#beatriceblaze

Julie kept arguing with the bartender ushering them out of the bar, completely angry with how he was kicking them out because of something that Julie took no responsibility for but just because she was the loudest, it meant she had to leave. And Beatrice. Surely she understood how unfair it was!

“I’m gonna come back when you’re off work and kick your ass,” Julie threatened him as she stepped out to which he just scoffed and rolled his eyes. Julie didn’t exactly look the most threatening. Average height, slim figure. No way any man over 6ft and went to the gym once a week would ever be threatened by. Little did they know…

“That was totally unfair, wasn’t it?” She turned to Beatrice. They were having a nice time prior to that, weren’t they? Julie was always a good time. Especially to pretty women and Beatrice was definitely a pretty woman.

Bea could say with certainty, she had never been kicked out of a bar before. She had watched her sister be kicked out of bars, but she had never been involved herself. Julie was really pretty and in a way fun to hang out with, but she had to admit that this all was a bit much. Still she nodded towards Julie in support,“Yeah, totally unnecessary. There are people who are being as loud.” She looked around them, not sure what to do now that they were outside of Dell’s,“Should we find another place to get drinks then?”

“I swear some of these people just have it out for me.” Julie said with a shake of her head. Stupid bars. At least she wasn’t banned though. They were understanding in that sense. They had been drinking for a while before getting kicked however, so Julie wasn’t sure if she wanted to go to another bar. She didn’t want to get drunk. “Maybe we can go back to your place for drinks?” Julie suggested glancing over at Bea, trying to hide her smirk.

“Some people just get so nit-picky when they drink,” Bea tried to reassure Julie. She didn’t want Julie to get any more upset than she already was. This other woman was feisty and Bea wasn’t used to less fierce than someone she was out with. It was an odd feeling honestly. “Uh, my sisters live with me, so I don’t usually have people over… Could we go to yours?” She could do what she did with Dario and get a hotel room for the night. Or try to sneak Julie into the house… As she contemplated their next move, she heard clicking and whistling nearby. “Do you hear that too?”

I don’t have a place. Julie sure wasn’t going to admit that just yet (if ever). “I’m sure it’ll be fine. It’s just drinks.” She tried to reassure but then heard a sound. She turned around, trying to make sense of where it was coming from. “Yeah… what - what is that?” A bird? Not like any bird she’s heard and given her time in the woods, she’s heard a lot of them. Just when she was distracted by the sound and looking up to see if she could spot anything, she felt something pass by them. As she glanced down she saw a green blur.

Bea tried to look around for the mysterious sound without looking too alarmed. There were too many things in this town that could be dangerous, especially at a time like this. Had she not been looking for something she would have completely missed the blur that went by her. Glancing down she noticed quickly that her gold bracelet was gone. That bangle was one she wore to match her sisters, a charm on each to tell the sisters if someone was on their property. “No!” She let out as she took off after the blur. “Give me my bracelet back!”

Before Julie could process something happened, Bea was running and Julie had to go running after her because what the hell was happening? Her bracelet? Stolen by some green things. Well, this night was taking a different path than she had thought it would. As the creature seemed to be heading into the forest, Julie took greater strides, knowing it was more likely to end up getting away if they got too deep into the forest. She leapt forward and managed to grab onto something. A small body and when she looked up and was eye to eye with some big headed creature. “Ugh you’re ugly.” It wasted no time biting her hand and she pulled it back as she yelped in pain. It continued taking off. “You big headed fuck!” She growled and continued running, pissed off.

Julie was fast, Bea noticed with wide eyes. She had no idea what these things were but she knew that she needed to get her bracelet back. Her mom could make a new one for her, but this had meaning, she had gotten them with her sisters. “What is that?” She asked rather shocked at the appearance of the thing. She pushed herself to catch up with Julie. “I’m sorry! It stole my bracelet and it’s really important!” She felt terrible that she had dragged Julie into whatever this was, but she needed that bracelet back. “I guess this is a good time to ask if you know about the supernatural?”

Julie had to laugh at Bea asking her about the supernatural at a time like this. She looked over at her. “No, it’s my first time.” She couldn’t resist and gave her a wink. Alright, it seemed they couldn’t beat it though sheer speed. Julie was starting to wind down, her sprint losing speed. “We’ll get the bracelet back don’t worry. But it won’t be until after I stomp on those green little shits.” She hadn’t a clue what they were but knew they were pests. While it would have been easy to conjure some shadow from the ground to grab whatever it was and get the bracelet back safely, she knew better than to use her abilities around someone she couldn’t trust. There was one too many people who knew what she could do right now. But if they continued to be annoying, she might just have to.

For a moment, Bea was worried she would have to explain the whole thing about supernatural creatures until she caught Julie’s wink. She let out a soft laugh at it. It was nice that Julie could still tease her even though they were chasing some awful creature through the town now. Bea was tempted to send out a little fireball at the creature’s head, she wasn’t sure she should around Julie. There was still a witch hunter around somewhere and she didn’t know who was willing to work for her. “My knight in shining armor,” Bea said with a little laugh. The creature was so fast and Bea was not gaining on them much. She supposed she could try some more simple magic and see if that would trip up the thing. It was much more subtle than her fire magic would be. With a little mutter under her breath, she tried a spell she had been taught as a kid. The fae tripped on the invisible force she had made, which let the two women start to close the distance.

It tripped! Julie didn’t see what it tripped on but that gave her the confidence to go faster. It was so close now, not close enough to reach out and grab but if she kicked off at the right time with the right speed and strength… there! She leapt out to grab the thing like it was a damn ball gripping it with both hands and pulling it close as she rolled onto the ground. Oof, that hurt a bit. She gritted her teeth as she sat up, the thing was biting and scratching at her but she wouldn’t let go. “Oh, you little shit.” She leaned forward and took a bite herself, causing the thing to screech and drop the bracelet. Julie felt it drop on her lap and let go, throwing it off to the side. Spitting, she picked it up, and held it out to Bea. “Please tell me this is it.”

Bea watched, fascinated as Julie sprinted and rolled while grabbing the thing. She would have never done that, too worried about how much it would hurt coming out of the roll. “Holy crap,” She whispered as she watched Julie bite the thief. She supposed that that worked, but again, it would have never been her course of action. Pausing in front of Julie, she watched as the thief ran away from them, apparently over the whole chase. Nodding, she grinned,“Yes. That is.” She took it from Julia and slipped it on,“It’s priceless and it matches with my sisters. I couldn’t lose it, you know?”

Julie got up, panting. Why did she put that much effort over a stupid bracelet? Maybe there were ulterior motives… or maybe Julie just cared that much for family mementos. Pftt. “So,” she said once she got her breathing under control. “You’re welcome, by the way.  I not only tackled that shit down but I bit him. Tasted it in my mouth and everything. I don’t think anything will wash that taste out now.” She spit off to the side before looking back at Bea. “Am I gonna get a thank you?” She teased, brow raised, wondering just how Bea was going to thank her for retrieving this priceless gift of much importance. Julie had her own idea of how Bea could do it.

“Oh, sorry!” Bea hurried to say,“Thank you. It just is like… It isn’t just a bracelet.” It was the literal key to their home and anyone who wore it would be able to get into her house and even her room. If she had lost it and someone had figured out what it was… She didn’t want to think about how hard it would be to get it back or make sure they couldn’t get into the house. While she wanted to sweep Julie off her feet and show her a good time, the adrenaline of the situation was draining and now she felt drained. “Can I rain check the thank you? Not going to lie, running after drinks kind of made me not feel the best.”

Without her fire magic, Bea felt vulnerable. The weapons that Felix had given her helped ease some of the anxiety she had struggled with. While he was teaching her to use them, Bea was sure it couldn’t hurt to ask other people for help as well. Kaden had led her into the woods and Bea had to force down the anxiety building in her. She had once claimed these woods as a place of sanctuary and now she looked over her shoulders for monsters, human and otherwise. As she shook the tension out of her shoulders, she looked over to Kaden,“So where do we start?”

