#cemeteryverse

ellie only dyed her hair black once. she had begged and begged for the chance to do it, pleaded and whined and almost cried about it more than she wanted to admit. she didn’t know what made lupaster finally say yes — maybe her begging had worn him down enough to agree, maybe he finally realized it was stupid for him to argue with her about a change that would be gone in six month’s time. either way, she was thrilled about his change of heart, and they went to find a box of hair dye that day.

to ellie’s knowledge, there wasn’t much of anything around their property besides a bunch of trees and some wild animals that she heard but never saw. there was barely anything alive in the area closest to the house, and lupaster hadn’t ever let her explore very far in all the time they’d been living there. driving up and down the road with him was the most she was allowed to look, but even then, there wasn’t much to actually see.

it took a little over an hour to get to the closest town every drive, and town, ellie thought, was too nice of a word for the place it actually was. there was a place to buy groceries, sure, a gas station, of course, a convenience store, and a church that lupaster always kept a ridiculous distance from, even though he knew it was totally harmless to him — but whatever. before the car even stopped, she jumped out and didn’t run — she walked very quickly towards the convenience store, leaving lupaster in the car to park or drive in small loops around the town center or something.

ellie had the store practically memorized. she already knew where to find the tiny tiny boxes of hair dye: along the back shelf of the store with all the other cosmetic products and accessories that she really wanted but couldn’t ever make herself buy. seriously, they had the cutest hair clips and matching scrunchies she would have loved to wear if her hair were longer. maybe someday, she always thought, even though she preferred her hair shorter nowadays.

the girl at the counter was sort of familiar to ellie, but not enough to remember her name. sasha? sandra? samantha? it didn’t really matter to her. she put a single boxe of black hair dye on the counter with a smile, then realized she had left her money in the car with lupaster. she squeezed her eyes shut for a second in the way she always did when she was annoyed, before excusing herself to the cashier and exiting the store.

she was grateful that lupaster had decided to park close by instead of running his own errand or wasting gas. she was a little embarrassed to go back to him empty handed — temporarily! — but she pushed through it. she really wanted the hair dye. ellie knocked on the passenger side window before opening the door and grabbing the money she had set aside in her excitement a few minutes earlier. she was relieved to find that lupaster hadn’t hidden it from her while she was gone. of course, he didn’t bother looking up at her until she had already closed the door and started walking away again.

the cashier — seriously, what was her name? — happily took her money and ellie left happily with her prize.

[trip back, hair dyeing]

when her roots grew out, she dyed them again and again until she finally ran out. her request to buy more dye was approved much faster than the first time she had asked lupaster. the hour-long drive was as boring as ever, with nothing to see except trees and bushes and more trees, but her excitement made the trip feel just a little shorter. she remembered her money before getting out of the car, and made her trip to the back corner of the store with light steps. she made sure she had enough money to buy some snacks or, really, makeup that she thought would look nice on her. she only really wanted lipstick then, so she picked a pinkish color at random and figured it was good enough. the cashier gave her a sweet smile as she brought her goods up.

she thought that she could sneak the lipstick past lupaster, but when his sharp eyes met hers, she quickly realized that she really, really couldn’t have snuck anything past him at all.

“who is that for?” he asked her immediately. she had hardly even gotten her foot in the door.

“it’s for me, obviously.”

“no,” he replied, extending his palm out towards her. he wanted her to give the lipstick over. right. “who is it for?”

“seriously? that’s your problem? it’s for no one, lup. i just thought it would look pretty on me, or whatever. i didn’t think it would be such a big deal.”

“i want you to return it.”

“what? are you kidding me?” she looked at him with wide eyes. “no! i bought it with my money. why can’t i keep it?”

“let me rephrase. you are going to return it.”

“i don’t understand what your problem is! it’s not like it’s hurting anyone! it’s just for me, at home, not to even wear outside or anything!”

“ellie,” he warns. his tone sounded like he was talking to a small child. it only made her more upset.

“come on, please? it’s just one stick, it’s probably not even that good or anything, seriously! it’s just a fun little thing for myself and no one else!”

“ellie,” he says again.

“please don’t make me take it back, lup. i really want this! i’m serious! this really doesn’t have to be such an ordeal!”

lupaster opened his door and she briefly thought that it was over — that he would get some fresh air and realize he was in the wrong. next thing she knew, she was pulled out of the car and half dragged, half carried back to the store. she struggled to get out of his grip, hitting and kicking him, but he was so much stronger than she was, she didn’t have a chance. she watched helplessly as lupaster set the unopened lipstick back on the counter and asked to return it. the girl — sarah — looked just as startled at the two of them as ellie felt. she quickly handed the money to lupaster and put the lipstick behind the counter. he finally set ellie down and, after a moment, left the store completely.

ellie felt awful. she felt embarrassed and confused and upset about what had just happened. she felt sick. it wasn’t fair. she didn’t even know why all of that happened. she wanted to scream.

without looking at sarah, she wiped her eyes on her sleeve and tried to take a deep breath. it didn’t help her calm down at all, and it was barely a deep breath with how stuttered her breathing was while she was trying not to cry, but she tried to pull herself together anyways. she hoped her face wasn’t too obviously blotchy. she waved a pitiful goodbye to sarah and started to walk out of the store.

“he just doesn’t want you growing up, sweetie,” sarah said gently. “dads always hate when their little girls grow up.”

ellie didn’t know how to respond. she didn’t bother.

the atmosphere in the car was heavy on the way home. ellie stared out of the window the entire way back, knees to her chest and her box of hair dye held protectively in her arms. the last thing she wanted to do was talk to lupaster after that… episode of his. what was his problem? was all of that just about her growing up? it felt wrong. she felt like something was missing, but she didn’t know what it could be.