“It was really crucial for me to hear other bisexual women. That’s really what did it for me. Just one meeting with bisexual women and I knew that I was in the right place.”
- Pamela, Bi Lives: Bisexual Women Tell Their Stories

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“It was really crucial for me to hear other bisexual women. That’s really what did it for me. Just one meeting with bisexual women and I knew that I was in the right place.”
- Pamela, Bi Lives: Bisexual Women Tell Their Stories

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“I love (bi women). They’re the most meaningful people in my life. They’re my grounding. They’re the women that I can sit around with and talk about everything, and it’s okay for me to be me. That’s the bottom line.”
- Revi, Bi Lives: Bisexual Women Tell Their Stories
“If you come out as bi, you’re not coming out into a niche. You’re coming out into a big, watery, nebulous mass where it may very well be that there is no one social group or even social situation where you feel entirely accepted and comfortable… The only place that I can find that feeling with is with other bi women.”
- Revi, Bi Lives: Bisexual Women Tell Their Stories
“There are women who would no longer approve of me if they knew I was bisexual. I would hate to lose my good name in the lesbian community.
I used to feel a lot of hostility towards bisexuals myself, or at least a lot of suspicion. I’m not sure that I don’t still feel some wariness. I’ve mellowed out a lot over the years. I have straight friends that I trust implicitly, but when somebody I’ve just met tells me they’re bisexual I’m cautious. I’m certainly not open sexually to a bisexual woman, because I don’t want to give my energy to somebody whose (sic) going to take it and give it to men. This is probably going to be something that women who are identified as bisexual in a different way than I am will find offensive, but I don’t think I’m the only one who feels this way. I would feel horrible if anybody I was lovers with was involved with a man after me. It would make me feel like shit. It would be like being devalued.
I think that what’s really going on with me is that I think lesbians are better than bisexuals. So if somebody is my lover, and then they are involved with a man, they’re lowering themselves and what we had. Certain buzz phrases come up, like consorting with the enemy… It’s like they fooled you into thinking they were somebody they weren’t, and it feels like a ripoff.”
- Judy Freespirit, Bi Lives: Bisexual Women Tell Their Stories
“I always used to say that I really liked men better than I liked women. I think what I liked about men was their power; and I didn’t like myself, so it was easier to like men than to like other women.”
- Judy Freespirit, Bi Lives: Bisexual Women Tell Their Stories

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“Most people assume that I am straight, because I don’t look like the stereotypical lesbian. But if I mention a girlfriend to them they assume I’m a lesbian. If I mention a boyfriend they assume that I’m straight. That gets tiresome.”
- Rachel, Bi Lives: Bisexual Women Tell Their Stories
“Monogamy also has some political implications for me. If you are in a partnership with just one other person then you make a power block of two, so that when you’re with any single people you have more power together than they have. Plus people tend not to take their friends as seriously as their lover when they’re in a monogamous relationship. Their lover always comes first. If there’s time left over they spend it with friends.”
- Judy Freespirit, Bi Lives: Bisexual Women Tell Their Stories
“That’s just the way the world is structured. If you’re a bisexual woman your available partners are heterosexual and bisexual men, and lesbian and bisexual women. There are lots of heterosexual and bisexual men, and there are a smaller amount of lesbian and bisexual women. If you just randomly go through life, you’re going to encounter more potential male partners than potential female partners. It always seemed like I was open to either, but I kept meeting men I was interested in. In getting involved with them I was missing out on getting involved with women.”
- Diana, Bi Lives: Bisexual Women Tell Their Stories