Kaden never had trouble picking through the woods to find the clearing in the woods by the outskirts. It was a near perfect spot for training, but it was becoming more and more loaded. Blanche, Mina, and now Bea. There was no way this was going to go smoothly and easily. At least this time he expected it to go poorly. He was ready to stop training and go get some food at any minute. But Bea asked him for help and as sure as he was that this would go south or derail, he was going to help her as best as he could. “Well first off, I think we start with a pistol. You know how to load it? All that? If not, that’s where we start.” Every part of him wanted to ask how she was, talk about… everything, but that’s not what she came here for. He could tap into hunter mode for her if that’s what she needed. It wouldn’t be like Blanche.

There was only so much in the world that Bea could control. For years she had clung to this false sense of control she had over people and the world. She had thought that nothing bad would happen if she was the one pulling the strings. And yet she had still died. Bea still struggled with that control, she still wanted it so badly. This was one of her ways to control things around her. She could control what she was able to do and had to hope that everything else worked out in her favor. “Felix showed me when he gave me my gun, yeah. I figured coming to you would be a good idea too.” Why not go to all the people she knew to help her when it came to protecting herself. “I haven’t gotten much practice though. Not with everything that’s been happening the last few months, Felix and I have been so busy.”

His brow raised when he heard that she already had her own gun. Kaden didn’t know a whole lot about Felix but he supposed it wasn’t too hard to imagine the man knew where to acquire a gun and had no qualms handing one to Bea. He had helped them blow up a restaurant and had easy enough access to supernatural (and likely non supernatural) drugs, made sense he was comfortable enough with firearms. “Good, guess we can skip those basics, then.” He led her over to the line up of bottles and got her set up to start. “Yeah, makes sense. Look, at least I know this can’t go as badly as when I was out here with Blanche. Right after--” The words caught in his throat. He’d almost forgotten why he crumbled the last time he had been out here teaching someone to shoot. It was almost easy to do so when part of the reason had seemingly been erased and was standing right next to him.

“Don’t make that face,” Bea laughed. “He gave me a knife too. It makes me feel safer when I’m out without him, my sisters, or you.” She couldn’t spend her whole life attached at the hip to one of them. She was far too independent for that and she refused to be a burden to her loved ones like that. Bea watched Kaden with rapt attention as he helped her set up. She had been taught some things, yes, but she wasn’t comfortable with a gun in her hand yet. She was sure that would come with time and practice. As he cut himself off, she turned to look at him,“Right after what?” Her chest tightened as she wondered if she had been the reason that things had gone poorly last time. It worsened when she thought that maybe he hadn’t been telling her things because he didn’t think she could handle them anymore.

“Sorry, I’m used to you requesting my weapons at the door and shit. This is new.” Kaden didn’t know if that meant it was worse. Hell, he was different than he was when they first met, there was no denying that. And he didn’t fucking know if that mad him better or worse yet. Guess they’d find out together. Kaden was prepared to get lost in training, just sink back into his old rhythm, no emotions, just everything he knew black and white. That was until she pressed him. He froze and clenched his jaw, trying to keep back the lump forming in his throat already. Maybe this clearing was bad luck. “You know,” he said. He didn’t want to say it aloud. But no, he had to. Because it wasn’t just her death, that wasn’t the only weight that had crushed him those few weeks and it came rushing back like a tidal wave. He let out a breath and elaborated. “Right after I had to banish my mother’s spirit. And then you died. And then Celeste died.” The words hung in the air a moment, nothing but silence around them. Not even the birds seemed to cut the quiet. “Come on. We came here to shoot things.” He refused to break down here a second time.

“I might still request that if you annoy me,” Bea replied with a smirk. She knew for a fact she wouldn’t. No, now weapons weren’t just annoyances that she wanted to avoid, they were security and a way to feel safe. She didn’t look at a blade with contempt any longer, now, as long as it was held by a trusted friend, she saw an out. She had come unprepared to that fight with the Hunter and if she had had a gun on her rather than relying on her magic solely she might have survived. She reached out to him, a hand softly placed on his arm. She hadn’t touched him so freely in months. It had felt unnatural to her then, but she had slowly started to come back into herself. “Right after you lost everyone,” She summarized after a moment. “Thank you for coming back here then.” She didn’t want to consider how much it took out of him to be here after all of that. She nodded, “Right, we’re here to shoot.” She made sure that everything was out of the way before going for her first shot. As the ring of the gun rolled through that clearing, Bea couldn’t help but think over Kaden’s words again. She had never considered owning a gun before. She had thought of them as loud, inelegant things. Now she clung to one as a lifeline. Blinking rapidly, Bea tried to ignore the burn in her eyes. She hadn’t come here to mourn over parts of herself she had lost.

“Sure. I think you just want to be the only one with a knife at dinner.” Kaden wasn’t sure the joke landed. Dinners at the Vural’s hadn’t happened since, well, since any of it. It made sense. But it was a clear line between before and after. That line that was always drawn between memories. Before and after loss. It was like the color was different in his mind every time. The memories before with Bea had been warm tinted, nothing but warmth. Things had changed. He thought he was just imagining it, simply remembering some moment until he noticed that her hand was actually on his shoulder. He felt tears pricking the corners of his eyes already. It was still strange to remember all the grief of when she was dead when she was standing there in front of him. Honestly, it made him feel  a little silly, like he’d wasted time being upset when-- “It’s the best place I’ve found to shoot,” he replied simply, swallowing it all back, the lump in his throat, any threat of tears, any uncomfortable emotion. Deep inhale, slow exhale as he watched her set up. Funny, she should be the one trying to clear her head, she was the one shooting. She squared up, took a decent shot. “Not bad. You need to watch your stance, though,” he said. All he could think of was his mother, her words and how she would shut down and mask any feeling when it came time to perfect hunting skills. And she did in fact expect perfection or something close to it. Did he really want to be that? He tried to roll his shoulders back, push it away. Then he saw Bea. Properly. “You alright? We can stop at any time.”

“Can you blame me for that?” Bea asked with a grin. She hadn’t had anyone over for dinner in months and at the mention of it, she missed it. She missed making their favorite foods and forcing them to take home leftovers so they didn’t have to cook the next day. “I should have people over for dinner soon,” She said quietly, half to herself. It would be nice to have people in the house again. Maybe it would get rid of the cold feeling that had taken over the house. If she was lucky, it would start thawing out the relationships she had too. She had noticed, of course, how people interacted with her now. How they saw her as someone new and didn’t know how to be around her anymore. Kaden had gotten better as they saw each other more, but she had felt it the first time they saw each other after everything. She felt it with so many people now, even those who didn’t know. She lowered the pistol, looking at the bottles she shot at. “I never wanted to shoot a gun before,” She said softly. “Now I own one and I didn’t even think about it until now.”

“You should,” Kaden replied. It rang a little hollow. The last time he’d been in her house was when Nell told him. He hadn’t believed it. Putain. He thought he was over it. He should be over it. She was back. It was fine. So why did the thought of stepping back into the Vural house, seeing her kitchen, hit him like a ton of bricks? He sniffed and brushed off his cheek. He knew it wasn’t raining, but he was going to pretend that was the reason for the drop there. “It’d be good to, uh, you know, reset or something. Replace all the negative moments that happened when you were gone.” He knew she’d been a ghost but he had no idea how much she had really been around, how much she had really seen. This was a bad idea. This whole endeavor. Everything was too emotionally charged. He should have known better. “Hey. It’s alright.” Kaden reached out and touched her shoulder, hoping to steady them both, ground them. “Things change.”

