#chartblogs

You’re going to depend on Guardian Angel/Angelic Descent a LOT. Which means you have to depend on your teammates. I’m not sure which DPS you main, CJ, I know some of them work better alone, but you need to stay with your team and preferably behind them. 

You really should not focus on fighting at all unless it’s safe or someone has you alone but most of the time you are going to die when  you’re cornered with an enemy unless they’re already dangerously low. I routinely have 0-2 eliminations per match maximum. 

Ontop of healing your teammates when they’re low you also want to predict when a teammate is going to take damage, this will prevent them from dying while they’re finishing out a fight or when someone gets the jump on them and you saw it before them. You really really really have to make sure you don’t get jumped because you will be the focus of team fights. Sometimes you’ll get lucky and they’ll be so focused on taking out that DPS/Tank they’ll completely ignore you healing them the whole time lmao (those are my favorite.) 

Don’t be afraid to attack boost, it can be the difference and take the pick you need to move in/keep going. I’d say you need to shoot for at least 10 offensive assists per game as opposed to defensive assists (kills teammates have gotten while being healed.) Damage boosting also helps ult charge, so for example, pocket this Zarya for a bit to help her get Grav. Pocket that baby DVA so she can recall her mech faster, etc. 

When prioritizing healing, when choosing between tanks and DPS, I try to make sure tanks are at least half health and then immediately healing DPS, since their health pool is average it only takes a couple seconds to heal them and then you can go back to the tank. It’s also a massive boost to your own ult.

When resurrecting...be careful. I’ve done stupid things, and it’s common to die while resurrecting if you’re hellbent on resurrecting every kill that happens when Rez is up. Don’t fly in the middle of a team fight to resurrect the soul inbetween the entire enemy team. I’ve managed it before but it’s really not worth it unless you’re sure you can immediately fly to an ally far enough. Not only that, but since you’re bringing a teammate back in the middle of the enemy team, you’re more or less leaving them to the wolves. I’d say don’t try those cheeky rezzes unless you’re sure you can stay with them for a bit to keep them alive and back to the rest of your team. When rounds are 4 minutes long, for example, don’t waste thirty seconds for nothing. 

As for Valk, it takes some getting used to. I’ve learned to use it  as both a defensive ult and as an offensive ult. For now, if you have Rez up, you get one extra pocket Rez for Valk, and your original cooldown is still going. Make sure you get the high ground and quickly, make sure your team stays together. It can be used to defend points as well as make offensive pushes/cinch the team fight to take a point on an escort/KOTH etc. Again here, don’t be afraid to attack boost.

Be careful when ulting if you can’t ensure you’ll survive a second after, else you’ll waste the whole ult. Watch out for High Noon, Attack Visor, Self Destruct, Whole Hog, Rip-Tire, Death Blossom, and in higher ranks, Configuration: Tank. These are the ults that kill me the most. Especially that fucking Tire. If you hear it and you’re already in Valk, get as high up as you can. Death Blossom is actually a dome so unless you’re already very high up you can’t really avoid it. I’ve tried. You’re also pretty deadly like this so if your team is ok  but having issues with a Phara, take her the fuck out.

"Weird about gender pronouns". WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN??

my best guess is they likely found a post about me being against neopronouns because they make a mockery of the trans community and aren’t valid.

Where did the enemies go? Or did everyone literally fuck off from the match???

The enemies never even got near it, the rest of my team fucked off at random points across the map and kept picking them off. It wasn’t even coordinated, just random. No one else was on it, so I figured “ok, i’m not healing anyone unless they come to payload” and sat on it. 

That is the most dad joke I've ever heard.

wtf

You may know this person. He was friends with devon dodge. I think same year graduation as him. Blond hair down to at least his chin. All I remember about him.