#avversiera writes

Tobirama knows his wife is up to something, when you keep coming by the Hokage office for the previous couple hours, bringing him lunch and other random objects from his home office that he did not need, with the most eye-catching and jaw-dropping outfit that you definitely should not be wearing outside of the house. Tobirama seethes under his breath, and while he definitely does not mind the very deep plunge of the front of your kimono that reveals your supple breasts, or the high slit of your skirt that reveals your legs that he has put over his shoulder countless of times, he definitely does not want to see you flaunt yourself around with outfits only meant for his eyes, nor let a layperson set eyes on you. So Tobirama keeps his lips pressed in a tight line, and he keeps mum, trying to diligently focus on his work, speeding and skimming through paragraphs that he has no idea how he had dealt with before. At this point of his day, he is ready to come home and push you into your shared bed with him, and make you sing in pleasure and supplication. 

He tugs down at his hakama, trying to settle the growing frustration that it hides, especially now that there are a couple jounins in the room, reporting to him about their missions. His shoulders tense, expecting you to slide into the room, with another outfit he would rather see in the confines of your marital bed, but he relaxes once the jounins filter out through the door, one by one. Perhaps, you decided not to be a tease today. 

However, you never do what Tobirama wishes, and today is definitely not going to be that day. 

“M-my lady!” The last jounin exclaims as he opens the door to exit. 

Tobirama draws a quiet breath, preparing himself. He glances at the flustered jounin who is averting his gaze, and glares at him to make haste, at which the jounin gulps and runs out of the office, lest he receives the wrath of the Nidaime. 

Tobirama pushes all the paperwork he supposes are done with, and he slowly lifts his eyes from his desk and towards you. 

You are smirking at him, and your hands fold underneath your breasts. You transfer your weight to your left hip, accentuating your figure further. Your kimono is loose, with the collar exposing the expanse of your neck, and Tobirama stares at it for a moment, before turning his gaze to meet your eyes. 

“If it’s another book or random object from the house you have brought, save it,” Tobirama slowly warns. 

You laugh lightly, and walk towards his desk. You sit on the edge of his desk right beside him, and you lean backwards, with your hands flattened against the desk. Then, you lift a leg back, exposing your thigh. 

“I was just about to bring a couple problems with you, my lord, some that you may be able to fix if you act on it now,” you bite your lip coyly. 

Tobirama leans back coolly on his chair, and places his arms on the armrests. “And pray tell, what could these problems be, wife?”

“You rarely have fun with me anymore, Tobirama,” you lean forward this time, and Tobirama gets a glimpse of even more of your cleavage. “You’ve been so busy being the Hokage all this time, I am feeling a little neglected.”

You bite your lip, but the glint in your eyes does not show any remote shame. “And besides, don't you think you deserve a little break?”

Tobirama sighs, and he calms the blood that is pumping towards his groin. He has a feeling he is going to regret asking this of you, but he gives in as he can never really say no to you. You have a way of setting his inhibitions loose. Besides, you do not really ask much of him. “And whatever can I do to make it up?” 

Your lips curve upward mischievously. “I was thinking that maybe you can divide and conquer, love. Delegate, if you will.”

Tobirama raises an eyebrow at this. 

“Perhaps, we can revisit utilizing that shadow clone technique of yours,” you prompt. 

Tobirama immediately feels a blush creeping up his neck. His mind flashes back to the last time that he and his shadow clones had his way with you, and the way you enjoyed yourself thoroughly. His skin suddenly feels warm at the thought of the shadow clones’ orgasms adding an intense heat to his own. 

“And maybe you can just send one of you anyway to do the job, and keep me company as my husband,” you suggest, and this time, it earns a glare from Tobirama. 

Tobirama’s neck snaps up so quickly to meet your eyes, unable to stop the betrayal and the disbelief from spreading across his face. “That is absurd, I am your husband.” 

Your leg starts to slide up and down against the side of his own, and it sends a pleasant shiver through his spine. He puts a hand on your knee and he presses your leg away, and then, he abruptly stands, sliding his arm around your waist. 

The light in your eyes glows playfully, and Tobirama leans forward. “I am at work,” he murmurs. 

A hand travels down this torso, then suddenly, two hands grip the belt of his hakama and you pull him towards you. 

“At work, you say?” You peer up at him, your breath on his skin like a spark to an astute match.

Tobirama feels a powerful aura near the Hokage office, and he knows without a doubt that his elder brother is about to enter. He panics for a split second, especially more aware of the hardening of his cock, it threatens to pitch a tent against his hakama. 

His arm slips away from your waist, and then he quickly disperses another shadow clone in place of his to deal with his brother, and without another word and a knowing smirk growing across your lips, he bends down to carry you over his arms, and he uses his Flying Raijin Jutsu to teleport the two of you into your bedroom. 

//

You feel yourself being flattened against the bed, and Tobirama’s hot mouth against your neck, licking and sucking the side of your throat, pressing kisses on your jaw, the space between your collarbones, and then his hands framing your breasts together as he plants even more kisses across your chest. His teeth graze the slope of your breasts, and his hands pull apart your kimono hastily, eager to drink the sight of you. 

When he gazes upwards at you, you note the way his red eyes darken to dying embers, sending an excitable spark at the base of your skull, and it makes the very pit of your abdomen warm from arousal.

“You like what you see?” You ask coyly, and your hands reach down to stroke his hips. Then you part your legs, completely pulling what else remains to keep your kimono together. 

Tobirama licks a stripe from your abdomen and up to your sternum. “I love what I see, and I see what I love,” he intones, his voice slightly deeper now. He undoes the tie of his belt, and he shrugs off his yukata. 

Your eyes move to roam hungrily across the expanse of his bare chest, the defined muscles of his shoulders, arms, and his very toned abdomen, marked by hard lines that converge downwards towards his hardening cock. 

His reply moves your hips to arch towards him, creating a pocket of air underneath the base of your spine and the bed. His body covers your own and presses against your skin flush, and you grind against him as his lips devour yours, his tongue nudging yours, then the roof of your tongue. You suck at his lips, your hands tangle inside his hair, and your thighs rub against the sides of his torso, and then you are kicking his loose pants away from his waist. He kisses you breathless, his hands wander down, and gathers your knees towards your chest. 

You have a feeling that Tobirama is excited now. His eyes are wide, and his pupils are blown, and it feels like you have set a beast free from the cages of his self-imposed sternness. Tobirama takes a ragged breath in, and he dives into another kiss, his mouth hungry and desperate, loving and wild at the same time. You continue to grind against him, aiming to slowly press your aching clitoris against his concealed cock, and the action makes you close your eyes and see dots of light in your dark vision. Your breaths begin to quicken, as Tobirama moves against you, hips rocking, hands cupping your ass, kneading them as if the last vestige of his self-control rests there. You moan into his mouth as two fingers slip down to press against your growing wetness, and you hook a leg over his waist, wanting him to delve into your folds even more, for his fingers to drag against the inside of your walls, but Tobirama pulls away, having other ideas. 

“Did you really think wearing these clothes around the village and the office for others to notice would go unaddressed by me?” Tobirama murmurs, the same two fingers parting your lips apart and tickling the roof of your mouth. “Whatever did you hope to gain from this?”

“That you fuck the living daylights out of me?” You reply crudely after unsheathing his fingers from your mouth, with your tongue dragging against the line separating them. 

You see Tobirama resist rolling his eyes at you. 

“You really do act as if I deprive you of your needs,” Tobirama says, and then you see a dangerous smirk teasing his lips. “Perhaps, we ought to change that today.” 

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” you muse, your gaze flitting from his eyes, to his tall, strong nose, and then his parted lips. “Maybe instead of talking, you can make that mouth useful and show me what you mean.” 

Tobirama unapologetically takes his hand and places it at your nape, gathers your hair, and tugs lightly at the roots. “Oh, I aim to.”

He tugs again, and you grind against him, watching as his eyes darken deeper with lust. Your heartbeat hastens in anticipation. 

Tobirama stares at you as he rears back, and kicks off the last piece of his clothing. His cock comes alive, and your eyes are immediately drawn towards the way it stands up proudly, the flesh pink and fully engorged. A hard vein lines the underside of his cock, and you bite your lip to suppress a moan, and possibly, from sitting up and taking him on completely by your mouth and ravishing him until he is gasping for breath and moaning with his head thrown up to the sky. That image further makes your clit throb, and instead, you lick your lips slowly, and reach up to scratch your nails against the side of his rib, and then towards the dip of his hip. 

Tobirama unleashes another shadow clone, another him that has an undeniable erection hitting the base of his abdomen. He pulls you towards the edge of the bed, just as his clone moves to settle above your head. The clone above your head sits you up so that you are pressing your back against his chest. You adjust your legs quickly so that you are in a kneeling position, almost as if Tobirama has planned to have you on your knees in supplication, in regret, for the way you dressed so beguilingly around him. You let a hand wander behind you, and you tug at the clone’s hard cock, your thumb pressing against the wet slit of his head, and then you adjust yourself upwards so that you are pressing your ass against his dick. 

Tobirama stands in front of you, observing you. “Is this what you want?”

“Yes,” you whisper and let out a sigh, as the clone’s cock wanders in between your legs, brushing against the slickness of your entrance. One of your hands flies to the clone’s waist as he continues to rub against the folds of your pussy. You lean your head back, each movement heightening with every pass of the cock in between your legs. 

You peer underneath your half-closed lids, watching Tobirama and the way he neglects his throbbing cock, waiting patiently—disciplined like the warrior that he is. Finally, The clone’s cock presses hotly against your entrance, the head pushing through and  making you quiver from the way it easily slides inside, the drag making your walls constrict. The flesh inside you feels heavy as it spreads you out, and the sensitiveness makes you wonder where you begin and where the clone ends. The clone drags its cock in and out, inciting a low and drunk-like moan through your lips. 

You hear Tobirama exhale harshly in front of you, and you see his cock twitch with want. 

“Lay down, both of you,” Tobirama commands, and your walls clench against his clone’s dick at the sound of his voice. Your insides feel full, but you keep wanting, craving more of Tobirama at each passing second. 

The clone underneath you lets out a low moan as he lowers the two of you on his back. Your legs spread open, and you start to move against the clone from above, slowly grinding your hips as your ass meets the base of his cock. Then, Tobirama grabs your hips to still you, as if to tell you to behave, then he lowers down to place his lips against your clit, and you press your lips together as his tongue pads against the aching mound that is begging for his attention. You throw your head back, as the clone’s cock pierces into you, his hips snapping up every time Tobirama grinds his own tongue against your clit. Tobirama sucks your clit in intervals with each grind of his tongue, and the sensation makes you shiver and gasp. You feel yourself becoming slicker and slicker inside, and you can only brace yourself as Tobirama adds more pressure to your clit. Your hips disobey Tobirama’s hands and you begin to grind down against the clone, chasing and wanting to reach the edge of your pleasure, but Tobirama continues to lap against your pussy, his powerful tongue sending tendrils of electricity through your spine and to the rest of your body. 

Your moans come unvarnished, raw, and so labored with lust, you feel the clone’s orgasm explode inside of you, and as he pops out of your entrance, you glance Tobirama tasting his own clone’s cum from your entrance, and eventually, surprising you as Tobirama takes his clone into his own mouth. 

The sight makes you feel feverish, and you feel yourself clench inside with even more want. Tobirama’s eyes meet you as his tongue flicks up against the clone’s dick, and he disperses the clone.

Your husband lets out a sharp gasp, and his body turns pink as he feels his clone’s climax slowly building on to his own. 

“Be careful what you wish for, wife,” Tobirama utters and he brings his hands together to make another shadow clone. 

Suddenly, Tobirama grasps your hips, and turns you to your stomach, and then pulls you towards him. You get the sense of the clone moving behind you, and you hear him moan as he pushes into your entrance once more. 

“Fuck,” the clone gasps. “Fuck, you’re so tight.” 

You lower yourself into your elbows, and the clone begins to slam harder and deeper inside you. This rips a scream that comes from the back of your throat, the sound of it high-pitched and ragged. 

Suddenly, the shadow clone stills, and you glance back as Tobirama himself teases his own cock against his clone’s ass. The sight almost enrages you, and you feel a possessiveness you have not felt in the previous time that Tobirama used his clones to bring you to the brink of your delicious unconsciousness. He has never done this before, but now he has proven you wrong—Tobirama is aiming to ensure that you have your fill, and that he shows you that he can be fun as well. 

Two can play at that game. 

You narrow your eyes as the clone shakes, inside and over your body, as Tobirama sheathes himself in, well, himself. The clone moans loudly, his voice thready, and it transforms into a whine that you find sweet and delicious, and it makes you want to ruin the clone and Tobirama, to make them come so hard that Tobirama relinquishes every last bit of his inhibition. 

You shift your weight to your hands, and you slam down into the clone, sheathing yourself against him fully to the hilt. The clone gasps, his eyes closing from the sensation of his cock inside you, and from the burning and intoxicating way that his original is ripping through him, tearing him open in such an agonizing way that it feels both suffocating and like he is falling into an abyss with each time you slam against him and clench your walls against his appendage. 

The clone is crying out in a melodious moan, and you hear Tobirama rut against himself, his low growls making you feel more alive.  

You begin to find a rhythm, each push and pull stinging and burning underneath your lids, making you see stars. Your hair is pulled back, and you cry out, wanton and in so much heady need, rapturous and intense, and you feel yourself being stretched out like a taut strand ready to break with so much of a tug. An impossible heat strikes you below your belly like lightning, and you come with an unvarnished keening moan, and you collapse onto your arms. Sweat runs from your forehead and down your chest. 

The clone’s moans begin to hit a higher note, and he plunges himself back into Tobirama, meeting his thrusts violently, and keeping his own cock buried in your pussy, grinding and riding the tails of your last orgasm. You close your eyes, feeling your own blood roaring in your ears, and pumping at your temples from the sweet adrenaline that Tobirama is granting you. Your body trembles without your say, and your legs shake from the angle that you are on.