“It’s hard to know how to start with that. Blanche hasn’t seen me in months, we used to be close you know? Lots of people have these memories of mourning me and I don’t know how to stop that. I don’t know how to fix it anymore.” Hadn’t she always been able to find a way to fix things? Bea was stuck, not knowing where to begin when it came to reintroducing herself to people she loved. There was no handbook for dealing with the trauma of being dead for weeks, of mourning yourself. There was no road map for her friends and family to know how to deal with her being back. So instead of anything being better, they were all stuck stagnant hoping that one day things will feel better on its own. They all ignore the implication that these things took work and contact, unwilling to be the first to reach out and force something that was once natural.

It took cool, measured movements for Bea to place everything down safely. She wasn’t going to sacrifice gun safety just because she was feeling a little bit bluer than she anticipated. She had thought that this would make her feel powerful, make her feel better than she had walked in with. Yet, here she was, hands shaking as she realized just how charged the air had become after a single shot. She looked toward Kaden, one of the only people who knew and still tried to make this work. “Do they usually change this much? I know I’m like a different person. I know everyone’s been thinking it. I’m a stranger to everyone now,” Her lips pressed, eyes filling up again as she blinked angrily. “I used to be warm and alive.” How one sentence, thought but rarely spoken aloud, could make Bea feel like the world was pressing down on her shoulders was a mystery. She sniffed, trying to ignore the ache of her chest. “I thought I was getting better,” She whispered, sorrow pouring over each word as she looked down at her hands. She had been smiling more, laughing more, and a single shot brushed it away. It nearly brought her to her knees.

“She hasn’t?” Kaden couldn’t imagine. The first thing he wanted to do when he heard about Bea coming back was see her. Then again, he hadn’t seen her since before she died. And wasn’t there for the hard part. Of any of it. Maybe it did make some sense that Blanche needed time. “You can’t stop it, Bea. And it won’t--” The mourning had happened and it was confusing to have to step back, forget it. It couldn’t be erased. Standing where he had collapsed so soon after she-- It couldn’t be erased from his mind nor the pain scrubbed from his heart. Her sisters had to have felt it all, stronger and deeper. Still, the mourning hadn’t hit him as hard as one word, one singular word she’d said. The same stupid word he kept saying, kept promising. “Fix.” How did she fix this? “You don’t need to fix it, Bea. Sometimes you can’t--” Kaden wasn’t sure what pain was pooling up from the depths, which stupid shit was punching him in the gut. He told Regan he’d help fix her. He told Nadia he’d help fix her. Could he lie to Bea, too?

“I don’t know. Most times I lose people and they don’t come back.” It was meant to be a joke, but the tears burned his eyes almost instantly. He blinked them away as best he could. He shook his head and met her eyes. “I don’t give a shit if you’re the exact same person, Bea, I don’t. You’re here. You’re still here and, and--” Kaden reached out to take her hand, turning it over in his. It was shaking, he could feel it, but he also held his hand to her wrist and pressed against her pulse. “You feel that? You’re alive. You’re alive.” Something he could still barely believe. He could feel more stupid tears tumbling down his cheeks and he wished he could just look at her and see his friend and not have to be reminded of all the fucking trauma that they’d all gone through. “You’re not a stranger, Bea. You’re not. You-- you were there for me every time I asked. Sometimes when I fucking didn’t. So maybe now it doesn't show up the same.” Like her magic, it was changed, there was no denying it. “But I haven’t doubted that fact once. Not once. Tell me if I’m wrong. Fucking tell me if you don’t have my back anymore. But I have yours. I’m not walking away because shit’s a little different.”

“I can’t blame her for not wanting to see me. I asked way too much of her with everything. I promised to never be one of those people who put that much pressure on her, but I ended up breaking that promise.” Bea got flashbacks every once in a while of Blanche asking her not to do something as a ghost and Bea ignoring her. She knew that Blanche was under so much stress already and she had still pulled her into the mess. So many people had disappointed Blanche and Bea had never wanted to add her name to that list, but she had. She took in a staggering breath, “I have always been able to fix my mistakes. I’ve been able to fix how people look at me, how they see me, but I don’t know how to anymore and I’ve always had to.” How many times had her mother drilled it into her head that she had to be perfect to everyone? Bea’s entire life had been built upon always fixing the mistakes that made her appear weak or flawed. Now for months she had been that to everyone around her. It was easy to forget sometimes, easy to slip into this person that didn’t care. She couldn’t decide who she was anymore, between those people. Caring what they thought had shaped her entire life, but letting go of that and being someone that could be feared instead of loved had become something of an armor. There were days where it felt like there were two Beas, both trying to control her body and she didn’t know what to do or even who she was.

According to the Council, she never should have come back. To them, she should have moved on and never brought people into her plan. She didn’t know if that would have been easier for everyone, but there was no going back. She couldn’t fix the fracture she had created in her family. Her eyes squeezed shut as he held her wrist, tears slipping from between tightly held lids. She could feel it. She could feel her heart. She could feel his fingers pressed against her skin. “I’m alive. I can feel it.” She was alive, so why didn't she feel like it. Why did she feel so strange? This had gotten better in last month, but still there were some days that Bea felt as though she could fade away if no one was looking. She leaned her head forward as sobs started to shake her. “I have your back,” She told him, her voice choked. “I have everyone’s backs. I do.” She would do anything for the people she loved. She had always been willing to do anything for them. It was perhaps the only thing she had in common with the woman she was in May.

The words hit him like another gut punch, of a different variety this time. Kaden couldn’t argue with her. But he also couldn’t say he didn’t put too much on Blanche either. Hell the last time he was here, he’d put way too much on her. All his grief had come spilling out and she was left to pick up the pieces. “Maybe so but I doubt she’d ever take it back.” Kaden would have to remember just how much of a break Blanche needed, maybe force her to take it. For now, he had his friend in front of him, desperately hoping for a way to fix things, a feeling he knew all too well. But he didn’t have a clue where to start. He tried to let the words sink in. “Had to,” that’s what she’d said. All he could remember was her obsessing over what to wear to the Silver Bullet, how concerned she was about how people saw her, even just to go visit a hunter bar. “You don’t have to be perfect, Bea. You can make mistakes and let the cards fall.”

Kaden had every intention of dropping his hand from her wrist, but it lingered. Feeling her heartbeat beneath his fingers, pulsing through her skin, it was something so simple, but god it was unreal right then. He knew before it that she was alive and back, sure, he knew, Something so simple as a pulse pulled things into perspective. Reminded him that it wasn’t a dream. “Good. That’s good. You-- you believe it, right?” He gave her hand a squeeze before letting his own fall away. “You know if you fall, I’m going to be there as best as I can. I don’t know much, but I know that. Your sisters will be there, too. It doesn’t matter if you’re perfect as long as you’re here. It’s enough, Bea. You’re enough.” Kaden was damn sure she didn’t need to hear it from him of all people, if at all, but here he was in the middle of the woods telling her anyway like some big idiot. He’d be fucking lying if he said he didn’t wish he could go back to having the Bea who had never died, had never had to go through all that, come back from the dead, have his friend back. The one who was able to pull him off the edge, force him to see the bigger picture. But he didn’t honestly believe there was nothing left of her, nothing of her that wasn’t his friend before. If he was the one to have pull her off the edge for once, so be it.

Kaden was right and Bea knew it, no matter what had happened she was sure that Blanche wouldn’t take it back. The medium was the type of person who gave far too much of herself to the people around her. Blanche was far too good for a person who struggled like she did. Bea hated that she had put anymore weight onto Blanche’s shoulders. Her mouth tightened, flattening into a line. She had always needed to be perfect. Even as a child she had woken up hours before school just to perfect the way her hair fell, by twelve she had been using makeup. There had been little room for anything less than perfect. She had obsessed over it, just to make her mother happy. And even though she had been as perfect as she could be, there was nothing that stopped the way her life had gone. She had still died and she was still kicked out of her coven, even though she had tried to seem perfect. “I don’t just let things fall, Kaden. I’m meant to be the one who doesn’t make mistakes. I should be the one fixing things for my sisters, not the other way around.” She had never been the person who needed this much help and she could barely understand that she was the person she was. “My mistakes ruined my sisters’ lives. We were excommunicated because of the ritual.”

