#chogiwaw write

"AND CUT!" The director yells and everyone is clapping. Seungcheol who is kneeling on the ground with his eyes full of tears is getting help from the actress he played with to stand up. Everyone is clapping because the shoot for the new drama is finally wrapped beautifully.

"THANK YOU FOR YOUR HARD WORK EVERYONE!" Seungcheol shouts. 

He is thanking everyone who has worked hard to make the shooting process easier for him. He is thanking his co-star Ahn Sumi, the newcomer who just made her breakthrough from her past drama. He takes photos with his co-stars and the staff while holding a bouquet of flowers from the staff as a congratulatory gesture. 

One by one, each light turns off and so does his life as an actor. He is no longer Seungcheol the top actor or S.Coups—a famous singer in the music industry. He is back to his ordinary life as Choi Seungcheol. Thirty five years old Choi Seungcheol who loves to take a long hot bath, drink a can of beer before sleeping while watching whatever his youtube home page is showing, and of course, talking with you about his day or listening to every rant you need to vent, especially about your endless work. Most importantly, he loves to play with the love of his life, his two years old daughter.

Seungcheol might appear as a single man who from time to time is involved in gossip for a dating scandal which he denied every time. He always put a high barrier every time he acted in romance movies or dramas with his co-stars. He always considers them as a good friend or as work colleagues at least. He likes to keep his work life professional, so falling in love with his co-star is out of the question, because you are the only one he could ever think off.

Seungcheol met you by the river eight years ago, he was twenty seven years old at that time. 

It was midnight when Seungcheol decided to go for a run at the jogging track by the river. He had just finished his schedule that day. It was a long and tiring day. He and his group needed to record their performance at five in the morning, then went to shoot for a show he can't even remember the name of, then proceed to practice for tomorrow's shows. It was really tiring but that night Seungcheol really needed to let it all out, he really needed to let go of the burden he had on his shoulder. 

He missed living a normal life as a guy in his twenties, so he ran that night by himself. He was feeling himself. Seungcheol was running so hard until he was out of breath. He rested both hands on his knee, his chest was heaving because he ran too fast but a smile grew on his sweaty face. 

He plopped himself to the grass, removed one of the heads of a wired earphone from his ears. He heard someone crying, bawling even, and he saw you there. You were very close to the river and Seungcheol's instinct was running towards you, because he thought you were going to do something he can't even imagine.

"Don't!" You stopped mid crying. Looking down at your wrist that gets held by someone. You dragged your eyes slowly from your wrist until you met Seungcheol eyes. Your eyes widened and you pushed him hard until he stumbled to the back. 

"Just don't do it! There are many things to do in your life!" This time, Seungcheol was shaking your body while holding you on your shoulder. Like he was trying to get your senses back. 

"I'm not gonna do anything!" You removed his hands on your shoulders. 

"Pervert!" You half shouted. 

Seungcheol's eyes might have popped out at that moment, he was trying to help you— he didn't want anything bad to happen to you but he got called a pervert instead.

"I'm trying to help! I'm not a pervert!" Seungcheol lowered his mask, trying to make you realize that he was indeed not a pervert.

That night, you didn't realize that he was someone famous until the next morning you saw his face when you were on your way to work. Your jaw was on the floor when you realized who you called as a pervert that night.

Days after, you were back sitting by the river. This time you were not crying, but you were lying down on the grass. Listening to songs on your playlist, until you found someone sitting beside you. Seungcheol was the one who sat beside you. This time you didn't scream or accuse him as a pervert, you stayed there in silence with him.

"Is it hard to be an idol?" Was the first thing you asked him. You didn't even bother to ask his name, because you see how tired he was. He looked as tired as you.

"It is but I love my job," He answered.

"Then what's with the long face?" You asked again. 

"I feel lonely." 

Seungcheol never asked your name and you never asked his name— one, because you knew his name already, his name was plastered everywhere, almost every billboard you passed by, had his face and name on it. 

The frequency of you meeting with him by the river was never planned, almost every Thursday night you met him there. There were times where you didn't meet him at all but you stayed there a little bit longer than usual, in case he was coming late. 

You were sitting by yourself that night and you saw him run towards your direction, still with fancy clothes. You had not met him for more than a month, so seeing him run towards you was quite a surprise. He was panting and trying to catch a breath before he took a seat beside you, handing you his phone.

"Can I have your number?" He asked, half panting. 

You stared at his phone before looking him in the eyes.

"You asked for my number first but you never asked for my name," You joked. 

He scratched the back of his ears, feeling embarrassed. 

"That was not so gentleman of me right?" He offered his right hand to you.

"Let me introduce myself, my name is Choi Seungcheol and perhaps, may I know your name miss?" You laughed before accepting his hand and shook it. You introduced your name to him.

"And yes, I already know your name."

After that night, everything about you and him changed slowly but surely. It all started with your little meet up place by the river at midnight to late night eating at the nearest convenience store, then to meet him at a private room at a restaurant to have a decent dinner. Until the two of you went to each other's house to spend more time privately. Your little apartment was probably not even a quarter of his penthouse but he really loved your little space. He loved your apartment more than he loved his big fancy penthouse.

The night where he asked you to marry him was a quiet night, you were sitting next to each other in front of the TV, watching his first ever drama where he was the main lead. Your head was resting on his shoulder— your favorite place to lean on, before he suddenly got up from his seat, leaving you on your own to the bathroom. He was inside the bathroom for more than fifteen minutes and he left his phone. You decided to check on him. 

"Cheol? Is everything okay?" You knocked on the door and he didn't answer.

"Cheol?" You knocked impatiently. You were afraid that he passed out in the bathroom because his schedule was too hectic. You let out a sigh of relief when you heard the door getting unlocked, you also pushed the door and were welcomed by Seungcheol who was grinning.

"You scared me!" You hit his chest lightly but he caught your wrist.

He kneeled suddenly, hand reached the back of his shorts, pulling out a small blue turquoise-ish box. You knew that box very well.

"Cheol?" You called him softly.

"Love," He called you,eyes were getting watery.

"Will you spend the rest of your life with me?" His hands were trembling but his voice was firm. 

You dropped your knees to the ground and said “Yes, I will.” 

You hugged him tight like your life depends on it. He was crying when he slipped the ring on your finger.

About six months after the proposal, the two of you registered for the wedding. Seungcheol asked his two best friends as the witness. Jeonghan— Seungcheol's best friend and Seungkwan— Seungcheol's manager slash best friend. After the two of you registered the wedding, there was no reception, just a simple dinner with the witnesses..

You knew very well what you got yourself into, living as the wife of a famous celebrity, but you knew it was worth it because you did it with him. With Seungcheol. 

"Cheol, wake up." You poke Seungcheol's dimple. The man is sleeping peacefully in your queen size bed.

"Hmm?" Seungcheol tosses and turns on your bed. You giggle after successfully waking him up. You put your daughter beside him and Seungcheol acts like he is unaware of his baby on his side.

"Daddy…" Your daughter calls her father. 

Seungcheol giggles when his daughter pokes his dimple, following what you just did seconds ago. 

"Do you miss me, my lovely daughter?" Even though Seungcheol hasn’t opened his eyes, his hands wrap around his daughter perfectly. Seungcheol snuggles to his daughter, earning a giggle from his daughter.

"Shall we invite mama too?" Seungcheol asks his daughter and your heart warms up seeing them being cuddly with each other.

"Mama, come hereeee." Seungcheol imitates your daughter's voice. The bed deepens when you join them, Seungcheol is in the middle, you are on his right and your daughter is on top of him.  His hands wrap around the love of his life tightly. 

This is the morning he always wanted. 

"It feels nice to spend my morning like this." He whispers to your ear before kissing your temple lovingly.

"I know right? But it would be nice if you let me go and drive me to work like right now." Seungcheol groans and whines to his daughter who doesn’t understand a single thing his father says.

"And you need to drop her off at the day care," You add. 

"So I'm all alone?" Seungcheol asks and you nod. 

“Why don’t you take your paid leave and stay with me here– we can do all sorts of things together.” He groans. 

"Well, you can enjoy your rest day without anyone bothering you." You peck his lips quickly.

"And maybe– I have a surprise for you tonight." You throw a seductive wink at him and a grin grows on his face. 

He knows what you mean by a surprise. So, Seungcheol picks his daughter up with his morning hair that looks like he gets hit by a typhoon. It is a mess but you love seeing him like this in the morning. He looks natural. He looks just like an ordinary person, just like you.

"Mama have a surprise for daddy tonight, baby" Seungcheol talks to your daughter all giggling and she giggles with him. 

Seungcheol is driving you to work and it is his routine every time he has a day off or when his schedule starts at noon. He drives you to work with your car to make it less suspicious. He is busy taking care of his daughter, settling her in her car seat. He always makes sure that her seat is safe. Then Seungcheol proceeds to carry your daughter's bags and arranges them on the trunk.

"Honey, before I forget again– Jeonghan asked us to have dinner in his house this Saturday. Do you want to?"

"What's the occasion? it's not his birthday yet."

"He missed our daughter."

"Then he can baby sit her and we can have our long forgotten date night." You joke. 

Jeonghan loves your daughter so much, he will spoil her to death, but baby sitting your daughter? Jeonghan probably will join her for a tantrum session.

Jeonghan was a big shot investor in the filming industry. The Yoon family company basically invested in almost every successful movie in the country. Jeonghan met Seungcheol years ago when Seungcheol just started to play in a TV drama as a cameo. Jeonghan saw his potential and told the PD if he ever thought of casting Seungcheol again, he would gladly invest in their drama.

Jeonghan welcomed you when Seungcheol introduced you to him. Your personality and Jeonghan's clicked right away, and you didn't have any hard time to befriended with him. Same goes as Seungkwan, Seungcheol's manager. Seungkwan was putting his guard up so high when Seungcheol introduced the two of you and eventually put his guard down when he started to spend time with you

"Remember, pick her up at 5." You remind Seungcheol while gathering your work bag and laptop bag.

"Yes, honey!” He salutes at you that makes you chuckle at his silliness. You lean in for a quick kiss before looking at the back seat. 

"See you later, my lovely daughter.” You send a flying kiss to your daughter and she sends you a flying kiss too. 

Seungcheol drives away after you get off from the car. Along the way to your daughter day care, Seungcheol keeps talking to his daughter about everything he loves every time he has a day off. Driving you to work and his daughter to day care, picking you up from work and his daughter from day care, doing absolutely nothing in house means he has the chance to do the house chores the way he likes it— he just loves his day off so much because it gives him the feeling of a father who is busy with his family. 

"Here we are my lovely daughter, daddy will pick you up at five sharp!" He gets ready before getting out of the car. Seungcheol puts on his hoodie, his mask, and his sunglasses. He checks himself in the rear mirror for a second before getting out of the car. He unlocks the car seat, hold his daughter gently in his arms before opening the trunk to take out his daughter's bag.

"Oh? Mr. Choi? It's been so long." Mrs. Jang, the owner of the daycare greets Seungcheol.

"Good morning Mrs. Jang. I just got back from a business trip." He lies. 

"Sena, do you miss your dad?" Mrs. Jang asks Sena and she nods.

"Oh? Does my lovely daughter miss me so much? We will play together with mom later. Daddy will pick you up at five sharp today." Seungcheol puts his daughter down and she runs straight inside without saying goodbye to Seungcheol, earning a laugh from Seungcheol and Mrs. Jang.

"Mrs. Jang, please take care of our Sena today." Seungcheol bows before handing his daughter's bag.

"Yes, like wise Mr. Choi." Seungcheol waves at Sena who doesn’t even look back before heading to his car.

Seungcheol is back at his penthouse. Your car that he used earlier is now parked on an assigned parking spot and he changes to his own car. He does it to prevent getting caught by paparazzi that he rides in someone else's car. He checks his messages and Seungkwan only texted him to let him know that he is scheduled for a photo shoot tomorrow morning. 

Seungcheol starts his car and drives to his gym to meet his gym buddy slash his group mates, Wonwoo. 

Seungcheol is also a leader of a four member boy group; the group has been on hiatus since two years ago. The group consists of Seungcheol, Wonwoo, Mingyu, and Hansol. Only Seungcheol and Hansol had a stage name, their stage name was S.Coups and Vernon. It's been so long since he met with the others, because their individual schedules are too packed and it’s making it hard to meet with each other. 

"Whats your menu for today?" Wonwoo asks.

"Leg day and you seem so eager to make your shoulder more broad." The younger guy scoffs at Seungcheol. 

"Are you still dating your girlfriend?" Wonwoo suddenly asks. 

"Suddenly? Why? And yeah we're still going strong now." Seungcheol answers. Technically he is not lying, because it is true that his relationship with you is still going strong– he just lies about the status. You are no longer his girlfriend, your status already got upgraded five years ago as his lawfully wedded wife. 

"Well, you know, I've been thinking about dating too but I'm afraid that because of me, she will get backlash." 

Seungcheol pulls the stops at the leg press machine. 

"Is she in the same industry?" Seungcheol asks. 

"No, she's an ordinary person. She's a lawyer." 

Seungcheol's grins grow wider because of Wonwoo love story that is way more interesting than the leg press machine.

It is almost lunch time when Seungcheol finishes his workout session. He has already finished taking a shower when he sees your messages. You ask him if he wants to grab lunch with you and of course Seungcheol agrees immediately without hesitation even though there is always a chance of getting caught by paparazzi. 

Seungcheol arrives at your office building and you are running to his car when you see his fancy car at the entrance. He is smiling from ear to ear when you run towards his car.

"I miss you so much." He pulls you into a hug right after you settle inside his car. 

"What do you want to eat for lunch?" You ask him.

"Oh? I thought you already brought one." He answers naturally because most of the time you already have the lunch ready, then the two of you will eat inside the car in the basement.  

"Should we eat out?" You suggest.

"Or is it too risky?" You change your mind because you are afraid to get caught in broad daylight by paparazzi. 

"No, let's eat out. What do you want to eat?"

Seungcheol always wanted to have a normal date like other couples. Having lunch or dinner outside, going to a viral restaurant or lining up to try a viral cafe with his loved ones, but he never did it before. He wants to act like a normal couple for once with you without the fear of getting caught by paparazzi. 

"Pork cutlet?" You suggest. 

"Nice choice!” He pinches your cheek gently. 

The pork cutlet place is not crowded even though it’s lunch time. You walk side by side with him, he is back on his ninja mode—that's how you like to call it. Nobody suspects anything, because it's really normal in your country to dress like that. You pick the furthest table that was blocked by a wall in case someone notices Seungcheol. 

You put orders for the two of you then when the worker finished taking your orders, Seungcheol lowered down his mask and took off his beanie. You hold his hands because you miss him so much and it's been so long since you eat out with him. .

"How was your work?" He asks. 

"Stresful as usual but I have more energy today because I can’t wait to go home and play with Sena and you!" You answer excitedly that makes him smile. 

Not long after the two of you are chatting, the food comes. The two of you dig in immediately while talking about this and that. When the two of you finish your food, you make your way to the cashier to pay while Seungcheol is waiting in front of the door, he is back in his ninja mode. You make your way to Seungcheol but stop at your track when you notice a group of teenage girls whispering to each other while pointing at Seungcheol. You know, Seungcheol's cover is busted. So you do what you need to do, you text him and tell him to go first without you.

Seungcheol looks back at you and you assure him with a nod before he walks away to his parked car. The group of teenage girls approach him, asking him a few questions and hands him anything for him to sign. He answers their questions happily and gives them a sign, before getting into his car and driving away.

You are watching their interaction before exhaling sharply and you are left alone, again.