Suddenly, Tobirama’s clone climaxes, and lets out desperate moans as he bursts his seed into you. You try to catch your breath, but Tobirama wastes no time, as he flips you on your back, and is now aligning his length against your entrance, and pushing your legs towards your head. 

Tobirama looks ruined, his breath coming out hard and heavy, his chest heaving with breathlessness, and his neck red from the clone’s previous orgasm. He groans as he sheathes himself into you, claiming you once and for all, like he has aimed to do so in the very beginning. Your breaths turn into moans, and your hands claw at Tobirama’s shoulders. He sets your legs free, and you hook them over his lower back, and Tobirama sets an erratic pace with his hips, that each time he pulls out and impales you repeatedly, you feel yourself being split open by his cock, like you are cut anew each time he delves into you. 

“Tell me what you really want,” Tobirama growls near your ear. 

Your walls clench against him tighter, and Tobirama’s body adapts even more to yours, his torso curling over you as his hips begin to rock against yours rapaciously. 

“Fuck,” you cry out, and you shut your eyes from the intrusion and the next cliff you are about to dive from without control. “I want you! Ah-! I want you!”

Tobirama changes his pace into an agonizing and tedious one, and you groan from frustration. There is light threatening to disperse from the back of your eyeballs, but it is snuffed out by Tobirama’s slow grind inside you. With his cock making you whole and his low, velvet baritone voice caressing your ear, you let yourself open wider to receive him. 

“And have I not given you every need to satiate you?” 

Your hands find purchase on his shoulders again, and you buck up wildly, trying and failing to set the pace that will surely send you unconscious from the pleasure. 

“And what could my shadow clones possibly achieve when I could do so much more?” Tobirama suddenly lifts your hips up with both hands and slams you against him. 

You gasp as he finds a spot that lights up your nerves all around. You see the haughty smirk on Tobirama’s face, and when you clench around him again, it is wiped off and is replaced by a wild look in his eyes, like a raging fire that he is keeping at bay. 

You want to feel more of him, for him to keep on burying himself so that you can mold your insides to his likeness. You grind against him at your own pace—unashamed and with abandon—while Tobirama is rutting into you deeply. His mouth finds your breasts as he bends over you and begins to ram you like he is stuffing you into the mattress. 

“Tobirama, yes, please, more!” You plead, urging Tobirama to batter himself into your mercilessly. 

He acquiesces, and this time, you cry out with the effect of mescaline surging through your blood vessels—you feel delirious as if your soul floated away from your body and is slammed back just in time as Tobirama comes with a heady moan, it makes you shake underneath his hold. 

Tobirama keeps thrusting for a couple more times, riding his own high, his eyes closed in pleasure and his mouth parted in reverie. You feel a flood burst from you, the mixed cum from you and Tobirama dripping from your pliant hole. 

Your husband covers you with his own body, and your arms come up around his back. His own sweat drips to you, but at this moment, you both do not mind the contact. You can hear his heartbeat thundering from his neck, and his breaths brushing against your nape. 

Tobirama pushes himself up to look at you, and then brushes his hand against your forehead to wipe away the hair and the sweat painting it. 

“You are right that I have been so busy,” Tobirama whispers tenderly. “Let me make it up to you.” 

You smile in bliss as you surrender your weight to Tobirama, and he uses his own arms to lift you up. You lean heavily against your husband as he pulls you off the bed, and then he transfers you into his arms, and carries you to the bathroom. Tobirama carefully sets you down to sit at the edge of the bathtub, and then he moves to draw hot water into the bath, and in no time, it fills and Tobirama is urging you to slide down. 

Your limbs feel heavy and leaden with impossible weight, but you do not mind being pampered by Tobirama. You feel him slide behind you, and then he pulls you up against his chest. 

Your head rests on the space between his neck and shoulder, and you turn your head slightly towards him. 

“How was fucking your own self? Or better yet, feeling that you fucked yourself, too?” 

Tobirama chuckles to your surprise. “It was…different. I wanted to impress you.”

You bite your lip to keep yourself from laughing out loud. “Oh, my love. Would you really do anything for me?”

Tobirama squeezes your waist. “Don’t get ahead of yourself.” 

You feel yourself drifting to sleep, and you are vaguely aware of Tobirama moving you again, of his hands with a towel drying you and dressing you, and then tucking you back into bed where you can be comfortable. 

He kisses your forehead goodbye. “Sleep well.”  

You hum as he kisses your cheek this time, and you succumb to the sweet sleep that is inviting you. 

You cannot find Tobirama anywhere, no matter how hard you look for him. You search the Hokage mansion and its many rooms, wait outside the Senju compound like a fool to get a glimpse, but Tobirama is nowhere to be found in the usual places you know he is supposed to be. You also wait around outside the Hokage office discreetly, but Tobirama is not there either, and instead, you get found out by Hashirama and Madara. 

 Madara stares at you, his expression unreadable. Hashirama is smiling with no teeth, trying his best not to laugh. 

 “For a Hokage who claims to be busy, you sure do have a lot of time to….walk around,” you finish lamely. 

 Madara lets out a small cough and he rolls his eyes at you, sending you a knowing look. “You’re not going to find him out and about in public.” 

Hashirama claps his hands together. “That’s right! He’s probably busy messing around in his laboratory.” 

 Hashirama and Madara walk towards you, and you are forced to walk in between them. The three of you head outside, with no specific destination in mind. 

“Have you two talked yet?” Hashirama inquires. 

 Madara glances down at you, trying not to be too curious. 

 “No…” You reply. “I think he’s avoiding me.”

 “He won’t be able to avoid you if you keep on hanging around outside the Senju compound,” Madara points out. “Like a stalker. Or worse, a beggar.” 

 You shoot Madara an offended glare. 

 “Oh please,” Hashirama shoots his friend a look. “You are welcome to stop by anytime and visit. We’d love to have you again.”

You feel your cheeks heat. “That is not necessary.” 

 Hashirama’s shoulders shake slightly from his laugh. “Oh, you two. You guys are so silly.”

 “Don’t encourage them,” Madara interrupts Hashirama, then he glances at you. “You deserve better.” 

You cringe inwardly. 

 “Oh, by the way, Mito has stopped setting Tobirama up for dates so he’s really free now,” Hashirama includes, as if this is information that you need to know. 

 “Okay, I guess,” you slowly say, not really sure how to respond to this. Each second they keep mentioning Tobirama to you makes you more confused and flustered. It is more than you can comprehend. 

 “If he is bothering you,” Madara painstakingly interrupts Hashirama’s intentions, “just scream and I will be there.”

 Hashirama laughs uneasily. 

 The two men sandwiching you between them suddenly quiet down and freeze. You feel Hashirama push you forward, forcing you to look straight ahead, where you spot the person that is blocking your way. 

You stare at Tobirama, and it is like you are seeing him again for the first time. You feel yourself still, as the rest of the world moves around you. You are vaguely aware of Hashirama pulling Madara away to give you two some space, but your focus is completely stolen by Tobirama. He looks more mature and young at the same time, but he is still just as handsome, if not more. His hair is still the same shocking white pile of a bird’s nest, unruly, and yet, you find yourself wondering if it feels softer than it looks. You notice that he seems to be more muscular than the last you saw him, his fitted dark clothes sticking to his skin that makes each line of muscle sharper than it looks. 

 Or maybe he has always been like this and distance from him has changed your perspective.

 You are not sure how to react. You have been seeking him out to give him a piece of your mind, but at the same time, you just feel this relief settling in your chest, as if your heart has been twisting all this time and this is the moment it chooses to unwind and finally relax and let it beat properly. 

 You feel an urge to get him alone and just talk it out with him. 

Realizing the direction your thoughts are taking, you mentally slap yourself. You never had to miss someone like this before.

“My eldest nephew got married,” Tobirama starts, as if this is vital information for him to share, and you hear someone snickering behind you. 

 It sounds a lot like Hashirama. 

Tobirama glares in your direction, but it is not towards you. 

“Come with me,” Tobirama suddenly commands, and he turns around to walk away, not even checking if you’re following him. 

You pause for a moment, a little bewildered by Tobirama. Then, you notice him slowing down his steps to wait for you and despite your chagrin, you finally allow yourself to bound after him, jogging lightly to catch up.

 Tobirama leads you through the streets, walking very quickly and without saying a word. You try to think of what to say to him, and you also want to thank him for what he did for you, but whenever you would open your mouth, Tobirama hastens his pace, and the words get stuck at the back of your throat. It is like he does not even want to hear you speak. 

 You start to notice that the two of you are climbing up the Hokage mountain and a funny thought of Tobirama pushing you off crosses your mind. Does he still hold some grudge against you? Are the two of you about to butt heads over what he pulled years ago with the Academy? Even if he did basically help you get pardoned, Tobirama is a man who dedicates his heart fully to the village. He would do anything to help the people that he serves. 

 The trek is long and hard. The unpaved road is slippery and unstable, and there are rocks slipping off occasionally as you two make your way up. Your breaths are loud in your ear, and despite having a good stamina, you find yourself tiring already because you have been feeling too jittery all the way up. 

 You try not to complain, but the sun is high up in the sky, and it is making your eyes tear up from the brightness. 

 “Are we there yet?” You ask him, trying to find a stable foothold. 

 Tobirama does not reply and he keeps going. 

“Hey, when are you going to talk to me?” You ramble on, not even considering politeness anymore. Tobirama should be used to it by now. “Mind you, it is your fault that we left on a bad note two years ago. You know I really thought we were growing closer, but you pull some heinous shit–fuck!” 

You almost slip but you catch yourself. 

 Tobirama glances at you, and his silence is beginning to annoy you. 

“Also, what the actual hell is wrong with you?” You continue. 

 “Are your manners going to get any better?” Tobirama inquires, and he stops ahead of you. 

You burst out running to boost yourself towards where he is, and you glare at the side of Tobirama’s face, mostly at the red stripe tattooed on his cheek. 

“Tobirama,” you utter his name, after a beat of silence. “What you did…” 

Tobirama turns his head to you, and for a moment, he looks hesitant to hear what you are about to say. 

 However, the view below you catches your attention, and you forget your words again. It takes your breath away, and you smile widely. 

 “Wow!” You exclaim in amazement. You look at the growing village, its winding streets sprawling through what used to be the forest. More buildings have popped up, and it seems the walls of Konohagakure are expanding. You can see the clan compounds, the training grounds, and some new construction happening in new spots. 

Tobirama turns his gaze towards the village as well, but his eyes slide to the side to glance at you, and then forward again. 

 You feel your face soften at the village, your home. 

“This village,” Tobirama starts, and you turn your head towards him. “It is everything to my brother and I. It holds our hopes for the future, and it is a way to nurture children so that they may thrive and become the new leaders for a peaceful world.”

 You cannot help the smile that is lifting the corners of your mouth. For someone who seems to be your opposite in almost everything, you find that your views align with his. The confirmation of what you have always known him to be is like a favorable result from a long experiment; it is quite cathartic. 

So Tobirama is this kind of man, you muse to yourself. Though why does he have to take me all the way here to give a speech…  

 You start to chuckle, and Tobirama gives you a weird look. 

You shrug, and you turn back to the village below you. 

 “I'd like to help," you tell him, deciding here and now, that you want in on Tobirama’s vision. 

 "Why?" Tobirama asks. "You're free. You do not have to be tied down by anything.'

You glance at him questioningly. "It’s because I want to, Tobirama. Not because I've been given some kind of ultimatum or held hostage." 

 For a moment, Tobirama stares at you and you see gears turning in his head. You want in on what he is thinking. 

"You will always have a choice here," Tobirama replies, and this time, it is your time to stare and you get lost in your thoughts, trying to see the meaning behind his words. 

The clouds ahead start to move, putting a shadow over the village. Slits of sunlight pore through the shadows, and silver light outlines the tips of the clouds, as if the sun is climbing to peek through. 

 As if on cue, a breeze blows by and the shadow of the clouds move on, and on its wake, the sunlight shines on Tobirama’s face and there is this realization dawning in you, blossoming just under the left of your chest and spreading through you until it is seizing every fiber and nerve in you. It is warm and it is gentle, like you can bask in it forever. It makes you question everything all at once, but it also holds all the answers to all of those questions. 

 You are walking into the unknown, but you do not feel alone. 

The feeling makes you step closer to Tobirama and the man studies you, and you find that he seems to be looking at you differently. There is no malice, no judgement. 

Nothing has changed, and yet, everything feels changed. 

 Tobirama’s forehead creases, a sign of his puzzlement. He blinks and you notice the way his white eyelashes looks almost silver under this light. 

You stop at this because you are admiring him, memorizing his little details that you think you have missed before. You feel more than fond, and a part of you longs to reach out to him, to touch him and see how he reacts, and there is a sliver of hope that maybe, just maybe he will not let go.

 It slaps you like cold water on a winter morning, and it makes your head dizzy. 

Oh. 

Oh. 

  You tear your gaze away from him, and your heart thunders against your chest. 

Oh, shit. 

Nausea hits you and it feels more like a gut punch. 

"Are you alright?" Tobirama suddenly asks. 

 You press your lips together, trying to buy yourself time to figure this out. You have never felt like this before and it makes you want to run up and down the Hokage mountain, screaming your lungs out. 

 Maybe that is an exaggeration. 

Tobirama calls your name, and finally, his voice tears you out from your spiraling thoughts. 

"How about a match?" You blurt out, not knowing how else to handle this. At least crossing swords with him is familiar and not at all confusing.

 Tobirama smirks and you look away. 

"I will win today," Tobirama declares. 

 "As if," you scoff, already feeling like your old self. "You've picked up more pens to write with, I bet you're out of practice." 

 Tobirama hums. "Maybe, but I have every intention to do so. I do not lose, unless it is to my advantage." 

You raise an eyebrow, suddenly feeling fired up. 

"Oh, is that so, my lord? " 

Tobirama does not look at all offended. In fact, you notice that he is enjoying this. 

