#bap stuff

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i dont want to upset anyone with my thoughts but i want to know if anybody else agrees with me ??

but i dont want people to think byg is a lil shit bc im sure he isnt bUT I WANT TO TALK TO SOME 1 ABT THIS

ok lemme start off by saying banglo was the first pairing i shipped in kpop. I got into bap in the very beginning of this year, an d while i watched bap's ta-dah and the killing camp i realized how close to byg zelo was?

i thought it would be only in the show but watching fansigns, fancams and seeing pictures of them i realized zelo looked p attached to bang leader and i thought it was the cutest shit ever, i read alll ff i could find ot them both and it was v cute and wonderful

until they had their comeback w one shot and i noticed some tiny differences in their behavior. Now, I dont think most fans, hell, i dont think anyone noticed this so it must be me really, but bang leader just seemed to have pushed zelo away as much as he could?

he was never aroun dzelo, he wouldnt look at him and i remember seeing some fancams of baby zelo smiling and talking to him and byg had this stiff serious expression on his face???? I was shocked tbh

after that i saw a byg who would rather be with either daehyun or himchan or walk around by himself.

I saw a daehyung and youngjae being bros and walking together and sitting together as alweays, i saw a himchan around byg and around jonguppie a LOT more than before, but

I saw a lonely zelo? he was always around either jongup or leader bang but now he looked hella lonely and lost and it made me think wtf is going on??

after that things got p worse AND im not complaining abt my 'failed' otp, im upset at the way bang dealt with things.

Now, ofc i dont know what happened idk if bang got upset at zelo for some reason or if he just wanted time to himself( but i noticed how his behavior didnt change much with the other members?) or if fans made him aware of 'ships' and 'banglo' and it freaked the fuck out of him.

Im betting on the last one bc he would never be seen around zelo during one shot promos? at the time i thought it was bc they were working and concentrating hard and i was p excited abt their performances and work overseas and all, i was happy for them.

But now i have been seeing pics of bang approaching zelo, i have seen him hugging the boy i have seen it and it just shocked me.

I think zelo really sees byg as his hyung, his older brother and i counted on bang to take care of that damn kid? NOT IN A ROMANTIC WAY, just in a brotherly affectionate way and it wasnt happening. zelo was lonely and looked extra tired thanks to their activities.

What hurt me wasnt the lack of 'banglo' moments, it was the way bang just got to brush off zelo like it was nothing. I thought to myself that maybe they were talking and they would be well off camera but i saw a lonely kid in fancams and it was killing me!!! why would bang do that?

I kept thinkin g on oh he must be really tired too and working hard to turn one shot into a big success. i was hoping for their break and everyone come back relaxed and ready for more, idk, by the end of the year.

BUT

Do u realize they had promoted one shot from feb to may?? do u realize they didnt have a break? and at the same time they have been planning 3 title tracks(coffee shop, hurricane, badman) AND their japanese debut? 

Do u realize besides they working hard on stage and on press conferences and whatever else, they had been learning japanese and their tracks in jp, they have been learning new choreos and recording new songs and mvs?

do u know how tired these poor kids must be by now then? 

At the time, bfore i even knew abt the jp debut or their august comeback ofc

And u know what this makes me notice? a bunch of tired kids who ok must be fine with all of it at some point bt also

a very selfish leader who just really wanted to produce his own album, come back with new mixed up ideas and reach the top asap.

At first i thought he had just left zelo bc of a dumb ship and he didnt feel comfortable with that, but by now i think byg just really pushed everyone away and locked himself in this special bubble where he makes the rest of bap work hard.

While everyone else says oh man look at byg he gives back he gives to charity he wants to adopt kids he

??? ok yes its greast he gives to charity!!!! it really is!! but he is still being selfish, can you imagine how tired bap must be? and even if byg is a workaholic they all deserve a damn break?

Charity doesnt make 1 a real good leader you guys. being able to compose and write his own songs does not make him good leader. 

Hell byg is the one to look the most exhausted and uncomfortable in interviews, what the hell guys. 

OFC I DON T KNOW how the other baps feel abt it? i dk if they like working as much as byg does but i dont bite it. No one can enjoy working tHAT MUCH without stop?

am i really the only one seeing any of this? seeing the change on their behaviors since the beginning of the year? am i the only one seeing how not only bang but everyone else look extra exhausted? how do they get any sleep? do they even have time to eat? im really concerned that they might be into prescription drugs just to keep up without passing out during their promotions.

i seriously think bap isnt in a healthy state and i want them to rest i want them to get out of tv i cant stand watching them,, i cant stand seeing any of their interviews 

it bthers me it hurts me i just want to say all of this because i think im going crazy? how could i enjoy watch thing or talk abt them when i think they must be dying to rest for a little bit? 

i seriously thought byg was ahell of a leader but man he isnt. if he was he would take care of his members man, of course i have no idea what bap has been though, what they go through,

i dont know if they are enjoying themselves,im just assuming everything!!! i know i am

i know i am assuming byg is not a good leadr just as much as everyone else assumes hes a good one tho

i know im assuming he just left zelo alone and zelo was all lost like a lil pup i know!!!!!!