#bnhafictive

the itch followed me to this life. ngl, i didn't expect to have such adverse reactiom to realizing it. this is my fifth? sixth? attempt at writing the confession because each and every one of the previous attempts just spiraled into incoherent freaking out. the itch is psychological, too. there's nothing i can do about it besides just trying to ignore it.

Sometimes its funny to see other fictives from my source bashing on me, but other times it hurts :( Yeah, source me wasn't that great, and I get that! I can laugh at source me sometimes, but other times I wish it wasn't so easy to find, I guess.

Okay so i was talking to our host (an izuku fictive) about like. system history and shit whatever, hes trying to figure out some stuff because thats just what he does. Anyways i look up mid convo, and theres just. a funko pop box. with a picture of my dead grandmother on it. just. staring at me. and i basically went "WHAT THE FUCK IS SHE DOING THERE" apparently the host got a funko pop of my grandmother for his birthday. Shes a hero so it checks out for him, typical izuku behavior but Oh boy that was a jumpscare.

Being a fictive is so fucking funny actually im like. Essentially a fictive of middle school izuku (plus some crimes lol) and yet. And yet. I am pretty much the host of a system that is Literally in college. Breaking news everypony quirkless 14 year old with delinquent tendencies is IN COLLEGE. Best part is that we're looking into mechanical engineering as a major. 14 year old quirkless delinquent is the engineer who made your fuckin train. TAKE THAT KACCHAN >:D (thats a joke dont hurt me)

My League of Villains is something I don’t recognize anymore. After All For One possessed me, things went to shit. He led them using my body and I had to watch. That’s not what I wanted. That’s not what the League wanted. We were supposed to tear down hero-society and rebuild a world where everyone had a chance to live how they wanted. I hate this. I hate heroes. I hate All For One. He fucking used me. Now everyone is dying and there’s nothing I can do about it because my body isn’t mine anymore, and all he’s doing is using my mouth to laugh about it.

do you ever thing a character is a fictionflicker but then it turns out you've just been a whole ass other fucking guy.

Damn. I've been dormant for a few years and within the first week I'm back I have to deal with all sorts of bullshit. BUT the gods knew I'd be too powerful if I had my quirks back so they had to nerf me. I'd like to fight whoever made that decision. Even just my original one at this point.

My source could be so good if only it was good.