#barrun

1. If someone offers you a long island ice tea. Offer them the back of your hand. (Because that stuff has like 8 different drinks in it. You just got here. And the bartender will feel some guilt sliding it towards you, wait till later maybe)

2. If someone offers you a chaser. Say "No, I work alone" and gain the respect of everyone within 3 ft of you.

3. A passerby will overhear you talking about working alone. They are a bounty hunter. Whatever they offer you. Take it.

4. Beer is not an option. It is your 21st. Act like it. But again, no long islands.

5. Now. At some point during the night. After a couple drinks are under your belt. You might start to get the urge to dance or do something drastic. ..... Please go ahead. Go right ahead, because chances are the cameras are rolling and they are going to catch some comedy gold. (or bronze)

6. At this point in time you have two options. Do I attempt to stop and remember this night. Do I keep going and see what happens. Do I embark down the rabbit hole? This you must decide on your own. It will be a benchmark for your life. Choose wisely.

7. Take a shot. It can be of anything you like. As long as it is Jameson or Sinfire.

8. If you are a guy, you might be looking at a girl. If you are a girl you might be looking at a certain guy. Or visa versa. Or switch it up a little. Or add everything together. Whoever you are looking at. Go up and talk to them. If the first words out of your mouth are "haimersmapher golf...." hopefully one of your friends will come to your aid. If there are no friends around and talking is no longer your thing. Just hug them. And walk away. OR look directly into their eyes. They try to look away. NO. Stop them. Take their shoulders. Look deeper into their eyes. Yes. Thats right. They are no longer looking away. Maintain eye contact for as long as humanly possible. Then without breaking eye contact. Dip your finger in some water from a cup your friends brought to you. And slide your finger over their forehead saying "simba"