Seungcheol pulls his car to the side. He calls you but you don’t pick up. He is afraid you will get caught or harassed by the paparazzi. As he almost starts to drive again, you call him back. You are in a taxi on the way back to your office. Seungcheol keeps saying sorry to you and leaves you all by yourself there but you assure him that it is fine and you know the consequences when eating out with him. Seungcheol feels a pang of guilt in his chest, bringing back the feeling that he already buries inside his heart and it starts to creep up. 

Seungcheol has been thinking about early retirement from the industry, not fully retired, just stopping appearing on the big screen. He will continue to produce and write music, but he cannot continue living his life like this for the rest of his life. He can't enjoy going to the amusement park with his little family. Accompanying you to the hospital for Sena’s check up or vaccination or going to your company end year dinner. He wants to have a normal life. He wants his family to live a normal life, like every other family.

It's 4.30pm and Seungcheol rushes to pick Sena up from day care. He thinks that it will be better to pick you up after office too. He arrives right at 5pm and all the other parents are already waiting for their baby to come out from the day care. He is waiting patiently until Sena's name gets called.

"Hello? Are you Sena's father?" A lady in his mid-thirties come up to Seungcheol.

"Ah? Yes, I'm Sena's father." Seungcheol bows.

"Finally I met you because every time I pick my son, I only meet with your wife, I'm Chan's mother." She introduces herself.

"Choi Sena is here!" Seungcheol's eyes light up when he hears his daughter's name.

"Here!" He waves his hands towards Sena. Making the little girl run to her dad with her little feet and falling right into Seungcheol arms.

"My baby, are you having fun? hmm?" Sena giggles.

"Thank you miss, see you tomorrow." He holds Sena's small hand and Seungcheol also bid his goodbye to Chan's mother.

"So you have a friend named Chan? He must be a boy right? He must like my Sena." Seungcheol talks to Sena.

"Daddy, mama?"

"Yes baby, let's go pick your mother up." He kisses Sena's cheek.

Tonight, the three of you are spending the night at Seungcheol's penthouse. You are taking a long relaxing bath after Sena successfully falls asleep in Seungcheol’s arms. It feels nice to let your body sink in a warm bath after a long day and you have zero worries about your baby because you are not alone tonight. 

You are relaxing in the bathtub, humming and singing along to the songs on the playlist you play for yourself until the bathroom door cracked open. Seungcheol with a smirk appears behind the bathroom door with a glass of wine in his right hand and a baby monitor in his left hand.

"Thank you," You sit straight up and take the wine glass off your husband’s hand and give your husband a sweet loving kiss on the lips.

"Are you going to join me or just stand there and stare at me?" You ask because Seungcheol couldn’t keep his eyes off you, he is staring at your face and your boobs alternately. 

"I'm waiting for the invitation and yes, I will gladly join you." 

You sip your wine while enjoying the view in front of you. Your husband strips his clothes one by one, like he is seducing you. His body never fails to make your breath hitch every time. You have seen it all, you have felt it, yet it never stops making your heart thumping hard.

"I see you are liking the view, my love." He says as he drops the last piece of his clothes, he takes his time to enter the bathtub, like he is teasing you. 

He sinks to the bathroom, facing you. The bathtub is big enough for the two of you but it feels suffocating, the atmosphere inside the bathroom has changed completely with Seungcheol naked in front of you. You offer him your wine and he gladly sips it. The way he never leaves his eyes from you when he sips the wine, making your stomach turn because of nervousness but  you know very well that he is teasing you. He can tease you and edge you without laying his hands on you, his eyes are enough. 

"Are we still playing this game?" You lean back and rest both your hands on the bathtub sides. 

He chuckles and scoots closer to you until he is close enough for you to wrap your legs around his waist. You let out a shaky sigh when you feel his hard length pressing on your stomach.

"I love to play this game with you, I love to see you look desperate and begging me." He whispers in your ear seductively, blowing a small air from his mouth to your ear before giving your ear a gently kiss. 

He plays with your damp hair, twirling it before tucking it behind your ear. His other hand was tracing a line along your thigh that made you shiver. While his eyes never leave yours, his eyes are getting dark, lust starts to take over him and you can clearly see the hunger in his eyes. 

"Please, kiss me." You beg, because you can’t take it anymore. 

Seungcheol smirks before leaning in to kiss you. The kiss is not sweet at all, it is full of hunger, desperation. It was messy.

Just like you love it. 

"Someone is too giddy?" Seungcheol teases you between kisses.

"You left me untouched for almost a month. I'm hungry for you. I need you." You say while trying to hide the moan that is on the tip of your tongue.

The beast that has been sleeping inside Seungcheol wakes up, he doesn’t even think twice to kiss you again, harder this time. He pulls you on top of him. You make yourself comfortable on top of him before wrapping your legs around his waist and grinding against his length. 

He is taking his time with you until the sound of Sena's crying voice blast through the baby monitor. She is crying frantically and calling your name. The two of you break the kiss and Seungcheol groans in frustration, this is the moment he's been waiting for. 

"You should enjoy your bath, I'll take care of Sena." As much as he wants to stay, he gets up from the bathtub. 

He kisses your lips quickly before getting out of the bath. He is drying and wrapping  his body as quickly as possible. Picking the clothes he takes off earlier and wearing it fast. He doesn’t even realize he wears his t-shirt inside out because he rushes to Sena’s room.

You peek behind Sena’s bedroom door after finishing your shower. Seungcheol is sleeping beside her with his arms wrapped around Sena, protecting his little angel from the monster under the bed. You tiptoe your way in, kissing your daughter's forehead good night and Seungcheol cheek too. You are not going to wake Seungcheol up, you are going to let them sleep soundly. When you pull the cover up, Seungcheol opens his eyes slightly before he smiles when he sees you. 

There is no word needed, his eyes speak enough for you to understand everything that he has in mind. Seungcheol moves very slowly, afraid that his movement can wake his little angel. Sena tosses a little, both you and Seungcheol are holding your breath. After making sure Sena is still in her dream land, Seungcheol gets out of bed. 

"Sweet dream, little angel." Seungcheol whispers before kissing Sena's cheek. 

Both of you make your way out of Sena's room quietly. His right arm wraps around your waist and his left hand is holding the baby monitor.

"Thank you, baby." You kiss Seungcheol on the cheek when the door behind you finally close. 

"What are you thanking me for?" Seungcheol asks, raising his eyebrow. 

"You let me take a long relaxing bath."

"Oh honey, you deserve it. You deserve the long relaxing bath more than anyone." He gently wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you closer. 

You rest your head on his shoulder, wrapping your hands on his waist too. The hug is much needed after a long day and after not seeing each other for a long time. 

"Why don't you change your clothes? You still wear the bathrobe." Seungcheol says as he brushes his palm on your back. 

"I don't think I need to, because soon, I won't need to wear anything, right?" You whisper in his ear that sends a shiver down his spine. 

"You are so right, because I will be the one who takes it off." He says in a deep voice that make you gulp but you are not backing down tonight. 

You seduce him back before with loosening up the bathrobe but he captures your lips right away before you could do anything else. The two of you make your way to the main bedroom without letting go of each other's lips. Bumping here and there was not a big deal until he pins you against the door.

You hiss when your back hits the door, quite harsh but you love it so much, so you don’t say anything. You love him when he is desperate. 

"Baby, the monitor." You remind him while tapping on his shoulder, the man is busy kissing your neck. 

“Right!” Seungcheol realizes he probably left it on the counter somewhere along the way, he hurries to look for the baby monitor, his lips are swollen and his hair is already a mess because of you. 

You open the bedroom door and jump to the bed, waiting for Seungcheol to come back with an elbow supporting yourself so you are not fully lying down. The bedroom door handles creek and you smirk when you see your husband is coming looking all sexy especially he is holding a baby monitor in his hand. 

"What a good daddy," You tease him. 

He gently put the baby monitor on the nightstand before crawling his way to you.

"Am I?" He is caging you. 

He leans down until his face is close to you– close enough until you can feel his heavy breath on your face.

"You are a good daddy, that's why I want to give you a present." You push him, so he is lying on his back. You crawl on top of him, settling down just right above his hips, bending yourself so he can see your breast slightly behind the bathrobe. 

"I can't wait to receive it." He rests his head on the head board, hands behind his head. 

The smirk on his face grows wider when you pull your bathrobe tie loose, exposing your bare body. You kiss his chest seductively and keep going down without breaking eye contact with him.

"Daddy?" Sena is pointing at the TV in front of her.

"That's right baby, it's daddy on the TV." You are smiling because Sena seems so excited to see his dad on the TV.

"Mama, where is daddy?" You smile at her, an assuring smile while patting her head

"Daddy is working at the moment, baby. Do you miss daddy?" You ask her but her facial expression changes instantly. 

She is crying. 

"Baby, you miss daddy so much? Should we try to call him?" You pick Sena to your arms, trying to calm her down by calling her daddy. 

He doesn’t pick up his call, he is probably in the middle of shooting. So you send a message to Seungkwan, asking if Seungcheol is busy at the moment. Seungkwan replies right away, telling you that Seungcheol is doing an interview for his drama with his co-stars.

“Daddy is busy at the moment, baby. I’m sorry.” You hug your child, rocking her so she calms down.

Your phone rings, Seungkwan is calling you so you pick it up immediately.

"Hello? Seungkwan?"

"Hello, I’m sorry but Seungcheol is shooting at the moment, is there something important? Do you want me to pass the message to him? Or is it private?" He asks.

"Oh? no no, it’s fine. Sena is crying because she misses her daddy. She saw Seungcheol on the TV." You explain

"Aw, Sena missed his dad? Sena do you miss uncle too?" Seungkwan tries to calm Sena down with a joke. 

"Sena misses her uncle Kwan too— well, Seungkwan, thank you for calling me. I’m sorry for bothering you." You thank Seungkwan who always responds to your message fast.

"No worries, I will tell Seungcheol to call you as soon as his schedule is done." He assures you before he ends the call.

Sena is no longer crying, she is all smiley by now.

"Daddy is still working, he will call us as soon as he finishes working." You explain to Sena and she just nods before snuggling into your embrace.

"Sena, do you want to go on a date with mama?" You try to cheer her up and distract her until Seungcheol finishes with his work. 

"Do you want to go out? Shall we have a mama-daughter date?" Sena doesn’t understand yet what mama-daughter date is but she is excited and nods while giggling.

You help Sena change her clothes and get yourself ready. You pack Sena's necessities to her bag before going straight to your car. You send a message to Seungcheol to let him know that you are out on a date with Sena.

"Sena, what should we do first? Should we play in the park first?" You ask Sena while settling her down on her car seat.

"Park? I like it mama!" The sides of your lips make high curves seeing your daughter excited with the idea of playing in the park.

You arrive at the park and the park is much more crowded than usual, a lot of families come to picnic or accompany their child playing in the park’s playground. You let Sena run around with you chase her, before she makes friend with other kids, so you let her be. 

You are sitting on the playground bench with the other parents. You feel a little jealous of a family that comes and plays together, a complete family like that one family in front of you who are busy playing catch with their son. You let out a sigh that is a little bit too loud. 

"Are you okay?" A mother probably in her forties asks you. You don’t even realize that she is sitting beside you. 

"Oh? Sorry, did I sighed too loud?" You apologize. 

"No, no worries. I hope everything is going well for you." She gives you a sweet smile and you smile back at her. 

"It must be nice to play with a complete family like that, especially when their father is around" She continues. 

"Ah, sorry, I’m feeling a little emotional today." She apologizes. 

"No, it's fine. Are you okay?" You turn to face her, to make sure that she is okay. .

"Me? no. I'm not. I'm in the middle of my divorce proceedings. Stressful." She laughed. The laugh is not a happy laugh, it is a laugh that forces you to hide your hardship in front of others. 

"Oh no, I'm so sorry it happened to you." 

"No, don't be. It is the best decision I made this year. He kept me and my son like a secret, he didn't bring me and our son to his company's end of the year party or dinner. He rarely brought us to his family gathering—he didn't even want to be seen with us. It feels like I’m watching a drama." She ends her short story with a chuckle. 

"He thought I was too ugly to be seen with him. I used to be fucking pretty too—I just don't have time to take care of myself because I'm too tired to do it after doing the chores and taking care of our son." She keeps talking and you keep listening to whatever she needs to let out. 

"In the end, I caught him cheating with his so-called "work wife" whose younger and prettier—I'm sorry, I overshared." She clasps both her hands in front of her mouth and apologizes to you again. 

"No, no, it's fine. I'm glad that you talked about it to me, I hope your divorce proceedings finish neatly." Hearing her story makes you overthink about your marriage with Seungcheol because you are nobody. Nobody knows who you are and nobody knows that you have a superstar husband. You open your mouth, wanting to talk with the woman again but you hear the sound of your daughter crying.

You rush to your daughter who is lying on the ground just below the slide, she falls down from the slide. 

"Sena? Are you okay?" You try to calm her down. 

You hold her up and brush her clothes that were full of dust. Her knees get scratched because of the fall and her palms too. Thankfully the wound is not that big but seeing her crying frantically makes you panic. You carry her back to the bench while telling her that everything is going to be okay.

"It's okay, baby." You soothe her.  

The mother who talked with you earlier is pulling out an emergency medical kit from her bag.

"Here, always prepared because my son loves the ground so much." She gives you her medical kit bag. 

"Thank you so much." You sit Sena on the bench before taking the medical kit bag. 

"Honey, we're single fighters. We help each other." She says while patting your back. 

You give her a thankful smile even though you are not a single parent, deep inside you feel like one. Maybe it is because of all the commotion that happened today, it makes you tired to handle it all by yourself. 

You finish cleaning her wound then give back the medical kit bag to her. You thank her once again before bringing Sena to the toilet to change her clothes. While changing you keep your smile all the time, telling your daughter that it is totally normal to fall and the wound will be healed in no time. You try to hide the tears that almost spill from your eyes, you are tired doing these by yourself. You couldn’t imagine how hard it must be for all the single parents out there. 

You take Sena to her favorite pizza place, it is in a famous Italian restaurant not too far from the park. Seungcheol brought the pizza from there once and Sena loves it very much, so every time you want to eat pizza, you always order it from there. 

The drive to the restaurant is less than ten minutes, as you park your car, you let out a sharp exhale before putting a big smile for your daughter on her car seat in the back. 

“Let’s go, baby!” 

Upon arriving at the restaurant, the staff ushered you right away to a four sitter table. The staff tells you in advance there will be a group around twenty that already book, so it will be a little bit too noisy. You thank the staff and order right away because you already know what to order. 

The foods come quickly as you expected and you slice the pizza in smaller pieces for Sena. 

"Yummy!" She exclaims

“Eat a lot, baby.” You smile at her as you take a bite of your pizza.

"Mama? That is Daddy!" Sena points her finger towards the entrance. 

Your eyes follow Sena’s finger and it is Seungcheol but he is not alone. He is with the whole filming crew including his co-star. The door opens again and Seungkwan walks in with one phone between his ear and shoulder and he is busy typing on the other phone. 

"Daddy! Daddy!" Sena shouts, calling her daddy that successfully steals attention from the surrounding. 

Seungcheol recognizes that voice immediately. His baby’s voice that always runs to him every time he shows up behind the door. He knows it by heart. Seungcheol’s eyes wander to look for his baby, his daughter– until he spots the two of you sitting side by side. 

When you realize Seungcheol and the whole crew's eyes are on the two of you, you try to calm Sena down before everything turns to something worse. 