His smile to you looks almost fond. 

 You want to cover his face so that you do not have to see him look at you like that. 

//

You twist the blade in your hand using your wrist, and you hold it in front of you. You regard Tobirama, watching the lines of his body as he positions his sword at the front of his body. 

 "Just because we seem friendly right now does not mean I have let go of my anger towards you," you warn Tobirama. 

This seems to change the expression on his face. He looks apologetic. 

"Hit me with all you've got," Tobirama says, and it sounds like he is saying sorry. 

Without any more preamble, you charge first, swinging your sword with all your might. Tobirama counters, presses, and he lunges and he braces himself to keep himself steady. 

 You feign by lightly tapping his blade with yours, and then you slide forward until the sharp edge of your blade is against the top of his hilt. 

You give him a dangerous smile. Tobirama’s eyes narrow, and he backs off, and he wrings his sword against yours, spinning the blades until he manages to throw your sword up in the air. He catches it and he gives you a triumphant smile for disarming you. 

You suddenly feel contempt and your face darkens. 

"Is this my win?" Tobirama asks, his tone cocky.

 "You wish, you bastard," you snap and you charge towards him, hands up and open, ready to grab at anything. 

His hands are preoccupied and you waste no time launching yourself at him, hitting him with your knee up his torso.

At the last minute, Tobirama ditches both swords and he also puts his hands up. You throw a punch, and you keep going, your stance low and steady as you advance in on him, raining down your fist, your elbows, trying to get him to open up. 

 Tobirama steps back with each hit, dodging and sidestepping but you do not let up with your assault. 

 You aim a kick to his head and try to anchor your leg on his shoulder but he throws you off and flips you to your back. 

Tobirama suddenly looks confused. This fight has gotten a lot more serious serious he intended.

 All you want to do is express how frustrated you are with him. 

You jump to your feet, despite the light pain on your back. You charge at him and this time, you grab at his neck, swing both of your legs up and then around his neck. 

Tobirama immediately grabs your waist and he goes to the ground to throw you. His hands go to your arms to pin them to your chest, but you twist your legs to bring him to the ground and you waste no time to get on top of him. 

You grab at his collar. Tobirama places his hands on your wrist, firm, but he is not fighting back. 

"You're such an asshole," you yell, not liking how you are suddenly snapping at him. Usually, it takes a lot more to make you angry. 

 "I know," Tobirama quietly replies. His answer is so painfully honest, like he is aware and yet, here he is. Admitting it to you.

Frustrated that he is just agreeing with you, you slam your fists to his chest, trying to make him fight you again, but his firm hold on your wrists does not ease up. 

 Your eyes dart to your arms on his chest, and you watch as Tobirama’s big hands travel up to cover your hands with his. You feel the callouses of his palms against your skin. 

"Are you done?" Tobirama stares straight at you. 

You let out a sigh, and you fall slack against him. Tobirama reluctantly lets go of your hands and you land beside him, your skin tingling from where he touched you. 

"Fine, you win," you murmur. 

Tobirama sits up and he glances at you. "Are you free tomorrow?" 

Your gaze snapped to him in surprise. "What?" 

 Tobirama opens his hands in front of him. "Are you not angry with me anymore?" 

"No. Just disappointed." You glance at his hands. "I've forgiven you long ago, and as much as I hate to say it, I understand why." 

 Tobirama nods. 

"About the bounty," you start. 

 Tobirama interrupts you before you can continue. "Don’t thank me. It is my duty to look out for each citizen of Konoha." 

You look away, unable to identify the budding frustration and disappointment you are feeling with his words. 

"Ah well," you murmur, feeling awkward. 

 "If you are free tomorrow, meet me at the Hokage office," Tobirama says, and when you turn to look at him, the tips of his ears are reddening. 

You sigh, and you stand up. You feel Tobirama’s eyes on you as you move and it makes you feel a little clumsy. Suddenly, your bones do not know how to function. 

 He looks at you expectantly, and it occurs to you that he probably needs to hear you say yes, which makes no sense because he is almost commanding you accompany him tomorrow, not asking. 

"Yes, okay, fine," you tell him.

Tobirama’s eyes wash with relief and he also stands up. He gestures towards the village. 

 "Shall we?"

You raise an eyebrow at him. "What? Determined to take up all my time to make sure I'm not doing any suspicious stuff?"

Tobirama rolls his eyes. "Oh please, not everything is about you." 

You chuckle and you bump your shoulder against his. "Are we….good, then?" 

 "Fine," Tobirama answers, but it is better than nothing. 

"What are we doing tomorrow?" 

 "Assisting the Hokage." 

 "And then?" You keep asking, suddenly determined to make him keep talking to you. It has been so long since you've heard his voice. 

 "Go around the village and see what we can do to help out." 

 "And then?" 

 "Study."

 "Why?" 

 "Because it's important."

"To what?" 

Tobirama sighs tersely and he glances at you. "Improvement. Training." 

 You smile, trying to see if Tobirama will blow his fuse. "All day?"

 "It could extend to several days." 

"That is only if I am free for several days." 

Tobirama rolls his eyes. Surprisingly, he does not grow impatient with you. 

"See if it fits your schedule." Tobirama looks ahead. "If you want to be a jounin-sensei, I can also show you the ropes." Tobirama keeps on walking ahead of you, his steps long and quick. "If you want." 

Tobirama keeps on surprising you. 

You laugh to yourself, but the sound reaches Tobirama and he turns, his face twisted in confusion. 

"What?" 

 "Nothing." You go to him, and you peer at his face. "You're pretty great, I think." 

Tobirama looks away, unsure how to reply. 

 "Don’t be late," Tobirama suddenly says, and he disappears on you, using his flying raijin to conveniently bring him anywhere he wishes. 

You take a deep breath and you fold your arms. You shake your head, but you cannot help the smile spreading across your lips. 

 For some reason, you are looking forward to tomorrow. 

 And for now, you bury your revelations from today. 

.

.

.

[PROLOGUE]

Thank you. 

Those two words are what Tobirama’s mother seemed to tell his father all the time. She looked grateful saying it too. Too grateful to the point that she is cooped up in the Senju compound all the time, with nowhere to go. Tobirama was a smart kid–too smart for his own good–and he saw that the last place she wants to be was here, with family and raising children in this godforsaken war zone. 

 His mother said that was how she met his father, and how she fell in love with him, by the words of gratefulness, but Tobirama is a smart kid. He knew nothing of love, but he could tell that his mother did not love his father. She mistook feelings of gratitude as feelings of love.  

His mother has a cold face, but she was gentle and fierce and was a great story-teller. She told stories of the great mountains and rivers that she has seen before everything fell into disarray. His mother loved art, books, and knowledge. She always encouraged Tobirama and his brothers to pursue their own curiosities beyond war.  

Tobirama always took that to heart. Sure, his body and his mind are well-suited for battle but his interests lie elsewhere. He loves to explore, to discover, to observe and to experiment to prove something foreign to him. He loves to break down something to its smallest detail and build it back up to make something new. He wants to create. 

Thank you. 

Those were two words that were too much for his mother to bear all her life. It weighed on her. It chained her down. 

Thank you. 

Those were her last words to Tobirama. 

Thank you, for being my son, for letting me be your mother. 

Those were two words that stuck to him like a curse. They were binding, until the bitter end. 

.

.

.

[PART ONE, CHAPTER ONE]

The first time Tobirama sees you, he immediately forms the opinion that you are too loud. Loud, in a sense that everything that passes by you, has to pay attention to you. Loud, in a sense that, when you speak, everyone has to hang by your every word. You are too loud, and he immediately concludes that you will not last long in a battle because you seem like an easy target. It is not like him to make fast conclusions without further observation, but you are just so loud that he wants to immediately shut down his senses.

So loud in fact, that even among the crowd, Tobirama cannot help but look your way and be wary of your presence. 

Contrary to what he thinks, you are not that much of a blabbermouth nor a person who speaks aimlessly, but he does not know you yet. He has not even had a chance to look you straight in the face. 

Today, he finds you standing by an umbrella stand, where a dozen colorful and detailed parasols are opened as a display to passerbys. You are in your casual kimono, and because it is spring, there are lovely pink cherry blossoms etched on your left sleeve, spreading towards your chest. Your obi cinches your waist and holds your sword by your side, so that it is easy to rest your hand on top of the hilt. Your hair is held back from your face with a simple hairpiece, and a festival fox mask hangs on the side of your head.

Tobirama stares, not having anything else to look at. 

Hashirama and Madara are also walking around, greeting the citizens of Konoha, and holding children up in the air. Hashirama’s young sons follow closely behind, playfully roughhousing each other and anyone who happens to get in their way. 

Hashirama notices his brother, glaring at a distant point and decides to step in lest Tobirama accidentally offends someone. He knows that his brother does not mean to glower at times. It’s just his eyes are a bit sensitive to the sun. 

At least, that is the reason, most of the time.

Tobirama immediately looks away from you, but Hashirama already saw who he was looking at. He gives Tobirama a curious smile. 

“What?” Tobirama deadpans. 

“You should go talk to her,” Hashirama suggests. “You seem interested.”

Tobirama folds his arms. “No.” 

Hashirama opens his mouth to add another thing, but Tobirama beats him to it. 

“Brother, I said no,” Tobirama affirms, and that was that. 

 Hashirama sighs, and pouts a little. “She’s nice!” 

Tobirama fakes a cough, making sure to spit out the words idiot clearly, and he crosses his arms. “You think everyone is nice.”

“Well, innocent until proven guilty, as they say!” 

Tobirama glances back at you, and finds that he can easily track you. 

 “With all due respect, elder brother, that is a very naive statement coming from you.” 

Tobirama has heard of you and he stops himself from telling Hashirama that, and instead lets him point out that you were one of the newly ranked jounins and that you specialize in kenjutsu. You also have been spending your free time teaching some of the older genins the basics of close range fighting and defense. 

 As the Hokage, Hashirama is more than happy to get to know those who are rising to the ranks and especially those who are gifted. It means that their Academy is working, even though it hasn’t been very long since it was established. You were one of those people from a clan who are already shinobi, but had to be evaluated in order to determine your rank and the Shodaime Hokage saw how skillful you are, despite not being the most powerful user of ninjutsu. He wants Konoha to have dependable teachers who will pass on useful skills and knowledge to whoever wants to learn. 

You start to walk away from the umbrella stand, when suddenly a bunch of kids and teenagers rush towards you. Tobirama sees some young students in the group that he had picked himself. Hiruzen stands out among the rest, loud and rambunctious, while Danzo follows closely behind like a shadow, but as obtrusive.

“Sensei! You should join the sparring competition later! They have bokkens, you’re good with bokkens!” 

You laugh, and try to back out before the others start to make your decision. “I think I will pass!” 

“Aww, no!” 

Tobirama watches the commotion, and then you look towards him. He freezes, as you smile at him and continue to wave him forward. Tobirama glares, because you are still waving at him but he does not know you so obviously he is not going to wave back, but suddenly Madara passes by him and Tobirama almost feels embarrassed. 

  Almost. He checks himself.

The wave was not meant for him.  

He glimpses Madara give a small wave, and this makes him pause.

 Madara waves? Tobirama almost scoffs at this, but he must keep his public appearance. 

You smile warmly, and introduce Madara to the younger children who were starting to cower a little because of his serious and glum expression. Tobirama watches as you slip your arm through Madara’s arm like you have done it many times. Tobirama’s students look at each other, but they do not harbor any bad sentiments toward the Uchiha clan leader. Some of them even crack a smile at the younger children’s reactions. Madara can be a little intimidating at first, if you do not know him.

 Then, you say something to the kids, earning a laugh from them and a small, tight-lipped smile from Madara.

Tobirama notices that the edges of Madara’s eyes have softened, something he only does around Hashirama.

“Are you sure you don’t want to get introduced to her? She is a very warm person,” Hashirama asks. “She’s also very smart and I think you’d benefit from her insights.” 

Tobirama watches her say her goodbyes and pat a few children’s heads, and walk away. “I’m fine.”

 Hashirama looks at Tobirama, doubt painted across his face, but he lets it go. 

 For now. 

//

You stand in front of the Hokage, waiting for him to speak. You have been called early in the morning to meet with him, and you have been there for a few minutes, standing awkwardly. You are not sure whether to start some small talk since the Shodaime is busy peering over a few scrolls. Usually, whenever you see him, the Hokage is pretty chatty and offers a lot of kind words. He also seems to talk a lot about his younger brother to you, bragging about him and his accomplishments, and underwhelmingly explaining his personality, which you find strange. 

It makes you think that there’s something off about Tobirama. 

The door behind you opens and you step to the side to make a wide berth for the incoming person, even though there is enough room for at least a few more people to stand there. Tobirama walks in, his face sporting deep eyebags, but his eyes are hard and alert. You look him over, and your eyes go to his rough hands, where there are dried ink stains on his pale skin. His veins protrude out, blue and green rivers criss-crossing over his hands and up his arms. You see hints of faded scars on his skin, but in this light, his pale skin makes up for the blemishes.

“Brother,” Tobirama greets, although it sounds more like he is about to scold his elder brother. 

 Hashirama smiles and he motions for you to step closer. 

You do, and you feel Tobirama’s eyes track you. You immediately look up and you catch his gaze, which makes him look away. 

“I have a task for the two of you,” Hashirama casually brings up. He looks strangely cheerful. Like he has a step by step plan that went exactly as he wanted. 

You look at the Hokage, all ears. And curious as to why he is acting this way. 

“It has come to my attention that while we are training the next generation to be good shinobis, I do not think that we have a proper and standard curriculum,” Hashirama begins. 

Tobirama’s head snaps upright at this. “Brother, what do you mean?” 

He sounds almost angry, and well, if you were the creator of the education system in the village you built and someone had found flaws in it, you would be too. 

“I think that there should be specific learning materials for each year before graduating to a genin, and so on,” Hashirama elaborates some more. “The two of you are to come up with these materials, and I want you to include other aspects that are not just related to being a shinobi. I want the next generation to not only be bred for war, but to have dispositions in other areas.” 

