#battytxt

Well shit, turns out there's actual studies and stuff about the trauma I experienced as a baby and now it doesn't seem so impossible that that is what caused my plurality.. I'm still not sure if all of it counts as trauma, but there's a few studies on one part of it and not much on the other part, let alone the two together.. but that's better than nothing, yeah??

im telling our doctor physio man that im done. if im stressed out enough to be here then something has to change. fuck.

i cant tell if im just having some natural progression of the self or if im someone else entirely ._. like idk im not NOT me but like. once again. im in my grunge era. and it feels distinctly separate from the frilly puppy dog moments but also not. idk. weird stuff. just wanted to put this somewhere.

i think its time to make a fresh pinned post, since we did get diagnosed with Unspecified Dissociative Disorder recently and also our structure/hierarchy (???) has changed. we've kinda given up on figuring out whos fronting most of the time, unless its really distinct or something. its been interesting going through the diagnostic process after figuring it out a couple years ago because we've really gotten so much better already. our Major Depressive Disorder has even downgraded to Persistent Depressive Disorder :3

Things have been so wonky lately. I'm not entirely sure why. Also there's some fresh notebooks to add to the pile of things we have to bring to our next therapy appointment 🙃