whimper, breathing hard. The both of you laid there for a few moments, with Clancy planting kisses all over your face and neck as he rubbed your tummy. He eventually slipped out from inside you, getting up out of bed. He returned from your shared bathroom not long after, spreading your thighs to clean you up as best he could, before redressing you. He cleaned himself up, before returning to bed behind you. You rolled over, resting your head on his chest as he wrapped his arms around you.

“How're you feeling?”

Hiding the scars from his past, as they drown in the black ichor so no one would see them unless they truly looked across his body. His pain that he refused to let the bandito’s see. Only Torch knew of them.. spoke of them in soft whispered conversation.. sharing his own story and blemished skin to Clancy- a dance they did together without becoming to entangled with one another. It didn’t matter, they were tied together by the string of fate that they could never avoid, torch knew this time and time again but he always lost the connection after each failed mission.

He was losing hope but something about this one- was different.. one of the many others that have been there since the beginning of their story.. they sat by the small fire by their tent with a glazed over expression. The soft crackle of the logs in the fire were a simple but calming sound to them, their eyes drifted up as they felt eyes on them. Furrowed brow as they noticed he was watching, anxiety flooded their chest as they moved to continue working on the simple sketch of their comrades they had lost.. they had slowly started to forget their faces and they couldn’t handle letting anyone else get forgoteen.

The sun slowly setting made the cold surround them quickly as they wrapped themself up with their jacket and scarf, but as they fell back into their process with the drawing.. their eyes flickered where they had once felt eyes and saw the spot was empty.

A part of them seemed… saddened by the sight of neither man, as they stood up to put their fire out they collided with a solid chest of muscle and awkwardly dropped their sketch book. Flipping to a page with simple sketches of Clancy and the other side being of Torch, quickly they went o apologize to who it was and their body froze in place. The cold nipping at their nose and ears casing a tinge of a reddish pink, they had run straight into Torch and they realized that his eyes were cast down at the sketchbook.

Their eyes widened as they quickly picked it up and held it close to their chest and realized Clancy stood just a few inches behind Torch, that made embarrassment flood across their body as they moved to stand a bit straighter as they looked between the two.

Silence encumbered the small group as Torch glanced to their tent and gestured, they wanted to come into their tent? Oh salho- they weren’t sure if it was clean…they awkwardly moved to push it open for the two to enter but Clancy took their place with a soft tilt of his head. They rushed in to look around just seeing the flood of sketched across their desk they truly had no time to hide but the art supplies was the last of their worry as they quickly tidied up their bed and turned to stand straight and watch them as the two men walked inside.

The bite of cold was gone and they relaxed, but before they could process Clancy was stood in front of them with a hand to slowly tilted their chin up to meet his gaze as Torch stood behind him with a blank expression.

They felt his calloused fingers tilt their head up making them blink a few times in confusion, but they didn’t pull away. The feeling of physical touch was so little nowadays and this was simple but enough to feel that fluttering in their chest. The cold touch made a chill run down their spine, they looked into his brown eyes that seemed to glow with a golden color from the lanterns in their tent.

They attempted to speak but felt words fail as his head shifted to the left “You seem, nervous.” He stated quite bluntly, with a strange look in his eyes, one they haven’t had a chance to see. Use to his head strong attitude and reckless abandon in all situations. This looked almost.. entirely different, a softness that seemed to shift to a more darkened expression.

“Nervous? Well I will admit, This situation is quite- unlike anything. I assume I caused an issue- do I need to confess to something you know of?”

That made Clancy squint a bit as he took a step closer as they could feel his hot breath flood over their face “did you need me- to approach you to Come to confess your sins?”

They ignored the way their heart was racing and the small perspiration across their forehead and the beat that fell down their neck. “I don’t know how much time you got?” They asked softly truly trying to match this strange behavior

“More than you may think.” He carefully pulled his hand away as he stepped to their desk littered in sketches. They missed the feeling of his hand but before they could react they stepped forward to try and block his path “It’s more envy then-“

As they spoke Torch moved as well as his eyes met Clancy and they flickered over the scattering of sketches of the both of them on the desk. Clancy moved to carefully settle a hand on their waist as he leaned forward to pick up a piece of paper with a beautiful shaded piece of him- looked like to was from of one of the many meetings he called for.