Hashirama stands up and he places his palms on his desk. “Tobirama, you know this. You want to expand our village, I think this is a good step to make that happen.”

 Tobirama looks at his brother with narrowed, suspicious eyes. He is not an idiot. He knows this is some set up, otherwise, why would his brother call you earlier than him? Why would his brother need you for this? These are the types of things he can accomplish on his own, so why are you here?

 “I understand. Then, I think it is time for that to happen. We are at peace, after all.” 

You slowly raise your hand. You notice that Tobirama does not even glance at you, and you want to laugh. You have heard a few things about Senju Tobirama from his own brother, and while it does not surprise you that he has a prickly attitude, it is another thing to see it upfront. It does not intimidate you, rather, it makes you want to see more of his reactions. He reminds you of the shy children that you have met in the Academy. 

You just need to push the right buttons.

“If I may, Lord Hokage,” you start. 

 Hashirama nods for you to continue. 

“With all due respect, what qualifications did I have to help Lord Tobirama with this new project?” 

You swear you saw Tobirama’s eye twitch from the way you said his title. You hide your smirk by biting the side of your cheek.

Hashirama lets out a small chuckle, in which he earns a glare from his younger brother. 

“I have heard about your dedication in teaching the children when you have the time, and since you insisted that you do not want to be a jounin sensei yet, like my brother is, I think it is a good idea for you to keep your head busy. Besides, I have heard you are quite the quick learner. You will find that my brother here is a very good teacher and can offer guidance well, if you can look past his mean demeanor.” 

Tobirama opens his mouth to snap at his brother, but instead, takes a breath and holds his tongue.

Hashirama gathers up some documents from the corner of his desk. “You two can start tomorrow. I would love to have this done by the end of summer, just as the new school year is upon us.” 

 “Brother, stop being ridiculous. That is in three months,” Tobirama interjects. “I think I’m going to need time to plan.” 

 Hashirama glances at his brother. “Well, luckily for you, someone is here to help you. I have faith in you.” 

“Too much, perhaps,” Tobirama dryly says, not even bothering to hide that he does not like this.  

“And you, as well,” Hashirama says to you with a cheerful smile.

 “Lord Hokage, with all due respect, am I going to get paid enough for this? I am practically jobless, I have a living to make,” you inquire with a smile. “Besides, you may also have to compensate for putting me up with your dear brother.”

In the corner of your eye, Tobirama crosses his arms. 

 Hashirama laughs heartily, and he gives Tobirama a grin. “I like her!” He nods. “You will surely be thanked for your services.” 

He extends the pile of documents towards you and you step forward to accept them. You thank the Hokage with doubt, half-serious about the salary, but you decide to not push it today and you give him a smile. Then, you also smile at Tobirama.

 “I will see you tomorrow then,” you tell him. 

Tobirama carefully gazes at you, and then he nods. He turns to his brother with a determined look on his face. Or an angry look. You are honestly not sure. 

“The Hokage mansion’s library,” Tobirama grounds out curtly. “9 am. Sharp.”

You look at him, wondering what type of bad day he is having to be this abrupt, or if this is how he really is. You understand that he and his brother have been at war for all of their life, so maybe this is how he has turned out.

“I will see you.” You bow quickly and walk out of there, ready to dive into the materials the Hokage gave you. 

//

Madara aims a punch towards your way, but you quickly dodge it and block it with the palm of your hand, and you follow through by sending his movement forward by using his momentum and landing a charged punch to his lower ribs, just where his liver will be. 

Madara chuckles and he flips himself away from you. 

“Brutal,” Madara comments breezily. “That can actually kill someone, but fortunately I’m not just anyone.”

You roll your eyes. “Yeah well, give me an A for effort.”

Madara falters and his eyes narrow at you. He knows as well as you do that you are slacking and there is a lot on your mind. “Is this about what Hashirama told you earlier?”

You meet his eyes and let out a sigh. “Wow, word travels fast.”

Madara starts to walk towards you and he gathers his hair to one side. “That was not fair of him. If you want, I can talk to him about that.” 

You watch Madara’s face, and a cloud passes overhead. You are almost tempted to say yes and cling to the wings that Madara has put you under to shelter you, but you are not that woman anymore. You are not a quitter. Besides, you need to have a purpose to pour your efforts in. If not, then what else could be in store for you? 

“It’s not like the Hokage asked me to cut off my hand, I will be fine, Madara,” you finally answer. “Really.”

Madara folds his arms and he presses his lips together. “If you ever need me to go beat him up then say the word.”

You cannot help the chuckle that escapes your mouth. “I’m sure it’ll be fine. There will be no need of beating.” You pause and a smirk forms on your face as an idea takes form in your mind. “However, you can help me get to know Tobirama.”

Madara scowls, knowing that you are pushing his buttons. “No, you are on your own,” he grits out. 

The air around your friend changes, and suddenly all the silliness in your demeanor fades away. Your eyes narrow warily, as his face darkens at you with disapproval. You know that he still holds a grudge on Tobirama, and it really is quite low of you to mention him so casually. 

 Madara narrows his eyes at you and shakes his head. "You have some guts." 

You point your chin towards him naughtily. "Everyone's fair game." You break out into a smile, even if Madara can decide right then and there to end your life. "You just can't take it."

Madara used to always intimidate you, and he furthered that feeling at times by showing you his sharingan, because you know, you know , what he is capable of doing with those eyes, but he never really did anything to you. It was more of the idea of what he can do to you, at any given time. 

 Madara stays silent for a few more moments. Then, he attempts to soften his voice. “What do you want to know?” 

You raise an eyebrow at this. “Uchiha Madara is finally giving in?” 

 Madara rolls his eyes and he lets out a small, tight-lipped smile. "Just this once, but you are paying for lunch.” 

 You gasp, taking offense at this. “You do know I am broke, right?” 

“Who’s fault was it for not taking my offer to live in the Uchiha compound?” Madara matches his footsteps with yours as the two of you head towards the village. 

“First of all, I am not an Uchiha, your people will oust me the moment I step foot, and second, I want to make a living for myself.” 

Madara rolls his eyes. “Yeah, but you’re all alone.”

 “Aren’t you?” You retort without thought.

 Madara falls into silence. “You know someday, you will get in trouble with that mouth of yours.” 

“You just can’t handle me.” 

 “The offer still stands,” Madara mutters, and he glances at you. “And it’s safe there. I will make sure no one even says a bad word about you. If you are with me, they won’t even look at you.” 

“That sounds like a lonely life, and you know that I have been mostly caged in my childhood.” You sigh and you bump your shoulder against his arm. “I appreciate everything you have done for me, but I have nothing, Madara. It’s time I do something for myself and invest in something bigger than me. I need that.” 

//

The Hokage mansion is huge inside, and since you do not visit this place often, you are not sure where the said library is. It could just be any room in here. Or, there is no such thing as the library in the Hokage mansion and Tobirama just said that because he wants to avoid you and send you on a goosechase away from him. You know that he is not thrilled to be put up on this project with you, based on his expressions yesterday, but you are kind of determined to change his mind now. 

 Besides, you are fun and cool, something he can take notes on as he seems prudish. 

  You sigh as you decide to just wait for Tobirama outside, instead of wandering inside the mansion. There are still some parts being built, and you do not want to cause any trouble to the workers there. 

You are quite early, hoping to beat Tobirama to the punch to solidify yourself in his good graces and show him that you are serious about this. However, due to your punctuality, the waiting time is becoming ridiculously long. Sometimes you are not big on the whole waiting patiently thing.

You sigh, and aimlessly walk around the whole building. 

  You hear people starting to mile about to start their day, and you hear children laughing and talking loudly among themselves, which brings a smile to your lips. You decide to stay near the entrance of the mansion so Tobirama will not have any trouble looking for you. 

Lost in your thoughts, you brandish your blade from its scabbard and you start to draw stick figures on the soil, and you add little details such as trees, kunais and shurikens. 

You are not sure how much Tobirama knows about you, but you have heard many things about him, mostly from his brother, both good and bad. You know that he is a great warrior and one of the most brilliant minds that his generation has seen. He is responsible for the complex system of the very village you reside in, and the Hokage’s trusted advisor, even more than Uchiha Madara, who you know is very close to Hashirama. You also know that he is a great sensei, according to his students, which you have no doubt about since he is very intelligent. 

Personality wise, he remains a mystery to you. Mostly because Hashirama glosses over that when talking about him. All you know is that Tobirama can be difficult at times, but you figure that it is how one should act when you are at the forefront of leading this village.

However, you are not in the least intimidated, even if he is a little older and has experienced more in life. Now that you are going to be working with him more, you are curious as to what the famed Senju Tobirama is really all about. 

“I hope I did not keep you waiting,” Tobirama’s rough voice interrupts the quiet that you have immersed yourself in. 

  You perk up, and put your sword back with a loud click. He glances down at the ground, where you have made silly stick figures of shinobis fighting. You attempt to erase them with your foot. 

“Not at all!” You lie, but Tobirama sees through that and he narrows his eyes suspiciously. 

His serious face does not change, and instead you think he grew even more serious. He nods and gestures towards the mansion. He clutches the books and the scrolls he has close to his body.

 “Shall we?” 

You follow Tobirama towards the entrance, trying to keep up with his long strides, though he seems to be speeding up on purpose. Finally, he unlocks the library doors and opens them wide. The two of you step in, and you cannot help but feel underwhelmed at the great reveal of the Hokage mansion’s library. 

It is bare, with a lone wooden table and three chairs situated next to the windows. 

 To the side are empty bookshelves, with the exception of one shelf, which is almost halfway filled. 

“This is a sorry library,” you comment under your breath. 

 Tobirama walks up to the table and puts down the materials he has been carrying. 

  “We are going to fill it, starting today,” Tobirama says. “And for the rest of the year.” 

You raise an eyebrow. “How? Write and publish our own books?” 

  Tobirama glances up at you, without irony. “Yes.”  

You feign a smile.  “Oh,” you deadpan. He does seem like the type of person to do that.

“We are also going to visit every clan in the village and ask if we could transcribe some of their writings,” Tobirama continues. “We can make our references through that, integrate their history and make a comprehensive one for Konoha. We also need to learn some of their jutsus and study them, among other things.” 

  You nod, understanding what he means. “Alright, where do we start? And how do we rewrite the Academy curriculum part?” 

“Well first, I will have to set a few rules,” Tobirama drones on, looking at you pointedly.  

You walk towards him so that you are standing on the other side of the table. “Alright, shoot,” you say. 

“I have written the deadlines of the parts that you will do. You must give them to me, on time ,” Tobirama sternly says, slipping one of the scrolls forward. “I have a vague plan of what the curriculum can look like, but you will also have the chance to express your ideas.” 

  You take the scroll and open it gingerly, and you look at the back to back due dates. 

“You must not talk to me aimlessly, unless it is about this project or if you need any clarification on the tasks you have to do,” Tobirama continues. “When we are working, I expect you to only work.”

You nod, thinking that these are easy, reasonable rules. 

  “You must be punctual.” 

  You are way too punctual, so you know that you are going to follow this rule perfectly. 

“Do not eat near me.” 

  At this, you almost roll your eyes, but you hold yourself back. 

  “Do not touch my things, unless I give them to you. I hope that you can call my title with respect,” Tobirama drones on and on, mostly about the little things he is apparently very particular about. “You will also be training with me and my students, and I expect you to always be on top of your game.” 

“Yes, of course.” You blink at all his so-called rules, and fight the urge to roll your eyes. It’s like he already has the impression that you won’t be as dedicated to your job as he is. 

  But you are dedicated. 

However, you cannot help but talk back. He probably made a rule for that, but it goes unheard by you. 

Tobirama nods. “Very well.” 

  “Did you stay up all night making this up?” You ask, unable to help yourself garner some reaction from him. 

Tobirama’s stare is stormy, and his eyes narrow strictly. “It is common sense that you abide by such unsaid rules.”

  “But you just, well forgive me, enumerated them. If they are common sense, then you would not have to re-tell it.” 

Tobirama lets out a stream of breath from his nose that sounds a tad bit impatient, and he rolls his eyes. 

  You smile, feeling a little triumphant at getting a reaction from him. He catches your expression and he schools his face to become serious once more.

The two of you sit in silence for a moment, and you wait for Tobirama to speak. 

  “I heard you teach at the Academy at times,” Tobirama suddenly brings up. “When did you start?” 

  Your eyes narrow slightly at this. Tobirama built the Academy, so he must be aware of the things happening there. “Almost a year ago.” 

  Tobirama taps a finger on the books that he set down. “And you teach when?” 

“Wednesdays and Fridays,” you reply. 

Tobirama nods. “I will be coming with you.” 

You pause at this. “Wait, why?” 

Tobirama looks at you as if it’s obvious. “To size up what the kids need to learn, observe which materials are appropriate for age groups until they graduate as genin, and so forth.”  

Of course, that makes sense. 

Tobirama pulls out the chair and he slides into it. “Then, let us begin. We have many things to research and read up on.” 

You look at him as he opens the books, and distributes some of them to you. 

  “Will you get around to telling me what your plan is, or are you just going to let me guess?” You ask as you flip to the first page of one of the books that he handed to you.

You slide on the chair across from him, taking care to move to the side so that you are giving him his space. 

“Silence, when I am working,” Tobirama states without looking up from what he is reading. “Do not talk to me aimlessly. You will get a chance to ask me questions later, I suggest you start listing them down.”

  “Alright, alright,” you mumble. 

You read the first paragraph of the book, already taking note of the main idea. After a few pages, however, you glance up at your book and to Tobirama, who has not moved an inch except to turn a page. You observe his pristine expression, your eyes going down the slope of his strong nose, his high cheekbones, and his lips that form into a pout, and then to the markings on his face and chin.

  He’s handsome, you’ll give him that. 

His eyes never waver, unlike you, and from this, you can tell that he always pours all his focus and efforts when he does something. 

