Hollanov is the perfect example of the ‘my parents believe I’m a failure’ vs ‘my parents believe I’m the most especial person in the world’ damage and how they are similar and so different at the same time.
Both need to be the best, both believe failure is unacceptable and makes them less lovable, both built their lives around proving their parents right/wrong.
But Ilya’s damage is ‘if I don’t give people around me a reason to love me, they won’t’ so he engineers tunamelt to prove to Shane he is worth sticking around for and doesn’t blink while sacrificing his career so they can be closer by. And of course refuses to share anything remotely negative because that’s not who he is, he’s the fun guy! He will not be a burden, he promises. (But also why is Shane not meeting his mom in his dream? Why doesn’t he realize that Ilya is suffering for them? Sure, Ilya is hiding it but Shane should notice and see that Ilya would do anything for him and maybe even reward him by doing this specific things that Ilya would never ask him directly to do).
Meanwhile Shane has built his identity around ‘I cannot disapoint anyone ever’ and thus has to protect his career and fix what was broken with his team and ‘no, nothing is wrong I’m handling it’ while silently (and not so silently) wondering how Ilya can stand to play with the centaurs because they are loving and all but they lose. And Shane Hollander is not allowed to lose even if his team makes him miserable. He’s humble, he’s loyal, he’s dependable, and he will get the room back dammit! (And won’t allow Ilya to lose the room, coming out did not work out, and Ilya already lost a team, let’s keep him from losing another. The closet was uncomfortable sure but it was safe and it didn’t mess with his game).
The long game is facinating because they are both trying to protect each other but coming from completely different angles and hurting each other (and especialy themselves) more. There’s no bad guy here, just a shitty situation and two people that should communicate but would rather set themselves on fire.