“Envy you say?” Clancy speaks softly as he lets the paper rest between his thumb and forefinger “Envy doesn’t rely on.. making drawings of the one you feel envious of. It seems it me to be more of- an infatuation.”

His hand on their waist as he stepped into their personal space almost being chest to chest, that warmth they felt in their chest flooded to their face. Torch moved slowly to stand behind them as his other hand rested on their other free hip, the tension in the tent seemed to flood them all. They felt their mouth run dry, trying to think of a- retort or even something to make them feel in control.

“I draw the ones I fear of losing- as well as draw them so I never forget what they looked like. I find myself losing the connection I had for many-“ Torch moved to press against their backside “Nobody is forgotten, just lost to time and cause. We don’t want you carrying that burden, they may be gone but know they will be with us always.”

Clancy hums “Not envy, but fear of losing the connection you’ve made. Why lie when you simply needed to tell the truth? Or is there something else you’d like to express to us?” His hand that held the drawing letting it float down to the desk “I expect you to be truthful, I feel your eyes on the two of us. You aren’t entirely.. good at hiding your own expression when you think no one is watching.”

Torch smiled softly at Clancy “is this… where you’re honest or do we need to pull it from you another way?”

They were so lost in the moment their mouth had fallen open as Clancy carefully pressed a thumb to their bottom lip and let it press into their soft flesh. “Show us exactly what your looks truly mean.” He whispered in a soft hushed tone, the dark look in his eyes seeming to take over.

Their mouth carefully shifted as they leaned forward taking his thumb into their mouth, the warmth of their mouth a stark contrast to the coldness of his fingers. Their tongue pressing into the pad of his thumb and taking the flavor of some form of ink and salt from his skin. Flooding their mouth.

Clancy felt a soft hitch in his throat at the way they seemed to fall into line on instinct. No need to instruct them, they knew exactly what they wanted from him.. torch moved to watch them as he pressed his lips to the side of their neck with a small hum “Seems we both were right.” He muttered, his eyes flicking to Clancy.

@the-great-raccooni

@who-stole-my-car-radio

(Y/N)’s body rolled to the floor, a tangled intangible mess of limbs and blankets entrapping her to the ground as her heart pounded out her mouth. Bile rose in her throat, tearing acid in her mouth. Nails clawed out the mass of nightmares. She was choking. Dying. She had to be. Her lungs didn’t work, clogged. Smog, smoke as thick as tree bark wrapped the column of her neck until she was gasping. Fingers raking the floor until she could drag herself away and into the stump behind her. It was too dark, too alone. 

She couldn’t be back here. Not again. 

As quick as she was engulfed in the darkness, a quiet “flick-whoosh” sound permeated the air, lighting up the room in soft firelight, her eyes finally settling on the oil lamp across the room. The tent. Their tent. She was in their tent. Torchbearer’s tent.

The same Torchbearer who was settling onto one knee at the end of her legs, hands up where she could see them. That sight alone made the knot in her chest ease, breathing coming all that easier even as she wheezed out. No words came out, even as her lips moved to form them. 

“I know,” Torchbearer whispered, quiet and gentle, barely breaching the air around them. Slowly, as if approaching a wounded animal, he extended his hands, offering them out to her, palms up. Wordlessly, (Y/N) gripped onto them, so tightly Torchbearer had to fight off a wince. That would only send her spiraling back. Back to that monstrous city. Back to that room. 

Instead, he took a deep breath in, until his lungs burned with the stretch, keeping her eye. (Y/N)’s head bobbled into a half-formed nod, and her chest rose shakily. A desperate, earnest attempt at following his lead. Then back out, in unison. Her fingers moved effortlessly to interlock with his, and he squeezed, hard, firm and grounding.

