#bye posts

i hope davy jones invites you to his big giant mansion in hollywood where he runs his giant pimp business and then someone comes in with a big pot of money to his room but the pot is so big it smashes through the floor and hits micky whose on the ground floor flirting with girls and they have to pay for him to have surgery to remove the gold coins in his ass and davy shakes his head, running his hands through his hair, and clicking his gold teeth together and he turns to you and mutters "mo' money, mo' problems"

i hope the monkees are about to go to a show and then paul mccartney turns up and looks at davy and goes GIRRRLLLLL YOU NEED A BETTER UPDO and does davy's hair and makeup and they giggle and talk about girls and primp in the mirror for hours and then the monkees never get to go to the show so they never get famous and end up selling kentucky fried texas prairie chickens for the rest of their lives and because micky dolenz is your father you are never born welcome to jackass

i hope you're just walking down the street and all of a sudden you and the entire city is swept off your feet into a giant soft white sock and the top of it closes and you all suffocate and die and then micky dolenz opens the top and looks in, laughing at all the dead bodies and whispers,"sock it to me"

i hope you make fun of peter tork's dimples and he cries and the tears accumulate into a giant pool and become a salt lake and then an ocean and there's just a hurricane of peter's tears and you drown in them and you go straight to hell and you are forced to fuck jimmy page for all eternity by satan is that a good thing or a bad thing you tell me nigga

i hope mike nesmith appears beside you and you completely explode bc of all the attractive and then you are reborn as a small particle of space matter in the universe and then you realize that you are actually a star and then you realize you are actually a planet and then you realize you are actually a small piece of dandruff in peter tork's hair but it doesn't matter bc he sold you to the devil and you end up washing jimmy page's hair for all eternity

i hope mike nesmith suffocates you with his woolhat cos well you're dumb and then you die and then everyone goes crowding around him and going "someone call 911!" and then someone tries to jump him but he knocks him off turns to the camera, goes "isn't that dumb", takes out a machine gun and kills everyone

i hope you're a chair and pete townshend sits on you and you collapse into a pile of wood and twigs because of his like enormous ass and he's charged with murder and it's a huge deal and at his trial he's convicted as guilty and is sentenced to life in prison but surprise plot twist pete doesnt exactly agree with that verdict no bitch tells the townshend what to do so he snorts the entire universe into his nose and everyone dies

i hope you're a horse and mike puts a saddle on you and starts riding you all the way to town which way do i mean this who knows thats for me to know and you to wonder