“I can’t fall asleep.” You still can't get used to his raspy voice that he has whenever he's tired. this wasn't the first time he had come over to your apartment when he was tired and you were so sure it wasn't going to be his last. You gestured for him to sit next to you on your bed. He crawled into your bed and laid his forehead on your shoulder. “But I’m so tired.” It came out as a whisper and sounded almost as if he was telling himself rather than telling you. 

He had once told you that you were the most comforting person he’s ever met. A part of you wondered if that was why he always looked for you whenever he felt troubled. These days, his trouble is that he can’t fall asleep on his own. He has been overworking himself and refuses to listen to you whenever you tell him to rest or just take a break for the sake of his own health. He looked exhausted regardless of the time of the day but somehow found himself struggling to fall asleep. 

“Do you wanna cuddle?” The question takes the both of you by surprise. His late night visits always lead to you two cuddling but you’ve never actually asked him to cuddle. And honestly, he never expected you to ask. “Can we?” He’s looking at you now, with the softest smile that one could possibly imagine and something about it makes you realise that late night visits somehow makes you realise things that you probably shouldn’t realise.

You let him rest his head on your chest as you both hug each other. “Do you wanna talk about what’s bothering you? Maybe talking it out would help you fall asleep?” Cheol just shakes his head. “Let’s just cuddle. I don’t really feel like talking about work right now.” And so, you both just sit in the silence as you stroke his hair. You’ve found that it works wonders at putting people to sleep. It worked well the last couple of times Cheol visited your apartment and you were hoping it’ll work today too.

But do friends really do this? Falling asleep while cuddling was something you could never imagine doing with your other friends. Cheol was always the first person to say that you two are best friends but you weren’t really sure if that’s how you truly saw him. He always set himself apart from your other friends and his late night visits made it all the more difficult to see him as “just a friend”. Telling him how you felt would probably cause more problems, so you settle on keeping it to yourself.

You snap out of your thoughts when you feel Cheol move, his face now inches away from yours. “YN?”

“Yeah?” You both make eye contact with each other for a little longer than a moment before he snuggles his face into the crook of your neck. “I asked a question.” He doesn’t repeat the question though, forcing you to have to admit that you didn’t hear the question.

You feel your body temperature rise when you feel him smiling against your neck. “i asked,” he pauses, somehow finding this amusing. “I asked, what are we?” You stop to actually think about it. What are you two really? To say you’re just friends would be an obvious lie and the fact that he was asking just meant that maybe he felt the same way as you. He smiles again, looking at you as you contemplate your answer. 

“It’s ok. You can be honest.” His whisper against your skin sends a shiver down your spine. You try to regulate your breathing as you feel your heart hammering against your chest. Cheol laughs softly. “Not funny, Cheol.”

“Have you never wondered why I always look for you? You’re the only one who makes me feel safe to be all that I am, YN.” He sounds serious but also half asleep. “I honestly don’t think I can be just friends with you.”

A part of you knew this was where his question was leading up to but to actually hear him say it kinda threw you off guard. You knew what your response to him would be but it somehow was difficult to say it out loud. Almost as if he heard your thoughts, Cheol tells you to take your time to answer. It almost feels wrong to make him wait for an answer though. "I like you." Your confession takes you by surprise. You didn't exactly think through what you were going to say even though you knew you felt the same. 

 "Hyung, you should just give up at this point." His friend, Soonyoung had tagged him along. Soonyoung joined Seungcheol on his library trip once last week and had heard about how someone had been hogging the study room and how Seungcheol was determined to find out who it was. He decided to follow Seungcheol to the library once again today in hopes that something might change. 

"There's a lot of other rooms in this awfully large place to study in. why do you need to book that room?" 

"because it's the best room in this library." stubborn. god he was so stubborn.

The first thing I loved about him; how stubborn he is and how he makes sure he gets what he wants. 

"Hey Soon, hey Soon's friend," a deep voice snuck up from behind, almost making Seungcheol scream. Almost. "I'd like to check these out!" he plopped a couple of books onto the counter that Seungcheol & Soonyoung were standing in front of. "Hey Wonwoo! Hyung, Wonwoo. Woo, Seungcheol hyung." The boy introduced his friends to each other. 