She nodded. She did believe she was alive, but she didn’t know how long that would last. She didn’t know what next would set her off or if anyone would be there to help ground her. As much as she tried to do it herself, without someone else it was so difficult to remind herself that she wasn’t going to fade away. But even when she knew that she wasn’t going to fade away, she felt like an imposter. Trying to fill your own shoes was much harder than anyone had ever said. Being enough didn’t sit right with her, not when she wanted to be more, but her options were limited, especially with how she was now. A comparison struck her and a watery, half-hearted laugh broke out, “I’m having a fucking mid life crisis right now, aren’t I?” The humor of the thought warmed her chest slightly and slowed her tears, but didn’t rid the field of the melancholy feel. She cast her eyes to the sky, humming softly in her throat. “There are these parts of myself that are broken apart and I don’t know how to bring them back together. I don’t know where the whole me is and for now all I have are these fragments of what I am.”

“Says fucking who? Who told you you can’t make mistakes? Fuck them. They don’t--” The words excommunicated cut through his tirade like a knife, the word hanging in the air, almost ringing through the silence of the forest surrounding them. Kaden had lost his family through unfortunate circumstances. They didn’t choose to leave him, not really. He knew that hunters stuck together through thick and thin, short lived as their lives may be. He couldn’t imagine choosing to cut ties, purposely giving up on someone for their choices, choices that seemed like the sole choice available. “You didn’t ruin their lives,” was all he could mumble. “I saw them when you were gone, Bea. They didn’t-- Coming back didn’t ruin their lives.” He wasn’t sure what it did ruin fully yet, it definitely disrupted things, but ruin? It was the wrong word, he felt that deep in his core. It was the wrong word. Bea being alive couldn’t ruin anything. “I’m sorry.” She didn't deserve this, not from family. None of the sisters did. They needed support, not abandonment.

Watching his friend break down, Kaden felt picks sting at the corner of his eyes. Shit like this he always wished he could be more helpful, say the right things, solve problems. He was never sure he quite managed. “I think technically speaking it’s a post-life crisis,” he added with a half hearted smile, glad for the momentary respite from the heaviness. Kaden reached out and gripped her shoulder, hoping to steady both of them a little more. He could feel the warmth of her skin, her pulse pumping through, much faster than Regan’s did now. Funny how despite dying, she felt more alive than his own girlfriend. And here she was questioning that fact. “I don’t think I’m the one to tell you how to solve all that,” he said with a sigh. Her words sounded all too familiar. “Hunting used to make sense. It’s, I mean everything is confusing now. And I feel like who I want to be isn’t who I was. Or am. Or wanted to be before or--” He shook his head, trying to find what he was even saying anymore. “My point is I’m fucking lost, too. I think-- I think that’s okay. Pick the pieces you like. Leave the rest.” He knew it was easier said than done, but it sure sounded nice.

Silence had become an unfortunate companion of Bea’s. As a ghost it had been the only thing that kept her company and now it stretched between her and the people she loved. There wasn’t much anyone could say when Bea talked about how far her life had crumbled. As Kaden’s silence sat between them, her heart began to ache for him. He was trying so hard to make her feel better about something that only she could fix. Laying her hand on his arm, she squeezed softly, knowing that it would do little to rid the sorrow she was sure he was feeling for her. She couldn’t agree that she didn’t ruin her sisters’ lives, but she decided not to argue now. Not when the energy she had left in her was waning. “They basically called me a monster at the trial and my mom let them.” Her mouth was dry,“She used to call me her star and she let go of me so easily. She wasn’t always good to my sisters, but she had always been good to me.”

It took her a moment, but Bea let out a loud, watery laugh. “Post-life crisis. Holy Hell, I’m having a post-life crisis,” She got out between her laughter. As heavy as she felt now, at least she knew that she wasn’t the only person who wasn’t sure what to do with their lives now. The unending loneliness she had felt when she was dead, and had carried on as she finally lived again, had slowly begun to peel away. “Well, at least we have good company for this. Good to know that neither of us are sure who we are anymore,” She tried to say it lightly, but the crack in her voice betrayed how hard that was to say. Leave the rest. She wasn’t sure she could do that, she hadn’t ever been good at just leaving things be. It felt impossible to admit that things would never be the same again, but maybe one day she would be able to. She had conquered the impossible before.

“I’m so sorry, Bea.” As she gave his arm a small squeeze, Kaden wished with everything he had that he wasn’t complete shit at comforting people. All he could manage was to place his own hand on top of hers and squeeze it back. He couldn’t think of his friend as a monster, not ever. The thought that her mother could even imply it was, it was unfathomable. For every piece of his parents that he had begun to pick at in his mind, he never once doubted that they loved him. Disappointment, that he could predict form them, even disowning him. But he felt deep in his bones they’d try to bring him back into the fold before abandoning him. Given the choice. “None of you deserve that. Not after--” Not after the harrows they went through. Her mother wasn’t even there to see it, to feel the pain and the loss. Maybe it was better she didn’t. He didn’t know. He supposed it didn’t matter much now how well or how little he knew her mother, she wasn’t going to be a huge part of their lives much anymore, was she? “Just because she-- I’m not letting go that easily, got it? I don’t have--” He couldn’t say it. He didn’t want to feel the sting of the words piercing through him, saying aloud that he didn’t really have any family left. And it felt almost cruel to bring up in comparison. But still, all the dinners at Bea’s house, it felt like so long ago now but some part of Bea felt like family. He couldn’t explain it. It didn’t matter if he could put it into words, though. He could feel it. “You’re just stuck with me, alright. You made the mistake of making me give a shit. No getting rid of me now.” One more squeeze before he let his hand drop.

“You sure are,” he said, laughing with her, drinking in the short lived moment of relief from the heaviness of the rest of their exchange. He knew damn well that if a younger version of himself saw who he was now, he’d be confused and shocked. No doubt it would be worse for her. “Guess so,” he said, exhaling, hoping it would mask the small pricks of terror in his voice at the thought of changing so much. “You think I can blame this on you?” he said, nudging her with his elbow. “I mean, you had me real confused in the beginning, thinking you were a werewolf. I don’t know, maybe this whole change shit is your fault. Ever think of that?” He played but honestly? She was part of it. Not as directly as some, but having people that he cared about it-- well it was different than his life had been before. He let out another deep sigh and rubbed the back of his neck. “What do you say we try this again another day and just go to Al’s or something? Blanche swears the milkshakes help. I think she just likes tormenting me.”

Kaden wasn’t sure what else there was to find at Coffee Plus Plus, the night after there was hardly anything weirder than a broken umbrella and the server he talked to was hardly helpful. But he was out of leads and going a little out of his mind. He was glad he wasn’t going to be here alone though. Seeing Bea walking and talking was something fucking surreal. Even more so than the current predicaments they were dealing with in regards to their respective partners. “Hey,” he said as she walked up to the coffee shop. “Glad you could come.” Really glad she was breathing, too. He wasn’t over it. Not sure when he would be. If that ever happened. She had mentioned that she felt different, changed. Which made sense, she had died after all. But he thought he could almost see it. He couldn’t say what it was. By all accounts, save for the fact she was covering her neck, she looked the same. There was no denying she wasn’t, though. “Is Felix doing alright?” He wanted to ask about her, too, if she was alright. But he still didn’t really know how to talk to har about… that. The not being dead thing. Not yet.

