Burns doesn't visit. It's not really his style, Spirit tells herself. He has busy days full of doing whatever the fuck he wants, and that rarely involves caring about other people — people who miss him, and worry about him, and want him, inexplicably, in their lives. It's quite sad.
But Xeno is, apparently, not too occupied for Xeno. Not too occupied to show up exactly when he needs something from her. Even looking at Xeno and Burns through the distorted fish eye in her front door, she can tell they're only here out of desperation.
"Xeno." Her mouth is slanted, her foot tapping impatiently. "What the fuck is wrong with you?"
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"Preeeee-cisely. I just didn't want you to worry, champ. 'Cause, y'know," In rare form, he lowers his voice, "Some people that I associate with just carry crazy shit around willy nilly, but I'm not like that. I'm, y'know, built different."
But Andrew is smiling, or at least was. He must find this all a little bit funny.
"And you're always safe with me. I think together, we'd actually make a pre-tty sick team."
He's got years of being trained by a super soldier, sure, but that teenage boy became a man who hadn't been in combat training since he was a child, was relying mostly on muscle memory, had no idea how to tell Burns to compensate for his short height, for the ease in which his bones could break.
What I'm also saying is that — his reflexes are okay. But they aren't great. So Black Noir wraps his gloved hand around Burns's throat and squeezes, squeezes, squeezes —
Burns learns the hard way that when he isn't getting oxygen, the flames in his hands are extinguished. He is just a boy, flailing for his laugh, choking and wheezing in a way he didn't know he was capable of. Smoke doesn't burn his lungs, but this might crush his windpipe.
Black Noir has pivoted towards the window when Harris makes out through the smoke and blaze what's going on. He reacts faster than any other person should or could — suddenly feeling the super in super soldier, his speed enhanced and inhuman — and does the first thing he can think of.
He kicks Black Noir's legs out from under him at the knee, hopes he's strong enough to get through the tactical gear and break something, well, breakable. He brandishes his handgun and pistol whips the side of Black Noir's helmet. Something cracks — the helmet's material, maybe skull.
Harris raises his arms, prepares to slam the gun down again.
@utilgitt asked for: five times penny told burns to shut the fuck up
one.
"EPCOT ball," Burns says, staring in awe up at the thing. "Y'know what'd make it even prettier? What if weeeeeee—"
Don't.
"You didn't even let me—
I'm serious. Honey, don't.
two.
"She's a FUCKING BITCH, Penny! She's dramatic and whiny and obsessed with herself. Only thing she cares about more? Fucking! That's it. Fucking and herself. And I'm just sick of it, man, I'm really goddamn sick of it."
She's your sister. And you need to stop calling women bitches.
"What if she's a woman, my sister, and also a raging bitch?"
I'm not answering that. Goodnight, Burns.
She gets the bed; Burns sleeps on the floor with the extra, mothy blanket. He wraps himself up, flops down, and huffs.
three.
They share a banana split. Penny dabs sweat from her forehead with the collar of her shirt. It is day three of their Disney bender. She misses the real world — or maybe just a world without Burns.
"Y'know, he's not so bad, when you get to know him. He's got a temper, sure, but you get used to it. And it's never anything I can't handle."
Shut up about Harris. He's not my friend.
"He could be," Burns taunts in a singsong.
He won't be.
four.
"That man's been staring at you all night. You should introduce yourself."
I'm not going to do that.
"Ohhhh, okay. OKAY. Yeah, sure, right, right. — so do you want me to kill this guy for you?"
I'm going to pretend you didn't say that.
"And I'M going to pretend you said yes." With a wolfish grin, he sliiiiiiides off the barstool.
Penny grabs him by the collar of his shirt, practically the scruff of his neck. He stops in his tracks, defeated like a character in cartoon.
Burns — have you ever heard the phrase don't shit where you eat? Maybe stop shitting everywhere so much.
five.
Burns stands for an ovation, clapping louder than the other attendees — they're being too polite, Burns thinks, and Penny's being too modest, and she could do with a little ego boost.
A short man with salt and pepper hair is watching, captivated and amused as Penny blows him a kiss. Bewildered by the loud noise Burns makes, he turns to face them and looks slightly mortified.
Penny looks like a ghost. Burns laughs and whistles and claps, and Penny drags him, still laughing, out of the lounge.
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