He then told Wonwoo about the study room situation, earning a sigh from Ms Oh. "You come here everyday to ask me the same thing and I guarantee you my answer will probably stay the same for as long as she studies in this university." 

she? 

Wonwoo looks over to Seungcheol, "I heard the ghost of Noria haunts that room." Seungcheol raises an eyebrow. 

The ghost of Noria?

Well now this is interesting. Seungcheol had heard of the existence of this "ghost" but he hadn't heard much about them. He questions Wonwoo about this "ghost". Soonyoung & Wonwoo explain to him about how there's a girl in their course who no one really knows. 

She attends every class but disappears the moment the class ends. She's said to be a straight A's student with a 4.0 GPA. No one has really heard her voice. She does have friends though. Doyeon, a korean-australian student, Minnie, a Thai exchange student, Jun, a Chinese exchange student and Chan, the head of the International Student Union for their year. It’s assumed that this “ghost” is an international student based on her friends. Her friends often answer on her behalf. The 3 other people that have worked with her had mentioned that despite the fact that she’s super quiet, she did in fact carry their group to a distinction. During exam seasons, she semi lives in the library to get as much studying as she possibly can get done.  

Seungcheol himself was a straight A student but he realised that he was never dedicated as much as she is. This just made him all the more interested in meeting her. He told himself that he’ll come back again tomorrow as the 3 of them made their way over to the campus cafeteria. 

10am

Seungcheol packed his bag and made his way to the library. He was determined to at least see her if she was still in that study room. The librarian once again told him that the room was booked. At that moment, he heard a few voices coming towards him. Ms Oh glared to the side, signalling them to quiet down. Seungcheol recognised one of them. Chan. That boy happened to be in a couple of Seungcheol’s classes and they were some sort of acquaintances. Along with Chan were 2 girls, all dressed in sweatshirts. A very common attire during the exam season. 

“What time did she come here today?” One of the girls asks Ms Oh, to which she responds, “7.30.” The time that the library opens. Ms Oh then turned over to Seungcheol, “If you have any questions, these are the people you should ask.” It took a moment for him to realise what she meant. They are her friends. The girl turns around to look at Seungcheol and then back to face Ms Oh. “Eh?” 

“You’re friends of the ghost of Noria?” Seungcheol questions them. These girls must be the Doyeon and Minnie that Soonyoung mentioned. The girl slowly turned back around with a smug look on her face. “Yeah. Why?” 

“She’s been hogging that damn study room for like 3 weeks.”

“4, actually. And today is your lucky day, my dude.” A boy walked into the library holding soy milk and a sandwich. That must be Jun. “No food in the library!” Ms Oh gave the boy a stern look to which he just shrugged and said “gotta feed our ghost.” 

“Don’t call her the ghost of Noria in front of her though. She doesn’t like the attention it gives her. I’m Doyeon, by the way.” The girl at the counter introduced herself before she left with her friends to get their friend out of that room. 

Chan slowly opened the door of the study room. There were textbooks, notebooks and other study material laid out on the table. “You know you can’t just stay here everyday. It’s almost as if you’re living here.” You look up as you hear your friend sigh at the sight of you. “But I’m not living here. I still go back to my dorm every night.” 

Jun plopped down the packet of soy milk and sandwich that he was holding. “At least eat something.” You look over to Doyeon who opens her mouth to say something, just to get smacked in the arm by Minnie. “Were you gonna say something?” You ask her, avoiding the glare from Minnie. 

“You might have a secret admirer.” She blurts out. Chan dramatically turned around to look at Do. “I’m pretty sure that’s not what he meant!” Jun just shakes his head, leaving you to wonder what Doyeon was on about. You made a good effort at avoiding attention. So good that the fact that you avoid attention was what gave you any sort of attention. You having any secret admirers was not a concept you ever thought you had to deal with. “I’m sure it’s just a misunderstanding,” you say looking at Doyeon. 

Seconds pass before you hear something outside of the room door that wasn’t fully closed. The door opened a little more and a head popped in. “So, you’re the one that’s been hogging this room?” His voice sounded almost like a cold whisper. Minnie slaps her hand over Doyeon’s mouth to stop her from whatever she was about to say. 