This was a game they’d played many nights before, and yet (Y/N) still found herself amazed at how effortlessly he dealt with it. Dealt with her. 

“Can I come closer?” Torchbearer asked softly. (Y/N)’s eyes finally focused on him, seeing him now. Really seeing him. His curls were disheveled, poking out in all directions like a bear after hibernation. Eyes crusted with barely contained sleep, slightly glazed as if he hadn’t properly woken up yet. Chest still bare, goosebumps risen on his tan skin, ripped from the cozy confines of their sleeping nest to the frigid winter air. Movements slightly sloggy and slow outside of their diligent focus on her. Like the act of her soothing was something he could do in his sleep. 

(Y/N) let out a quiet affirmation and without another second, his fingers unravelled from her fingers to wrap both his arms around her waist and tug her forward, all encompassing and devastating. Her arms moved to wrap around his neck on instinct but she found herself frozen. No matter how much she revelled in the affection, in his warmth, in the quiet reverence in the reassurances he muttered into the curve of her throat. 

Her brain couldn’t focus on any of his gentle affection when only one thought could circulate the rotation of her brain.

She was never going to end up back in that place. Even if that meant her death.

“You shouldn’t avoid her so much, y'know. She won’t bite,” Torchbearer teased lightly, throwing an apple in Clancy’s direction, which he caught with swift hands. Despite the mocking of his voice, Clancy could dissect the layer of tender care beneath it. 

Torchbearer often cared too much by Clancy’s standard. But he couldn't say it wasn’t nice to have someone in his corner for once. Even if it meant pushing him every five seconds. He only wanted what was best for him - he knew that. Even still, it sparked something personally raw in the back of his throat and he had to fight back a biting comment. 

He hid his barely contained irritation behind a small shrug, watching the girl in question from their place in the tent’s entry. It was pouring it down just beyond the shelter they’d taken, mostly to protect the maps they had been scouring over seconds before nature’s downfall. And yet, outside (Y/N) stayed, diligent in her duty on guard. Some of the children were playing, splashing and flicking mud across camp, the air filled with playful screaming and squealing, adding to the symphony of the pattering rain. A droplet would splatter onto her overcoat every so often, and the men could make out her laughter from the curve in her face, eyes squinted. 

“It’s raining,” Clancy replied simply, and Torchbearer scoffed, raising an eyebrow in his direction in such a way that Clancy couldn’t help but roll his eyes. It was a poor excuse and they both knew it.

“You ran through freezing cold water in Trench’s valley to get away from Nico,” He responded with a deadpan expression. Jesus, Clancy felt like he was getting scolded by his father. 

Clancy gave him an incredulous look, that irritation burning his throat again, “I think the circumstances were a little different, Torch.”

“Still,” Torchbearer shrugged, “The rain won’t kill you. And she looks like she could use the company.”

A small smirk pulled at Clancy’s lips and he turned to Torchbearer with a self- satisfied look on his face. Unconsciously, Torchbearer frowned, aware of the bullshit that normally came with that look, “I think we both know who’s company she’d prefer.” 

It was like a switch flipped in him. The almighty leader, collected, calm and chill turned into a stuttering teenage boy who’d never seen a woman a day in his life. His eyes widened, his entire body tensed and anxious unease rested on his shoulders like a shawl. “I- I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Clancy rolled his eyes, giving Torchbearer a look from the corner of his eye, the smirk never wavering even as Clancy pulled his hood over his head, “Uh-huh.”

Torchbearer scowled, leaning on the entry post as Clancy made his way out into the torrential weather, something smug and self-satisfied settling in his chest as the escapee moved to join his fellow leader despite his protest. 

A small smile formed on Torchbearer’s face as the two began to chat. (Y/N)’s expression was soft and understanding, but he could spot the turmoil buried underneath it. Clancy was guarded as ever, but there was a yearning there. Like he wanted to spill over the edges but couldn’t let himself. It was an expression he recognised well.

It was one (Y/N) used to wear every waking moment. 

