#beckerbell

I could rec you so many things, but I’m not sure what you want to read. ):

A bunch of things? I'm always craving crunchy hurt!Loki fic, and recently I've been wanting gen Thor&Loki fic where the their relationship isn't fixed but it's not completely broken either, where it's contentious and hard but there's still affection visible. (This is my problem, it's all so specific.) 

Always Steve/Loki, but I've given up on finding any of that that I haven't read already. 

Anything with Clint&Loki that matches my very particular and specific requirements for that relationship. 

What I SHOULD do is just go to bed and leave you with your horribleness, but then you might be too soul-crushed to write more of that Big Brother universe and I HAVE NOT FORGOTTEN ABOUT THAT, so instead I will hiss goodnight

YOU ARE GRACIOUS INDEED and just for you when I'm inevitably stalled on my longer projects tomorrow I will write up another piece of that AU although I'm not ready to commit to AO3 posting yet

I can put it up here like the first bit people do that right

*makes warding gestures at* You’re an awful person, because now I just hurt for them both and everyone in the universe ever, you’re terrible.

I HAVE A LOT??? OF YOUNGER SIBLING WITH COMPLEXES???? FEEELINGS?????

And even Steve/Loki is better than some ships I’ve loved passionately. You don’t know true pain until there is actually NO fanart in existence AND you had to write all the fic yourself/con it out of your friends. TRY THAT FOR FIVE MINUTES.

I have a surprising amount of feelings and something like sympathy for this, because I do think FrostIron isn’t what it once was and it doesn’t have as much art for it, but that’s kind of crowded out by “THERE ARE OVER 3K FICS ON AO3 ALONE”

yeah I guess that may be the case? and I probably should be more sympathetic, but I am not very nice

and also my sympathy vanishes the minute I go looking for steve/loki art and there are maybe six pieces of artwork for it if I'm lucky? XD like YOU DON'T KNOW MY SUFFERING, MAN, YOU HAVE NEVER SCROLLED THROUGH DEVIANTART FOR HOURS LOOKING AT STEVE/TONY ART WHILE YOU'RE TRYING TO FIND ONE PIECE OF STEVE/LOKI GET OUT

I finally had to take a break from writing because I was feeling this way constantly, like I couldn’t get more than 1k into something without hating it or being distracted, IT WAS SO TERRIBLE and I feel so much of your pain. ;__;

I wish sometimes I could do that? But if I take a break from writing I just start to feel twitchy and nervous and tense - much like I do when I feel like I'm not getting anywhere with the writing I'm doing - and basically what I'm saying is that I've replaced a fair number of my compulsive desires with "write, dammit" and this is sometimes unfortunate augh

I FEEL YOU ON THE SHIPPING THING, like, I enjoy FrostIron a lot! I read a good amount of fic for it and I love it! But whyyyyy doesn't it have my heart more? Not that I'm really that starved for Thorki, but... Steve/Loki... Natasha/Loki..... ;__;

quietly weeping I just...I mean I have a lot of conflicted Loki/Tony emotions and most of them are incompatible with the majority of what fandom does with the pairing but I read it anyway out of sheer fucking desperation because so many good writers seem to be there and...

You should read happier fic to make up for it! I helpfully included a bunch more happy ones, too! (Man, sometimes I’m envious of the FrostIron fandom, SO MANY GOOD EPICS, cries.)

I should! I'm just...so bad at happy fic. It takes a very particular kind to suck me in and make me actually...feel the happy. I think mostly I just need tough stories with happy endings right now. Stories where people suffer but things end okay.