Seungcheol?

“Give us a few minutes. We’ll drag her out soon.” Jun chimes in, hoping to take any attention away from the girls. 

“Drag me out?!” You say a little louder than you wish you did. It wasn’t uncommon for you to be loud around your friends except it wasn’t just your friends who were here. He was here too. 

“You’ve been living here for 4 weeks.” Chan says with yet another exasperated sigh. 

“No! I’ve been going home everyday. All I’m doing is just finding a conducive place to study and that place happens to be here.” You silently cursed yourself for how you put that across. It was true but you could’ve been a little more mindful of the fact that there was someone else in the room.

The first thing I loved about her; she knew how to be assertive. She just didn’t want to. 

________________________________

“Hyung, is everything alright?” Soonyoung noticed his older friend looking very spaced out. Jeonghan, Joshua, Wonwoo and Soonyoung were having a conversation about their previous class with Wonwoo and Soonyoung questioning the older guys how they felt about this faculty given that this was an extra credit class for them. Seungcheol, on the other hand, was quietly eating, and not engaging in the conversation. It took Seungcheol a while to realise that the question was directed to him.

“Hm? Oh yeah, I’m fine.”

“That is definitely a very convincing answer.” Jeonghan remarks. 

“Oh right. How was working with Ms Ghost?” Wonwoo questions, earning a quizzical look from Joshua. 

“Her name is Y/N and she probably hates me.” Seungcheol doesn’t bother looking up from his plate. 

“Mr Has Everyone’s Heart failed to get his crush’s heart?” Soonyoung jokes. Seungcheol kicks his chair ever so slightly for his comment.

“Am I the only one who doesn’t understand?” Joshua asks. Wonwoo and Soonyoung explain the whole library story to Joshua and Jeonghan and mention that they both believe he has a crush on her.

Seungcheol quietly explains what happened in class. “Why did I even ask her to be the assistant leader when quite literally everyone else would’ve been down for it?” He also remarked on the fact that you and Chan pretty much held hands for a good amount of time before the lesson started. He honestly didn’t believe he even liked you enough to consider it a crush. He was more likely intrigued by you if anything. 

You were one who found the quiet comforting. However, the silence right now, felt almost deafening. It’s been an hour since the 3 of you got to the cafe. The conversation from earlier had died down and the 3 of you were sitting in silence. You had gone over the recent event so many times in your head so much so you were sure you could recite the day and its events in your sleep. 

Now what? You wondered. You somehow found an enemy, got asked to be the assistant leader of your group by Mr Has Everyone’s Attention and 2 of your friends now know that you knew the guy from the library.

The buzz of your and Chan’s phone pulls you back into reality. It’s a message from Ryujin.

Ryujin: So when do you guys want to meet up to do this assignment?

You glance over to Chan to see him typing up a response. "Hey Y/n, is it ok if I say we're both free on the weekend and Wednesday?" Chan asks and you nod. 

The both of you had the same schedule. On Wednesdays, you both only had 1 online class which you didn't need to be actively present for. You just had to do the class's quiz before the next scheduled class for the attendance to count. You didn't have anything on the weekends and neither did Chan.

Chan: y/n & i are free on wednesday & the weekend!

Yuna: we're free on wednesday too!

Yuna responds to Chan's message almost instantly, indicating that she & Ryujin would be able to meet on Wednesday. 

Now you both wait for Seungcheol's response. Jun notices the way you tense up when you see that Seungcheol is typing and chuckles. "For someone who isn't interested, you seem to care too much about him," he puts a slight emphasis on the him.

Cheol: yeah I'm free on Wednesday too

Ryujin: great! I'll book a study room at the library and send the details in a bit.

Wednesday.

Doyeon practically drags you out of bed after your alarm rings for the second time. Chan had told her to make sure you don’t make an excuse to avoid having to go to the meeting. Not that you would have skipped or anything but just as a safety measure. She was up earlier than you working on an assignment and hearing you snooze your second alarm made her question whether or not you were going to skip. You weren’t intending on skipping but the thought of having to go was making you dread the day before it even started. 