(Y/N)’s eyes glided from the forest line to the approaching figure, rain droplets clinging to her eyelashes as she blinked, making her face appear tear stained despite the peace that lingered. She could barely make out his squelching footsteps over the echoing of children's squeals and giggles, but she could just identify the calculated timidness of Clancy’s walk. 

“You come to play too?” (Y/N) called over the heavy rainfall, a cocky smile on her face as Clancy fell in line beside her, eyes scanning the treeline.

Clancy rolled his eyes, a somewhat awkward smile on his face as he raised an eyebrow, fingers locked on his hood to keep it from falling. His head got a lot colder now that it was shaven. “Yeah, totally. Came to meet my friends Zach and Judy.”

The kids in question perked up, mischievous grins meeting each other, and suddenly something hit Clancy's back with a heavy, wet “thwack”.

Clancy’s shoulders tensed, knitted tightly, cheeks burning as (Y/N)’s laugh broke through the air. Raw and natural, without the pretences of leadership. Despite the discomfort of frozen, wet mud dripping down his back, he couldn’t resist a fond smile at the purity of her joy. She made it easy for him to talk to her, despite how he felt.

The apple in his hand extended to her like a fig leaf through a storm.

She took it silently, content in the quiet. Reading the moment. The last breath before a rattle. With a sigh weighing heavy on his chest, he turned to her, ignoring the evil cackles of the two children running away to focus on her grinning face, “I don’t mean to avoid you.”

(Y/N)’s eyes fell to him, eyebrows raised and eyes widened marginally, the smile on her face settling to a thin line. He never said what she thought he was going to. Thrown through a loop every time. The apple twisted in her hand, once, twice, three times before her mouth opened. Just looking at Clancy for too long forced a knot of anxiety to twist her stomach, hands trembling, words stumbling over each other. 

“I know,” She replied simply, flicking her eyes, now fixed on the darkness before her. 

Clancy's finger rolled on his pants, slipping and sliding against the peeling tape wrapped around his thigh. His eyes turned to the sky, flinching as the tears hit his face. Still, it was better to feel something, anything, than the blankness lingering in his chest. “You just…”

“Remind you of everything you ran away from,” Clancy’s shoulders loosened at her reply, his eyes snapping to her side profile at her words. 

The silence between that followed was thick and heavy. Enough for him to choke if he breathed too deep. 

“Yeah,” He found himself saying. He’d prepared a whole explanation, a spiel to justify his decreasing inability to function alongside her. And she’d just…

Maybe he wasn’t as alone as he’d tricked himself into believing he was. 

(Y/N) let out a heavy sigh, finally turning to her companion. Clancy almost stepped back at the compassion in her eyes, gentle and forgiving. But haunted just the same. He made it easy to forget that she’d faced the same world he had. 

“You’re the first person to make it out of there in seven years,” (Y/N) began, letting out a heavy breath in the gap that formed “I thought I’d be excited. Especially when I saw it was you on the other end of the call.”

She kicked a rock into the abyss of forest before them. A distant thud bristled in the trees, barely audible over the pounding of rain, but it gave a simple reprieve from the stifling conversation Clancy wanted desperately to run from.

“Every day since you’ve been here has been one of the worst days of my life,” Her words were locked between a shaking voice and unmovable indignation “Seeing you walking around camp, intertwining in my life, it’s like-”

“Like you never left,” Clancy answered, a heavy sigh breaking from his chest as one hand rose to glide over his face “Being haunted by a ghost you can’t ever get rid of.”

(Y/N)’s eyebrows furrowed, fingers twisting the apple in her hand once again, biting the inside of her lip in thought. Silence stretched between them, the moment between a firework ignition and explosion. Clancy’s pulse thrummed in his throat, fingers clenching at his sides.

Finally, her eyes met his, haunting and sunken, and suddenly, he wasn’t standing in front of one of the leaders of the Banditos. He was standing in front of the girl he’d met in Dema. 

“I wouldn’t change it, Clancy,” She said, firm and unshaking despite the flash of residual terror in her eyes. Like the weight of everything they’d seen and lived sank in all at once. A dam finally broken. A peak behind the curtain. “Any of it.”