"Sena, let's continue to eat." You plea to your daughter who is still calling his daddy. 

"No, Sena wants daddy!" She cries out.

You glance behind your shoulder trying to see Seungcheol but you can’t because Sena is getting out of hand to handle. 

"Daddy!" Sena cries out Seungcheol's name. 

Seungcheol's heart wrecks to pieces when he hears it. He wants to run and hug his baby, he wants her in his arms. 

"What a pitiful lady, her daughter keeps calling you daddy. She probably doesn't have one, so she called every man she saw, her dad." Sumi, Seungcheol’s co-star, makes a rude comment and Seungcheol glares at her. 

"What did you say?" Seungcheol angrily asks. 

"Her mom probably watched too much drama with you as the main lead, so her baby called you his dad. Her mother should behave her child—I know she's a baby but she disturbs the whole restaurant." His co-star keeps rambling that makes Seungcheol’s blood boil.

Seungcheol couldn't believe what he just heard. He knows that his co-star has a problem with her attitude, but he can't tolerate this. She is humiliating his family. His blood. 

"You should watch your words." Seungcheol says coldly. 

Seungcheol drags his gaze to you again. Sena is trying to climb out from the baby chair, so when he sees Sena almost fall down, his heart drops to his stomach. He can’t move his feet because it feels like it is nailed to the ground. 

"I got you, baby." Jeonghan comes out of nowhere to catch her in time. 

You are surprised to see Jeonghan here but you are really grateful because you have no idea what to do if Sena really falls from her seat. 

"Jeonghan, thank you." You thank him and he only wink at you as his response. 

“No need to thank me and you should relax for a bit. I got you.” He notices right away how tense you are.

Jeonghan sees Seungcheol with the crew, in fact Jeonghan is the one who invited them to have dinner together to celebrate another successful drama with Seungcheol as their main lead.

"Let me borrow her quickly and you should take your time to eat.” Jeonghan squishes your shoulder gently before bringing Sena to where the crew are sitting. 

"Jeonghan, don't." You try to stop him  but Jeonghan is being himself, so he won’t listen to you. 

With Sena in his arms, he takes big and full of pride at every step. Seungcheol is looking at Jeonghan who is picking his daughter like she is Jeonghan’s. As Jeonghan is getting closer to the table, Seungcheol notices a scratch on Sena’s knees. 

"Evening everyone," Jeonghan greets them, picking Sena’s right hand and waves it. 

"Mr. Yoon, do you know this child?" Seungcheol co-star asks.

"Oh? I know this child very well and I know her mother very well. The pretty lady right there." Jeonghan points at you, who looks concerned.

"Oh? Is she your wife?" One of the crew asks.

"Oh? I wish." Jeonghan chuckles that makes the other chuckle too but not Seungcheol. 

Seungcheol hates that joke very much. 

"Daddy," Sena's hands reach out to Seungcheol and without hesitation, Seungcheol takes Sena in his arms naturally. 

The whole crew look at Seungcheol weirdly because the way Seungcheol takes Sena in his arms naturally and the way Sena looks comfortable around Seungcheol, raise suspicions from others. 

"Seems like Sena loves you so much, Seungcheol." Seungkwan, who just ended his phone call trying to ease the tension before he realizes, he calls Sena by his name. 

"Oh? Mr. Yoon, how are you?" Seungkwan switches the topic right away to Jeonghan.

"Oh, Seungkwan, how are you? You look so busy these days." Jeonghan plays along with Seungkwan.

"Ah, no no, Seungcheol just has so many calls, but everything is under control." Seungkwan steals glances at Seungcheol who is busy playing and talking with Sena. 

"Uncle Kwan," Sena giggles while calling Seungkwan name. 

Seungkwan looks at Jeonghan, asking for help. 

"Does Sena remember Uncle Seungkwan?" Jeonghan plays along while stealing Sena back to his arms from her dad. 

"Of course Sena remembers me, right Sena?" Seungkwan leans in towards Sena, makes her giggle.

"Well, is it okay if my dear friend and her child join us for dinner?" Jeonghan asks everyone at the table and of course nobody dares to object to the investor. 

You end up sitting beside Jeonghan awkwardly with Sena in her baby chair. Seungcheol is sitting in front of you and you feel a little bit uncomfortable seeing how his co-star is sitting too close to him. You are jealous of her because she is younger, prettier, and skinnier. 

"Are you jealous?" Jeonghan whispers in your ear.

"Huh? No, why would I?" You smile at him, trying to change your expression, so it is not too obvious. 

Jeonghan chuckles before resting his hands on the back of your chair. Jeonghan's actions earn him whistles from here and there, because they are still thinking that you are with Jeonghan.

Seungcheol's eyes are burning with jealousy, he knows his best friend too well. He knows that Jeonghan purposely makes him jealous and boy, it is working. The others are busy chatting and drinking while Seungcheol never leaves his eyes from you. 

"You should eat." Jeonghan says to you. 

"I’m fine, I’m not that hungry." You give Jeonghan a smile before looking at Seungcheol for a mere second. 

"Let me feed her." Jeonghan stands up and moves his chair so he is sitting beside Sena and that successfully makes Seungcheol angry. 

Seungcheol kicks your feet gently under the table, signaling you to meet him in the toilet at the back. You try to put on a poker face before standing up from your seat and excuse yourself to the restroom. 

"Jeonghan, I’m going to the restroom for a while.” 

"Take all the time you need. Sena is happy with me." Jeonghan says as he happily feeds Sena the pizza. 

You walk rather quickly to the women’s room. You stand in front of the mirror and stare at your reflection. Eye bag under your eyes, your hair that you clipped carelessly—you haven't had time to go to the salon to do your hair. Your hair was getting long and messy. You didn't even remember when you had time for yourself, going to a spa, to a nail salon, you just didn't have the time for yourself. You let out a deep sigh before getting out of the women’s room. 

As you push the door, Seungcheol is already standing in front of the door, not too far from the men’s room door. He doesn’t say anything, even a simple hello– he pulls you to the side, so nobody won't find the two of you there. 

"Hey, what happened?" You ask calmly.

"What are you doing here? Did Jeonghan tell you that we're having a staff dinner here?" He asks, his tone was higher than your liking, both hands on his waist. 

He is pissed and you can’t do anything about it. 

"First of all, I'm taking my daughter to eat in her favorite restaurant and second, I don't even know that you will be having dinner here with your crew." You bark back as you fold your arms in front of your chest. 

"Then why did you act like you were a couple with Jeonghan?" He scoffs and it starts to get into your nerves.

"I didn't? We literally just sit there and eat our foods for God's sake. I don't even make any comments about how your co-star is acting all annoying and touchy with you." You finally snap at him, huffing at the end because you are so done. 

You are tired. 

"Oh please, we're just co-star. You know how I feel about her and why didn't you clarify that you are not with Jeonghan? You can at least deny it." Seungcheol counters back as he raises his eyebrows.

"Should I deny it in front of your whole crew and clarify that you are my husband instead? Is that what you want?" There is no friendly tone in the way you talk with him. 

"Do you want me to tell the whole damn world that Choi Seungcheol, the top star, is my husband? That we have already married for five years? That we have a daughter that misses her father so much she has been crying the whole day calling your name? Do you know how stressed I was when you walked through that door and Sena kept calling your name? Do you know how hard it is to act like we didn't know you at all? So you know how hurt I am seeing your daughter cry your name but you act like you don't know her? Like she is not your own blood and flesh?" You keep talking, don't give Seungcheol a single chance to talk– to interrupt you. 

Your tears are finally coming out from your eyes and you don’t even bother to wipe it. 

"Do you think that you are the only one hurting?" Seungcheol finally speaks up, feeling hurt with your words. 

"Then you should do something." And then you leave.

You leave the love of your life there, still shocked after hearing everything you have said. His heart is racing because he is mad. Not with you, but with himself.

You compose yourself for a moment and make your way back to the table acting like nothing happened but Jeonghan notices it right away.

"I think we should get going. It's almost Sena's bed time." You say to Jeonghan while gathering your things.

"Oh right, do you want me to take you home?" Jeonghan offers but you reject it right away. 

You give Seungkwan a small smile while he is helping you. 

"Thank you everyone for the dinner, we'll be going first. Sena, say thank you." You pick Sena up.

"Thank you!" Sena says cutely while bowing. 

Everyone is giggling because of Sena's cuteness and as you excuse yourself once again, you meet with Seungcheol again. You don’t even offer him a smile, you walk past him with Sena in your arms. Like you don’t know him at all. 

Jeonghan follows you to the car, he holds Sena’s bag and he walks by your side. 

"Did the two of you fight?" Jeonghan asks calmly after he settles Sena on her car seat. 

You nod and the tears start to pour down again from your eyes. You are really tired and you can't even talk about it to anyone. You've been keeping it to yourself, you don’t even talk about it to Seungcheol because you know he is also tired and stressed because of his work. You just don’t want to burden him more.

"Oh my." Jeonghan pulls you into a hug. 

A hug from a friend that you need the most because at the moment, only Jeonghan knows how hard it is for you. 

One of the crew sees the two of you in the parking lot, hugging. He runs back to the restaurant and announces it to the whole table. Seungcheol's face turns more sour, he is not done with being angry with himself, with the situation, and now he is burning with jealousy.

"Just stay for ten minutes more then I will make excuses so we can go early." Seungkwan whispers and Seungcheol doesn't even respond to Seungkwan. 

He is burning inside; he is angry with himself, he is angry with the situation, he is angry with Jeonghan because he should be the one who hugs you tightly and assures you, not him.

You just finished putting Sena to sleep, she keeps asking for her daddy and it hurts you so much that her daddy is not beside her at the moment. Sena is already at the age where she starts to understand about her surroundings and especially her parents

You plop yourself to the sofa, taking a long deep breath in and out to relax yourself even though your mind is not relaxing at the moment after fighting with Seungcheol earlier. Your mind is full of thoughts and  questions regarding your marriage with Seungcheol. You sigh and close your eyes for a moment. 

You never had any doubts regarding your marriage with Seungcheol but today is totally different from any other fights you had with him before. You are afraid that Sena is feeling lonely, she doesn’t have anyone else beside you and Seungcheol. You have no family, your parents passed away since you were in high school. You have no siblings and so does Seungcheol. The two of you have no family beside each other.

Especially with Seungcheol who is busy with his work, he rarely goes home. You are afraid that Sena starts to feel unfamiliar with her own father. 

Tears start to come out again but you brush it off when you hear your apartment door unlocked.

"Honey?" Seungcheol calls out but you refuse to answer him and make your way to the kitchen.

"Love, are you mad at me?" Seungcheol tries to stop you by grabbing your wrist.

"I'm tired, Seungcheol. Can we talk about this tomorrow?" You brush him off and continue your way to the kitchen.

"Why are you avoiding me?" He follows you to the kitchen, he stomps his way to the kitchen. 

"I am not, Cheol. I'm just tired." You stop him before he could go any further towards you. 

"I am also tired, honey. You are not the only one." He lets out a frustrated sigh, both of his hands rest on his waist– His face clearly shows how tired he is but you just can’t talk in a right mind with him at the moment. 

"I know that you are tired too, Cheol. I understand. But did you know how tired I was? How do I need to handle everything by myself? You rarely go home. You never came to the parent-teacher meeting. You never played with Sena in the playground. Do you know she was crying the whole day asking for his daddy? Do you know we tried to video call you once?” You take a deep breath and wipe the tears on your face. 

“Do you know I had to be the annoying wife that called her husband's manager just to ask about her own husband? Did the husband respond to her wife's text or call? Did you know that Sena fell on the playground and she was a crying mess and I was the only one who needed to calm her down and clean the wound? Do you know how hopeless I am?" Tears are streaming down your face. You can’t even stand anymore, you squat yourself down, head down. 

"I'm trying my best here. I really do." Seungcheol sounds defeated. 

He is hurting and so do you. 

Seungcheol is hurting to see you like this and you are hurting because you know, you just hurt him. 

"I know but I feel like I'm all alone in this. I'm tired of being hidden. For acting like a mistress. To stay hidden and untouchable from the outside world, for putting an act in front of everyone that my husband is a very busy business man that works on the other side of the world. Well, at least I can bear it all but Sena? Sena needs her father." You push yourself up and leave him in the kitchen by himself. 

You go straight to Sena's room, lying yourself down on the carpet slowly, not daring to make any noise, afraid that Sena will wake up because of you.

Seungcheol is still standing in the kitchen. He doesn’t move an inch. He stays there for a long time, his shoulder slumps like he is defeated. His mind is messy with everything that is happening at the moment. He knows very well how hurt you are because of him and it wrecks him. He takes his car key and leaves. 

Seungcheol doesn’t drive right away. He takes a breather inside the car, resting his head on the head rest. He takes his phone and sends Mingyu a simple message to let him know that he is on his way to his place. 

"Well damn you look wreck as hell." It is the first thing Mingyu says when he opens his apartment door. 

Mingyu is Seungcheol's group mates along with Wonwoo and Vernon. Mingyu knows about Seungcheol’s relationship but he doesn’t know the relationship has bloomed into something more serious– marriage.

"So, what's wrong?" Mingyu asks while pouring the whiskey.

"I had a fight, a big one." Seungcheol says then he drinks the Whiskey in one breath. 

Mingyu scoffs after seeing Seungcheol drink the Whiskey like it was a tequila and Mingyu is hundred percent sure the fight is taking a big toll in Seungcheol. 

"With your girlfriend?" Mingyu asks, trying to act like he doesn’t know it as he sips his Whiskey gracefully, a total opposite of what Seungcheol is doing. 

“Yes.” Seungcheol sighs defeatedly. 

"Oh? I thought you broke up already? I mean there's a rumor that you date your co-stars." Mingyu turns his seat to face Seungcheol. 

It is just Mingyu’s way to get all the information he needs. Mingyu knows the rumor of him dating his co-star is just another baseless rumor– he just lures him to spill all the beans Seungcheol has been keeping to himself.

"No, I’m not dating my co-star and actually we’re past the stage of girlfriend and boyfriend." Seungcheol looks at Mingyu dead in the eye and Mingyu pours another drink into Seungcheol glass. 

“What do you mean you passed the dating phase? Did you already propose to her?” Mingyu takes down the remaining whiskey in his glass. 

“We’re married.” Seungcheol says casually that makes the man beside him choke on his drink. 

"You what? What the fuck?" Mingyu doesn’t believe what he just heard, he is standing right now, marching back and forth while saying whoa for the nth time. His hands are covering his mouth on the floor at the moment. 

“You? Already married? Since when? For fuck sake.” Mingyu asks, frustrated because this information is not something that someone can casually drop. 

"It's been five years and next month is our sixth anniversary." Seungcheol chuckles bitterly after remembering their wedding anniversary next month. He pours the whiskey to his glass again and sighs hard before downing his drink.

"You gotta be kidding me—how could, how come we didn't know?" Mingyu sits down and holds both of Seungcheol's shoulders while shaking him lightly. 

"Seungkwan and Jeonghan know." 

Mingyu is speechless again. 

"Just them? The two of them?" Mingyu is shaking his head in disbelief. 

"I have a daughter too you know, she's so pretty just like her mom. Do you want to see her?" Another bomb is dropped casually and Mingyu can’t wait for another shocking news to be dropped casually by his leader. 

Mingyu is dumbfounded at this point. He is just processing the word of marriage and suddenly Seungcheol brings up his daughter. 

"How in the world do you keep it hidden so well? Your wife must be so tired to hide from the rest of the world." Mingyu suddenly feels sympathetic towards you and Seungcheol only gives him a wry smile.