You got ready and made some coffee before heading out. Chan had told you earlier that he would drop by your room to pick you up so that you could go to the library together. You managed to finish your coffee before Chan got to your dorm so you both decided to drop by the cafe to get a drink before heading out to the library. Somehow the both of you managed to be early so you decided to have a chat with Ms Oh before going up to the room that Ryujin booked. 

You were hoping that the girls would come in before Seungcheol did for the sake of your own sanity. Just as you had wished, Ryujin and Yuna were already in the room when you and Chan walked in. Yuna greets the both of you and you both greet her back. Seungcheol makes it into the room just in time. Ryujin suggests the group does the assignment together instead of splitting the parts to get to know one another's working style better. 

Ryujin, Yuna and Seungcheol seem to be the kind to talk out any ideas and thoughts they have. You and Chan started taking pointers from their conversations in a shared document and making references to notes that back up their points. Chan occasionally voiced out his points and the notes both of you were taking. When there were questions raised on topics they didn't fully understand, you found answers and explained it to them in the best way you could. This led to Seungcheol directing his questions to you. At first you thought he was just raising questions and directing them to you because you were looking up the answers. But as time went by, it became clear that he wasn’t raising questions he didn't know the answers to. To be able to form such questions, you need to have thorough knowledge of the topic. And then it strikes you. He wasn’t asking because he didn’t understand. He’s asking because it gets you to talk more than you were. You see Yuna and Chan diligently taking notes from your answers and Seungcheol’s questions. 

You tried your best to avoid looking at Ryujin in fear of what her reaction might be. Yuna, on the other hand, didn’t seem too bothered over the fact that you had Seungcheol’s undivided attention. Yuna seemed comfortable taking notes with Chan and it now seemed to be her turn to have small discussions with Chan in the shared document. All discussions soon came to an end after the team gathered all of the necessary information. All that was left was to write out all of the notes into proper answers for your assignment questions. Each of you picked a question to tidy up and once you were done, you did a quick scan through of all the answers to make sure there were no spelling errors. 

“Great work everyone!” Yuna seemed a lot more cheery today than she had during your first encounter. Ryujin, however, looked even grumpier than you remembered. All of you pack your bags and get ready to leave. Ryujin picks up a conversation with Seungcheol as the group exits the room and Yuna strolls behind with you and Chan. 

“So, are you two dating?” Yuna asks. You almost spit out the last bit of coffee you were drinking. 

“What? No.” Chan looks equally as shocked as you. 

"Ah. I just wanted to ask since you know, you two seem very close and you were both holding hands for a good chunk of our class on Monday." 

"Oh, no, we're just best friends and the holding hand bit is just something that helps to ground me when my anxiety gets bad." You say, hoping to clarify the situation. Yuna giggles a little. 

As you approach the front desk, you hear Ms Oh. “So you two met?”

Seungcheol turns around to look at you and smirks a little, “Yeah, we did.”

Ms Oh explained to you that Seungcheol spent 3 weeks trying to book the room you were in and on the last day he checked, he happily left without saying anything. 

“There’s literally a 100 other rooms in this library and probably a 100 more in the library on the other side of the campus.” Ryujin remarks. 

“Yeah, but that was the room I wanted to book.”

You could practically see the dark cloud forming over Ryujin’s head. Yuna runs up to Ryujin and tells the group they have another meeting to attend to and practically drags Ryujin out of the library. 

The first thing I hated about him is that he knows how to be an ass.

You find yourself back where you were initially seated but this time, in between Chan and Seungcheol instead of Doyeon. The Professor had told everyone to find seats once they grouped up and Seungcheol suggested you take a seat at the back of the class. There were 2 girls who were seated to Seungcheol’s right and were ogling him. The both of them also had the number 3 on their paper and followed you all upon hearing Seungcheol asking around for anyone with the number 3. 

Chan was still holding onto your hand. You had no intention of letting go though, especially with how awkward the air above you was. Chan and Doyeon often took turns helping to ground you whenever you got anxious and now it was Chan’s turn to help. 

The girl with a wolf cut spoke first, breaking the silence. “My name is Ryujin. It’s nice to meet you all. Especially you.” she said while looking at Seungcheol. You see him purse his lips while nodding slightly. The girl next to her then introduced herself, also openly admitting that she’s a fan of his. Yuna. You realised that while Jeonghan and Joshua entertained their fans, Seungcheol never really bothered. 

