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I needed/wanted to go to the coffee shop this a.m. and work on a to-do list and also I am having a hard time rn that involves trying to communicate with my parents (lol) so i alsp decided to do a little pre-therapy journaling while im here..
unfortch now im just having trauma in the coffee shop (γγγΌγ)γοΎ+Β°β’.β‘+qβͺβ wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
I drown the noise, I lost my mind
I feel like this is ending
Like this is my last night, tonight
And I can't bring myself to fight anymore
Went to 3 stores dressed like that. Was fun.
Just wanna show y'all the newest addition(s) to my lock screen wallpaper roll. Im pretty happy with it πππ

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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its giving poison ivy vibes
there's a job I'm applying to that I really want requires a fair bit of work to apply to, and I want it really bad and I gotta apply but im just at home super procrastinating π©
im going to let myself like putz around and do some dishes and not force myself to start but I'll think about it and what I want to say as I wander around and then I'll just.. hopefully.. yknow.. end up sitting down to work on it later π«
I really am trying and think this plan will work but im nervous and I always worry that im tricking myself by telling myself I'll do it and then not, but ... idk. words.
also started a new medication last night and am feeling a little anxious about that .. im just rambling . ive been having a hard time. and im still recovering from the No Sleep Week . and the weather has been a roller coaster so each morning is like a gamble on whether or not im gonna have a migraine body, im just so tired.
im sure it's going to go well! yeah! *mini guts*
My sleep is so heckin wack right now
It started with like 1 sleepless night a week for a few months, and now it's like... 1-2 fully sleepless nights, a couple nights of less than 5 hrs of sleep, and then a couple nights of like 10-13hrs of sleep.
I only got about 4 hours of sleep last night, but im still laying here in bed at 11:36pm still just.. awake. SO tired, but so awake?? π
Okay it's also been a weird shit week and my schedule changed a lot from what was a fairly regular flow and I also had a massive pain flare that lasted like 4 days
So im certainly not wondering after the cause of my wack sleep sched... I would like to find a solution tho. Take me back to 1 night missed/wk π₯² ohmygoooaaawwwdd