"She's so cute right?" Seungcheol doesn’t want to answer Mingyu's question because he knows the answer already, so he pulls his phone out and shows Mingyu photos of Sena.

“She is super cute but I really need to know every detail that I’ve been missing since five years ago.” Mingyu demands as he takes out another bottle of whiskey for his friend. 

The second bottle of Whiskey is for Seungcheol. Mingyu doesn’t drink that much because his mind should be in the right place to proceed with every new information that is out from Seungcheol’s mouth. As much as Mingyu wants to be mad at Seungcheol for hiding such an important thing from him, Mingyu chooses to stay silent and listen to his best friend ramble. Seungcheol even cried at some point. Seungcheol keeps saying that he is sorry for you to handle it all by yourself. Seungcheol is mad at himself because he hides you from the rest of the world like a secret that needs to be kept.

Mingyu takes Seungcheol back to his apartment when the clock strikes at three in the morning. Mingyu even fell asleep at some point on the sofa and sober himself first before driving the drunk man back. Mingyu knows Seungcheol’s apartment but he never let anyone come inside, Seungcheol always said it is his private property so nobody is allowed to come in. Mingyu glances at the older guy who is sleeping on the back seat– he is sleeping with his mouth open. 

“Private property my ass, you have been hiding your wife and daughter there.” Mingyu says to the sleeping Seungcheol. 

After hearing Seungcheol left earlier, you end up falling asleep on the carpet in Sena's room. You are awakened by the apartment doorbell that keeps ringing. You reach your hands out to look for your phone and it is three in the morning. You push yourself up before tiptoeing your way out from Sena’s room. When you close Sena’s room, you rush to check the front with the intercom. 

The intercom shows Mingyu who is holding drunk Seungcheol. You unlock the door right away and run to the front door. Mingyu has difficulty keeping the man in line while opening the damn door because one wrong move, the drunkard will fall. You hurried to pull the door open, to let both of them in. 

"Hello, it's finally nice to meet you. I'm sorry we met this way but your husband's ass is so heavy." Mingyu greets you with a big smile on his face whereas he is struggling to carry Seungcheol. 

“I’m so sorry for bothering you, just drop him on the couch.” You apologize to Mingyu and helps him to bring Seungcheol to the couch. 

Mingyu throws Seungcheol's body to the couch and he sits himself right away at the carpeted floor right in front of the couch. 

"Your husband is really something else– he is getting more buff these days and I’m sorry for not introducing myself properly. My name is Mingyu, Kim Mingyu." Mingyu offers his hand to you and you shake his hand while introducing yourself.

"We should have met long long ago but this big guy right here decided to keep you under the radar." Mingyu nudges the side of Seungcheol’s waist, making the drunk man groan in his sleep and you answer him with a dry laugh. 

"I’m sorry, let me get you a drink. Is cold water okay for you?" 

“Yes, that’s what I need the most right now.” Mingyu smiles at you and you hurry to the kitchen. You grab a bottle of cold water from the fridge but stop for a moment. This is the first time you have met Seungcheol's friends other than Seungkwan and Jeonghan. You have seen Mingyu, Wonwoo, and Vernon from TV or in the concert but you never talk with them in person, you only know each of them from Seungcheol’s story. 

You make your way back to the tired Mingyu who is half sleeping on the carpeted floor until he sees you. He sits straight right away and takes the bottle you give him. 

"Thank you." He thanked you before cracking the bottle cap. Mingyu gulps down the water in one breath like he just finished a marathon.

"I wish I could meet Sena, but she must be sleeping right now." Mingyu says while giving you a friendly smile.

"Yes, she is sleeping right now." You don't know what to say further, so you only answer the question as it is. You still feel awkward meeting one of Seungcheol’s best friends directly because you only know them from his stories only. 

“I know it must be surprising for you to meet someone else from Seungcheol’s life other than Seungkwan and Jeonghan. As much as he is a big pain in the ass, he is still my best friend and my best friend's wife is also my best friend. So, just think of me as one of your friends.” Mingyu assures you. 

"Thank you, Mr. Kim." You thank him formally and Mingyu's facial expression changes right away, like he is hurting because you call him in a formal way. 

"Please, call me Mingyu. No need to be formal with me." 

“I will try.” You offer him a friendly smile that makes Mingyu laugh because everyone in this room–sadly it’s only the two of you in the room, three including Seungcheol, can feel the awkwardness out of you.  

"Sena, my baby, Sena." Seungcheol babbles in his sleep. You and Mingyu look at each other before looking at Seungcheol that keeps babbling and calling your name too. 

"Well, that's my cue to take my leave then. I hope the problem ends well." Mingyu stands on his feet and walks to the front door. You escort him to the front door, waiting for the man to wear his sandals. 

“Are you sure you don’t need my help to move him to the room?” He asks once again, hand already on the door handle. 

“No, he is fine on the couch.” You joke to ease the awkwardness between you and Mingyu. 

“Can’t agree no more. I’m taking my leave then,” Mingyu nods a little to you. 

“Thank you, drive safe!” As he leaves, you close the door. You walk to the living room, right to your drunk husband who is still sleeping on the sofa with his brows knit together like he is thinking hard in his sleep. That is his habit when he has something in his mind, he doesn’t sleep peacefully.

"Baby, wake up. Let's get you to bed." You tapped his cheek lightly to wake him up but he didn't budge at all. 

"Baby?" You call him again, still tapping his cheek lightly. Seungcheol's eyes flutter and he looks at you for a moment before he pushes himself up with his elbow to sit straight up on the sofa. 

"Love?" He still calls your name shaky. 

"It's me, I'm here." You take his cold hands and he pulls you into his laps, you fall right to him and he immediately wraps his arms around you, head resting on your shoulder. He is showering your shoulder with little kisses. 

"I'm sorry." He says as he looks up to you so his eyes meet yours. 

"I'm sorry for snapping at you." You apologize, giving his hands a squish. 

"No, I'm a total jerk. I am a bad husband. I don't deserve all the love you and Sena give to me." He shakes his head and tears start to form in his eyes again. 

"Don't say that, you deserve it. I'm just too tired and finally exploding. I'm sorry for talking to you that way." You hug him tight. 

"I deserve it more than anyone in this whole world. I'm sorry. I never have any intention to hide you from the whole world, I'm too selfish." Seungcheol says as the tears in his eyes finally make their way down to his face. You feel his tears on your shoulder and you tighten the hug even more. The two of you stay there for a moment longer, to reflect on everything that happened today.

"Shall we go to the bathroom? Let's wash your face, brush your teeth and change your clothes." You say as you help him to get up and walk to the bathroom. You sit him down on the closed toilet, put a hairband around his head.

You are busy washing his face with a damp cloth with his hands on your waist. He keeps squishing your waist even though it is a gentle squish, it’s still distracting you. 

“You know, there is a Japanese drama that is very similar to our story—the father is a top idol who is secretly married to an amazing woman with three children. His group member finds out and demands him to remove him from the group.” Seungcheol murmurs as you rub his face gently with a facial wash. 

“And?”

"And I think it will hurt me more to get kicked out from the group" He chuckles but not a funny one. A sad chuckle.

“What are you thinking, hon?” You ask him straight to the point and stop rubbing his face. 

"Retirement." Your heart drops to your stomach when you hear him saying the word retirement. 

"It's not because of our fight—I've been thinking about it for a while. I think I have done enough." He gives you an assuring smile with bubbles from the facial wash.  

"But you love your job, hon." You remind him and you continue to wash the bubbles away from his face.

"Lets talk about this later okay? When you are sober." You say and he nods.

Last night was a moment that you will remember for the rest of your life, not just you but Seungcheol too. That was the first time you had a huge fight with him and even though the two of you made up not long after, the two of you haven’t finished the talk about retirement. The most important thing right now is you are being woken with kisses and giggles from Seungcheol and Sena.

"Good morning, Mama!" Seungcheol exclaims as he sees your eyes open. 

"Morning, Mama!” Sena follows Seungcheol with giggles. 

"Morning the love of mama’s life." Both of your hands stretch out to hug them both. Sena is getting squished between you and Seungcheol.

Sena let out a squeal when Seungcheol attacked her with a tickle. Seungcheol doesn’t stop there, he attacks you with kisses all over your face that makes you laugh uncontrollably. 

A morning like this is what you wish for. The love of your life, lying beside you, annoying or tickling each other. Your heart warms up because you will exchange the world just for this moment. Most of the time, Seungcheol already left for his schedule even before Sena was awake. 

"Sena, let's prepare breakfast for mama!" Seungcheol says to Sena that makes the little girl jump from the bed like she is ready to conquer the kitchen. 

"Let's go, daddy!" Sena exclaims happily.

Seungcheol gives you a kiss on your forehead before running to catch up with Sena who is already waiting at the door. Seungcheol picks Sena up before he opens the door and he closes it slowly and before the door closes fully, Seungcheol winks at you. 

You stretch yourself on the bed, looking for a comfortable position. The smile hasn’t left your face and you hope it will stay all day. You hear a utensil falling and it makes a very loud sound but you don’t care. You don’t care if your kitchen will get messy or if any of your kitchen utensils breaks, because the most important thing is, Sena is making memories with his daddy.

The utensils can be replaced, the mess can be tidied, but the memories will last forever. 

Your hand reaches out to the night stand beside the bed, you grab your phone and as you unlock your phone. There are messages from Seungkwan, not just two or three messages but a bunch of it. There are five missed calls from Seungkwan and you know something is happening. You open the messages and most of it is asking for Seungcheol to answer his call and Seungkwan telling you to not panic. 

You jump right out from the bed, heart racing and you hold yourself to look Seungcheol’s name on the internet in the meantime. Your right hand is already holding the door handle but before you open your bedroom door, you try to calm yourself first before delivering the news to Seungcheol. 

"Cheol," You call his name softly with a smile on your face, a smile that only Seungcheol could understand. The smile on his face fades right away when he sees your face. He kisses the top of Sena’s head before walking towards your direction. 

"I don't know what happened but please call Seungkwan back." You hold both of his hands, giving it a gentle squish. 

“I’ll be right back.” Seungcheol kisses your temple before making his way to the bedroom. 

He grabs his phone on the night stand, the phone he hasn’t touched since last night. As he unlocks his phone, tons of messages from Seungkwan flood in, there are missed phone calls from his CEO and Joshua, head of PR. Seungcheol's hands are quick to find Seungkwan contact and calls him right away. 

"Where have you been? I've been calling you!" No greeting or small talk from Seungkwan only means one thing and it is not a good sign. 

"I'm sorry, I didn't check my phone at all." Seungcheol apologizes right away as he takes a seat at the end of the bed. 

"You are all over the news— someone leaked to the paparazzi that you are dating Ahn Sumi." Seungcheol lets out a heavy sigh as he leans his head against the head board. 

Another day, another dating scandal.

"Well? It's not a big deal. You know the truth, Kwan." Seungheol says, trying to keep his calm. 

"I know the truth but there is another rumor involving your family. So, you are two timing Ahn Sumi and have a secret family." Seungkwan explains and Seungcheol body tense immediately. 

"Come again?" Seungcheol stands up, he doesn’t believe what kind of nonsense the paparazzi has made. Seungcheol pinches his nose bridge and closes his eyes as he listens to Seungkwan's explanation. 

"I think the paparazzi bribed the crew from our last drama shooting. Your rumor with Ahn Sumi—considered it done, I have talked with Joshua regarding this. Her management is already in contact with Joshua but the problem is we need your clarification for your secret family." Seungcheol's head throbs again, it's not because of the alcohol he consumed last night with Mingyu but it's because of the sudden stress that creeps in. 

"I am not going to deny it, Kwan. You know it."

"I know, Cheol but the company thinks that you are still single. They think you are still dating." Seungcheol lets out a heavy sigh. His head snaps to the bedroom door when he hears the door is being open. Sena’s head pokes from the door, giving Seungcheol a smile. A very genuine smile that makes Seungcheol's heart warm instantly. 

"Sena, daddy is working." You are coming from behind, picking Sena up and before closing the door, you give Seungcheol your biggest and assuring smile. A small gesture to let Seungcheol know that he is not alone.

Seungcheol knows, he can't pretend anymore. He can't live a double life like this anymore. He can't hide you and Sena any longer. The whole world needs to know that Seungcheol is in fact not single. He is a husband to an amazing wife and a father to her loving daughter. He is done playing pretend.

He wants to drop and pick you up from the office. He wants to come to the teacher-parents meeting. He wants to be a father that always came to her daughter's recital. He doesn’t want to hide behind the mask, sunglasses, and hat. He wants the whole world to know his world; his everything.

He wants to be present in your and Sena’s life.

"Seungkwan, I think it's time." Seungkwan knows exactly what Seungcheol means by that. So Seungkwan lets out a deep exhale. 

"I'm going to set up a meeting in an hour. Is that okay?"

"Yes, I'm going to have breakfast first with my family then I will go straight to the office."

"Okay,"

"Seungkwan, thank you." On the other line Seungkwan's breath gets caught in his throat. Seungcheol never forgets to thank everyone who works with him. He always thanks everyone sincerely and he always thanks Seungkwan. 

Ten years of working as Seungcheol’s manager and this gratitude feels deeper, and meaningful yet hurt at the same time. 

"Just so you know, I always got your back. No need to thank me." Seungkwan doesn’t let Seungcheol reply to his words, he ends the call right away. 

Seungkwan knows what’s on Seungcheol's mind— he thinks of early retirement. Seungcheol jokes about it sometimes to Seungkwan. At first, Seungkwan takes it as a joke but seeing how drained Seungcheol is for these past months—Seungkwan knows sooner or later, the topic will come out from Seungcheol’s mouth not as a joke anymore. 

Seungcheol is back in the dining room with a smile on his face. He kisses Sena's cheek multiple times until Sena shrieks with happiness. Then he walks towards you, who is still busy flipping the pancakes on the pan. He hugs you from behind while pampering your shoulder with kisses until you giggle because how ticklish it feels on your skin. 

"Something is up." Seungcheol whispers, resting his head on your shoulder. 

"I know, I checked it on the internet already. Are you okay, honey?" You ask softly while brushing your thumb against his arms that wraps around your waist

"I'm not." Seungcheol says honestly. 

Seungcheol rarely shows the side where he burns out, he always acts tough in front of you and Sena because he doesn’t want you to be worried but he is too tired to pretend that he is tough. 

"Seungcheol, my love." You call his name softly, turning off the stove then facing him.  

You put your hand on the side of his face, giving it a subtle brush with your thumb. 

"You can do anything you want. Whatever your decision is, I just want you to know that you have me. I got you." Seungcheol couldn't hide his tears anymore, he let his tears run down his face.

"Daddy don't cry." Sena's little voice makes Seungcheol choke on his tears even more. He drops to the ground and hugs Sena tightly. 

You can’t hide the tears anymore, you drop to your knees, following Seungcheol. His hands wrap around you and Sena tightly. 

Everything he needs is wrapped around him. 

"Thank you, my love." Seungcheol whispers in your ears.

Pi Cheolin, The CEO of Seungcheol management massages both his temples. He laughed like a maniac when he first read the rumor first thing in the morning. Seungcheol dates his co-stars? Never. Seungcheol has a long time girlfriend? He knows about it. Does Seungcheol have a family? What nonsense this gossip forum spouting. 

But when Seungcheol came in fifteen minutes ago, dropping the truth. Pi Cheolin laughs, he laughs again. Not just maniacally laugh, a very scary stressful laugh. He doesn’t know how to react, so he just laughs as his coping mechanism.  