Chan introduces himself next, leaving you and Seungcheol to introduce yourselves. You look at him and he looks at you, both of you waiting for the other to speak first. Chan gives your hand a squeeze and you decide to break the silence. “I’m Y/N. Nice to meet you all.” You see Seungcheol smile a little and Ryujin’s face goes cold when she notices it too.

“I’m Seungcheol, but you all probably already knew that.” He says with a little bit of arrogance painting his voice. 

The class quiets down for a bit as everyone settles down in their groups. The Professor, Professor Seo, finally started his lesson. The lesson was pretty easy to follow granted that you had already looked up all the study material needed for all of your classes. You could occasionally hear Ryujin and Yuna giggle but for the most part, the lesson went by pretty quietly. You were focused on the lesson and were periodically helping Chan when he needed help. When the lesson started, you mentally put up a wall between you and Seungcheol, which by the way, was something you were good at, in order to focus. You were not intending to put down your mental wall until the lesson ended. 

And soon, the lesson did end. Before ending, Professor Seo gives the class a mini assignment. Seungcheol asks the group if anyone wants to set up a group chat to discuss our assignments and Ryujin offers to set it up. You all end up giving your phone numbers to her. 

“Do you want to be the group leader?” Chan asks Ryujin. You do need to put someone’s name as the leader and since Ryujin is setting up the group chat, Chan decided to ask her.

She looks at Chan and then looks at Seungcheol. “I think Seungcheol should be the leader.”

He takes a moment to think about her offer. And then he looks at you. “Only if Y/N agrees to be the assistant leader,” he says, leaving Yuna baffled and Ryujin seething with anger. A moment of awkward silence fills the air. Surprisingly, Ryujin is the one to break the silence. 

“So are you going to agree or not?” There’s a hint of spite in her voice, making you aware of the fact that you might have accidentally made an enemy on your first day of your second year. You realise that neither of the answers you give would pacify her so you decide to actually take up the offer. You end up taking yourself, and Chan, by surprise with your answer. 

“Oh my god I’m an idiot!” 

You’re back at the cafe where you started your morning but this time, only with Jun and Chan. You have a 3 hour break and decided to come back to the cafe for lunch solely to avoid having to see Seungcheol and his friends as well as Ryujin and her friends. Minnie and Doyeon’s schedules were different from the 3 of you which is why they weren’t at the cafe. 

After the incident in class, Seungcheol’s friends showed up and you couldn’t ask him why he wanted you to be the assistant leader of the group. Ryujin packed her stuff and left with Yuna while sulking, leaving you to finally process what just happened. Jun had walked up to the both of you and Chan suggested going back to the cafe knowing that you wouldn’t want to be on campus grounds after what just happened. Chan quietly briefed Jun on what had happened in class. 

“So why did you say yes?” Jun asks.

“I don’t know! The pressure? The fact that Ryujin looked like she was going to murder me regardless of what I said? I don’t know.” You put your head into your palms, trying to gather yourself. 

“Maybe you can use this to help you fight your fear?” Jun suggests, though he knew it wouldn’t be a good idea.

“Are you kidding? It’s already bad enough that I have to be in a group with him AND he wants me to be his assistant?! I made an enemy, EN. NE. MY. because of his stupid little remark. I did not spend an entire year making myself invisible just for Mr Has Everyone’s Attention to ruin it!” 

Your response leaves both Jun and Chan wide eyed.

“You know him?” Chan questions you.

It was at this moment when you realised that while you were externalising your anger, you might have accidentally acknowledged the fact that you knew him. 

“Do. Not. Tell. Doyeon.” You briefly go over how you know him without mentioning that you once found him attractive. It took Chan and Jun awhile to process the fact that you knew the guy from the library and yet you didn’t say anything about it. 

“Ok but what if he knew you from that class? It’s kind of obvious if there’s only one person who’s more interested in running out of the class than trying to flirt with him.” Jun suggests.

“Yeah, right. What is this, a romance book?” Chan scoffs.

Did I make a mistake?