“Work,” Tobirama reminds you. “And look at the due dates so you can think about how you can strategize your time.” 

You snap up and pretend to go back to your reading, but you glance at him one last time. Something about him piques your curiosity, and it makes you want to push his buttons just to see what the famed Senju Tobirama is all about. 

 You cannot help but let out a tiny smile and you raise the book to hide your face. 

Well, if he already has some sort of prejudice towards you, you might as well play that to your advantage. 

You smirk to yourself, finally looking forward to the time the two of you will spend together. 

.

.

.

Tobirama has always been a volatile man, as opposed to his almost calm demeanor—as calm as a storm is before it wreaks havoc, that is. He has a penchant for disappearing for days on end, and sometimes those disappearances lead to great discoveries, and sometimes, they bring big trouble. Like right now. 

Tobirama, to put it in Hashirama’s terms, has been moping around, and in order to distract others from the fact that he is moping , Tobirama had the brilliant idea of inventing a weapon that shoots straight lightning out of its hilt. The consequences are dire, as it almost ended up singeing Tobirama’s eyebrows off. It also left several burn marks on Tobirama’s arms and hands, and Hashirama is not okay with watching Tobirama have no regard for himself. 

He knows his brother is feeling guilty over what he pulled with you, and your sudden leave confused Tobirama. Hashirama thinks that maybe, just maybe, Tobirama hates your absence.

Life has been pretty quiet for Tobirama these days. In which there is one less person in his life that can only stand up and point out his mistakes. Hashirama tries to keep him busy by sending him to travel all over the country, and he was also hoping that somehow, by some serendipitous fate, Tobirama would be able to meet her. 

However, she was nowhere to be found, and Tobirama does his job perfectly, albeit with a more closed off air that Hashirama has not seen him put on since they were younger. 

Hashirama does not want to give his brother false hopes–not that Tobirama is eager to buy into that either. No, what Tobirama needs right now, is something he can hold on to, physically. 

And so that led him to dragging Tobirama into their weapons storage past midnight. 

Tobirama was murmuring under his breath grumpily, his arms crossed and eyes darting around as if he expected the shadows to jump at him, to grab him by their claws and swallow him whole. 

“Ah, here it is!” Hashirama exclaimed excitedly. 

  Tobirama frowned, clearly displeased at being interrupted from his work to look at old Senju weapons. 

“Oh, don’t look at me like that,” Hashirama reprimanded. “I am doing this for you.” 

Tobirama rolled his eyes, but he gave Hashirama a chance. He held out his hands, and his elder brother placed a blade on his palms. 

  “Draw it,” Hashirama advised. 

  Tobirama glanced at his brother, doubtful, but he did as he said. 

Tobirama stared at the steel in front of him, not sure what he was supposed to be looking at. 

“What did she tell you about her family?” Hashirama inquires. 

 Tobirama shrugs and he sheathes the blade. “Not much. She said she had to run from them.” 

“Did she tell you why?” 

Tobirama shook his head no. 

Hashirama stared at his brother, and he tapped a finger against the scabbard. “That blade was made by her family.”

Tobirama’s eyes widened. “What?” His breath quickened. 

  “And many other swords. Of course, we made most of our weapons, but we were warriors first, we had to get them somewhere,” Hashirama continued. “Her family, however, had to stop because their craft was sought after by many clans. This resulted in them being hunted so that they could steal their secrets.” 

Tobirama unsheathed the sword again, and he thought about the first time she disarmed him. She seemed to know a lot about swords. 

“Her family married off to merchants and other craftsmen that spread them out, but before that, they had no choice but to do whatever it took so that their women and children could not be taken away to fight or to be exploited for their craft.”

Tobirama thought about the things she told him before, like her having to run from her family because they end up killing the women and children in it. The lies she told were closer to the truth than he thought. It is just that she knew how to tell a story without revealing the whole plot. 

 Tobirama clutched the hilt and he pressed his lips together. He kept quiet as Hashirama led him out of the storage room, his hand gentle on his shoulder, steering him so that he does not bump into walls. 

“Will you be alright, if I leave you alone?” Hashirama asked his brother. 

Tobirama does not see himself letting go of the blade anytime soon. “Yes. I’m a grown man.”  

Hashirama nodded. “I will talk to Mito to stop the arranged marriage dates. You should be free to choose who you want to be with. It is not like it is required of you, just because I had one.” 

  Tobirama glanced at his elder brother. 

“You have many responsibilities, Tobirama, but one of those is not with love.”

 Tobirama frowned. “What are you talking about?” 

 Hashirama smiled knowingly. “Oh, please. I know you, brother.” 

Tobirama looked away from his brother’s gaze. “It doesn’t matter.” 

“I just want you to be okay, Tobirama,” Hashirama gave his shoulder one last squeeze and left him with those words. 

//

 Hashirama peers at you and Tobirama, his eyes darting between your face and his brother. He scrutinizes the small distance between your shoulders, and the way neither of you seem to want to look each other in the eye, but there is no hint of awkwardness or any hostility between the two of you at the moment. He is relieved that the two of you made up because to be frank, he cannot stand Tobirama’s worsening irateness from the past two years. He knows his brother more than anyone else in this world, knows him like his own mind, and he knows that his brother initially liked you. For him to come to terms with that, is a different thing to Tobirama. 

The Hokage sighs to himself. At least the two of you seem to be on good terms again. 

“The flower festival is coming, and many visitors from outside the village are coming to participate,” Hashirama begins. “I’ll task the two of you with providing them hospitality, entertainment, and the like. They will arrive in three weeks.” 

Hashirama watches the two of you nod at the same time. He smiles kindly at you. 

“I heard that you are interested in being a sensei?” Hashirama inquires, suddenly changing the topic. 

Tobirama narrows his eyes at him, signaling him to stop talking. 

Your eyes slide to Tobirama briefly, then you direct your gaze to the Hokage. “Not really...but I’m thinking about it.” 

Hashirama grins, and Tobirama glares daggers at him, willing him to be quiet. The tips of his ears are noticeably pink. Hashirama knows that this is what happens when he is embarrassed.

“That’s good,” Hashirama chirps. “You will now be working even closer with Tobirama. I think you’ll be as great as him–he does make astounding students.” 

Your face falls at this, and Hashirama is suddenly mystified. 

 You let out a strained chuckle and your eyes go to your feet. “I don’t think it will be to that extent, but since I have a lot of free time these days, I’ll have to try something new.” 

“Is that all?” Tobirama interjects, but not because he is trying to be rude or curt. Hashirama sees his eyes go to you, a hint of worry in them. 

“Yes, yes,” Hashirama finally says. Maybe he said something wrong? 

The two of you quickly bow and hurry out of his office, and Hashirama wonders if something is finally blossoming between the two of you. 

//

Tobirama hates the way his eyes can’t seem to avoid tracking you. He knows that something has made you upset, but he cannot put a finger on it. He finds himself being willing to fix whatever it is that has made you upset, and he tries to pull all the stops for himself. He should not get ahead of himself. He does not know yet what you feel towards him, and if anything, he knows that it has been impossible to get along with him so he does not expect you to harbor any attachment towards him. Besides, he does not want to impose his feelings on you. He is responsible for his own heart and he will never give that burden to you. 

 And maybe, just maybe, given the time, these feelings will go away like a purchased item from a store with a return receipt. Better yet, maybe being around you more will make him see more of your flaws and make him realize that this has all been a long, running (and cruel) joke and that it is just an attraction to the unknown and the unfamiliar. 

 Of all the logic Tobirama surrounds himself in, these reasons are one of the most ridiculous ones he has ever come up with. 

 However, despite his many reasons, nothing stops him from calling your name in a tone he does not recognize himself. 

 You turn to him, eyes clearing into a more inquiring gaze. 

“I have some books for you,” Tobirama says, instead of asking if you are alright. “To study.” 

You frown for a second, but then your face brightens. “Oh yeah!” 

 Tobirama studies your face, trying to read in between your expressions, but he knows that he will find nothing, unless you give him an inch. 

And you rarely ever do. 

Your eyes are on him as well, and he reckons that this must be your expression when you are thinking. 

“Also, about that flower festival, when will it be?” You ask him, and the two of you walk together, your steps matching in tandem. 

 Tobirama leads the way towards the library, where a stack of books awaits you. He spent last night and this morning picking these books and tucking in several notes for you to read. He hopes that you pay attention to them. 

“About a month from now,” Tobirama replies. “It’s just a normal festival that the Yanamaka clan chooses to include the rest of the village in.” 

 “What do you do?” 

 Tobirama shrugs. “Who knows? I’ve never really been.” 

You raise your eyebrows in surprise. “Why not?” 

 “It’s not my thing,” Tobirama slowly states. He opens the doors to the library, and he steps aside to let you enter first. 

“Well, then you have got to go in this one!” You smile at him. “I’ll go with you and drag your ass out if I have to.”

 Tobirama shakes his head in amusement. “We’ll see.” 

You shrug. “Is that a challenge?” 

 Tobirama rolls his eyes. “Everything is a challenge for you.” 

 You let out a breezy chuckle. “Well, excuse me for trying to find something to stave off boredom. Sometimes hanging out with you isn’t as fun as you’d think.” 

Tobirama gives you a look and he leads you to a table and gestures at the books sitting on it. “There’s your remedy for your boredom.” 

Tobirama tries not to smirk at the way your face withers at the sight of the thick books laid out before you. 

“Again?” You ask him, dubiously. 

 “Finish them by next week,” Tobirama says. “It’s a must. There is much to know about chakra natures. The theories you’ve read last time were just the surface.” 

You put a hand on one of the books, your eyes growing determined. You nod to yourself as if you are psyching yourself up. “Okay. I’ll do it.” 

 Tobirama finds that he feels proud of you. He keeps that to himself, though. 

“Right,” he almost stammers, but Tobirama is a man of composure, and he does not stammer. “Well, let’s get to planning for that festival, shall we?” 

You smirk at him, and Tobirama freezes and he is caught off guard. Something about this scene is both familiar and new to him, and it is almost easy to fall back to the way the two of you used to do things. 

“Just like old times,” you speak his thoughts out for him. 

Tobirama nods, and his breath catches in his throat as you smile at him genuinely. “Yes,” he says, his voice stiff. 

You roll your eyes at him as you pull your old chair away from the desk. “Lighten up! I won’t give you a hard time!” 

Tobirama goes to his seat across from you, and he gives you an exasperated look. “Please, if I have learned anything, it is that you never make it easy for me.” 

 You shrug, and you fold your hands underneath your chin. “So. Any idea where to begin?” 

Tobirama sighs to himself. He has never been one to attend festivals, and the fact that he has to show a bunch of people around the village and ensure that they have a grand time makes him feel weary. Hashirama is more suited to these kinds of things. Entertaining and accommodating are not his suit.

“First, we need to find a place for them to stay at, and make sure that we can cater for their meals, and whatnot,” Tobirama starts off, his mind already racing to come up with a plan. There are several places opening up in Konoha that can house many people and also provide relaxing baths and excellent food. 

 However, you interrupt his running thoughts. 

“How about the mansion?” You suggest. 

Tobirama’s eyes snap to you. “Here?” 

 You shrug. “It’s a huge place to keep them all inside. The location’s practical. The courtyard below is empty and the space is enough to gather many people. We can have the festival in this area too, so that everyone does not have to travel around, if that is not too much trouble for the Yanamaka clan.”

Tobirama blinks. It does make sense. 

“And you know, they’re coming from outside. It is easy to group them in one place and keep an eye on them, just in case…” 

Tobirama nods, and he writes it down. “That seems plausible. We do have to get people to help us set up the beds and make this place more comfortable and neat.”

 “Enlist the Genins to help, as well as your students too. That way, everyone gets to participate. We can get jounins to supervise and guard the area and all that.” 

Tobirama finds it agreeable that you do not have to guess around with him and instead, spells out the direction his thoughts are taking him. 

“As for entertainment…” Tobirama begins. “We should hold an event to welcome them.”

 “Do we have dancers? I do remember some time ago, when you were sending me around on those crazy errands that we do have some musicians in the village.” 

 Tobirama rolls his eyes. “Those errands were necessary.” 

“Sure,” you give him an amused look. 

“I am not sure about dancers, but if there are musicians, there are bound to be some.” 

“Alright, then let’s start now!” You exclaim, pushing back your chair. It squeaks against the floor in protest. 

Tobirama cringes. You never lose your ability to keep him on his toes and test his levels of patience and tolerability. 

 Somehow, he does not find himself complaining. He is surprised that it does not bother him as much like before.

//

You are starting to hate the way you cannot make yourself meet his eyes for a longer period of time. Tobirama’s gaze is intense and piercing, and it never really bothered you as much before, but now, you feel like you are burning under them. If he was trying to figure you out before with his scrutinizing gazes, this time, he is peeling you layer by layer, and soon enough, he will get to the core. You are apprehensive to that thought, since Tobirama did compare you to an empty can back then. You feel more vulnerable since Tobirama seems to no longer focus on your farces. At least, having an activity to do makes you feel at ease since your thoughts are somewhere else. 

 Then again, you hope that Tobirama does not think of you like that anymore. A part of you wants him to seek what is underneath your mask. Maybe he may not like what he sees, but at least you’ve tried. 

The two of you walk through the streets of the village, and your attention is easily caught by the little details around you, like the stall of pinwheels, colorful kites that are shaped like animals, and red and gold lanterns. 

You wave at kids that happen to look at you, and you playfully glare at babies in their mothers' arms, earning a startle of a cry. 

"Stop that," Tobirama reprimands. 

 "Heh," you sigh sheepishly. You inch closer to him, trying to gauge his reaction by the small between the two of you. 

He seems to tolerate you a lot more than before. You wonder how much you can push his buttons before you can get something more from him. Just because he sees you as a student to mentor or a normal citizen to help, does not mean you have to refrain from your old antics. Besides, his company is enough. 

At least by annoying him, you are able to affect him. 