Bea knew she shouldn’t have expected a quiet week, there was no such thing in White Crest, but she had hoped for it. She wanted a quiet month. Time to refocus herself and figure out how she fit back in the world. Instead, she got a message from her boyfriend telling her that he was a giant, naked and wandering the forest. She could roll with it, she had to. It was, in a way, a relief that Kaden was dealing with this and Regan, though at least Regan was tiny and able to stay inside. Slowly, the exhaustion that she felt when she first came back was easing off her. Thank god for that. She wasn’t sure if she would have been able to meet up with Kaden if it was still as bad as it was before. She paused before Kaden, taking him in for a moment. A memory tugged at the back of her brain, hazy enough to know that it was from when she had been a ghost. It seemed like she had decided to go on a walk with Kaden and Abel, though that was unknown to them at the time. “It’s good to see you,” She told him as she considered whether or not he would want a hug from her. Touch was something that she had given out easily before, but now it was far more intimate. She used it to remind herself that she was alive. She felt wooden now, just as she had with the others she saw recently. They all expected something from her. They all waited with bated breath to see if she was different. “Well, he’s scared a few bears out of a cave and is hanging out in there until we find a solution. He’s doing as well as he can considering he’s naked in a cave and can’t go outside .” She sighed, this was not how she imagined her first couple of weeks being with Felix like. Hanging out with him, naked, in a cave when he’s three times her height was just not in the plan. Her hand flexed,“It’s the first time I’ve had to sleep alone since I came back, so it’s been a learning curve.” She hadn’t imagined that she would be so codependent on her relationship so soon, but she supposed getting beheaded could do that to a person. “How’s Regan? And you?”

It was strange seeing Bea and not feeling her warmth, her pulling him into a hug whether he wanted it or not. Kaden was too unsure to push it. Talking about what was happening now was so much easier than touching on anything that had come before. “It’s a little better to see you,” he said with a small smile. Strange to think this was the second friend he’d seen walking and talking post-mortem now. “He scared bears out of a cave?” It was so absurd, he had to laugh. The whole thing was crazy. It was draining and exhausting but, putain, it was funny in its own way. In that way that if he didn’t laugh, they both might cry a little. “What a fucking crash course to get on dating in White Crest right out of the gate.” His heart sunk watching her. She had enough to deal with right now. This was unfair. Come back from the fucking dead, let the woman have a normal week. As much as he wanted that normal, no supernatural, no nonsense of any sort moment for him and Regan, the kind they hadn’t had in so long now, he’d give it to Bea and Felix in a heartbeat. “You’ve been staying with him this whole time, huh? You know after the-- And before...” He found himself offering her a bit of a sly smile and gave her a small nudge with his elbow. Sure, it sucked knowing she was hurting now, but it was nice to know his friend had found something good in all this shit. This town was a tough place to find it. “I’ve been better. Can’t sleep much. I mean I don’t think they’ll stay like-- But what if--” He shook it off and led them over to the table where he’d found Regan’s clothes the other day. There was nothing damaged or even dented or scratched. The umbrella that was a little worse for wear last time he’d been there was perfectly in place. It was off-putting. He wanted to find a scene. Fucking anyting helpful. “Regan’s screaming. A lot. Thankfully it’s not too bad at her current size. And she’s insisting she should go back to work.” He could feel the stress of all this creeping back in, weighing on him again. “So you know, she’s her.”

Five weeks without her had to have been jarring for those who had seen her constantly before this. Bea couldn’t imagine how strange it must have been for all of them. She was sure it was terrible for them all leading up to the ritual. She shrugged slightly, unsure of how to reply now. Her mouth was dry, this was strange. She had never really struggled to be around Kaden, at least not like this, but here she was unsure of what to say or do. “He can’t be out in the daylight and the only caves that are big enough for him right now were one’s bears like. It was really the only option.” She offered him a small smile, dating in White Crest was always a ride, but she had never dealt with this with her last boyfriend. Felix was worth the effort though, even if it was one of the stranger things she was doing. Kaden’s elbow got a snort out of her,“Yeah, well, when I got out of the hospital I went to his first thing. I might have admitted I was in love with him when I was a ghost. Thought he needed to hear it in person.” She looked at him for a long moment, before smirking a bit,“I didn’t expect the first time I got to see him naked being when he’s fifteen-foot tall, but that’s how it is in White Crest huh?” She understood Kaden’s concern, she had thought of what would happen if they were stuck like this forever, but she was certain they’d find a solution. She figured if she could come back from the dead, she could find a way to bring her boyfriend back to a normal height. She considered attempting to make things normal and offer him some calming words, but it felt weird to now. It didn’t come naturally to her anymore. Her eyebrows furrowed,”This is where it happened? Why does it look normal?” It didn’t make sense. She let out a frustrated huff of air. Couldn’t White Crest be normal for once and let a scene be a scene. “What’s she going to do at work? Crawl in the bodies? Seems a little stupid to go back to work.”

Kaden wasn’t really sure who had it worse, Regan or Felix. He was also really fucking sure it didn't matter right now. “Well hopefully we can find something today and then no more caves and no more tissue boxes for either of them.” Kaden had been leaned over the table, looking for anything remotely helpful when she mentioned “love.” His head shot up to look at her, eyes wide. “You told him you loved him as a ghost?” He was definitely shocked but a small smile was present on his face. “I don’t know if that counts as moving fast or slow considering you were kind of dead. But uh, yeah, that’s one of the more White Crest ways to first see someone naked.” Shit, he knew this was probably hard on her but if she cared about Felix that much, had to be even worse. At least a little of the rhythm of their friendship was back, rocky and unsteady as it felt so far. It was still hard to remove himself from all the grief he’d felt in that month every time he looked at her and to not just worry how she was doing.  

“Looks like we’re not going to find anything here,” he said with a sigh and waved her inside with him. Maybe they’d have better luck there. As soon as Kaden stepped through the door, he saw her. The face from the carnival. “You!” He said as he charged right towards her. “You want to explain yourself?” Her laugh came out like chirps. “I have no idea what you’re talking about, hon. But take a seat and I can take your order. Let me guess, a large for him and a small for her.” Kaden narrowed his eyes at her and decided they should play ball and take a seat at one of the tables. Worth a shot.

“Apparently death put things in perspective for me.” Bea did wish that it had been different for them. Felix should have gotten more than a dead almost lover telling him she loved him over a make shirt ouija board. “The kind of dead part makes me think that even if it was fast, it’s okay.” This was easy for her, chatting about things that simply just happened instead of trying to talk about how she had been a corpse only two weeks ago. As she followed Kaden in, she simply watched him charge the woman with a dull expression. She wasn’t going to get involved in Kaden’s fight with the waitress, she thought as she adjusted the collar of her white turtleneck, he could handle himself. She really needed to go shopping soon, all she had now was red and the thought of the color made her stomach roll. She raised an eyebrow at the woman,“No. I’ll take a large coffee with a splash of milk, please.” Looking towards Kaden, she tapped her fingers against the table idly, disappointed by the lack of anything helpful. “What did she do to you?”

Kaden had always believed life should end with death. But he also had never been faced with a real opportunity for anyone he cared about to come back from the dead. Not really. Having her back... it was complicated. More than he imagined. He was happy to see her but the shift in her and everything else, it just set a pit in his stomach. He tried not to let the worry settle in, not while they were here. “You’ve got a point. I think you may have out done me and Regan on the melodrama for first I love you’s, though. Which really I’m all for. Morgan was about to submit ours for a made for tv movie or something I’m sure.” Had he even gotten to tell her about everything with his mother? Fuck. He didn’t. It felt stupid to bring up now or even fill her in. It was-- It hardly compared.

It was odd to see Bea sit on the sidelines. By no means did he need her to step in to help him, but she usually did. Butting in was sort of what she did. Whether he liked it or not. And usually he hadn’t but now he was really missing it. His brow creased as he looked at her, almost hoping he could spot a glimpse of his friend before she had been changed forever. She was still there. She had to be. It was still Bea. “Not much. She ran the carnival game that I played when I went with Regan. I won and she gave me a mime plush. With wings.” The thought alone made him roll his eyes. “She said some bullshit about how Regan shouldn’t be dating a human. Crap like that.” Kaden bit the inside of his lip. He hated thinking about that shit. What if she had a point? There was no way they had a long term future, right? Why bother? Before he could even shake it away himself, the waitress came back. “Here’s your coffee,” the fae said with a wink. He noticed she had a set of glasses resting on her head. They were Broken. Before he could ask any questions, she was walking away. “What the fuck, did you see those?” he asked Bea.

