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I'm slowly ruining myself. I can't stop looking back to the past and I'm basically allowing it to prevent me from stepping in to my future. The mistakes I made and regrets I hold still torture me, which lead me to wondering what would have happened if I did something differently, or never have made a certain decision, or fixed a problem before it was too late. It feels like I can't accept what's already happened and I'm trapped in my own history.
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Those moments.
Those moments where I just want to have you here next to me, holding me and giving me those soft forehead kisses you know I love so much. I can't get you off of my mind and every little thing that reminds me of you just makes my heart sink. There's a huge knot in my stomach that's only there because I'm missing you like crazy. I wish I could just hold your hand, kiss those lips, feel that security in your warm embrace. Yeah.. I fucking hate those moments.