Tobirama glances at you as you bump your shoulder against his, and then his eyes come forward to watch his steps.

You grin at him, as the surroundings are becoming more familiar to you.

"Hey, remember this street?" You bring up mischievously.

 Tobirama pauses to think, and when he comes to a revelation, a shudder seems to go through his features. 

 "You mean the street where you decided to put on a ridiculous show to humiliate me?"  

You laugh. "It'll be funny if I pull something as ridiculous as pretending you pushed me." 

 Tobirama sighs, exasperated. "Please, don’t." He is practically begging. 

 "Come on, it will be just like old times." 

Tobirama stares at you incredulously, but your eyes catch a quaint shop. 

"Hey, let's check that out!"

"Wait," Tobirama blurts out but he does nothing to stop you from dragging his sleeve towards the shop. 

The air inside smells of a thick, warm aroma of coffee, and you gasp as you peruse over the desserts on the menu. 

"It'd be good if we can order some of these in bulk for our visitors to try," you suggest.

Tobirama raises an eyebrow in suspicion. "Not for you to binge on?" He deadpans. 

 You throw him a glare, but then you can't help but break into a smile. "So you've discovered my ulterior motive! Do you want a gold star to come with it?" 

Tobirama rolls his eyes. "Please. Just say your order." 

 You look at him, puzzled. "I can pay…"

 "Let me, as I will also put in an order for the said desserts for the visitors,” Tobirama coolly says, already stepping up to the counter and fishing out his pouch of money. 

You grow quiet, and you step forward to his side. You suddenly feel shy. Tobirama is being nice today and you wonder if that implies something else. 

Maybe he’s just actually just being nice because he is actually a nice person and is only looking out like he would look out for anyone in general. 

 You try not to think about it too much, so you tear yourself away after ordering and plop into an empty table to wait. From your seat, you observe Tobirama, out of mere curiosity to find something new about him and not just to make him uncomfortable. However, you find yourself admiring minute details, such as the tip of his nose and the way his lips jut out on his side profile when he slightly pouts. Your eyes unfocus towards the floor, still thinking about Tobirama’s lips when his shadow suddenly appears on your line of vision and you start, as if you are caught with your hand on the jar. 

Tobirama’s eyes narrow. “Are you alright?” 

 You hope that your face and your neck are not turning red, because it suddenly feels very hot here. “Yes,” you say quickly. 

Tobirama nods and he slides to the chair across from you. “Where are you staying?” He seems to lean forward, as if he needs that little space to hear you better. 

 You hum, trying to buy yourself time to answer. You cannot really lie to him anymore, because not only will he know, you also just want to start being honest with him. You do not want him to think badly of you anymore.

Normally you would not care if someone is misconstrued towards you, in fact, it’s what protects you from getting discovered—but with Tobirama, you feel at ease to share more. You want him to get to know you and see that maybe there is something else to you than an empty can. You’re not just loud. 

 Of all the words he has said to you, being called an empty can is what sticks out. 

 You shoot your shot. You are willing to let him in. 

“I’m staying with Madara for now,” you reply and you watch his reaction. You know, from what Madara has told you that the two of them do not really get along. They are civil, at best.

 “Oh,” Tobirama slowly says. He is expressionless. 

Your order is called out and the two of you straighten up to get it. 

 “Let me,” Tobirama murmurs, already jumping to his feet. 

You watch the back of his head as he goes get your food, and when he is turning to go back, you look away. 

 Once Tobirama is on his chair again, he serves you your order and you smile sheepishly at the action. 

“I can help you find a new place, if you want,” Tobirama says quietly, after a moment of silence. 

 “Okay,” you say, because you want it. 

Tobirama’s eyes are on you for a minute too long, and you try not to think about it because you are starting to feel giddy over that prospect. Maybe using up all the hours he is willing to spend with you is something you can be content with. You don’t want to encourage his image of you being just another citizen of Konoha or the proverbial empty can, but you also cannot resist the chance to be near him to learn more about him by garnering reactions from him. You bite a smile away, and turn your attention to your food. 

 //

  A few days later, Tobirama is nowhere to be seen. You are beyond miffed because on top of organizing the preparations for the incoming visitors and arranging the festival with the Yanamaka clan, you are also tasked by Hashirama to keep up with his share of work. You can tell that Hashirama also knows nothing about Tobirama’s disappearance because he is a little frantic and more strict with you and tends to be more demanding with the work that is required of you. He wants it exactly the way Tobirama does his job and while you have an idea of what Tobirama does, actually doing his job is daunting. Who knew being the right-hand to the Hokage was stressful?

You try to delegate, but most of the stuff that Tobirama is entrusted with is something you just have to learn by thinking on your feet. You are not one for organization because it is easy to lose track of things, but in an environment where Hashirama is the one harping on you, the pressure springs you to action. 

There are mountains of papers everywhere, some you have to read or stack on a pile. There are deliveries and visits and meetings all day, and it makes your head dizzy with all the information to report and you think you may have mixed up a thing or two, but you just have to deal at the moment until you find the free time to search for the younger Senju. 

You curse Tobirama throughout the day, and the only thing keeping you going is the sweet revenge you will enact on him. A sock on the face will do him well. 

You are suffering. 

 You are also even more annoyed at the fact that Tobirama said all these things he will help you with, but he leaves you alone to go who knows where. 

As the day slows down, you start to brainstorm his whereabouts, and the worry that builds from that begins to eat at you. What if he did something as dangerous as wiping his mind again? What if Tobirama is in trouble? 

 The thought puts you on edge. You remember telling him that you should be there if he chooses to experiment on himself. 

You are not there right now. 

You are frustrated. No one has ever made you worry this much. You think you are about to be sick. 

When night comes, and you have managed to make it through the day with the added responsibilities, you give Hashirama a quick bow and you bursted out running from his office. You are going to try and find him and give him a piece of your mind. 

You first go through the Hokage mansion, and you find no signs of him, you comb through the training grounds, the streets of Konoha, and even had the courage to sneak into the Senju compound, looking for signs of him. You find none and your searching makes you feel like a fool. 

You go back towards the Uchiha compound, ready to talk off Madara’s ear about your day, when you spot Hiruzen and Danzo walking towards you. You hurry to them, and the two visibly perk up with your presence. 

“Sensei!” Hiruzen greets. 

 Danzo greets you enthusiastically as well. 

“Have you guys seen your sensei?” You ask them, and they must have been worried about the same thing because Hiruzen’s face wrinkles with concern. 

 “He may be in his lab again,” Hiruzen replies solemnly.  

You raise an eyebrow. 

“Sometimes this happens,” Hiruzen elaborates. “It won’t take long, but when he gets busy, he tends to get really obsessive over his work or inventions...when this happens, he usually never tells anyone and then he disappears.” 

 You bite the inside of your cheek. “Not even his own brother?” 

“No,” Danzo replies. “It just happens out of nowhere, without warning.” 

“It’s not like him,” you state. 

 “Yeah…” The two boys look at each other, then at you. 

“I guess I’ll go tell Lord Hokage, though he may already know by now. They’re brothers,” you say, but it is more to yourself. 

You excuse yourself and you head towards the Senju compound again, but a part of you does not want to go near it. The other part wants you to go to Tobirama instead. For a moment, your feet do not move. 

 But your mind has made up itself. 

 Your steps slowly lead you towards the location of Tobirama’s lab. You have an inkling of where it is, but you actually have not been there before. One of it is underground, and the other is nearer to the Senju compound, near the forest. 

However, before you can get far, a familiar silhouette is walking into your own direction, head down, and mindlessly muttering to themself. 

 You pause, and narrow your eyes at the sight. 

It is Tobirama, but he looks disheveled. His white hair is tousled more than usual, and when he passes by under a streetlight, his eyes are frenzied by a storm and his face has shadows in it. 

Instead of the worry you felt earlier, you suddenly feel anger. It is an anger that you do not feel often and so nothing stops you from going up to him and making him halt his steps. 

Tobirama looks alarmed when he sees you, and it takes all of your will not to land a slap on his face. 

“Where the fuck have you been?!” You exclaim. 

Tobirama’s eyes are wide, and they look different. His jaw tenses, and he moves his trembling hands behind his back. 

“What are you doing here?” Tobirama says in a monotonous tone. 

“Looking for your ass!” You almost shout. However, instead of complaining about what you had to do today, you blurt out your worries for him. “I thought something bad had happened to you!” 

 Tobirama’s eyes soften slightly, but he looks away. “I’ll be fine.” 

Tobirama turns to walk away, but you will not have it with him. He is not going to get away from your sight if you can help it. 

You close the distance between the two of you, and you begin to weave signs. Then, you reach out to slap his wrist, and a string made from your chakra and his forms between you two. 

Tobirama whirls around and he pulls his wrist back, and in turn, pulls you closer to him. 

“What is this?” His tone lowers dangerously.  

“You like it?” You challenge haughtily. “I made it myself. Took some time perfecting it, but your books and your lessons really helped.”

Something glimmers in Tobirama’s eyes, and you find that it is close to pride, because you see that expression on Madara’s face whenever you do something that he approves of. 

You step closer to Tobirama until he is forced to meet your eyes. “You can’t undo it. Only I can.” 

Tobirama narrows his eyes and tries to lean his head back. “How wise of you. Now enjoy the consequences of what you’ve done.” 

 You frown at him, but before you can come up with a retort, the ground lurches under you and the sky swirls in colors of brown and blue and gray. There are no more trees, no more houses surrounding you. There is no moon and its stars. You are hyper-aware of Tobirama’s presence but everything is moving too fast, and it feels like you are hurtling towards a cliff, only that cliff gets farther and farther away, delaying the inevitable with the knowledge that you’ll run out of steps. There are many voices fading in and out, and when the world settles, you lose your vision temporarily and you fall to the ground, feeling queasy. 

You groan, but before you can even get back your senses, you are sent into that dizzying space again, and you close your eyes because it feels like you are about to slam into a wall any moment now. 

It doesn’t feel like falling, exactly. It just makes you feel part of something bigger, like there is an infinite amount of knowledge and your brain cannot process it at a human speed. 

Finally, it stops, and you manage to stay on your feet. 

Tobirama tugs at your joined wrists. “Undo this.” 

 “No,” you tell him stubbornly. You swallow the incoming vomit from the back of your throat. 

“Undo it or you will spend the rest of the night travelling like this.” 

You glare at his direction because at the moment, you are seeing double. “Is this your idea of taking a lady around the village? Because you suck. No wonder no woman wants to marry you.” 

You focus your vision just in time to see Tobirama scowl. 

Tobirama tugs again, and it closes the distance between you two. You bump into him roughly, and the mere motion makes you want to–

You keel over and you empty your stomach, nearly missing Tobirama’s feet. Nearly. You are spot on. 

“Bitch…” Tobirama hisses. 

“Bastard,” you croak out. 

“Not you,” Tobirama says through gritted teeth. “It feels fucking warm.”

You cringe, not liking the taste of bile in your mouth. “Uh, well. Sorry.” 

Tobirama shakes his wrist to remind you, and you quickly undo the string that is attaching you to him. You glimpse his fingers slightly shaking. He hefts a sigh, and while his eyes remain dark and cloudy, there is relief on his features. Like you have broken him out of a suffocating room. 

“Are you okay?” You ask him, after what seems like hours. 

“Not really, you just vomited on me.” 

“That is on you, my lord.” 

“You’re ridiculous.” 

“Yeah, yeah.” 

Tobirama’s face twists. “I’m going to go home.” 

You turn your head away from him, the embarrassment starting to grow on you. “I’m sorry. I'm really sorry.” 

“It’s...fine.”

“No, it’s not. I just threw up on you!” You want him to react some more, really let out some sort of cathartic action.

 “I said, it’s fine. So it’s fine.”

“Why do you keep repeating the same words? You can tell me the truth. You can tell me you hate me too, for throwing up on you.” 

Tobirama lets out a frustrated noise that is unbecoming of him. “I don’t hate you. You just...you never shut up. So just stop.” 

 You shoot him a glare. “I have been worrying over you all day.”

 “Don’t,” Tobirama snaps. “I’m fine.” 

 You tighten your fists. “No, you’re not!” 

Tobirama’s eyes swim, and for a moment, he looks so vulnerable that it makes your heart twist. 

“Why?” Tobirama demands. His eyes watch you carefully. “Why care?” 

You throw up your hands, not really sure how to answer that without revealing your secret feelings. “I don’t know! Maybe because you’re important to this village. You have a good head between your shoulders, Tobirama. Your mind is brilliant. You are needed by your brother, this village, your students...” 

And I want you to be okay...I just want you....

You shake those thoughts out. 

The light in Tobirama’s eyes dies, as if he is disappointed by your answer. 

“I see.” 

 “Yeah,” you follow up awkwardly. 

Tobirama turns away and this time, you let him go. Every step he takes that is away from you is like a thorn finding its home into the muscle of your heart, and it hurts to breathe and there are tears pricking your eyes. You do not really understand this feeling, just that it is unbearable and that all you want to do is go to him and make sure he is alright. Maybe liking someone also hurts this badly. You want to shout at him, and maybe that will make you feel better. 

“If it’s your experiments,” you suddenly blurt out, despite the fact that you want to keep quiet. “I’ll help, okay? I told you, long ago. I’ll be there.” 

Tobirama stops, and his shoulders, seemingly pulled up over him by puppet strings, lowers. “You might regret that. I’m not the most ideal companion.” 

“Me neither, but we’ve made it this far.” 

A sigh escapes his lips, but it sounds light-hearted. “Maybe you’re right.” 

Your reply dies on your tongue, and you watch him walk away. You exhale through your nose slowly, and when you feel calm again, you start your way home. 

You make a mental note to yourself to look out for Tobirama some more. Someone has to. No one else really seeks him out, except for his brother. The others seem to be hesitant to. 

Your heart feels heavy as you walk home. You hope that tomorrow can be better for Tobirama. 

.

.

.