“Well, I’ve always had a flare for the dramatic. Just ask my sisters. It was good for work.” Bea said lightly, though she fitted Kaden with a critical look,“You didn’t tell me the story of your’s.” She had to wonder if it had come up while she had been a ghost. It would make sense that she didn’t get to hear about it because of that, but it still left her with a sour taste in her mouth. She had missed so much when she had died. She had no idea how much more she would find out she missed, but she wasn’t looking forward to seeing how much things had changed since she had been gone.

“The mimes strike against you once again. Have you considered maybe that in a past life you were cursed by the first mime? It would make sense.” Her delivery was rather deadpan, but her eyes sparkled with the joke. It was getting easier to talk to her friend now. It was getting easier to be the new version of herself now. Her expression soured then. So she was one of those types. “Sounds like a bitch.” She wrapped her hand around her cup with a quick thank you, before she followed Kaden’s eyes to the woman again. Those were Felix’s. She was standing and moving to cut in front of the woman without replying. A sharp look had taken over her face now. “Excuse me, did you happen to find those glasses here? My boyfriend recently lost a pair exactly like that and we’d like them back.”

“Yeah, can’t deny that.” Kaden hadn’t wanted to dwell on just how much had happened that he didn’t get to talk with his friend about. As much as he desperately wanted to while she was gone, it felt so hollow and shallow to him to dump all his shit on her. After everything. He took a deep breath. She asked, though. “So my mother came back as a poltergeist. Which was a great time. She tried to kill Regan then tried to kill me. It all sort of spilled out after that. A little during. It was also right after she screamed for--” For you. For Bea’s death. He wondered if he had connected the pieces sooner if maybe-- That was stupid. There was no changing fate. There was no going back. And either way she was back. It was all fine in the end.

“Very funny. Yes. The Langley legacy in fact has nothing to do with hunting and all to do with mime curses.” Joking with her was nice, simple. It felt right. Even if she wasn’t quite the same Bea from before. She was still her. And maybe now she wouldn’t blush at curse words. Why did that make him feel a ping of sadness? Before he knew what was happening, she had stood and followed the waitress. Guess those glasses were important after all. “Oh did he? How weird,” the waitress said, pulling them off her head to examine them. They were cracked and a little bent but she shrugged like they were still perfectly usable. “Your boyfriend, hmm? Do you mean that one over there?” the waitress said looking back at Kaden. “I don’t think so. He’s into mimes, you know. And seems to move on fast. You’d better be careful, sweetie.” Kaden rolled his eyes and stood up. “She’s not talking about me,” he said, growing more and more annoyed with this fae by the minute. “But I’m pretty fucking sure those aren’t your glasses. So hand them over. And tell us what you did.” Her chirping laughter made his skin crawl. “Are you sure? They’re in my possession. I think that makes them mine. And I haven’t done anything. Other than bring you coffee. Does it taste alright? I can always remake it if I need to. The ratios might not be right, you know. I could have sworn you preferred a small,” she told him with a smirk. If he could get away with it, he would have leapt at her and torn into her. Instead he settled for digging his nails into his palm as his hand balled into a fist, knuckles growing white.

A laugh nearly bubbled out of Bea as she listened to Kaden. Of course it happened like that because how else would anything happen in White Crest. Her face screwed up a bit as she tried to keep a bitter smile off her face. God, none of them could catch a break. Maybe they should all have a vacation after this is done. They deserved to be away from the bullshit. They earned the peace, even if it was just for a day. “Wow. Your’s is pretty close to being as messed up as mine is. I guess that comes with the territory of dating fae, huh?” She was sure that all those in the supernatural had some strange dating experiences, but she was also very positive that it would compare to the stories that her and Kaden had with this all.

Her eyes narrowed at the waitress and she stepped closer, glaring down at the woman. This was one reason she enjoyed wearing heels constantly, it gave her even more of a presence. She stood at six foot most of the time when she wore her heels and she understood how that changed her interactions. “I don’t think I’m the person who should be careful right now, sweetie,” She replied as her fists clenched. Without realizing it, her magic was flaring and shadows began to pool at her feet. Even if she had noticed, she wouldn’t have understood what was happening. Her magic had never done this before. “I’m going to suggest that you remove them from your possession willingly. I’m not feeling very patient right now and if you aren’t careful, I’m going to take them myself.” Whoever this woman was, Bea was sure that she knew something and she intended on finding out what that was.

“Yeah it certainly wasn’t ideal, that’s for sure. But why expect anything normal in this town?” Kaden replied. Especially not when dating someone who was supernatural. It was amazing to him how often he forgot he was dating a fae, Regan hardly acted like one, bone collecting aside. Still had to wonder if he invited the weird by dating a non-human or just dating in this town. Both. Likely both. “I feel like we should start a fae partner support group at this point. Granted, pretty sure it wouldn’t be anything more than this. Getting coffee, swapping weird stories.” What more could they really do about it, anyway? Sort of had to just live with it. Or leave it, he supposed.

Then again, guess Bea could do something about it if her anger here was any indication. Kaden noticed some movement at her feet and when he looked down, there were dark swirls and shadows flooding in. Alright, then. “No need to blow this out of proportion now,” the waitress said with another chirping squeaky laugh , handing the glasses over to Bea. “Here you go, all yours. I hope they help lift your spirits a little. Toodles.” Kaden thought about flipping her the middle finger as she turned to leave, but it felt almost comically childish. Might have made him feel better, though. Especially right now when he felt so powerless to help at all. “You want to finish coffee or fuck off and get something stronger?” he asked his friend.

Nothing was normal in this town, but Bea had known that to some degree. The past few months had just hammered that point in. “It’ll be me, you, and Morgan at this point, but I think we all might need that sometimes.” Morgan probably was the most adjusted out of them all with this. Still, the witch was sure that Morgan had her fair share of strange things that happened in their relationship. As Bea’s hand curled around the glasses, disappointment pulsed through her. She had wanted a fight. She wanted to get to yell at this bitchy woman and let out all of the building frustration she had. It would have been even better if she had gotten to hit her. Placing the glass on her own head, she nodded at Kaden with a scowl on her face. “I think I need a few shots at this point,” She said, clenching her fist. If she didn’t find some outlet for her anger, she was rather sure she was going to explode. She ripped her purse from the table they were at and swiftly made her way out of the cafe.

“Right. Morgan.” Kaden hadn’t talked to her since the whole thing with that hungry zombie. He wondered if he even mattered to her anymore. So much for having shit in common. “I don’t know that she’ll agree to that anytime soon. Not with me, at least.” Not so long as some monster was more important to her than his well-being. Once the glasses were safely in Bea’s hands, Kaden threw some cash on the table; figured that covered it for the two coffees. “Let’s go, then,” he said as he led the out of the place, one last look at the fucking fae who gave a little wave as they left. “Definitely agree on the shots.” Once they were outside, he couldn’t shake the thought of the shadows and darkness around her. Magic around her wasn’t strange, but it was usually flames and fire. He knew she said it was out, different, whatever, but he hadn’t expected that. “What the hell was that back there?” he asked.

Bea eyed her friend then, she had no idea what happened between him and Morgan, but she was sure it was messy. Things in this town were always messy. There was never anything simple when the supernatural was mixed in. “She’s a forgiving person. Whatever happened will work out,” She told him, voice missing the warmth a sentence like that used to garner. Bea had to hold herself back from baring her teeth at the fae as she left. The rolling anger she had felt before hadn’t lifted yet. Heels clicked against the pavement as she strode quickly away from the coffee shop. “What was what back there?” She knew that Kaden hadn’t seen her quite so angry before, but she didn’t think her actions were so shocking. She got the glasses back and that had been the goal.