The other three sit in silence. Vernon and Wonwoo are processing whatever the hell Seungcheol said just now and Mingyu, who just happened to know about it less than twelve hours ago, chooses to keep his mouth shut. 

"Why didn't you tell us? We basically a fucking family and you hide a big news like this from us?" The first comment is coming from Vernon out, everyone in the room never expects that Vernon will be the one who talks. 

"We just met recently in the gym—we even talked about your relationship." Wonwoo feels betrayed by Seungcheol.

"You don't want to say anything, Gyu?" Pi Cheolin asks Mingyu who keeps silent the whole time. 

Mingyu looks around, trying to read the situation in the room. 

"No, I knew about this last night." Mingyu says honestly. 

Vernon scoffs, he gets up from his seat, walks towards the window with both hands on his hips. Vernon laughs to himself, he feels like he is the only one who doesn’t know about anything. 

“I feel so left out.” Vernon lets out a heavy sigh. 

"I'm sorry." Seungcheol’s head is getting heavier, he doesn’t even dare to look his group member– his family in the eye.

“What a good leader you are– betraying your own members, your family– oh do you still think of us as a family? Because the last time I remember, you are the one who always talks about us as a family.” Wonwoo says to Seungcheol, his tone was flat and cold.

Mingyu, who is sitting beside Wonwoo, tries to calm him down. Mingyu’s hands are already on Wonwoo’s shoulder, to keep him from going anywhere or worst case, to stop him from punching Seungcheol. 

"Let's fight after this but what are you gonna do right now, Seungcheol? Joshua already talked with Sumi's management to deny the allegation but what are you gonna do about your alleged family?" Seungkwan asks Seungcheol. Seungkwan’s phone never stopped ringing since the news broke out in the morning. 

"I'm not going to deny it. I'm going to come clean that I have a wife and a daughter. I'm also going to announce my retirement." The last word snapped everyone's head to Seungcheol. 

Silence. 

Everyone in the room couldn't believe what they just heard.

"Your what?" Pi Cheolin asks again to confirm Seungcheol's words. 

"My retirement." Seungcheol says without any hesitation. 

"Oh my—" Seungkwan closes his eyes. He is cursing under his breath because all the prayers he chanted all morning goes to waste. 

Pi Cheolin drops his head to his desk, he feels defeated. Vernon's jaw is on the floor. Wonwoo rubs his temple. Mingyu gets up from his seat and stands beside Vernon. 

"I've been thinking about it for months and today is my last straw. I can't hold it any longer. I want to live like an ordinary person who is married and has a family.” Seungcheol says, his eyes already full with tears.  

“I want to have lunch with my family in a family restaurant just like any other family. I want to attend my daughter's parents-teacher meeting. I want to pick up my wife from work and go to her company's annual dinner. I just want to enjoy my life as a husband and a father. I want the world to know my whole world." Tears start to stream down on his face. 

Seuncheol’s head hangs low, he can’t even look his group member in the eye, all the staff that have worked hard from the very first time he debuted up until now. 

"Okay," Pi Cheolin claps both of his hands loudly, stealing the attention from everyone in the room. 

"Let's do exactly that." Pi Cheolin continues. 

"I'm sorry, what?" Joshua asks, he propped his head up. 

"Let's have a press conference and a formal announcement letter." Pi Cheolin says as he stands up from his seat, walking towards Seungcheol. Pi Cheolin stands right behind the man, putting both of his hands on Seungcheol’s shoulder. 

“We’re going to make a clarification once and for all. Let Ahn Sumi management post a clarification, we will stay still until tomorrow. We’re going to hold a press conference regarding his status as a married man.” Everyone starts to murmur after hearing Pi Cheolin’s strategy. 

“Isn’t it too risky?” Joshua asks.

“It is, everything is too risky at this point, but trust me.” Pi Cheolin squishes Seungcheol’s shoulder lightly. 

Joshua inhales sharply because he knows that he won't be able to sleep soundly for at least a week and the entire PR team will pull an all-nighter.

"Are you serious? What about his reputation? What about us? Are you going to disband us? I don’t want us to disband." Vernon says nonstop. 

“I’m going to retire, that means I’m going to quit the group.” Seungcheol says and Wonwoo scoffs. 

“After all the mess you made, you are going to quit? What about us? What about your so-called family that you left behind? It’s so easy for you to say that." Anger takes over Wonwoo, he walks out from the meeting room. 

“Wonwoo,” Seungcheol wants to run after him but Pi Cheolin keeps him at his seat. 

“Let the man cool off.” Pi Cheolin says to Seungcheol. 

“The most important thing is, we don’t need to worry about anything. The Seungcheol scandal won’t harm the group and everything will work as I imagine. Trust me.” Shiver runs down Seungcheol's spine, he knows Pi Cheolin is a hella good CEO but hearing him solve the problem directly, this is the first time ever. 

"Joshua, you need to start contacting our investors— especially Mr. Yoon Jeonghan. Then contact every brand that endorses and collaborates with Seungcheol. Also contact the media. Get the legal team to work for any threat and malicious comment regarding Seungcheol and his family.” Pi Cheolin starts to list the things to do before the conference press tomorrow. Joshua and his team, busy typing everything Pi Cheolin asks them to do. 

“But, I have a question for you, Seungcheol." Pi Cheolin suddenly asks as he makes his way to his seat. 

Everyone who is busy typing stops mid air and for the first time since Seungcheol entered the meeting room, he lifts his face and looks at Pi Cheolin right in the eyes. 

"The reason I did all of this is because I trust you and your decision, but if everything that I calculate went south, are you going to risk it all? risk everything that you have built this far? fame, money, fans. Are you?" Pi Cheolin takes off his glasses as he asks Seungcheol.

"Yes, everything for my world.” Seungcheol answers without any hesitation.

Seungcheol is sitting on the office park bench alone after the meeting. He is looking at the gloomy sky, it feels like the universe knows about his feelings at the moment. He pulls his phone out from his back pocket, unlocks it and finds a text message from you. 

Is everything okay?  

He sighs hard before pressing the call buttons and by the third ring, you pick up the call. 

"Hey, are you okay?" You ask right away without any greetings, he can hear the concern in your voice. 

As much as he hates to admit it, Seungcheol can’t help it but to talk it out with you. 

"Honestly? No." Seungcheol heard your worry sigh on the other line. 

"I'm sorry, I couldn't be there for you." 

"It wasn't your fault, so there is no need for you to apologize." Seungcheol assures you as he leans back. 

"I know love but I feel sorry because I cannot be there for you."

“You are here with me, on the phone.” A small forceful smile grows on Seungcheol's lips.

"If my reputation is ruined and I don't have any jobs anymore—are you going to leave me?" A chuckle slips from your mouth. 

"Love, why would I leave you? You can be a house husband." You joke, trying to ease the tension that has been building on his shoulder. 

“A house-husband?” Seungcheol echoes, he is laughing now. A genuine laugh that doesn’t last long. 

"Is my baby taking her nap?" Seungcheol asks, after a long pause. 

"Yes, after a long battle, Sena is finally asleep." You stretch your body on the sofa, eyes back on the TV, and watch entertainment news that talk about Seungcheol’s scandal. 

"Seungkwan will pick you up from home to the company, is it okay?" Seunghceol asks you because he just remembered that Pi Cheolin asked him earlier. 

“Yes, Seungkwan called me earlier just before you called me. We’ll be going there after Sena’s nap.” 

You always wonder about Seungcheol’s company, BOMG, The company that’s been like Seungcheol’s second home growing up because he spent most of his youth here. Starting from the bottom until he reaches his peak. 

As you step your foot for the first time in the company, you can’t help but get mesmerized by how big and lavish it is. Seungkwan ushers you and Sena from the back door, getting inside an elevator that goes straight to the seventh floor. Seungkwan hasn’t let go of Sena's hand ever since the little girl got out of the car. 

Seungkwan calls your name, he gives you an assuring smile to let you know that everything is going to be okay. 

You follow Seungkwan who is now picking Sena’s up in his arms walking down the hallway. All eyes are on the three of you and you can’t help but look down because of the sudden embarrassment that takes over you. 

Seungkwan stops in front of a meeting room, he turns to look at you. 

“Here we go.” He pushes the door and the chatter stops immediately. 

“Everyone, this is Mrs. Choi and Choi Seungcheol’s daughter.” Seungkwan announces and everyone in the room greets you politely. 

You bow deeply as a gratitude and apology. 

“Daddy!” Sena wriggles from Seungkwan’s arm that makes Seungkwan put her down gently. Sena runs right away to her daddy and falls into her dad's arms. 

“My baby.” Seungcheol plants a kiss on top of Sena’s head before picking her up. A smile rises from his mouth when Sena’s little hands wrap around his neck, then hide between the crook of Seungcheol’s neck. 

You are sitting beside Seungcheol with Sena on Seungcheol laps, scribbling something in a piece of paper that was given by Wonwoo from earlier. Every eye in the room is focusing on a little girl that is busy in her own world. 

"She really took her mother's features." Vernon says to you with a nod and you thank him. 

"Sena, will you invite me to your third birthday party? Uncle will give you whatever you want." Mingyu says to Sena while waving his hands, trying to get Sena’s attention. 

"Uncle will be your photographer on your third birthday if you invite me." Wonwoo doesn’t want to lose to Mingyu. 

"Uncle will provide any entertainment you want— you can invite all of your friends and uncle will perform a magic trick." Vernon who apparently can’t do a single magic trick trying to steal Sena’s attention and he earns a heavy side eye from Wonwoo and Mingyu

"Sena will send the invites to uncle Wonwoo, uncle Mingyu, and uncle Vernon. So please, bring a lot of pretty gifts for me." Seungcheol says cutely, trying to follow the way Sena talks. The three grown up men roll their eyes. 

"Mama." Sena hands reach out to you still with the pen in her little hand and you pull her to your lap from Seungcheol’s laps. 

"Sena didn't even want to sit on your lap for too long— she probably forgot that you are her father because you are too busy with your work.." Snarky comments come out from Vernon’s mouth. Seungcheol wants to counter Vernon’s comments, he opens his mouth but nothing comes out, so he closes his mouth again. 

The meeting room’s door opens, Pi Cheolin comes in. His sunglasses still sit perfectly in his nose, he walks towards you who already stands up to greet him. He reaches out his hands to you, offers you a hand shake. You shake his hands while introducing yourself. 

"Finally we met." Pi Cheolin takes off his sunglasses and puts it back after. 

“Updates?” Pi Cheolin asks as he takes a seat at the end of the table. 

"Sumi's management already denied the allegation. It's only us now." Joshua reports right away and shows Sumi’s management press release regarding the dating scandal. 

"Our team already contacted the news forum and journalists for our press conference tomorrow.” Joshua continues. 

“Well, let’s hope for the best for tomorrow.” Pi Cheolin throws a wink at Seungcheol before standing up. 

“Before we finish this meeting, Jihoon, the legal team should make sure there will be no harm or false accusation towards the artist and his family. We will protect our artists and their loved ones.” Pi Cheolin remarks before bidding his goodbye. 

“Everything will be fine, love.” You squish Seungcheol's thigh gently. 

“I hope so, love.”

Right after the meeting, Seungkwan takes both you and Sena back to your apartment because Seungcheol’s apartment complex is already full with paparazzi. Seungcheol doesn’t even go home, he is spending the night at the office. 

As you arrive at your apartment, Seungkwan helps you with your belongings because Sena is asleep and refuses to let go of your hug. 

“Thank you, Seungkwan.” You thank him again as you walk him out from your apartment. 

“No worries, that’s my job to keep the three of you safe.” You let out a relief sigh as he pulls you into a hug. 

“I’m going back now, if you find someone that looks suspicious or paparazzi, please contact me right away.” Seungkwan says as he turns around and leaves. 

You lie on your side on the sofa, right hand supporting your head while your other free hand is scrolling on social media. You read some news articles about Seungcheol’s scandal, they talk about how Seungcheol’s management has not dropped any clarification and they are curious about the press conference that will be held tomorrow morning. 

Your phone buzzes and Seungcheol is the one who called you. You pick up the phone and his raspy voice greets you. 

"I miss you." You chuckle after hearing it.

"We literally saw each other an hour ago." You said softly while turning to your left side. 

“So, I can’t miss you even if we just met each other an hour ago?” He asks, pouting his mouth. 

“You can, love and the truth is I miss you too.” You say with a gentle smile but Seungcheol doesn’t response right away, 

"What if everything went south tomorrow? I don't have any jobs left. My savings are all gone because I need to pay the penalty fee. What should I do? I'm afraid." You can sense the fear in his voice. He is anxious. He overthinks.

"Then it's my turn to make a living—I saved up enough for us, well not as much as your income but it will be enough for the three of us. You've been providing us this whole time while I work the whole time. I rarely used my salary because you always said I should save it up. Now my savings can be useful." You tried to assure him but it only made him sigh hard.

"Then I failed as your husband and Sena's dad. I cannot provide you anymore." 

"Love, you remember that you have royalty up to your name right? You can still work as a producer and song writer. You might no longer work in front of the camera but you can work behind the camera—and we never know what will come tomorrow." 

"I wish you were here." He sniffles and you know, he is crying.

"I wish the same, love. I wish I could hug you and tell you everything is gonna be okay." Tears start to build up in your eyes. 

Your distance from Seungcheol is not that far, you are only thirty minutes drive apart but it feels harder than before your marriage. You used to have a long distance relationship with him especially when his group is still actively promoting and doing world tours. One continent to another, one country to another, one city to another; it was hard to schedule a date with him but tonight? It feels harder even though the distance is not far. 

And it breaks your heart more with the actual distance not too far but you need to keep a distance for a while with him until everything settles down. 

You couldn't even sleep properly last night. You are talking with Seungcheol until two in the morning until he falls asleep while listening to you. You glance at the clock and it is almost ten in the morning, which is when Seungcheol's press conference will start soon. 

You put Sena’s down in her play mat and turn on the TV. You switch to one national TV channel who will broadcast Seungcheol’s press conference. The conference room is still empty, the only sound you can hear from the TV is a typing sound and a murmur from the reporter and journalist that come. 

Right at ten o’clock, the side door is open and Seungcheol is wearing a simple black tuxedo. He walks with his head down. His steps are heavy and his shoulder slumps down. His face shows how he is not sleeping properly and his eyes are puffy after crying. He bows deep to the media before he takes a seat. The camera flashes with every step he takes. 

He takes a spot in the center, behind the lecterns that are already full of microphones from news outlets. 

"First of all, thank you to all the media, journalists, and reporters that come today." Seungcheol bows deep once again.

“I am going to clarify about the allegation that has made a stir yesterday, I apologize because of the commotion that happened because of me.” Seungcheol takes a deep breath before continuing. 

“I am not in a relationship with actress Ahn Sumi and I am deeply sorry for not making the clarification sooner and getting a lot of backlash. I am sorry.” Seungcheol bows again. 

“And with that, I’m going to clarify that I, Choi Seungcheol, have indeed tied a knot in a marriage with someone I love and cherish. We also have become a little family of three with the presence of my daughter. I am sorry for hiding them and being a coward for hiding and not showing my love.” Seungcheol takes a moment to adjust his breath and his heart that beats fast. 

“I deeply apologize to everyone who is hurt because of me. To my fans who have always supported me since day one, I am sorry for breaking the trust you have given to me. I am sorry.” Seungcheol bows, deeper and longer.

Your hands clutch the blanket on the sofa because your heart breaks into pieces after seeing the man you love hurting. His eyes are glistening because of the tears in his eyes that can fall at any time.