“You’re really going?” Madara inquires. He is seated in front of you, with a small wooden table between. A candle and two cups of tea sits on its surface. 

 You smile at him. “Yeah. I need to make amends. Help out those who need help and be good, whatever that means.” 

 Madara’s eyebrows knit in worry. “I could come with you.” 

You let out a chuckle and you reach for your friend’s hand. “It’s okay. I can handle my own. You know I need to do this.”

 Madara looks at you doubtfully, then he stares at your hand on top of his. For a moment, the two of you sit in silence. You glance at Madara’s face, the candle light flickering shadows on his skin. You notice the dark bags underneath his eyes and you worry about whether he is not getting any sleep. Madara moves his hand to cover yours, and he squeezes it. 

“I…” Madara starts. He presses his thin lips together. 

 You raise your eyebrows up, expectant. 

 “Nevermind,” Madara sighs. 

You lean forward to encourage him. “Come on. You can tell me anything.” 

 Madara’s eyes grow hesitant. His thumb grazes over your skin, and the action makes you swallow your words. This makes you sad. Someone finally cares about you and you are going to leave them behind. 

“Madara,” you whine. 

 “What will you do when you get back?” Madara asks tentatively. 

You stare at your friend, trying to think. You did not think about this ahead. “I do not know.” 

 “Will you still pursue a career of being a shinobi?” 

“Of course,” you tell him. “It is my life.” 

 Madara nods, and he looks to the side. “Will you be happy, if you do?” 

Your eyes swim for a moment. “Madara, what is going on?” 

Madara retracts his hand and buries it underneath the table. “Nothing.”

 “Madara?” You call for him. “Thank you for everything you’ve done.” 

Madara nods, and a small smile softens his cold features. “Don’t die. I will not forgive you, if you do.” 

 You smirk, and you slowly stand up. “That’s a given.” 

You head towards the exit of his room. You hesitate to slide it open, your fingers resting at the handle. 

“I do not have any plans. I do not have a dream either,” you start to say. “But I want to figure it out. See where I stand in the grand scheme of things.”

You move your arm to slide the door open. 

 “That is not an easy path to take,” Madara warns, moving his hand to take his cup. 

 “When did I ever want easy?” You give him a huge grin, one full of bravado. If you are being honest, you are afraid of going out there once again, but this is the way forward. 

Pride is the last thing you see from Madara’s eyes before you close his door. 

//

You do not see Tobirama until the day you have to be on the Academy grounds, where the ceremony to announce its new curriculum and reformation is going to happen. You stay by the sidelines, your eyes tracking him as he moves about. His face and his demeanor is calm, but there is an air of frenzy surrounding him, as if his skin is itching but he cannot scratch it to ease his discomfort. The sun travels high across the sky, and the expression on Tobirama’s face becomes worse. His eyes start to squint, giving an impression that he is glaring at just about anything he sees, and the lines of his face start to form a scowl. 

 People start to gather in front of the Academy, children, parents, and people visiting from outside of Konoha. You stick to the shadows, carefully watching your back just in case another person tries to pull a knife on you again. 

 That is the only reason you want to get out there again–to offer help to anyone who is desperate to go after you, and to stop the bounty on your head. You know that you must come back to where it all began. Instead of hurting others, you want to use your skills to save because you think you can do it. Hashirama and Madara believe you can do it. 

 You wait for a little bit more, and finally, Hashirama and Tobirama take to the stage that was quickly built this morning. Hashirama says a few good words after retelling the brief beginnings of Konoha and the alliances between the clans that reside in it, and then, he steps aside to let his brother speak. 

 Tobirama glares at the crowd. You watch him with amusement. 

“My brother has a vision of what the Academy can be,” Tobirama begins. “It is not only a place to train young shinobis, but it is also a place to foster an environment where they can excel in many areas such as the sciences and the arts. I proudly announce that I have reformed the Academy to be exactly that…”

You frown. 

 Tobirama finishes his speech and goes on to summarize the curriculum by reading the titles and its author . There is no mention of your name anywhere. Not even a slight reference to you. 

 Something hot washes over you, and it makes your head dizzy. 

 When Tobirama steps off the stage, he nods at everyone and his brother and welcomes the people to explore the Academy. 

 You fight through the crowd to get to him, but he gets farther and farther away. 

You see Hashirama clutching a copy of the curriculum in one arm as he entertains a few children. 

 You wait for an opening, and you fake your smile as you greet Hashirama and ask to see the book. 

 You stare at the first page where Tobirama’s name is printed. Your head becomes empty. 

Suddenly, you push the book back into Hashirama and you bound after Tobirama with a boiling determination to bury your fist into his face. You try not to shout his name in the crowd, and instead, you run to him and you violently push him into another direction.

"I can't believe you!" You almost shout, once the two of you step into the empty classroom.

 Tobirama's hard expression does not change. 

You have never felt rage like this. You have been angry to the point that it gives you enough power to destroy things, but this rage is different. You only see fire, and it makes your heart burn and your face hot. Most of all, it makes tears prick your eye, making your vision blurry. All you can do is yell out because this one really stings. 

 “Are you not going to say anything?” You bark. “Say something or I am going to take my katana and fucking stick it up your arrogant, senile ass!” 

 Tobirama seems to take his time to make up his mind. You are too angry to see the conflict crossing on his face and the more he stays silent, the more you want to rage on. How can he just do this? 

 “Why aren’t you saying something?” You scream, the question tearing at your throat. Your head is spinning. You have never felt like this before. 

You feel...betrayed. 

 Your heart shatters before you can grab the pieces to salvage them.

Tobirama’s eyes are rippling with unsaid words, but they settle and they grow indifferent. “You are a criminal. I could not have your name publicized and connected to the Academy.” 

You gape at Tobirama, realization dawning on you. His suspicions, his need to keep track of you and your movements, his invasive questions to you, his constant monitoring of your abilities and what you can’t do. 

 It is all too much. 

 “After I tell you something so personal to me,” you grit your teeth and clench your fists to keep yourself from throwing him on the ground. “You use it against me in a very prejudiced way?”

 You go to a desk, and with sheer strength, you flip it over and it crashes to the floor, knocking back a few chairs. 

 Tobirama keeps silent and his expression remains stoic. His jaw tightens, and he is also clenching his fists to the point that they are shaking. 

“What is going on here?!” Hashirama interrupts, barging in through the classroom doors. 

 You try not to glare at the Hokage so you keep your eyes to the ground. 

“Nothing,” Tobirama grinds out. 

 “Your brother,” you slowly start. “Accidentally left my name out on this project you assigned to us, in which we equally worked on.” 

Hashirama’s head snaps to Tobirama, disbelief written all over his face. “Is that why you wouldn’t show me the whole thing in the beginning?" He asks his brother. 

 “You’re only in this for the money,” Tobirama says through gritted teeth, but it sounds like he is trying to convince himself. He does not even look at you when he says this. 

Your mouth drops in shock. “How dare you?!” You have never been so outrightly insulted. 

 “Tobirama, that is enough!” Hashirama interrupts. 

 “What is it to you anyway?” Tobirama demands, his face growing even more emotionless. “You’re just loud, but there really isn’t anything to you. You’re just an empty can, clanking around, making noises to get attention.” 

 Hashirama looks shocked at his brother’s words, and his eyes flit to you with concern immediately. “Tobirama!” Hashirama scolds, wanting to knock sense into his head. 

You stare at Tobirama, and then you turn away when you feel a hot tear slide down your cheek. “Wow,” you laugh to yourself. “To my naivety I thought you couldn’t get worse. On top of being a jerk, you are also quite egoistic, forget it.”

You quickly wipe the tear away, wondering why you cannot depend on your usual facade to hide your hurt away. You take a few deep breaths, and then you turn to Tobirama. 

 “Get fucked, you bastard,” you snarl, and with that, you walk away from him. “I’m glad this is the last time I’ll get to see your shitty face.” 

//

Tobirama stares at the space you just left, and he feels bereft of any feeling except regret. He tries to push it away but it weighs down on him to the point that he is bracing himself on a desk. He is an expert at controlling his emotions and yet, he cannot control the guilt that is taking over him. He feels shame over his own words and he immediately wants to chase you down and take it all back, but he plants his feet and he stares at the surface of the table he is leaning on. 

“What did you do?” Hashirama quietly asks, staring at the back of his brother’s head. 

 “Leave me alone,” Tobirama says. 

“Tobirama,” Hashirama calls his name, trying to make him talk. 

 “I said, leave me alone!” Tobirama slams his palms on the table. 

“Tobirama, you are acting like a child,” Hashirama scolds, the warmth from his voice undetectable. “I suggest you get it together.” 

 “Or else?” Tobirama retorts, feeling risky today. His brother can be scary when he is angry, and he deserves to receive his brother’s wrath. 

Hashirama grabs his arm harshly, forcing his brother to look at him. “Why did you do that?” 

Tobirama grits his teeth and he does not look his brother in the eye. 

 “Don’t make me repeat myself.” 

Tobirama takes his arm away and he starts to pace in the classroom. “Do you really want to know why?” 

 “Yes. Why?” 

 “Because if her name gets out in public and it is associated with mine, not only will that put a target on her back, she will also get my enemies on top of hers!” Tobirama shouts, his voice almost cracking from his outburst. 

Hashirama stares at his brother, processing what he just said. “What?” He breathes out. “It’s not because you know about her past or you're being your judgemental self?” 

 “No! I don’t care about that! How could you make her work with me?” Tobirama grows quiet, and he takes his hand and covers his forehead with his palm. “How could you just dump that on me...just how?!” He suddenly bursts out. "She is unbearable!"

Hashirama suddenly understands where his brother is coming from. “You should have just talked to her.” 

 Tobirama glances at the door. “Yeah, well. You could have warned me, elder brother.” 

 “Then would you have worked with her in the first place?” Hashirama asks. 

 “No,” Tobirama scowls. 

 Hashirama raises an eyebrow. “Exactly.” 

Tobirama falls silent, and his forehead creases. 

 “And I am also her Hokage. I can’t be giving out her secrets without her permission,” Hashirama adds, his voice gentle this time. “You should have told her because she is going away for a mission today.” 

Tobirama’s head snaps at this and he bounds for the door immediately, but his brother stops him. 

 “Leave her be and give her space,” Hashirama advises. “She will be back.” 

 Tobirama shakes his head, but he does not want to impose on you anymore. He leans back into the edge of a table and he folds his arms together. 

 “She is not who you think she is,” Hashirama tells Tobirama. 

 “I know,” Tobirama quietly says, staring at one spot on the floor. 

 “Tobirama, you are one hell of a fool,” Hashirama continues to scold. 

Tobirama glances up at his brother. and he grits his teeth “Stop it, elder brother, I am aware of what I did.” 

He continues to glare daggers on the spot on the floor, and although he is trying to push his guilt away like he is used to doing, it does not abate and it hangs over his head like a kind of condemnation. 

 He really drove you away, and so easily. 

//

“Took you long enough,” the woman with the brown eyes–Hina, you remember from the day she attempted to stab you–says, peeling herself away from the shadows of the trees. “We have a deadline to meet.” 

 “I had some men problems,” you roll your eyes and you keep walking. “Let’s go.” 

 “I’m surprised you even want to tag along, you had a good life in there,” Hina says, matching your quick strides. “And why don’t you just kill him? It’d save you time.”

 “How many times do I have to repeat that–”

 “Yeah, yeah, you don’t do that anymore,” Hina finishes and she gives you an unimpressed look. “Why did you even stop? I don’t understand.”

“I changed my mind, that’s it,” you lie. 

 “You felt guilty,” Hina surmises. “You never come back from killing, you know.” 

 You raise a shoulder to shrug, too angry to elaborate or to come up with a smart comeback. “Sure.” 

Hina unsheathes her knife and she flips it over in her hand. “Don’t give me that.” 

 “Why? I don’t even know you. You tried to kill me, remember?” 

 “Yeah, but now, we are working together.”

You sigh. You are tired of teamwork. It has not served you in any way that benefits you. 

 “I promise I won’t kill you,” Hina says, and she uncovers her hood from her head. Reddish brown hair falls down her shoulders and strands fall over her eyes. “Your turn to promise the same thing.”

You roll your eyes. “I promise,” you obnoxiously exclaim, not really meaning it. “Now, shut up and let’s go.” 

 You keep your eyes forward, using this newfound anger in you to not spare the village another glance.

//

Two years later…

Tobirama’s nephews push him to take them to the new meat restaurant that just recently opened up. He sighs, but he gives in since he got off work early and they came all the way to fetch him anyway. He watches them fondly as they fight and jostle each other as they walk, and he lets his mind wander about his latest research and the new jutsus that he just came up with. His brother did not approve of some, forcing him to seal them away and storing them in a more secured place. This is becoming a pattern between the two of them, and at times, Tobirama thinks that every jutsu he comes up with is dangerous to his brother. 

 He cannot blame him, though. Tobirama has been obsessing over his experiments more than usual because there are no more fights to go to. He has made a habit of picking up his pen over his sword. 

 He has kept himself busy, especially now that other Hidden villages are trying to model right after them. His brother sends him to many diplomatic missions to make allies, establish trade and commerce with nearby lands to make sure that Konoha is flourishing and growing. He also participates more in political games to gain resources and to learn of the newest technology. On top of his duties of being the Hokage’s advisor, he is also a teacher and he makes sure that his students are progressing in their careers as shinobi by taking them to espionage missions or bringing them to other lands to protect people and help out wherever they can. 

 He pushes them, and in turn, he also pushes himself to evolve more. He has a routine that he prides himself on following when he is well enough, but he breaks them occasionally when he is rendered inaccessible due to his bouts of manic passion, where he gets all of his work and thinking done all by himself. Hashirama warns him about self-preservation and reminds him of his many self-inflicted accidents, but Tobirama is not one to worry about himself when he is so close to accomplishing a new feat. 

 He is unstoppable when he is in his element.  

