i know we talk a lot about the potential for zane to have identity issues for multiple reasons(robot stuff, memories, etc etc) but there is HUGE missed potential for pixal’s identity to have it’s own mess.
she’s introduced in season 3 as an assistant. that was her life and then she met zane. for first time since she was created, she had a real, honest connection that was unlike anything she had ever been programmed to process or feel. she watched him die. and she helped him come back.
then in s4 she is dismantled and shoved onto a hard drive, put in zane’s software, and stays there. until 4 SEASONS LATER when she’s moved to the destiny’s bounty and officially re-introduced as samurai x(3 and a half seasons if you wanna count hands of time but my point stands).
imagine a life of being somebody else’s add on. from cyrus borg’s assistant, to zane’s assistant. imagine forcing yourself to content with being somebody’s personal clippy program. yes, it’s somebody you love very dearly, and you would much rather be with him than on a dusty outdated computer in that dungeon on chen’s island. you can provide scans and additional equations/statistics and info, so at least you’re useful.
but you are not in control at all. this is not your body. you get a virtual model of something you used to have and that’s it, like a game controller thats not plugged in. you cannot speak to the others unless zane verbalizes it or connects to another screen. you are literally canned in your boyfriends head.
do you resent him? are you allowed to? do you still matter to him? are you still somebody to the soul who fundamentally changed you in countless ways, as a robot and a person, if he never once offers to give you an actual physical being outside of him?