It is almost midnight when you hear your apartment door unlocked. You get up from the bed, rush to the front and find Seungcheol who is trying to get the shoes off. He doesn’t even notice you at first because his head hangs low. 

"Love?” You call him with a gentle voice. He looks up and he falls right on his knees. You hear a little sob from him that makes your heart wrench.  

"Seungcheol?" You walk to him, get on your knees and pull him into a tight hug. 

You let him cry on your shoulder, you saw him cry before but not like this. He was crying hard, his breath caught in his throat. You didn't make a sound, you just hugged him hard and rubbed his back. Tears flowing down on your face, your heart wrenched seeing the man who always stood tall, broke down in front of you.

You let him cry on your shoulder for as long as you can remember because the numbness on your feet is not comparable with what Seungcheol feels at the moment. 

“Love, let’s move to the couch.” You help him to stand, the man who always looks strong in front of you, who always looks dashing in your eyes is showing another side of him that you never see and you embrace this side tightly.

You help him settle on the couch before making your way to the kitchen to get him a glass of water. You are back and he still gives you a smile, even though it’s a forced one. 

"Seungcheol," You gently take a seat beside him, putting your hands on his hair, giving his messy hair a brush with your fingers. 

"It's over." Seungcheol says as he hugs you.

 You don’t say anything, you just let him hug you and you hug him tighter. 

He is always there for you, he always welcomes you with open arms and now, it is your turn to welcome him with open arms. He always assured you that everything will be okay and now it is your turn to let him know that you have his back and everything will work the way it should be.

"Everything will be fine, honey. Everything will work the way it should be."

You just get an approval from your manager for work from home arrangement for a couple days because urgent matters– the urgent matter is Seungcheol hasn’t come out from the room for a while and you feel anxious about leaving him all by himself. You announce to him that you will be dropping Sena at day care real quick, he kisses the top of Sena’s head and your cheek before going back to lie down in the bed. 

You are back from dropping Sena at daycare and Seungcheol hasn’t moved an inch. 

"Honey, let's eat breakfast." You hug him from the side and he turns around to face you.

"We made you a waffle with a rainbow sprinkle on top of it." You say cutely, trying to cheer him up. 

"Thank you, love." Seungcheol cups the side of your face and strokes your cheek before he pulls himself out from the bed.

Before he takes another step, a heavy sigh is out of his mouth. His steps are heavy as he walks to the bathroom, he is always excited every time you make a waffle with rainbow sprinkle on top and it hurts you to see him in this state. 

Your phone buzzes and you see Seungkwan’s name as the caller but you only stare at it, you don’t answer nor reject it until the call ends. 

"Baby," You run towards Seungcheol who just came out from the bathroom and hug him tight.

"I love you." You whisper before you give him a peck on his lips. 

"Thank you for always loving me. What would I do without you by my side?" Seungcheol hugs you tightly and rests his chin on your shoulder as you stroke his back.

Seungcheol doesn’t check his phone at all, he doesn’t know that Seungkwan has been calling him and you. You respect your husband, so you decide to let him have a moment without any interruption from outside when he is feeling down. 

He eats his breakfast not as cheerful as he used to, he doesn’t even finish it all but he thanked you for making the breakfast extra special for him. 

“I’m going to do chores right now– I’m going to do the dishes,"

You stop him before he can move to the sink.

“I’m going to do the dishes and you just need to sit still.” You push him back to his chair but he shakes his head. 

“I need to get busy.” He forces a smile that wrench your heart.

“Well, you can put the laundry in and fold the dry one.” 

“That’s what I like.” He kisses your lips quickly before making his move to the laundry room. 

You are busy doing the dishes when the doorbell rings, you rinse your hand full of soap and run to the front door. You open the door and are greeted by the angry Jeonghan. 

"Where is that bastard?" Jeonghan's chest rises and falls like he just came after running a marathon. 

"Han, not now." You stop him before he tries to make his way inside.

"I've been calling him since morning— basically everyone is trying to reach him out." He raises his tone. 

You are quite taken aback when Jeonghan raises his voice at you. Jeonghan lets out a frustrated sigh when he realizes he just raised his voice at you.

"I'm sorry but please let me talk to him."

"He is not in a good condition, Han." Your eyes get watery again, remembering your husband broke down in front of you last night.

"I know, we all know. Trust me, okay?" You nod before moving to the side to let Jeonghan come in. 

You gesture to Jeonghan to wait before knocking the laundry room door. 

"Honey, I'm going to the store for a moment." You announce it loud enough for him to hear.

"Okay! Be careful!" He shouts back and you look at Jeonghan briefly before making your way out. 

Seungcheol is busy, more like making himself busy in the laundry room because it helps him to distract all the bad thoughts. The laundry room door opens and Seunghceol turns his head right away, thinking it would be you who comes in but his face turns sour as he sees Jeonghan. 

“What do you want?” Seungcheol looks away. 

"Let's talk, Cheol." Jeonghan steps in and takes a seat on the floor right in front of the dryer and Seungcheol does the same. 

So the two of them sat beside each other in the laundry room while facing the dryer that spun all the clothes inside.

"I already prepared for the worst and I'm going to work behind the scenes as a producer and song writer." Seungcheol says before Jeonghan says anything. 

“Regarding the loss, I think I saved enough for the penalty fee and that should cover all the loss for you and the company.” 

"Probably working in front of the camera is not the best option after all." He tries to choke up a laugh.

“Have you read the news? Most of your fans support you. They know how harsh it was to work as a public figure, especially an Idol. In the span of twenty-four hours, the whole nation couldn’t stop talking about you. Thousands of them hate you for being in love and living your life behind the camera, but millions support you.” Jeonghan says with a little anger, because the man beside him, his best friend, already thought the worst. 

"Joshua gave me a report last night, almost all of the brands that you worked with, only two brands that decided to stop working with you. The penalty fee? You don't need to worry about that. In fact, three brands that target families reached out to work with you; you as their new brand ambassador." Seungcheol looks at Jeonghan in disbelief, like what Jeonghan says is full of nonsense. 

"What a funny world isn't it? You are loved, Seungcheol. People like you, adore you—yet you don't believe in yourself. As your best friend, I was mad. Hella mad when you decide to retire without even talking about it to me– you can talk to me about everything." Jeonghan continued as he put his arm on Seungcheol’s shoulder. 

"I don't know— I don't know if I did the right thing."

“Just believe in yourself, Cheol. Maybe that rumor was your wake up call.” Jeonghan pats Seungcheol's shoulder before getting back on his feet. 

“You have a family that will always welcome you. A beautiful daughter that solely becomes your reason to live and a loving wife that always has your back. Your life? I was jealous of you for living my dream.” Jeonghan chuckles as he stands up. 

Jeonghan’s right hand is already at the door handle but before he pushes the handle down, he turns his head to the side "Give Seungkwan a call, he is going crazy because of you." 

Jeonghan leaves Seungcheol by himself at the laundry room. 

Seungcheol leans his head to the wall, he looks up to the ceiling and inhales sharply before he pushes himself up. He makes his way out from the laundry room to the main bedroom. He takes his phone out from the nightstand and turns it on. Dozens of calls from Seungkwan and Jeonghan, hundreds of messages from people whom he worked with—everyone is worried about him.

It doesn’t take him a long time to call Seungkwan back and he picks it up before the second ring. 

"CHOI SEUNGCHEOL!" Seungkwan shouts and Seungcheol lets out a chuckle after hearing Seungkwan.

"How dare you laugh? I almost lost my mind because of you?" Seungcheol can hear the frustration in Seungkwan’s voice.

"I'm sorry, Seungkwan. I need time." Seungcheol can hear the relief sigh that comes out from Seungkwan mouth on the other line.

"I know but there are so many things that happened and as your friend, I want to let you have all the time for yourself but as your manager, there are dozens of casting calls for you." Seungkwan explains. Seungcheol is quite taken aback because of what Seungkwan just said, he takes a seat on the edge of his bed. 

"I'm going to let them know that you still need time after everything that happened, at least until the end of this week. Is it okay or do you need more time?"

"Sorry, this is a lot to take. Can I talk about it first with my wife?" 

"As your best friend, I want to tell you that you are very lucky to have her as your wife. You have a home to rest when things get hard and your home always welcomes you. I'm glad that you have someone by your side, Cheol." 

At the same time, you walk in without knowing that Seungcheol is talking with Seungkwan on the phone  while holding two bags full of Seungcheol's favorite snack and drink. You retreat when you see him talking on the phone carefully to not make any sound and close the door as quietly as possible.

"I know, Kwan. I'm always thankful that I have her and Sena in my life. And I'm sorry for not thanking you enough for always being there for me, Kwan." Seungcheol indeed owes Seungkwan a lot in his life. Seungkwan is always there on every step he takes. From nothing up until now. 

He owes him. 

"You better tell Pi Cheolin to give me a raise. Call me if you need anything." Seungkwan ends the call abruptly because he doesn’t want Seungcheol to hear him cry.

Seungcheol knows Seungkwan almost cries, which is why he chose to not call him again. Seungcheol locks his phone, tosses it on the bed and heads to the living room. You greet him with a big smile when he gets out of the room. 

"Is that Seungkwan?" You ask as Seungcheol walks towards you.

"Correct." Seungcheol holds your hand and pulls you closer. 

"Are you feeling better?" You loop your arms around his neck.

"I am." He rests both his hands on your waist. 

"Well, I should thank Jeonghan and Seungkwan for making you feel better." You kiss his cheek before walking back to the kitchen but Seungcheol stops you, he holds your wrist.

"I should thank you first." He whispers as he pulls you gently into him until your body touches each other. 

"Oh? And how would you thank me?" You tease him as you look at him right in the eye. 

“Do you want me to explain it step by step or should I just get into it and let you learn it by action?” Seungcheol says seductively in your ears that sends shivers down your spine. 

A month after the press conference, Seungcheol is already booked and busy. He scores a deal with three big brands where their main target is a family. He also gets dozens of casting calls for TV Dramas, exclusive dramas on streaming platforms, and movies. Everything is going better than he expected but he hasn’t accepted all the offers, because he is taking a break for himself and wants to spend more time with his loved ones.

"Good morning, mama!" Seungcheol kisses your cheek when your alarm blares.

"Morning," You greet him back still with your eyes closed. 

He moves his body so he is spooning you, his leg is on top of your thighs, one hand is inside your clothes. His hands are on top of your breast, cupping your breast while kneading it gently and his thumb brushes your nipple, teasing you. You push your back to him more because you know how this morning will end. Your back hits his morning wood and you intentionally wriggle your back— acting like you are adjusting yourself to be in a more comfortable position.

"Baby? What's that?" He whispers in your ears with his husky voice that makes you clench. 

"What? I didn't do anything." You play dumb with him.

"Hm? Is that so?" He moves his thumb slowly against your nipple again, brushing it lightly and giving it a light pinch that makes you hiss because of how good that feels.

"Did you push your ass on me on purpose?" He asks once again as he pinches your nipple harder than before.

"Yes." You answer in a hushed tone, trying to suppress the moan that almost slips from your mouth.

"How naughty." He licks the back of your ear, an action that makes you shiver and mouth agape.

"I need you." You beg him desperately.

"Anything you want, baby."

His hand that you use as a pillow started to play with your clothed nipple and his free hand made his way down to where you need him the most. He teases you while playing with the band of your pajama pants before his hands creep inside. He starts slowly, making you almost lose your mind, he plays with your folds still with your damp panties on, tracing along the line. 

"You are this wet for me? When I haven’t done anything yet to you?” 

"Yes, only for you."

He pushes your panties aside, his index fingers traced your wet folds before finally finding your clit. He rubs his finger slowly around your clit, a moan that you have been holding finally out from your mouth. A smirk grows on his face as he rubs your clit in a circle slowly, teasing you the way he knows how to make you fold for him. Another moan slips out from your mouth and your breath hitch when Seungcheol's leg that rests on top of you, pushes your legs to open more for him.

"Want you." You say breathlessly, hands clutching the bed sheet. 

"Not so fast, baby." He lowers down your pajama pants and your panties before having you bare.

His fingers move like a work of art, you can't help but hide your face on the pillow to muffle your moan. You gasp loudly when Seungcheol starts to push his finger inside you. It starts with one finger until you ask for more and three fingers now buried deep inside you. He knows you like the back of his hands, he knows your spot, so he purposely thrust his finger deeper and curled it. Your moan is a heavenly tune in his ear, he won't stop until you reach your release.

"I'm close." Your eyes are getting watery because of how good you feel and how close you are from his fingers only.

As he draws you closer, he starts to thrust his hips on your back, humping himself behind you to let you know how hard and desperate he is. You cry his name when your walls clenches around his fingers and you let go your first release on his fingers. He pulls his fingers out, sucks and licks them clean.

"What time is it?" You ask him, panting. You roll to the other side, so you face him. 

"We get forty minutes left before Sena wakes up from her sleep." Seungcheol answers as he glances at the clock on the wall. 

"Okay, cowboy. It's time for me to ride you." You push yourself up and unbutton your pajama top one by one, sensually, while keeping your eyes on your husband. He is watching you with lust in his eyes, both his hands rest behind his head. 

You notice how he gulps hard when you make your way to his hard length. You palm his still clothed length making his mouth gape because of how good you make him feel. A satisfied smirk spreads across your face when you see him like that. You pull his pants down slowly without breaking eye contact with him.

"We are running low on time." You say as you position yourself on top of him, before adding with a wink.

"I'm gonna suck you off till you can't even remember your own name later, tonight."

"Whatever you want, baby." He groans as you push down and takes his length full without warning.

that he got this afternoon. 

"I did! but I guess she knows my trick by now." He drops his legs slowly then with the support of his hands he drops to the ground and rests his head on top of your thighs.

"What are you working on, love?" He asks, popping up his head so he can see what you are working on.

“I’m working on my monthly report. I thought I could get it done this afternoon but sometimes you just want to smash your head with a keyboard then your work can’t be finished.” You explain to him and he looks at you confused, which makes you chuckle because he doesn’t understand it. 

"Why would you want to smash your face with a keyboard? Someone is bothering you at work?" He sits straight up, eyes looking at you with all seriousness. 

"I worked on a wrong report all day." A gasp left from Seungcheol’s mouth, he even covers his mouth dramatically and you let out a laugh because of him. 

"Thank you for providing us." He jokes and that makes you laugh a little bit too loud until you cover your mouth, afraid your daughter will wake up because of it.

Seungcheol is still in his hiatus, he is enjoying his day as a house husband. He drops you off at work and drops Sena to daycare every morning. He goes to the gym right after, sometimes he works out with Wonwoo or sometimes he bothers Seungkwan at work. Seungkwan is back at his dusty work desk because of Seungcheol’s hiatus and he always acts that he hates it every time Seungcheol comes, but secretly he loves it because he has excuses to leave his desk.

Seungcheol also realized a new therapeutic thing, which is grocery shopping. He loves grocery shopping so much and you are the one who is stressing out because he kept on buying unnecessary things. He even signed up for a beginner cooking class. He also realized folding clothes was tiring, then he discovered the Marie Kondo method, so he’s been folding that way and most of the time he failed it. He even started to watch afternoon local TV dramas that have the same pattern over and over again, he complained a lot about it but he can’t stop watching it.

But it always warms your heart every time he tells you about his day and his new favorite things to do because he is enjoying his life. His slower pace life. 

Parents in Sena's daycare understand his position as a public figure, so they never asked him or took his photo. Seungcheol even sends Sena to Chan's house for a play date and having lunch over in their house with Chan's mother. Chan's mother is very talkative and Seungcheol will make sure to give her a backstage pass for their concert because it turns out she is a big fan of Wonwoo. She collected Wonwoo's photo card from their group album.