Kaden couldn’t hold back a laugh at her statement. “Yeah, sure. Guess we’ll see.” Forgiving. Right. The woman who reduce to fucking apologize for nearly getting him killed was real forgiving. He had to pick up his pace a little to keep up with her. It felt wrong to say she was heated given, uh, everything, but it was clear she was far angrier than he was. Likely only because he was too tired to fully process that he should in fact be quite that angry at the fae back there. “Really?” he asked again. “How about the shadow shit that happened. You know,” he said as he gestured around his knees like swirling cloud shadow magic. Or he tried to at least. He had to wonder if it was something to do with her coming back from the dead. Probably. He sighed and let it go. Likely she didn’t have a real explanation anyway. “Whatever, doesn’t matter. You can tell me over drinks. Or not. We can talk about whatever you want. Let’s go.”

After their conversation, Bea had felt the need to invite Kaden over to simply let them get back into their normal routine. She didn’t like that he hadn’t felt supported, but she supposed it made sense. Her sisters had said the same thing after she had given them her opinion. She had texted him promising good wine and food if he came over to give her an opinion on some tricks she was working on for her show. She’d usually ask her sisters, but with how busy they had been, she was outsourcing. Once Kaden had arrived to the house, she had ushered him to her back porch, poured him a generous glass of wine, and sat him down in one of her comfy chairs. “I promise I’ll feed you after this, I just need you to tell me two things: Are my tricks entertaining and will people be able to clock it as real magic?” She wasn’t always the best at telling if she was being too showy.

Kaden hadn’t wanted to be mad at Bea, not even a little. He wasn’t even sure he was. Everything happening just made it feel like raw nerves were spindingling out of him right now and any emotional upheaval was a fucking mess for him to process. And Bea was safe. Deep down he knew it would be nearly impossible to push her away so she got him at his worst. Not what he wanted to do and part of him worried he’d been wrong and had gone too far. So the invitation was more than welcome. Something calm and simple at the Vural house felt a bit like a warm blanket and he was appreciative that Bea was always a soft place to land. Hard truths and all. In person was easier to remember that sometimes. “Don’t worry, I never doubt that with you,” he said with a smile. He gave her a nod as he leaned back in the chair, glass of wine in hand, one leg crossed over the other. “Alright, do your worst. You know you’re asking someone who grew up knowing magic was real his whole life, too, right?”

Bea had to laugh, it was true that no one went into the Vural house and left without having had been feed at least once. “I had to say it! I promised food and I intend to make good on that promise.” After she said it, she realized that promise was probably not the best way to phrase it. She knew she should probably start trying to phase out the word promise, but it had been apart of her vocabulary for long she struggled to find something to fill the void. “I know!” She laughed as she went down to the lawn,“But you’ll be able to tell me better than I can tell me. Hope you’re ready, ignore how I lit them, I’d do it differently on stage.” She grinned, picking up her fire fans. Usually, she would make a show lighting it with a pre-existing flame, but here she just simply snapped her fingers and each prong was ablaze in seconds. She spun them a few times before throwing it up in the air, using her magic to flare out the fire in a dazzling display of light. She caught both in one hand before gracefully moving into a single-handed cartwheel. Doing a few more tricks with her fans, she ended by waving them in front of her face before arching back to look at the sky and breathed fire. She shook her fans, the flames going out as she did. Grinning up at Kaden, she put a hand to her hip,“So? Good or too showy?”

“You know, not a huge fan of the word promise anymore,” Kaden said with a half smile. “But a promise of food is one I think I can get behind.” Honestly, it was so comforting to know that Regan had made him swear off promises to her. The only promise bind he’d ever be comfortable with. The real smile came when he watched his friend perform. She was a natural entertainer, which was sometimes hard to remember with how she was off stage. Not that she wasn’t personable or bland by any means, just she never seemed like the type to crave attention with any sort of desperation that he assumed was necessary to want to put yourself out there on stage like that. He clapped when she was done. He sat back, though, had a moment where he crossed his arms in front of his chest and narrowed his eyes. “Hmm. That was fine. But only two fans?” He shook his head in mock critique. “Better step it up, Bea. Or someone might take that top spot.” He dropped the act and leaned forward again. “Looked good, though. Really. The breathing fire, though. You think people will buy it?”

“Such a complicated thing now,” Bea agreed, thinking of the promise she made to Regan. She had to be so careful in the kitchen now, having no desire to deal with the consequences again. She’d have to ask Regan to release her, though that was much easier said than done, considering how the woman felt about the supernatural. She climbed the stairs again, leaning against the railing. “Thought I would ease the crowd into the fans, but I’m sure I could handle three if I really wanted,” She called back with easy confidence. In the back of her mind, she wondered if she would be doing bigger, flashier tricks if she was in Vegas. “Bold of anyone to try to take the top spot from the owner, I would love to meet a performer who thought they were better than me.” The thing was, she knew one day someone would show and be better than her and that’s what made her constantly evolve and get better. She wouldn’t let them take her spot easily. With his genuine question, she shrugged,”If we were in any other town, I would say yes, but here people know way too much. With a witch hunter around I have to be more careful than usual. Think I should just take it out to be safe?”

Complicated described a lot more in Kaden’s life than just the word promise. But he knew they both knew as much and didn’t need to hash everything out all over again. And for once, he’d like the focus of their conversations not to be his never ending list of fuck ups. “Really?” he said, shaking his head a little. “And here I thought I was just being an asshole.” He shrugged, his voice teasing again. “I don’t know. You might have a performer that can use four fans.” The smile on his face dissipated at her next statement. The witch hunter. His mouth pulled into a thin line.With everything going on, he’d almost forgotten about the fucking witch hunter. “Yeah, I’d play it safe. Maybe make it look like you’re spitting oil or whatever it is people do without real magic.” His stomach still churned at the thought of losing Bea at the hands of a witch hunter. It was crazy to him that someone would look at her and see someone so dangerous she was worth killing. Sure, she was powerful as hell, he’d seen her fry those leprechauns out there in the woods, but she had control of her magic. The logic just didn't track for him. “She hasn’t-- you and your sisters have been careful, right?” He knew he should change the subject, but he couldn’t shake his concern that quickly. Not after the fucking way his life had been tracking recently.

“Oh, don’t worry you’re always an asshole,” Bea teased back lightly. She liked these moments of easy friendship, where there was nothing particularly stressful happening and they could simply tease each other. “If a performer comes and can do four fans, they deserve the spot,” She told him with a slight laugh. It would be doubly impressive if they weren’t a spellcaster, but she doubted that someone would be as comfortable with fire if they weren’t. She frowned as he did, understanding her stumble quickly. She had lived with the reality of the witch hunter for longer than other people had and while she was worried, she tried not to dwell on it for too long. “That could work, plus people probably would know the smell with the oil.” As long as it looked like she took something into her mouth, it would work and she wouldn’t have to worry about the mess. She nodded at him, understanding the worry he felt. She felt it when her sisters mentioned doing something risky with their magic. “We’re as careful as we can be. Though, there’s not much we can do. I’m sure my sisters would love to just fight her and get it over with, but it doesn’t seem worth it to me.” She finally came to join him at the chairs, sitting across from him, and poured a glass of wine for herself. “Don’t worry about it for too long, you’ll get wrinkles.”

