#chenfordweek

Chenford Week 2022 → Day 1

Enjoy my submission for Day One of Chenford Week 2022!

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Lucy has spent weeks planning her first night home from undercover. She’d had to give up so much of herself, so many of the creature comforts that built her routines, that thinking about those missing parts had become its own sort of solace. She never said a word about it, not even to Tim, but she spent countless nights thinking about her favorite pajamas, the fuzzy blanket that lives at the foot of her bed even though it used to be Jackson’s, the warmth of a mug of peppermint tea cradled between her hands.

She’s missed it, missed the quiet, gentle habits, the ways she gets to connect with herself at the end of every day.

So as soon as they’re debriefed, as soon as she’s parted ways with Tim in the parking garage, Lucy sets about finding herself again. She takes the long way home, listening to her favorite songs and driving through the parts of LA she hasn’t seen since before the op. When she gets back to the apartment, she and Tamara order Thai for dinner and spend the evening watching cheesy romcoms.

Then the clock strikes 11, and for the first time in almost three months, Lucy gets ready for bed without worrying that drug runners are going to wake her up in the middle of the night. She savors her cup of tea, relishing in the smooth minty flavor. Even though it’s still summer, she finds her coziest socks and pairs them with her favorite sweater, turning on the fan so she can tuck herself underneath the covers.

The fan whirs quietly in the background, muffling the edges of the sitcom she’s streaming from her phone, just enough to break up the silence, screen dimmed and face down on the nightstand.

It should be a perfect night, the kind of easy rest she’d learned to forgo but longed to get back.

So why can’t she fall asleep?