“Keep the fantasy within the limits of known science please, even if the idea of having a whole day free to do what you like currently feels about as feasible as mid-morning consensual buttplay with an emotionally intelligent xenomorph.”

So I mean, the question shouldn’t be if you’re going to do it, it’s really a matter of when.

While I’m not opposed to sharing what I’m writing -- because this is the ultimate of anonymity -- I’m not in the right mindset to handle anything that might come after. Multiple studies done (that Tim referenced) have proven that this practice worsens the effects of trauma immediately afterward, only to showcase improvement over time. 

He just made me write a scene using only one syllable words! One syllable words!! Do you realize how hard that was??

Let me paint this for you: This week is about the elements of style. He’s pushing us to work outside whatever style we’ve naturally adapted and try out different ones by rewriting the same scene over and over again. I haven’t minded, it’s been a fun exercise. Until today. My scene is a memory I have from college and it happens after the semester is over. USING ONE. SYLLABLE. WORDS.

I’m honestly surprised I was able to get some of those sentences out. I have never considered my style elaborate or anything beyond quietly simple, but holy crap was that a simplicity I’ve never attempted in my life. 

Fuck.

This week is all about ‘Elements of style’ and all I want to do is write a fanfic. Which would be okay, only no -- I don’t want to write more of mine or more related to what I’ve written: I want to rewrite a short story I just read. Completely. Take the characters and the events and mess up the timeline and make it into something I almost wish it was.

That’s not!! helping me stay motivated to with this boot camp. Though I’m excited I have three weeks done and only five more to go and I’m happy that it’s starting to settle in my routine. Even though I haven’t had the same day off each week, the act of sitting down and writing is there. Today felt odd until I realized I didn’t write yesterday. 

So I guess it’s working? Which is weird, but okay, let’s see how this goes.

Memorable quote:

“You’re training yourself to accept that failure is part of the process.”

I’m grateful for today’s episode. It reminded me that I haven’t been happy the last few days because my writing has “failed” the last few days. I realized that I haven’t liked what I’ve written in a couple days and rather than acknowledging the hard truth, I distracted myself with other things like motivation.

It’s not a good feeling when you have to call yourself out, but man does it make moving on afterward so much easier. I need to remember this.

I’m starting to miss writing. I think it’s because I have all these ideas and no way to push them out, but I feel like that’s part of the purpose to this boot camp. I burned out writing so much during July and August. If I continue trying to push out more writing while doing this, I’ll end up the same. It’s really hard to break the sprinting habit I’ve had and tailor it toward a marathon, but I’m determined to do it.

Even when all my doubts surface and I'm practically convinced this blog is a waste. 

No memorable quote for today, again.

I’m not sure if I’m losing interest or if this is just a busy week. Considering the holiday Thursday and trying to fit an entire week of work into two and a half days, I’m hoping it’s the latter. I’m also hoping that I’m just not feeling this week.

Today I was supposed to create a character completely different from myself and I did, but I don’t think I did the best I could. I’m just not satisfied with my work today, but I’m letting it be. I have to accept the bad with the good and let it all stand.

Aiming for tomorrow to be a better day.

Memorable quote:

None.

I’m not here today. I got home from dinner with my parents to find our internet is out, the earliest we can get it fixed is Wednesday morning, and then after going through the process of tech support and scheduling a tech to come out to the house, my husband asked me, “Have you tried unplugging it and plugging it back in?” If it were possible to reach through the phone and strangle someone, I would have.

We were summoning demons today! Crazy, right? Only not when he actually got into it. He read two excerpts from The Screwtape Letters and wanted us to write based on that premise. I actually enjoyed it, even though it was a weird exercise and I’m mentally twelve miles away standing on sand and doing nothing but watching the water. It was an interesting exercise that I wish I had done yesterday. I would have been in a much better mindset to do so.

Memorable quote:

“Just because something isn’t real, per se, doesn’t mean it’s not true.”

He’s speaking to other writers. I’ve known this, I’ve accepted this, I’ve let it glide over me, but man, it was harder to get past it today. I throw out something I wrote quickly and to me, it’s rough and unedited and just the start. But that doesn’t mean it or the potential it has isn’t good.

Tim is speaking to writers who won’t let them even throw the words on the page, who expect perfection on the first draft, who are so cooped up in their own fears and expectations, they don’t even give themselves a chance. Writer Friend is like this. I’ve known that for a while. The further I get into this boot camp, the more I know Writer Friend will benefit from it.

And it’s not a bad thing! These exercises are good for me even if I’ve already leapt over that particular mental block. Thing is, while he’s trying to break through that block for other people, I’m stuck with a ridiculous amount of ideas swirling in my notebook and the knowledge that I don’t have the time or energy to flesh them out into stories.

Considering this is my only complaint, I’m not bothered at all. It’s not even a real complaint, more a mild irritation that my brain doesn’t want to deal with. I just know I’ll have three dozen more ideas by the time this eight weeks is over.