#azurrysquill

I'm changing the way I look at social media overall, so It won't affect me like it has in the past, I feel it can't affect me if I don't let it. It's just I'm really passionate about my artwork, and I worked hard on this name and it sucks that someone was trying to tear it down.

I heard with this issues is why most people won't join Bluesky. So many people have left for this reason as well. It gets exhausting after awhile.

I think once I open my account back up, I'll only use it to post art and that's it. I will not talk much anymore in the future, at least not on there, no way. It is just not good for talking and now I can see why some of my friends don't bother.

I mean, it's called bootleg Twitter by some people for a reason, and now I can understand. The same toxic Twitter mentally is on there. It's just no good, and I do feel a lot better about this mess overall.

Also, nah it's not delusional to think positive, especially in a situation like this. I think some people have sadly lost their minds and all they see is the bad stuff. I've learned that if I don't see any good in life, how can I keep moving forward?

Balance is very much needed, and I understand that, but unfortunately some people will sadly never understand that, and I don't expect them to. Not with that attitude anyway. From now on, I'm done with trying to speak to people that are toxic and don't try to improve themselves.

So, I'm working on some Berserk stuff like sketches and things. As I'm opening my Patreon tonight which I'll link on multiple platforms. Gonna be doing art part time so I'll posting more and also will be working on a second style that's more simple compared to my set one. It's just something for fun and I think it'll help me loosen up my work a bit.

But yeah, I'll also be working on Juneleb since I'm a Caleb main. This is my first Juneleb. I've only been playing this game for almost two months, I think it's been? I'm Hunter Level 72, so still a ways to go.

There's also a good friend of mine's birthday month, well their birthday was yesterday so I'm all over the place at the moment. I also need to start recording my art again. I forget I even have Twitch lol, and my YouTube is collecting dust. With all that said, just wanted to write since it's been awhile I wrote anything here properly. I wanted to let people know what I'm up to that's interested.

I'll be working on a new profile and such for here as I love Miura's art, but it doesn't fit my page as much as it used to, but I'll always love his work. It means a lot to me, and I'm glad I was strong enough to read Berserk.

Some spoilers, but the zine was made to show what it would be like if Casca regained her sexuality. I'm very sex positive, and I'm also antifa, meaning anti-censorship. I feel that as long as it isn't hurting anyone, it has a right to exist. Life isn't all sugar and rainbows, so art shouldn't be all the time either.

I will say that drawing darker stuff has helped me deal with all that I've been through this year. From dealing with harassment and stalking to the loss of my grandmother... I felt so distant from my friends and family, but it's slowly been getting better, I mean it was on and off, but doesn't seem to be as frequent feeling.

That being said, It was never done in poor taste or anything like that. Berserk is heavy. A lot of dark themes.

So, I understand that it's not for everyone, with that said, it does suck though when it's from someone who is also a Berserk fan that misses the point of what this story and characters mean. It's a story about redemption. I know Guts wants revenge on Griffith for what he has done, and the whole thing is a tragedy.

There is parallels between the two. I mean, I can relate to also being in toxic relationships myself, so I know good writing when I see it. Both characters feel well fleshed out. I'm aware that media literacy is a lost art form, but I think that it's healthy to talk about these things, and censoring it won't help us at all.

Everyone deserves a safe haven to have an outlet to enjoy things. That's being human. I'm just feeling like with everything going on, they have lost the point of that. Bluesky has gotten really heavy with the rules getting changed supposedly a month from now.

Sorry that I haven't been very active here. Slowly wanting to change that but I got a lot I need to sort out with taking care of family and my home. I hope y'all have a good evening! 🖤

I really hope they reconsider, and it would be nice if they had more tags like Deviantart, Y!gallery, and FA has a decent tagging system so people can block things like blood, gore, and other disturbing things. I love some horror so it doesn't bother me.

I hanged out with some folks on Discord, and it was fun. I missed that. I feel like I've been so caught up with work I haven't had the time to really relax and chat with anyone so it was nice.

I feel like I've been working so hard, but it seems like it's paying off. I'll try to get some new artwork up sometime this week. I'm pretty excited about that as well as catching up on Berserk, and maybe play a little Genshin Impact and Star Rail.

I love those games. I also been playing a little Dark Cloud on the side, but unless it's game testing, I don't play as much games as I used to. Adulting is something else, and I realize I only have so much time in a day.

Oh, and I got my art scouted in the Newgrounds art portal, so I'm taking criticism so I can make my art even better. This is one step closer to my dream, and I'm pretty happy about it!💗

I don't think I can report it here sadly with Deviantart's strict rules. I don't see how I broke any of Deviantart's rules. If I did then, I'm really sorry about that. I haven't checked Deviantart's rules in a bit. So I'll review them.

That's on me if I did break some rules, and I'll take full responsibility for that. I know on Furaffinity I read that you can't mention the person's name, even though what the person was doing was a crime. So I did delete the copy of that journal on FA because of their rules. it's for sure a messy area to report.

I sent a support ticket because I wrote that PSA for a reason. I know I was upset and I'll admit was rude to this person that was being rude to me. Also, has been cyberstalking me for a very long time. They for sure hold a nasty grudge to be honest. It's not normal what they did and it's really concerning so that's why I made that document. I didn't want anyone else to get hurt.

On Bluesky this person just came out of nowhere back in November last year, and now I'm dealing with some people accusing my art of being AI which I'll explain in a different journal. I realize I need to start reporting this stuff on YouTube and TikTok. Those places don't seem to have an issue with this, but again I'll keep my cool this time around.

So it's some rough times for me for sure, but I won't give up. I know in the past people have had issues reporting cyberstalkers for their crimes because of how messy social media can be. I have to keep my cool regardless what it is when reporting this stuff, it's for sure a sensitive situation.

Hmm... So what should I do y'all? If you have any advice, then please, let me know what I can do. That being said, this was the last month I was gonna talk about it for now, and that journal was honestly stressful to write, so I have mixed feelings about it being deleted here.