#bsa1-6pendon

Lasting friendships are one of life’s real prizes, however to achieve this it is not an easy feat. I am very thankful to consider myself blessed with lasting friendships with family and friends. I pray these relationships only grow and deepen. However along life’s journey, inevitably there are always some friendships that just simply do not stand the test of time. There’s that saying, Some people come into your life for a reason. I am very much agree with this saying and strongly believe that in fact it is a good thing that all relationships are different and that each come with their own lessons and blessings. In fact, through certain friendships coming to an end, it has made me cherish the relationships I have with loved ones even more. A true friend loves you even when you are not loveable. Like any human, I have had these times. The gratitude I feel to the ones who have stuck by me is immeasurable. On the flip side, there have been dear ones in my life who have gone through rocky times. I am not a saint. It is not easy to be there for someone when they are being difficult. But when you love that person, and know that person has a good heart, that is what keeps you from giving up on them. In today’s day and age where everybody is so crazy busy with their partners, families and studies it gets increasingly difficult to set aside time to catch up with friends, talk less of meeting up with them. What I’ve started doing is to set aside time in my diary to holler at my friends, and set aside time to meet up as well. I’m very thankful for the life I have because I have loved ones in all different places, but of course it makes it that much more difficult to see them. But like everything else, if you plan, it most certainly can be done. Shoutout to all the peeps that came to my lige as well because I knew for a lot of you, it’s wasn’t exactly around the corner. I do appreciate you!! It can be scary being in a friendship and letting that person see the real and true you. When I was younger, I felt I had to adapt a lot to suit certain people. Even though there are situations where I still do just that to this day when it comes to friendships, if you do not like the person I really am, there really is not much more we can do here honey. Getting to be let in into people’s lives is such a privilege, because not everyone gets that opportunity. It’s our own responsibilities to put the work in to keep our friendships strong. May we never take them for granted.

In the modern fate of our lives we are introduced to a strong concept of family. Many considered that having a perfect family is a manifestation of a perfect life. Something that unfortunately, not all people can afford. Life maybe too tough for someone whose family wasn't just bent, but totally broken. My mother died the instance I was sent out to this world, my father then decided to have new family. My brother, the only one who was with me growing up alone to achieve milestones in my life without my parents and sometimes I'll still end up longing for something that I couldn't achieve anymore a complete family. But without the presence of my parents, I can't say that I'm in a hopeless case scenario. I'd end up living in another home, build with love and concern from my extended family, who gave me a new hope to live my life and fight for something that I should be fighting for. Though somentimes, I can't help myself staring in the dark times of my life. I choose to look for even a little spark of light from the darkness and live for it, for this light will guide me into a home not the typical one with father as a structure and mother as light but a home with more than a father and a mother - a big family. Being in a family might be something too tragic for someone to overcome. But in a way, it's something to learn from. It can be a motivation it's in our hands. When you stayed in these dark times of your lives, you might be eaten by the shadows at sadness. Find the light in every dark. One might say, for someone like me its impossible for me to build my family back, but there's a way to mend it. If you can't build your family anymore, build another one. Build another home. This time, it won't be called broken home.

First love is very powerful, it is a collection of all the small details you had with him that made it momentous. It is filled with laughters, tears, pains, adventures, struggles and lessons. You gained your first every love lesson. For some people, their first love is their destiny but for some it is someone who taught them what the real essence of love is. Throughout our relationship up until now, I can clearly remember everything. His laugh, smile, tears, moods, hugs and kisses and even the day we broke up. It honestly shuttered me, I'm like a jigsaw puzzle stuck into the reality that I'm messed up. Waiting for that perfect person who will actually fix ne and keep me whole. I will never blame my first love, he broke my heart for the very first time and he even left me miserable but I still thank him. Maybe because all the silly things we've done are tattooed in my heart. I remember the first day we met, he looked at me awkwardly but I can sincerely see that he's someone worth keeping for. Despite of his awkward actions, I learned to appreciate the beauty of love. It was cold and silent night when he held my hand, and I can never explain what I felt that night. There are butterflies in my belly, but his warm and soft hands told me to calm. He taught me to hold on whenever things aren't working the way I want. I learned to be patient, to wait and to never lose hope. He helped me build the personality I never thought I will be having. He made me stronger and wiser, he opened my eyes to the reality of the cruel world. That you should have a strong foundation, coz no one will help you at the end. And I didn't realize that he just prepared myself up until the day that he will say goodbye.