#breakfast-solstice

All the guys who’ve been in bed with me:

The air ram

Impulsive nature, eccentric mind. Grand smile and ideas to share. Felt like home–the home that was always on fire and had the backdoor open. His anaerobic reality swallowed me whole. I learned prayer is love.

The earth scorpion

Shadowy traits to combat the bubbly ones. The intensity quickly extinguished by the silliness in him. The chase was lustful and short-lived. I wanted spit, blood, tears, and sweat but got excess honey and vinegar.

The fire centaur

Shot from the hip and kept his charm alongside his passion. Undercurrent of melancholy masked by adrenaline-seeking activities. We both knew what it was and wasn’t but pretended otherwise.

The water cat

1. We are all gorgeous, fleshy and blubbery beings

2. The ocean is the womb of the earth

Imagine a jar for your container and filling up a jar with your love to give to others

(Obviously you will give many jars and not count them but that’s not the point)

Think about how you get to know someone and how you gradually give them your love, curiosity, care, time, affection, attention, etc…

And visualize first that it is raw cane sugar being poured - hard grains hitting the bottom making a high pitched sound, building a hill swiftly and without time to settle into all the edges of the cylinder

A fast pour like that could be how you desire to fill the jar in some cases,

But my love now feels like it has space and time when I imagine it as molasses instead - a silky, smooth liquid, not in any hurry and surely not succumbing to any outside forces to rush it

You want to be there for me

That worm has lost its hook

Salt water in the eyes stings

breakthrough those intense feelings and desires are meant to drive you somewhere, be a vehicle of sorts. Feelings inspire action, Desires inspire action, but they don't magically produce a result

They aren’t an outcome in themselves

heart beating just to