āĀ you shouldnāt have seen this. āĀ Ā Ā itās been a while since charlie felt embarrassed. the feeling vanishing the day he realized there is nobody left to disappoint. his fellow agents, even merlin - he barely cares what they think. sure, he still feels a certain sense ofĀ Ā prideĀ Ā which usually leads him to aim to succeed, but all things considered, it doesnāt matter to him if they think him weak. heās already proven to them what kind of man he is, giving up kingsman without missing a beat when it wasĀ Ā HIMĀ Ā Ā orĀ Ā THEMĀ -Ā Ā and yet, for some reason, he can barely stand the thought of the american agent thinking him anything but capable and well put together. he doesnāt want to feel exposed like this, doesnāt want him to see the tremor in his hand and the slight panic in his eyes when he tries to focus, tries to suppress it ...Ā Ā and the reason for that is not, as it should be, that he doesnāt want to show weakness in the face of a fellow foreign agent, doesnāt want to safe face for the sake of his agency. no, he simply doesnāt want napoleon to think lesser of him.Ā itās why he flexes his fingers, takes a deep breath and then looks up, jaw set, eyes sharp, no sign of any emotional turmoil except for his shaky right hand.Ā Ā ā Ā anyway, it will be over soon. āĀ Ā itās what men like them do. shrugging it off, playing it casual, pretending to be fine - part of the business, just like he said. and yet when he finds the other man looking back at him, he almost blushes with embarrassment. sometimes he just forgets how much more experienced his new partner is, both in life and in the field. he must think charlie is merely a boy compared to what he is used to - an amateur. and that thought alone almost makes the tremor a bit worse.Ā ā Ā iād appreciate it if we could focus on the task at hand now,Ā Ā solo . āĀ Ā Ā part of the business.