"Should I send Wonwoo to Chan's house to pick up Sena? I mean that would make Chan's mother happy." Seungcheol asks with a spatula in his right hand.

"Don't you think Chan's mother will pass out if that happened?" You ask back while preparing the plates on the dinner table. 

"Right.. but she paid for my coffee, I should pay her back." You laugh at your husband because he’s been thinking how to pay Chan’s mother back because she paid for his coffee this morning.

Seeing him befriended with Chan's mother gives you reassurance, Chan's mother is always sweet towards you and Sena. She even offers to bring Sena to her house when you can't pick her up from daycare on time.

"Maybe, you could give her a signed album." You try to propose a new idea. 

"She has them." Seungcheol sighs while flipping the rolled omelette. 

"Oh, Sena's birthday is coming up— we should invite Chan, then she can meet with Wonwoo there." You say excitedly and Seungcheol claps his hands together.

"Perfect!" He raises his spatula. You giggle and head towards his side to peck his lips.

Seeing your husband living his ordinary life makes you happy, especially since he can still work on his job that he loves. Maybe after his hiatus ends, he won't have that much time to spend with you and Sena, but you know for sure that his family is always his top priority.

Even in front of the cameras that are still rolling, lighting still on, all the spotlight is on him— you know for sure, he is still the same man you married. The man that you vowed in front of his best friends to spend the rest of your life with till death apart.

"Cheol, I love you."

"I love you more, honey." He leans down to kiss you on the lips and when his lips almost touch yours, 

“AND CUT!” The camera stops rolling and Seungcheol backs away with a little smile. 

“THAT IS PERFECT!” The director walks towards Seungcheol while clapping his hands and the assistant director runs to his direction with a bouquet of flowers for him and his co-star. 

“This adaptation will be a big hit!” The director taps Seungcheol's shoulders. 

“I hope so, sir.” Seungcheol says with a big smile. 

“Break for ten minutes then we’re going to take a staff picture, okay?” The director tells Seungcheol.  

“Yes, sir.” Seungcheol bows his head then walks to his green room. His manager gives him his phone before he enters his room. 

He opens the door, sits himself on the couch. His phone rings right after, with a big smile spread across his face he answers the call. 

“My wife! The shoot is officially done!” Seungcheol lies down on the couch, still with his phone attached to his ear. Seungcheol continues to talk with his wife over the phone until a knock on the door interrupts his conversation. His manager’s head poked behind the door, signaling him to go back to the set for a photo session. 

“Love, I need to go now. See you later at home.” 

Both Mingyu and Seokmin look at each other, talking with their eyes like some kind of sort of telepathy. Seokmin clears his throat and looks at Mingyu one more time before saying the things that he and Mingyu had in their mind.

"You know, there is exactly someone who we think will be suitable for you." Seokmin presses his lips into a thin line.

"Who?" Minghao finally looks up at the two men in front of him.

"You know who." Mingyu says quietly, almost like a hush because Minghao barely heard what the tall man says.

"Who?" Minghao asks again with a demand in his voice.

Seokmin says your name quietly and Minghao rolls his eyes.

"You know, me and her will never ever be a match. We're just too different. Her personality and mine are like water and fire, oil and water—anyway we're just not a match." Minghao explains then back to his phone again.

"She's been in love with you since high school, why don't you give it a try?" Mingyu tries to persuade Minghao again.

"No." Minghao says final.

Both Mingyu and Seokmin shut their mouths after that, they don't want to get an earful from Minghao.

"Look who's coming." Mingyu announces and Minghao sighs hard because he knows very well who is the one coming to their table.

"Hello, Gyu and Min." You greet Mingyu and Seokmin before making your way to the empty chair beside Minghao.

You pull the chair while smiling towards the man who is looking at you like he doesn't want you to be there.

"Hello, Minghao." You greet him but he replies with an eye roll.

"Why are you here?" He asks in a monotone sound.

"I want to meet you." You say directly to Minghao.

"I don't want to."

It's always been like that between you and Minghao. The two of you are friends from high school and you have had a big fat crush on him since high school and you are never ashamed to show it. You always try to get his attention but Minghao always rejects you. He always says that the two of you are opposite of each other.

Minghao loves calmness, structured, composed— something that you are not. You are chaotic, noisy, and talkative. Minghao loves tea and you breathe caffeine. Minghao loves something "bland" and you love everything spicy. Minghao has zero energy to give a fuck and you have the energy to give a fuck.

You are someone out of his type.

"Why are you playing that dating app again? I thought you had a good date last week." You ask curiously.

The thing is, you and Minghao remain friends throughout high school and university, he just doesn't like you when you are trying to approach him for another reason, which is relationship. Minghao dated in the past and of course you never dare to approach him that way when he was dating someone. You know your boundaries.

"She didn't want me— she wanted Mingyu." Minghao points at the tall man who is grinning.

"I want you." You wink at him jokingly.

"I don't want you." He simply says with a forced smile.

"Why are you chasing him? Why don't you try to date someone else?" Seokmin asks you.

The question has successfully made Minghao look at you. He is also curious why you never try to be close with someone else or date someone else. You look just fine and even some of Minghao classmates ask about you.

"Should I?" You ask them but your face turns to Minghao, trying to see his reaction.

"Why are you asking us? You are the one who wants to date, go on." He says fast that it sounds nagging.

"Well, I think you should try to date— You are twenty two and in your last semester. You should try to date someone why you are still in uni." Seokmin convinces you.

"Well, I guess I should accept the invitation then."

"What invitation?" Minghao asks.

"Gyu, do you remember Hansol? Your junior on the football team?" You ask Mingyu and his eyes are widening.

"No way? Did he really ask you out?" Mingyu gasps, dramatically.

"He did, two days ago after I watched your practice. He ran after me when I was heading to my car. He said, He's been asking about me to you and when you confirmed to him that I'm single and not in any weird relationship with you, he asked me out for a date." You explain casually while the three of them looking at you like they didn't believe what they just heard.

"Well, he's been asking about you a lot—like a lot. Hansol is a nice kid. You should go for it." Mingyu supports you and you high five him.

"How about my friend in choir? Do you also want to try? He asked me about you once or twice." This time Seokmin speaks up.

"Your friend? Who?"

Without you noticing, Minghao listens to everything you say about “going on a date” with Mingyu and Seokmin. There is something weird that shifts inside him, something that makes him feel a little uncomfortable.

"Soonyoung, Kwon Soonyoung. He is one year older— great guy. High energy and he will be a great match for you." Seokmin explains.

"Well," You think for a while, even though you are actually waiting for Minghao's response because he's been silent the whole time.

"I will agree on one date. One date with Hansol. One date with Soonyoung." You clasp your hand together, before shaking hands with Mingyu and Seokmin alternately as a form of agreement.

You receive a message from Mingyu. He informs you that he already gives your number to Hansol and he will probably text you soon. Seokmin also calls you in the middle of the night just to confirm once again that you want to try going on a date with Soonyoung to see how it turns out— as you agree, the man cheers but you can clearly hear it that there is someone else cheering, you assume it was Soonyoung.

That night, Hansol sends you a message. He thanked you for agreeing to go on a date with him. He will arrange the date on a Friday night after his football practice. Something weird also happens that night, Minghao, who rarely texts you, sends you a message.

You think it's about a thesis or paper but he randomly asks you about what series you are watching at the moment. You roll on your bed, holding your phone up high. You read his message again, not once, not twice, but thrice. You re-read his message three times because you couldn't believe what he just sent.

"He must be out of his mind." You talk to yourself and your phone falls right into your face. You pick your phone up from your face and accidentally, you press the call button.

"Oh? No no no no!" You are panicking when you realize the call is ringing on the other line.

Just before you end the call, Minghao is picking your call.

"Hello?" His voice rings through your phone.

You sit up straight and put your phone down in the bed, staring at your phone with your mouth agape. Minghao rarely answers your call unless you text him to notify him first.

"Hello? Did you just butt dial me?" His voice slightly annoyed on the other line.

"Hello? Sorry, I didn't butt dial you." You are still in shock because he answers it.

"Did you call me to talk about your current series?" He asks.

"Yes, yes!" You say in panic because you don't have anything else in mind to give excuses.

You open your laptop that is just lying on the nightstand in a hurry. Opening streaming applications randomly to look for their suggested series and Ted Lasso is the one in the top of the recommendation list.

"What do you have in mind?"

"Ted Lasso!" You say half screaming, making you seal your lips tightly right after.

"Well I heard that's a good series but I don't subscribe to Apple TV."

"Well I do!" You say excitedly like you have it when actually you don't subscribe to it.

Your Netflix account? You use your sister's family account.

"Well, maybe I can borrow your account or maybe we can watch it together if you are not that far ahead on the episode."

Your eyes are widening because what the fuck Minghao?

What the actual fuck?

"Yeah, No! I'm not far ahead, I'm just twenty minutes in on the first episode." You lie but who cares.

"Well, should we watch it this Friday?" He suggests.

You really want to say yes but you remember that you have a date with Hansol. You bite your lower lip because you feel puzzled with what to answer. Should you answer it truthfully or should you just straight up lie to him like saying that you need to work on your thesis.

"I'm sorry, I have a date with Hansol—Mingyu's friend from football." You choose option one because there is no harm in saying the truth.

"Oh." He says flatly.

On the other hand, Minghao is lying on his stomach on the bed, one hand holding his phone up to his ear listening to whatever you say. He startled earlier when you called him and said nothing for a few seconds, afraid that you butt dial him but when you finally spoke up, his brain suddenly short circuit. Don't ask him why, because he also doesn't know why.

"So, how about Saturday?" Minghao asks again.

"I guess that will do. I don't have any plans yet for Saturday." You answer and then silence.

Minghao is not muting his phone but he is the one who is mute because his heart is racing. As someone who is calm, Minghao rarely gets heart racing moments unless he is nervous or feeling too happy.

Minghao is not a fool nor too dumb to realize what is the meaning behind his heart racing.

"Hao?" You call him to make sure he is still on the other line.

"Yes, okay. On Saturday then. I need to go now, bye." Minghao ends the call abruptly before you can even bid your goodbye.

"Now I need to subscribe to it and watch the first twenty minutes." You say to yourself and proceed to make a payment to subscribe to Apple TV.

After Minghao ends the call, he turns and lies on his back. Both of his hands clutch the left side of his chest. He is feeling his heart beat that race a little bit too fast then it should be. He looks back at the call log and a small smile appears on his face—to make it clear, he doesn't plan to smile but reflexively both sides of his lips are making a slight curve when he sees the three minutes and twenty eight seconds call with you.

The smiles fade when he remembers what you said earlier. You have a date with Hansol, Mingyu's friend from football. Minghao knows the kid and Minghao can't even hate him because he is a nice kid. Minghao groans because he feels annoyed when he shouldn't be.

Minghao phones chime, he grabs his phone and unlocks it. It is from the group chat consisting of him, Mingyu, and Seokmin. Mingyu talks about Hansol successfully scoring a first date with you, the date will happen after their friday practice. Seokmin joins in too, saying Soonyoung is going crazy because you agreed to go on a date with him. Soonyoung thinking about asking you out on Saturday afternoon, going on a cafe hopping.

"Saturday? Hell nah." Soonyoung says when he reads the chat.

Minghao fingers work like magic, he types fast to tell the guys that you have a date with him— which he deletes right away after he realizes what he writes. He deletes the sentences before swiping his phone to the right, out of the group chat room. Muting the chat for an hour for his inner peace.

Morning comes fast, Minghao is sleep deprived, something that rarely happens to him. Minghao keeps his energy most of the time at the campus, so he can finish his day without feeling too tired but this morning his energy is already low. One, because he is sleep deprived. Two, he feels uneasy every time he remembers your dates with Hansol and Soonyoung.

"Morning, Hao!" You greets him cheerfully with a cup of ice latte in your hands.

"Morning." He greets back with a tone higher than usual and a simple smile.

"Huh? Hao? Are you okay?" You ask because the man greets you with a higher tone and a smile. It never happened before, so it takes you by surprise.

"Me? I am." He points at himself looking confused because of your question.

"Why are you asking me that?" He scratches the back of his ear.

"Did you realize you greet me a tone higher and you smile back at me?"

Minghao stops at his track, his mind rewinds what he said minutes ago. His eyes are widening when he realizes what he just did. He looks at you nervously and you look back at him with concern.

Fuck fuck fuck, Minghao curses internally.

"Hao, it is still nine in the morning and what the hell did you say to her until she looks constipated?" Mingyu says jokingly as he stands in front of the two of you.

"Me? Constipated?" You smack Mingyu arms that make the six foot tall man wince. 

Drama king.

"I haven't had the chance to get my morning coffee, can I drink yours?" Mingyu asks but his hands already make their way to the cup on your hands.

"Even if I say no, you will still take it." You give it to Mingyu and Minghao looks at you and Mingyu alternately.

"Now I can finally function properly." Mingyu says dramatically after he sips the Ice Latte—decaf Ice Latte.

"Can I try it?" Minghao says softly.

All eyes are on Minghao. Mingyu's jaw is on the floor because he doesn't believe what Minghao, the man who loves tea so much— asking to try an Ice Latte.

"I know something must hit your head." You say, looking in disbelief.

"Nothing hits my head and I just want to try something new." Minghao says calmly.

"Here." You give him your ice latte that is almost finished because of Mingyu.

Your breath gets caught on your throat when Minghao leans in to sip it while you hold the cup. Something that never crosses your mind. Even Mingyu, looking back at you, like he doesn’t believe what he just sees.

"It tastes like milk." Minghao leans in and sips it again.

You force a smile at his answer because you are too busy calming yourself inside.

Friday rolls in and you are seated in the bleacher alone, waiting for the football practice to end. Mingyu is the one who insists for you to see the practice because Hansol wants to show off his skills in front of you. Hansol is a great player, he even scores a goal and his teammates including Mingyu run to him, hugging him.

Hansol smiles and waves at you shyly. You wave back at him and his teammates are teasing him. Someone takes a seat beside you, you look to the side and Minghao is sitting beside you. You don't realize but his hair is getting longer and messier.

"You haven't cut your hair." Your hand reaches to the back of his head but stops mid air when you realize what you are doing.

"Haven't had the time yet is my excuse but I'm just too lazy to do it." He says, leaning back and crossing his arms.

"What are you doing here by the way?"

"Mingyu asked me to come and pick him up. His car broke down." Minghao explains.

"Why are you here? Waiting for your date to finish practice? That's not so gentlemanly of him." Minghao snickers.

"First of all, Mingyu is the one who insisted for me to come and watch the practice. Second of all, that boy doesn't even know that I'm coming—here he comes." You smooth your t-shirt and brush your hair with your fingers, trying to look decent.

"Hey," Hansol greets you with a big smile.

His hair is damp because of the sweat and the same goes with his body. The jersey he uses sticks to his skin because of sweat. But the sweat doesn't make his smile fade and the shine in his face is still there.

"Hey," You shyly greet back, ignoring Mingyu who is standing in front of Minghao trying to suppress a squeal.

"Ehm, I don't know what Mingyu told you but thank you for coming and waiting for me. I'm going to shower real quick and meet you at the gate?" He scratches the back of his head, looking nervous but still successfully conversing with you full of confidence.

"Yeah, you can take your time."

"Thank you, see you in a bit!" He turns around and runs down from the bleacher.