“You’re right,” Kaden said, returning the smile. “But don’t knock it too much. It’s my one true talent. I’m not big on the fan twirling, you know.” He nodded, hoping her trick with the oil would be enough to throw someone off her tracks. It was hard to know for sure if it would be enough to fool someone like him or her, someone who had never questioned the existence of magic, but it was better than nothing. Just had to hope most people who knew about magic didn’t care and didn’t try to exploit her. Or worse. It’s odd, he hadn’t exactly assessed the dangers of what she did before then. It all seemed like such a logical path to take. Guess everything had its risks. “I’d just rather none of you gets hurt. Whatever that takes,” he said with a shrug. Killing her was his preference but it shouldn’t have surprised him that Bea was far more relaxed about it. Hell, she had decided to be his friend immediately after he tried to kill her. He should have known by now how often she let things lie as long as the people she cared about weren’t directly in harm’s way. He didn’t realize how deeply his forehead had creased until she spoke again. He rolled his eyes and shook it off. “Sorry I want to make sure my friend doesn’t die. I mean, come on, I’m the only one that’s allowed to try and off you. I called dibs.” In the absence of talking, his mind drifted to Regan and their last conversation about her. Part of him felt like he should apologize. For real. Most of him wanted to let it lie. With a sigh, he looked down at his drink and tried to think about what his friend might appreciate more. “I’m sorry. For the other day. We don’t have to drag it up again but, uh, I mean it.” He looked back up at her, hoping she got that this wasn’t that easy for him to admit. “Even though this really is your fault, after all. For being friends with an idiot.”

“I bet you’d have an easy time learning with all your hunter instincts and all.” Bea was curious to see how well a hunter would do with things like this. It wouldn’t be as smooth as a performer’s attempt, but she had to assume that a hunter would take to it easier than a normal person. She understood her sisters’ wish for blood, but she had no desire to bring more attention to them if the witch hunter wasn’t looking at them already. “Whatever that takes is a dangerous phrase,” She said lightly, though she understood the sentiment. She’d do whatever it took to keep her sisters safe, even if it meant taking a path she didn’t think was necessarily the best. “I’m sure the witch hunter will respect your dibs on taking me out. You should make sure everyone knows you have dibs on my sisters too, so they won’t mess with them either.” She took a sip of her wine, thinking over how normal this was to her. She knew that to humans without power this was a wild conversation to have, but compared to fighting leprechauns and putting silver in her coffee this was one of the most normal nights she had with Kaden. She watched him then, as he apologized, and in a strange way she saw herself reflected back. Apologizing was hard, especially when it was something as emotionally charged as this. “Thank you,” She told him simply. There was nothing more to say that wouldn’t drag up the conversation again. “I happen to like being friends with idiots. It really boosts my self confidence,” She teased.

Kaden made a face like he tasted something bad at the thought of him twirling fans in any capacity. “I doubt that. Shooting things and stabbing things are pretty different from cartwheels and fan dances.” He downed a decent bit of wine at the thought. “You’d have to get me very drunk to try that shit. Or I’d have to lose a game of truth or dare. Something stupid.” Some part of him suspected he just gave Bea some ammunition against him to get him to try. Still never going to fucking happen. Over his dead body. “Maybe,” he said with a shrug. Dangerous, sure. Accurate? Yeah. There were a handful of people he was pretty sure he’d go to the ends of the earth to help out. Not sure when that happened but it didn’t matter how much he questioned it or tried to deny it; it was still true. And Bea was on that list. Simple enough. He could handle it all as long as it felt like facts and not feelings. “I’ll make sure I spread the word. The Vural’s are my mark and no one else gets them. That will definitely not raise any questions with hunters of any background when they see you’re all still walking around.” It was always strange how they could find themselves talking about the darkest subject with no gravity around it. It was the things that should be simple that got him landed with her hard truths. “Glad I can help, then” he said with a wry smile. “I still owe you that French cooking lesson, right?”

“Well, you wouldn’t look as good as I do, but you know how to use your body and that’s more than plenty of people can say,” Bea replied, ending with a sip of wine. Body control was so important to what she did and she knew that all the hunters had pretty good control of the body. Though, she would love to see Kaden and the other hunters trying to keep up with her cartwheels. “I know your maybes mean yes, Kaden. It is dangerous and I feel like we all put ourselves in too much danger to add this onto the list.” She had no idea why she continually collected people who enjoyed doing things that would eventually kill them, but she was sure between Kaden and her sisters she was going to have gray hair very early. “We’re like your freebie. No one else can do anything because we’re with you.” Bea was rather confident that the other hunters in town liked her enough not to mess with her unless she really did something bad. Being a spellcaster was a great thing in the supernatural world, unbothered by hunters and considered rather helpful at times. They were the epitome supernatural privilege. “Yes! You do. I’ve had to learn all my french cooking on my own without any help!” She told him with a dramatic flare to her voice.

“I’m surprisingly uncoordinated, actually.” Kaden pulled his mouth in a thin line for a moment. Hand to hand combat wasn’t his strength for that reason and it was something he had to constantly work on in training when he was younger, even now. Remembering his past stung a little. It seemed to more and more lately, the more he started questioning things. Kaden realized he got a little lost in thought, probably had a stupidly serious look on his face or some shit. He raised his brows and loosened his expression, trying to clean the slate outside and in. This was a nice normal night with a friend. Not deep introspective bullshit night. “It doesn't always mean yes. But I mean, half my life is running into danger head first,” he said with a shrug. “Not sure I’d know what to do if my life was boring and easy.” It was something he’d said to himself for years and years now, but more often than not he felt a pang of… something when he said it. Longing? Sadness? Who the fuck knew. There was no retiring from hunting in his mind. No erasing everything he knew about the world from his memory. Why waste time wishing for the impossible? “Hmm, you’re right. But I’ve got Regan on my list of freebies, too. And a few others. List’s getting too long, I don’t know. I think my reputation at the Bullet is going to go down the drain.” He said it with a smirk in a joking manner, sure, but there was entirely too much truth to that for him to be comfortable. Maybe best to switch the subject. “Truly shameful. French cooking without a single French person around. You ought to know better.”

Bea scoffed at him, her face pulling into an expression that screamed that’s bullshit. “Whenever you don’t want to say yes because you don’t think someone will react well, you say maybe. Every time.” Reading Kaden was something she was getting better at throughout their friendship and she was sure that he was getting better at reading her. “Even without being a hunter, you would find a way to make your life dangerous, I can just tell,” She teased lightly. Though, she knew that his life would be very different if he hadn’t been raised a hunter, just like her life would be completely changed if she hadn’t been raised a witch. Their identities were so controlled by how they were raised that it was hard to imagine how different things would be without the way they were raised. “Wow, the Vurals aren’t your only? How will we survive?” She asked, turning her face toward the sky in a mock cry. She looked back at him with a wicked grin,“Though you could probably just tell them that we will literally melt their faces off, maybe that would make them back off.” She doubted a witch hunter would end the hunt at that threat, if anything it would spur them on, but she enjoyed the idea. She narrowed her eyes at him,“Someone has been busy and I had to do it on my own, but since you’re here now… You could always show me some tips now.”

“May--” Kaden started and quickly tried to correct himself “I mean, I do not! Fuck.” It was almost annoying that she could read him like an open book sometimes. Almost. He always thought he was less transparent than that but having friends who gave a shit beyond “how was your last kill” proved him wrong. He huffed out a laugh at her jab. “That’s only because I’m the idiot who comes running whenever someone calls on me for help. Come on, it’s not like I go thrill seeking. Imagine the nice quiet life I’d have if no one ever got into trouble.” Right. He was pretty sure he didn’t make friends with anyone who didn’t get into trouble on a regular basis. So that was never going to happen. “Yeah, that might do it. It’s kept me from contemplating a few marks before, that’s for sure.” He felt an instant pit in his gut thinking of Ricky as a mark. It sounded wrong now, even in jest. Calling him a friend felt wrong, too, sure. But all the same. “Don’t blame me. It is not just me who’s been busy, owner of her own theater and top billed performer,” he joked. “But yeah, we can do it now. I’m sure you have enough to make a good velouté or béchamel sauce. If you want.”