He didn’t reply to that, meeting her with a soft look, tension in his shoulders sinking marginally. Perhaps he didn’t have to. Clancy’s eyes wandered from her face, following a path back to the forest. It was his turn to stretch the moment, weight shifting from toe to toe. His hands found the tape on the thigh of his pants again, taking a loose strand and pulling until it curled around his hand, tacky and wet. His eyes followed the raindrops that raced down the yellowed side until they crashed down to the floor. The tape twisted through his fingers, splayed from hand to hand.

“Do you think this will ever end?” His question lay heavy in the air, filling (Y/N)'s lungs with a putrid betrayal, a foul fighting comment behind her teeth.  

The gaze (Y/N) set on him was weighted, sharp, and had he been newly joined, he may have flinched, but his eyes remained unwaveringly connected to her own. “It has to. We keep trying until it does.”

Clancy was hushed into silence, tense this time rather than awkward, charged. His heart clenched in his chest, and his head ducked slightly, like a dog with his tail between his legs. Defensive irritation laced her face, and she breathed out a huff after a few minutes, fingers rising to pinch the bridge of her nose.

“I’m sorry I-” (Y/N) breathed, leaning her head back so the raindrops hit her face like paint on a canvas. She sighed, trying to ignore the cold that sometimes hit her lips when the wind blew. “Torch and I have been doing this for so long, it’s just…”

She paused, reluctance intertwined in the very root of her voice,“Sometimes I wonder how much I actually do compared to him.”

Clancy’s eyebrows pinched, shoulders bunching together, bile rising in his throat at the sudden confession, widened eyes turning to her with all the fear of a feral animal. His eyes met her side profile, holding himself like a deer in headlights. And yet he somehow found himself stepping closer until their shoulders brushed. (Y/N) flinched like a bow wound too tight, face shooting back down from his tilted angle to settle on the man beside her. 

Clancy’s eyes were kinder than they used to be, she noticed. Still worn and fire-riddled, but he seemed lighter somehow. He’d started volunteering for more social work, eating lunch and dinner with the Banditos, and especially spending almost all of his free time with Torchbearer. And yet, he still avoided her like the plague.

She tried not to think about why that hurt so much. 

“I never thanked you for pulling me out of there,” Clancy said simply, keeping his eyes dutifully fixed on her, watching the pull of her eyebrows as they contorted in confusion. 

“You don’t have to-”

“I do,” Clancy’s voice was borderline biting as it cut her off, but somehow managed to lack in venom. The same tone Torchbearer sometimes used to cut through the chatter when something needed announcing. Clancy sighed, turning back to the forest as his jaw set, teeth grinding beneath the skin. “I’m not good with people. Not like you are.”

(Y/N)’s eyebrows furrowed further as she extended a hand to him, to which he pulled away slightly. (Y/N) frowned. “That’s not your fault. I’ve been out here much longer than you have.”

Clancy turned back, eyebrows narrowed slightly, as if he were offended by the frankly unneeded reassurance, “I know that.” his face settled back to a somewhat neutral expression as he pressed the tape still in his hands between his fingers mindlessly. “Part of me is scared that if I’m not good with people, then maybe…”

Clancy let out a heavy breath, looking skyward, mimicking the pose (Y/N) had been in just minutes prior. 

“Then maybe it's because I shouldn’t be around them. That I’m meant to be alone”

It was as if (Y/N)'s heart fell right to her feet, a hole punched right to her gut. Queasiness gripped her throat, and it took every ounce of self-restraint still left in her not to yank Clancy into a hug and not let go until the very thought was buried in the tight squeeze of their interlocked bodies. 

That was what she had needed, she realised, as the same situation punched her right in the face. 

Instead, (Y/N)’s pinkie finger outstretched, brushing Clancy’s as the pair stared out into the darkness of the evening wood. Droplets soaked their faces, through their clothes and into their very bones. Behind them, the sounds of the camp settling in for sleep rang through the air. And Clancy’s finger wrapped around hers.