#beyondstressed

I seriously can't handle this.

I have so much work I'm either pulling an all-nighter or staying up until 4 a.m every night just to get the bare minimum done, and even then I'm doing a shitty job of it.  I've gotten so little sleep lately that, today, on the way from math class I almost passed out.  Pretty much I got really nauseous and my eyes closed on their own and my knees buckled and I just fell.  I threw up this morning for the first time in the past two weeks (before all this I hadn't barfed since I was like, eight.)  But honestly I'd be fine with the sleep deprivation on it's own, the thing that's really bothering me is that I'm pushing myself this hard and I've got nothing to show for it. I've been getting C's and D's in my Graphic Design projects because I have no idea what the fuck I'm doing and have no time to commit to learning it effectively because of all the work I have in my other classes.

Even worse than all that though?  I can't stop feeling sorry for myself and it's fucking pathetic and makes me hate myself even more than I hate this shitty situation that I've managed to get myself in. 

I feel like I can't breathe.

Anyway I just really needed to get all of this out somewhere because god (if there even is one) knows that even if I had a friend that was willing to listen the last thing the last thing I'd want to do is make him/her sit through my pathetic whining.