"Hao, did you see that?" Mingyu hits Minghao shoulder numerous times while giggling like a teenager.

"See what?" Minghao flatly says.

"Them lovebirds, all cute and shy." Mingyu nudges on Minghao side stomach, earning a side eye from Minghao.

"Oh, I heard Soonyoung is asking you out tomorrow afternoon?" Mingyu asks, he moves to sit between you and Minghao.

"Yeah, but I haven't answered him yet. I have plans for tomorrow with my friend but the time is not exact yet." You explain while stealing glances at Minghao, hoping he will catch what you mean.

"Well, I hope you have a fun date with both of them. I'm going to shower now, wait for me at the front." Mingyu taps Minghao's shoulders before making his way to the back.

"We can watch it tomorrow night, if your date with Soonyoung ends early." Minghao says without looking at you.

"Are you sure?" You ask, facing him.

"Yeah, I need to go to the library in the afternoon." Minghao pushes himself up.

In fact, Minghao doesn’t need to go to the library in the afternoon. The man himself wants to look busy in front of you. He probably will be in his apartment, lying in the bed with his phone on his hand– doom scrolling the social media. 

"Okay, then." You pull your phone out from your pocket to text Soonyoung but Minghao left you.

"Wait!" You grab your bag and run to catch up with him.

"I hope you have a good date tonight." Minghao says softly like a whisper.

"Thanks, Hao." You reply with a genuine smile.

You stand side by side with Minghao at the front gate. Minghao is busy with his phone and you are busy with your own thoughts.

"Look at the skies." Minghao says and it makes you look up to the sky.

"Pretty."

"Yeah, pretty." Minghao validates your words but as he turns his gaze to you, he discovers something prettier. Something he should have discovered a long time ago.

"It looks like a painting with a gradient of orange and red—" You look to Minghao and stop mid sentence because you catch Minghao looking right at you, not at the skies.

"Uh—do you want me to take your picture?" Minghao stutters because he just gets caught red handed looking at you.

"Sure!" You accept his offer happily and walk a little ahead in front of Minghao.

You reach your right hand up, making a peace sign with a big smile on your face. Minghao is squatting down as he takes your photos, he even tells you to do certain poses that fit the vibe.

"She looks so pretty." A voice beside Minghao makes the smile on his face fade.

Minghao looks to the side and finds Hansol there, he is smiling from ear to ear and his eyes are glistening with love.

"The sky helps her." Minghao counters that make Hansol laugh.

"Hey, you're done already?" You wave at Hansol as you walk to them.

"Yeah, I'm not going to let you wait long." Hansol says shyly with both his hands on the front pockets.

"Well, let's go?"

"Right, let's go. See you around, Hao." Hansol taps Minghao's shoulder.

"See you, Hao." You wave at Minghao then walk away with Hansol to his car.

Minghao stands still, looking at you and Hansol walks side by side to his car. The view of you starts to fade as you walk and Minghao wishes that you look back even just for once, he hopes you wave another goodbye or just throw a simple smile but even after you get into Hansol's car, you never look back once.

"Heart broken?" Mingyu says from behind.

"Who? Me?" Minghao turns around while pointing at himself.

"Yeah, you." Mingyu put his index finger on Minghao's chest.

"No way." Minghao brushes Mingyu's finger off him.

"I have a very very good idea." Mingyu says to Minghao with a devilish grin spread across his face and Minghao knows very well that look.

The look that will give him a headache at the end.

Minghao sighs for the tenth time as he drives his car to a burger joint not too far from the campus area. Mingyu in the front seat and Seokmin in the back seat. Minghao's right hand holds his head giving it a little massage along the way because he has actually had enough with whatever the two idiots (re; best friends) planned.

"Why are we suddenly eating at a burger joint? I thought you would let me crash at your house tonight?" Minghao protests.

"My mom doesn't cook tonight but you can crash at my place tonight—and Seokmin suddenly craves a burger, right?" Mingyu asks Seokmin while giving the man a frightening smile.

"Huh? Yeah right. Burger and fries!" Seokmin tries to sound excited as he reads Mingyu's expression.

As they entered the burger joint, the interior caught Minghao's eyes right away. The simple and classic interior with 2000s song play at the speaker, people chattering and laughter, the sound of beer glasses clink with each other gives a very laid back yet comfortable atmosphere.

Minghao eyes scan the whole area and he stops at one spot near the big window. You are sitting across Hansol, burger in your hands and a big laugh out from your mouth. His heart cracks a little, seeing you laugh with someone else. He doesn't like it but he can't do anything about it, so he continued his walk to the table.

"I don't want to sit there." Minghao refuses to sit where he can see you and Hansol interacting all night.

"Just sit there." Mingyu refuses to give up his seat and Seokmin's.

"The two of you will pay a lot for this." Minghao warns them before sitting down.

His eyes are anywhere but your direction.

"I wonder how the date is going." Mingyu says to himself while scrolling his phone, pretending to look for your contact to send you a message.

"Cut the shits, I know what you're doing." Minghao finally speaks up.

The men in front of him freeze for a moment before letting out an awkward laugh because they get caught.

"She never agreed to go on a date— this is like a once in a lifetime moment. We're like her parents that spies on their kids on her first date." Mingyu says quietly.

"I'm still trying to get Soonyoung to spill the cafe but he still refuses to answer." Seokmin says, barely audible.

"Huh?" Minghao asks a little bit too loud that makes them dodge their heads, afraid to get caught.

"Soonyoung still refuse to tell me the cafe where they will have their date— I think that man still looking for the cafe but I'm going to have the cafe name by tonight—"

"Don't. Just don't." Minghao cuts Seokmin off.

"Just let her be." Minghao says before drinking the beer that it should be Mingyu's.

Mingyu and Seokmin stare at each other, talking with their eyes after seeing their best friend gets annoyed for a reason. A reason that is already in front of his eyes but he still refuses to accept it.

"Okay, guess I'm driving tonight." Mingyu says as he takes the soda that it should be Minghao's.

Your date with Hansol is a big success. Hansol looks like someone who is awkward at first but as you talk with him, he is such a fun person and easy to talk with. His knowledge about things surprises you a lot, him and his knowledge with so many facts in this world.

"So, I heard you never go on a date before?" Hansol asks as he puts down his chocolate milkshake.

"Well, not entirely wrong. I think I have been on a date before but not for a romantic purpose—is this date for a romantic purpose?" You ask to make sure and Hansol laughs.

"Of course, I've been wanting to ask you out ever since I saw you at football practice. I asked Mingyu but he said you are in love with someone else." Hansol takes a napkin and gives it to you because your fingers are greasy after taking the fries.

"That is also quite right, I was in love with someone since high school but it's always on and off. So, I'm thinking why should I wait for him any longer?" You slurp your vanilla milkshake after.

"But let me be clear first, I'm going on a date with someone else tomorrow. I agree with Mingyu and Seokmin to try and go on a date with their friends." You inform him.

"Well, fair enough I guess? We just know each other and we still don't know where this will lead us—just so you know, you can comfortably tell me if you feel you are more in line with him. I'm not going to be mad, maybe a little heart broken but it's fine. But if you want to go on a second date— I'm more than happy to take you."

Your lips are curving, making a warm small, even your heart warms after hearing Hansol. 

"Thank you," You raise your milkshake glass and Hansol does the same.

"No, thank you." He says as he clinks his glass with yours.

And Minghao witnessed everything.

"Afternoon, Soonyoung." You greet the man who has been waiting in the cafe since an hour ago.

"Afternoon, you look so pretty." The words slip out of Soonyoung's mouth without his intention to say it— it should stay on his mind.

"Thank you and you look handsome too." You take a seat in front of him.

"Did you wait too long?" You ask.

"No, I just got here." Soonyoung lies through his teeth.

Soonyoung is too damn nervous to go on a date with you. He couldn't even sleep last night and keeps bothering Seokmin all night long. He wakes up too early, goes to the gym in the morning, gets himself ready, and drives to the cafe one and half hours earlier.

"I thought I was late." You say as you look at the watch on your wrist.

"No, you are fifteen minutes early." Soonyoung grins.

"And you are way earlier than me." You say shyly.

You talk with Soonyoung in the cafe for about two hours. The conversation flows easily because he is so similar to you. Your energy matches him really well like a twin flame but you know, he will be a good friend for you but not romantically.

"Well, I feel like we are really similar to each other. What Seokmin said was true after all." You say as the two of you walk away from the cafe.

"But I think we're much more compatible as a friend, Soonyoung. Platonically not romantically." You say apologetically.

"Hey, I actually want to say the same but I'm afraid that it's just me thinking— I'm really glad that we are on the same boat." Soonyoung says and his face shows how relieved he is.

"Thank you, Soonyoung for taking me on a date."

"No, thank you for trying to go on a date with me." His eyes soften as he looks at you.

"Can I hug you?" Soonyoung asks.

"Of course, friend!" You pull the man into a hug and he giggles.

You bid your goodbye to Soonyoung as you walk into a different direction. The cafe is not too far from Minghao's apartment, so you walk to his apartment without telling him.

"Oh?" You find him entering a convenience store.

You follow him to the convenience store and he is standing in front of the instant noodle section, his eyes are gazing at the rack, he bites his lower lips. He is thinking hard just to choose a pack of instant noodles.

"I recommend you to choose the Shin's." You say with a smile, taking him by surprise.

"Oh? Your date?" Minghao asks, confused.

"Already done." You say with a smile. Your hand reaches out to take your favorite instant noodle brand.

"Bad date?" Minghao asks, his hand also reaching out to take the same instant noodle as you.

The two of you circle the instant noodle aisle to check the ready to eat aisle. He follows you from behind, quietly but making sure that you know his presence behind you.

"It's a fun date actually," You say as you stop in front of the dried seaweed rack.

Your eyes are scanning the entire rack, thinking hard about what seaweed brand to eat with the instant noodle. Minghao stands beside you, fingers between his chin like he is thinking hard to choose dried seaweed brand.

"Then why are you ending the date early?" Minghao is curious about your date even though he doesn't want to show it, but he can't hide the fact that he is curious.

"We thought we were better as friends." Your hand reaches out to the top shelf to pick the dried seaweed but Minghao helps you to pick it.

He is so close to you until you can smell his cologne. He doesn't pick it right away, he looks down at you, eyes meeting yours. The proximity between the two of you makes his heart race. He gulps nervously when he notices you steal a glance at his lips. You step away nervously and Minghao picks the seaweed right away while clearing his throat to ease the awkwardness that seems to leave.

You are sitting on the couch, waiting for Minghao to finish cooking the instant noodles. Your eyes scan his apartment. His apartment is neat, tidy, and artsy— something that screams Xu Minghao. You stand on your feet, walk towards a shelf made of glass. There are tea sets inside, something that you don't understand but you appreciate the beauty.

"What are you doing?" Minghao asks softly as he makes his way to stand beside you.

Your shoulder touches his arms because he is standing so close to you. The space in this apartment is big, yet he decides to stand close to you. The awkward feeling starts to get thicker and clearer. None of you open your mouth to ease the awkward.

"Hao," You call him, head turns to look at him.

It feels like a scene from a movie when Minghao turns his head to you in slow motion, he looks down just a little to lock his gaze with you. Minghao can't help but to drag his gaze slowly like he is capturing every feature of your face to his memory until he stops at your lips. He doesn't hide it when he stares at your lips longer than he intends to.

"Hao," You whisper his name like it is a secret that nobody can hear.

"Hm?" He hums softly as he drags his gaze to meet your eyes again, he looks at you with softness in his eyes.

"Why?" You ask barely making any sound, eyes keep locking with him.

"I like you." He let out a shaky sigh after saying what he needed to say.

Something that has been bothering him every time he sees you and it is way worse when he doesn't see you. All he can think is you. You, who is a total opposite from him.

"I don't know how and when but I know for sure that I like you." Minghao says once again, his hands reach the side of your face. His thumbs stroke your cheek softly.

Last night, Minghao slept at Mingyu house with Seokmin. The three of them continue their talk while drinking whiskey— Mingyu's father's whiskey to be exact. They talked for hours like until the sun was almost up. Half tipsy, Minghao confessed to his best friends about his feelings towards you. About how he always denied the feelings.

Seokmin and Mingyu know, they purposely talk to you about the date in front of him, to make Minghao realize his own feelings.

But Minghao doesn't think the confession will come out from his mouth this fast.

"Five years," You say as you look deep into his eyes.

"I have liked you for five years." You continue. You hold the side of his clothes, clutching it like you are holding on for dear life.

"I'm sorry for making you wait for so long." Minghao rests his forehead on yours, the tip of your nose touching each other. He closes his eyes, he lets out a sigh of relief.

"Are you going to kiss me?" You ask, pulling your head a little away from him.

"Do you want me to?" He teases you.

You roll your eyes, letting go of your hands clutching the side of his t-shirt and turn away. You do not even fully turn away when he grabs you by your wrist, pulling you gently towards him— hands cupping the sides of your face. He throws a soft smile before he pulls you into a kiss.

His lips stay there for awhile, he doesn't make a move and neither did you. Your hands hold his arm tightly because your knees have grown weaker with just lips touching each other. Minghao starts to move his lips slowly, like he is tasting the water first but when you reply to his movement, he starts to move bolder. You can feel how his hands that cupping the side of your face shakes a little just like you when you wrap your arms around his neck.

"Choose me." Minghao says as he pulls from the kiss.

"You are not an option, Hao. You are always my answer."

"Gosh, I'm such a fool." He pulls you into another kiss.

The kiss is bolder now. Minghao doesn't even hesitate to have his hands roam on your back down to your waist. He squishes your waist gently that makes you part your lips, he takes the opportunity to slip his tongue inside. Your tongue fights with him for dominance and you hear him groan lowly.

You lightly push him away to catch your breath, he is panting and he never leaves his eyes from you. A smile curves on your face before you chuckle right after, feeling shy after what just happened. Minghao is no different from you, his face is getting red as he scratches the back of his head awkwardly.

"So, are you busy tonight?" He asks while playing with his fingers trying to ease the nervousness.

"Depends, why are you asking?" You raise one eyebrow, suppressing a smile that forms on your lips.

"I want to take you on a date— one date." You chuckle and push him to the side. You make your way to the couch and tap the empty space beside you.

"I'm quite busy tonight because my dear friend asked me to watch a series with me. Should I cancel him and go out with you instead?" You tease him.

"Well, I believe, you should go watch the series with him then tomorrow afternoon, you can go out with me." He doesn't sit beside you. He cages you instead.

Both of his hands are on your side, body leans toward you until your face is inches apart from him.

"Well, does the date include you kissing me or no?" You can't help it but to stare at his lips the whole time while talking and teasing him.

"Depends, do you like my kiss or no?" Minghao leans to your right ear, whispering it seductively that successfully makes you shiver right down to your spine.

"I like it, love it so much. I don't know if you are a good kisser." You play the same game as him, you peck the side of his mouth.

"Oh? Do you want me to kiss you again?" He wriggles his eyebrows and he leans even closer to you and your back hits the back cushion.

"Well, I don't let any random guy kiss me unless he is my boyfriend."

"Hello, girlfriend." He smiles before pressing his lips back to your lips.

"Oh? We're a couple now?" You push him and he plops himself on the side.

"Yes, now please kiss me again, girlfriend." He pulls you to his laps.

"Five years of knowing you, I never knew that you were a horny teenager." You wrap your arms around his neck while he pulls you closer by the waist.

"I am a horny teenager inside— I'm just good at hiding it." He jokes that successfully make you laugh out loud.

"Girlfriend, can we continue?"

"Yes, boyfriend."