#brain disconnect

Hi hello I would gladly say more about the page of heart! And later about the sylph as well but that’s for a later post :3

Well then. As I mentioned in the post about pages as a whole, the page is a class of self-growth. They need to learn to better themselves in order to become unimaginably powerful, which, unfortunately, isn’t something we see from any canonical pages, but we can definitely tell they’re not even scratching the surface on how much potential a page can have if they let themselves have it.

Also mentioned in that post is that a page’s lesson at self-betterment would be difficult; they might not like what they’re told they need to change in themselves, or it might be ingrained too deep into who they perceive themselves as, which is also part of why a page of heart can be on both sides of the spectrum when it comes to self-love.

The heart aspect is that of emotions, such as love, and is also about the self, or the soul (hence the concept of fragmentation when it comes to heart players). A heart player would probably be invested in the people around them without any want to mingle, though in a different sense to that of the people-watching mind players. A heart player is likely to give emotional advice, and may even be willing to be the shoulder for you to cry on, as long as you haven’t been looking for them specifically. They’re the center of their own world, but would likely despise being thought of as anyone else’s. I don’t mean that in a mean way, either- I almost thought myself to be a heart player for quite a while, so I say that all with love to all the heart players out there <3

A page of heart, in that sense, is even deeper in self-betterment than any other page, since their sense of self is so strong - the question is just what opinion they may have on that “self”. On one hand, they can adore who they are, which can easily become a fault in the way they treat other people as “other”- the entire “you wouldn’t get it” tirade is strong in that case. They see themselves as entirely separate to anyone else in the sense where they’re higher, and their struggles are more unique or even sophisticated for anyone else to understand. In that case, I recommend a good whacking over the head with a rolled up newspaper (quick disclaimer: this is a joke, I usually use that phrase when talking about characters I like who act like idiots) and a call for them to wake up and see they’re being a bit of a diva. Alternatively, and perhaps more commonly attributed to pages, they might be a person of self-loathing. They see flaws in who they are and find compliments ingenuine or just incorrect. No amount of love would wake them up because everyone else has “unrealistic” expectations of them, and they’re sure they’re failing even when with loved ones who reassure them. I see those pages like most artists probably do when looking at their own art three days after they finish it and immediately go “oh no this is terrible”. They lack that ever-important self esteem that makes them any amount of confident in what they love to do. This page may need some time alone or, perhaps, to truly fail something and be told that nobody in their session thinks them to be perfect; they truly are good at stuff, and all those compliments were well-earned.

The point is, a page of heart would need to reflect about how they see themselves in order to better their session. How do they feel about the stuff they like to do? Would it matter that they’re bad at it, if they are, or is the happiness they receive from it more important? They should define their own worth, and study themselves to make it as accurate as they could, without any bias towards whether they think they’re good or bad at anything in particular. That does mean that if, for example, you’re an artist, and a lot of people like your art, it means its good, regardless of if you see it two days later and think it’s actually awful. We all do that, but that opinion is rather biased. Learning to go beyond that bias to see what you love for what it is, which is something you enjoy and can always get better at (because not all of us can be lords of mind, what the heck), is really hard, and also is the lesson for the page of heart to learn.

'Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day? Thou art more lovely and more temperate