#chowderransom

after witnessing a full-fledged Ransom Panic Attack(tm), Chowder is like um??? that happens to me too, but, like, internally????

he’s a little nervous to ask rans about it though bc he doesn’t want to make him uncomfortable in case he doesn’t want to talk about it

he has a Bad Day, and his Bad Days are virtually undetectable unless you’re looking really hard, and no one notices, which is good, he tells himself. he doesn’t want people to know he’s having a Bad Day

at the end of the day, though, he finds himself sitting alone in the living room with rans

and he just... he feels Not Good

so he goes for it bc he doesn’t want to feel like this anymore

“rans?”

“yeah, chowder?”

“what does anxiety feel like?”

“um. kind of like someone’s strangling you but they’re invisible and you don’t know why they’re strangling you or how to make them stop.”

“huh.”

“why do you ask?”

“i... uh. i have that. all the time.”

and so ransom is immediately on the ball, telling chowder how he copes with his anxiety and letting him know that student health actually has some great mental health resources and recommending his therapist bc she’s the bomb.com

“i need a therapist?”

“you don’t need one, but it helps me. sometimes it’s nice to just talk to someone that’s removed from your life, you know? she helps keep me sane.”

“i dunno...”

“you don’t have to go, but if you wanted to, i could walk with you there? would that help?”

“yeah. yeah, that’d help a lot.”

after this discussion ransom starts doing little check-ups with chowder, just asking him how his classes are going and how he feels about the season and if his family’s doing well

chowder looks forward to this, bc rans is a safe place to vent about classes or family stuff or even hockey. he notices that he always feels better when he gets to talk to ransom and get all that stuff off his chest

ransom walks him to a therapy appt about a week and a half later, and chowder is skeptical, but it actually goes pretty well

it doesn’t fix him or anything, but it feels like a small step in the right direction

“Dude,” Holster says sympathetically.

“I know,” Ransom sighs.

“You told him his helmet hair looked nice,” Holster winces.

“I know,” Ransom repeats, not even trying to hide his grimace.

“I haven’t seen you be this off your game in... ever.” He puts an arm around Ransom’s shoulders, steering him back towards their corner of the locker room and away from the goalie stalls where Chowder is happily chatting with Jack.

“Maybe it’s because he’s a teammate?” Ransom shrugs.

“Nuh uh,” Holster shakes his head, “Freshman year you had Mitchy wrapped around your finger after two practices. This is something else.”

“God,” Ransom groans, “He’s just - fucking - do you see him right now?” He gestures over at where Chowder is sitting in his stall, running a hand through his hair and beaming up at Jack.

“Dirty pool,” Holster says, “Cute, hot, and a little bit crazy. Exactly your type. You never had a chance, bro.”