Dec 9, 2018
THE NEW MARY POPPINS SOUNDTRACK CAME OUT AND IβM NOT READY
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THE NEW MARY POPPINS SOUNDTRACK CAME OUT AND IβM NOT READY
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A woman told me that I have beautiful eyes, which is funny because they're all puffy and terrible this morning. That was a moment of humility for me. I am a mess, and usually not a beautiful one. I screw up so hard that I scare myself sometimes. I lose control and lose myself and realize that I'm not always who I want to be. But last night God spoke to me something that is best minimized and summed up in these lyrics. Who I thought I was / And who I thought I had to be / I had to give them both up / Cause neither were willing to ever believe. I've got this idea in my head of all the things I have to stop doing wrong and start doing right, all of the things "we" have to stop doing wrong and start doing right. But God needs me to let go of that so He can finally do what He wants to do. That's what it comes down to. I can't remake myself, and I've got to stop trying.