And in his most vulnerable moments, when he feels like the weight of his responsibilities are too much (something he will never ever admit because he is a very proud man who loves what he does), his mind goes to you without his consent. He tries not to think about you at all, but his inhibitions fail him in the worst of times and his worries for you escape his most guarded parts of his mind and to the forefront of his thinking. He does not have feelings of contempt over the fact that this is how he is now, but you are gone. There is no point of fighting himself over feelings that will fade in time. Tobirama hopes they do fade in time. 

 He has more important matters to attend to. He has lives to look after and take care of. He cannot afford to entertain his sorry feelings. 

 He is also a shinobi. He trained all his life to set aside personal afflictions for the sake of the bigger picture. He cannot fail himself and his ways. 

 He has all the time to keep convincing himself that this is how it should be for him. 

His many nephews push open the door to the new restaurant, and Tobirama follows after them, warning them to calm down. 

 Sometimes, having their father’s exuberance has its disadvantages. 

 Tobirama naturally looks around the restaurant, observing the decorations: the traditional paintings of landscapes hanging on the wall and the small, makeshift fountain in the corner, where tiny fishes are swimming, the way the tables and booths are arranged. Then, his heart stops when his gaze lands on the familiar shape of your head. You are seated by the counter, quietly munching on your meal like you have not eaten in days. Your weapons lie on the next chair beside you, and there is a knapsack by your feet. 

 Tobirama cannot help but marvel at you, and he thinks that he is seeing a ghost because you have been gone for so long. He never thought that he would see you again. 

 Even in his fair share of travels, he attempts to look for you, and each time, he comes up with nothing and he is nowhere near where you are. He knows his thoughts are becoming more absurd by the moment, but he cannot help but stare at you. He notices that your skin is darker, probably from long exposure from the sun, and there are new healed scars on your arms that he never saw before, but most of all, you are alive. 

 He has spent so many months wondering if you are safe, that seeing you here is a relief, like a breath that he has been holding so damn long. Tobirama does not know what to say. He couldn’t just go there and sit himself near you and start a conversation, not after what he pulled. 

 He deserves your silence. He deserves nothing from you. 

 What would he even say in the first place? 

 That when he no longer hears your vindictive laugh coming after him, when your loud presence and your insulting demeanor are no longer terrorizing him, he has the urge to seek you out. 

 That despite the fact that he should no longer be thinking of you and what he did to you, he still does, and he does it obsessively, as if taking apart that moment can piece him another result that will not end in you leaving. 

Tobirama feels sick as he slides into the booth with his nephews. He is glad that the booth hides him from view, but if he really tries to turn his body, he can easily spot you. 

 Someone comes to serve them, and Tobirama waits for his turn as his nephews shout their orders out.

//

Arriving just a few hours ago, you hear about a new restaurant that has opened in Konoha. You take your time to get there, observing the new things that are happening in the village. The place has changed a lot in two years, and it seems like the place has also grown in population. You try not to wonder about one of the people leading this village who definitely had a big role in encouraging Konoha to grow this strong, but your mind fails you because the Senju clan’s influence is tangible in the air. The people clearly worship their Hokage, because you hear songs in the streets dedicated to Hashirama and poems being recited to tell his feats in battle and in building this village. Naturally, word outside the village travels fast when it comes to the formidable Senju brothers. 

 You hear that Tobirama has grown into a bigger role of politicking, and you speculate that he prefers to work in the background and have his brother in the spotlight because you do not hear songs or poems about him, or see colorful painted portraits of him being sold in the markets of Konoha. 

 Again, you try not to think about him, but his absence in the corners of the streets you pass by just pushes your mind to fill in the gaps with him. 

 Time away from Tobirama did not foster your distaste for him. Instead, you are filled with questions. You want to understand where he is coming from. You want to understand his intentions. You have always known based on your instincts and expertise of reading people that he is the type to lay his life down for this village and his elder brother, that his heart is dedicated to a cause bigger than him. You know deep in your heart, he is a good man, so you want him to talk and explain why he decided to exclude your name from the credit of participating in creating the Academy’s curriculum. 

 Despite his harsh words, he did only speak of the truth. It made sense, though it does not excuse the fact that he hurt you and actively chose to do that. 

 He should have talked. 

 You are disappointed in him, because you know that he can do better. You have seen him be better than that. 

 Your only regret is that you have let your anger blind you for the first time. You are usually pretty good at keeping your cool, but suddenly, when it comes to Tobirama, your feelings become heightened for no damn reason. It’s like his face triggers you and your mouth fires off to immediately insult him and make him see and hear you. 

 You arrive at the new restaurant, and your mouth waters at the sweet and savory smell of meat cooking. It has been a while since you had a good, hearty meal and that is what you will have, before you meet with the Hokage and catch up with Madara. 

 You keep still in your seat as you wait, trying your best to not walk around and touch everything in the restaurant because it is pretty neat. A group of loud boys enter the restaurant, and you chuckle to yourself, remembering Hashirama’s cute sons, but then your food arrives and you quickly take your utensil to eat. You have been so hungry that it does not matter how others perceive you right now. 

“The bill, please,” you request once you are finished eating. 

 The waiter hands refills your glass of water. “Your bill has been paid.” 

 “What?” You say in surprise, completely puzzled. “When?”

 You clearly did not pay your bill before you ate. 

“Just a few moments ago,” the waiter replies and he leaves you to your thoughts. 

You stare at your filled glass, thinking that you got lucky today and that the restaurant is probably doing this to garner more customers. 

 You admit to yourself that what they are doing is a good strategy. 

You shrug to yourself and gather your things so that you can meet Hashirama. You have been dying to catch up with him, and most of all, you are hoping to get a glimpse of Tobirama. 

 The anger you felt towards him is gone, and it replaces with an uncomfortable feeling on your chest. 

 You ignore it, lest it blossoms into something you cannot control. 

//

Hashirama greets you with open arms, and he goes to you like an eager child and you are immediately pulled into a huge embrace. You let out a surprised laugh, and Hashirama steps back to examine you. A huge grin spreads across his features and you cannot help reflecting back his sentiments. 

“I’m here!” You exclaim. 

 “Two years, my gods,” Hashirama cries out, his hands settling on your shoulders. “You could have sent a letter.” 

 You shrug apologetically. “I’m sorry.”

“No matter, no matter!” Hashirama walks back to his desk. “So? Tell me all about it.” 

You take a deep breath, trying to find the courage to retell what happened to you for the last two years. Different events flash into your mind, but you decide to start from the very beginning. Hashirama nods expectantly, encouraging you.

You leave with Hina, the woman who was sent to kill you. The two of you take the job that Nuga speaks of, which is to assassinate the leader of a growing gang towards the eastern lands, near the ocean. You had offered to help Hina so that she could make it back to her family, and then go on your way from there to offer your skills to help people. However, it did not go as planned. 

  The gang has controlled the growing ports near the ocean, signifying their growing power. As the two of you infiltrate the living quarters of the leader, swarms of his subordinates flood the hallways and the two of you become surrounded. With no way to go and no hope of accomplishing this job, you and Hina decide to fight your way out. 

  And in the heat of the battle, Hina gets injured. 

  You wade through countless bodies, one arm defending the two of you and the other half-carrying Hina. Blood sprays in the air, and your vision is painted red, but you keep going. You have no choice if you want to live. You try not to aim at the most vulnerable spots, and instead, you aim low at their legs or choose to slam the flat of your blade against their heads and swoop them off their feet. You are not free of injuries either, as you feel the debilitating stings of the blade slicing against your arm and your side. 

  “I’m sorry,” Hina whispers as the two of you leave a wake of injured men behind you. 

  You trudge ahead, not wasting time to put a huge distance between you and the gang of men. 

“Hina,” you tell her. “You better not die on me.” 

  Hina murmurs your name with a smile. “To fight with you is an honor, Y/n.” 

  You glance at the woman leaning heavily on your shoulder. Half of her body is completely soaked in blood. “Don’t say that. What happened to referring to me as the Man-Killer?” 

  “My family lives in the forest at the very south of the Earth country,” Hina says, her voice becoming weaker and weaker. “Please protect them and help them get through the winter.” 

  “Hina,” you say. “Don’t tell me this.” 

  “You’re just human, you know. You don’t deserve every bad thing out there.”

  “Hina,” you plead. “Shut up.” 

  “Sorry for your arm…” Hina murmurs.

The buzz of energy you feel that makes your blood pump leaves you, making you feel sluggish. Hina is now leaning her weight on you fully, and you know that the two of you cannot travel far like this, so you settle her down against a tree and you check her injuries. 

  Blood covers your hands like a pair of gloves, but you do not shrink away in fear or disgust. You do your best to take care of Hina, refusing to look her in the face. The moonlight shines between the spaces of the trees, illuminating her pale skin and her blood-soaked clothes. 

“Hina,” you whisper fearfully. 

  You do not get another response. 

You fall to your ass on the ground, feeling defeated. You rest your elbows on your knees, and you stare at Hina, feeling empty. After a minute, you make yourself reach for Hina’s hand, and you hold it, until the warmth from her body fades away. You let her know, as she leaves her body, that you are there for her and that she was not alone. 

  Then, before the sun rises, you do your best to clean her up, wiping away the blood from her face and arms, and you cover her with your own garment. You make her a grave, even though your body is tired and in pain. 

  When morning comes, you have her knife strapped with your swords, and you head towards the direction of her home. 

--

The trip takes almost two months, and in those months, you practice travelling through trees using your chakra to propel yourself from one branch to the next. You get tired, and you require long rests, but towards the end, you feel yourself getting stronger and more aware of your power. You pass many towns, luscious forests and dry deserts until you are in another country, taking extra care to watch your back. 

  It takes another two weeks until you find Hina’s family, and you find them in the old Hina fashion, with one of her siblings sticking a knife on your back. You disarm her younger brother easily enough, but the youngest sibling is on a tree branch above you, aiming an arrow to your head. 

“I come in peace,” you announce, immediately raising your hands and dropping the boy’s knife. “Hina sent me.”

  “Where is our sister?” 

  “I have her knife. She died from a job,” you tell them. 

  The girl glares at you. “Did the famed ningen satsujin-sha get her?”

You swallow nervously. “No.” The guilt swallows you, even though your hand did not strike her down.

  “Are you her friend?” 

  You try to think if the short time you spend with Hina can be called friendship. “No.” You decide.

The girl fires her arrow, and you quickly dodge it. You glance back to see where the arrow hits and you narrow your eyes. If you were a little slower, she could have gotten your eye. 

“Good shot,” you compliment. “Your sister told me to help you for the coming winter. You do not need to trust me, but I can help you. Her last words were focused on you.” 

  The girl eyes you suspiciously, and despite the grim situation, you break out into an uneasy grin. The shape of her face reminds you of Hina. 

“I promise I’ll get out of your hair soon enough. I just want to make good on my promise to Hina. I am of your service for as long as you see fit.” 

--

You end up staying with them for a year and a half. You help Hina’s family with hunting and house repairs. When the hunting is fruitful, you help the kids barter for money and other goods through skinned fur and meat that will help them prepare for the seasons. You also teach the kids how to fight, just in case they need to defend themselves. You help chop down firewood and you also fashion two bokkens for Hina’s siblings, and you promise to teach them swordfighting during the summer.

  Through Hina’s family, you learn a thing or two about forgiveness and compassion. 

  Hina’s parents hated you the moment they saw you. They blame you for their daughter’s death. Harsh words usually bounce off of you and in fact, you feed on harsh words because you have an arsenal of your own. Though this time, you choose to ignore their harsh words and practice your tact. Though there are other places you could be, you choose to plant your feet and follow Hina's dying wishes, and that means ensuring that they can live through the fast-approaching winter. 

When the harsh winter passes, Hina’s mother gives you a scarf and serves you a bowl of hot soup. Hina’s father offers you their couch to crash on and asks if you could stay with them a bit longer, and look out for their kids. 

  You could be in other places to pursue your own salvation, but instead, you choose Hina’s family to make it right with. 

  After the next winter and spring, you leave them, and you head towards Konoha, towards home. 

  You were not able to erase the bounty over your head, but helping Hina’s family, that finally felt like atonement. It finally felt like your actions are starting to mean more than just fighting and looking out for your own life. 

  You did not get all the answers you are looking for, but for now, you feel like you are finally on the right track. 

You take a deep breath, and look the Hokage in his eyes. It is completely nightfall, and Hashirama has lit a few candles to make the room brighter. You observe his misty eyes and you chuckle to yourself, because despite your absence, nothing has changed. 

 “I’m sorry for what you’ve gone through,” Hashirama begins, but he does not say anything more, letting a pregnant silence dawn between the two of you. 

“You do not have to worry about the bounty over your head,” Hashirama finally says as he settles on his chair again. 

 Your gaze snaps to Hashirama’s face, on full alert. 

“How come?” 

 Hashirama smiles, and he looks giddy. “My brother pleaded for your case and did some negotiations while you were gone. It is erased. You are free.”

Your jaw drops open in shock. “What?” 

 Hashirama smiles softly. “You know he feels really bad for what he did to you.” 

 “I knew it,” you whisper in disbelief. 

Hashirama sighs and he taps his chin. “I know you might hate him, and I am not excusing what he did! He is wrong for that. He is so wrong.”

 You chuckle and you let out an exasperated sigh. 

 “My brother and I have countless enemies,” Hashirama explains and he meets your eyes seriously. “You have your own burden to carry and he did not want to add any more by associating your name with his. He wants you to be free and not be tied down by the village to do what you need to do.” 

 The urge to look for Tobirama and punch him grows stronger. You have forgiven him long ago, but Tobirama seems to have forgotten that communication exists. If he just told you this in the first place, then you wouldn’t have spent the last two years cursing his name in your mind and making you think that he is a horrible person. 

“Well, I do hope that you catch him soon so that the two of you can talk,” Hashirama emphasizes the last word. “Knowing my brother, it will take years for him to admit anything true to himself, but he is kind, I can promise you that.” 

You let out a laugh, and warmth spreads across your chest. You shake your head with disbelief, and the excitement you feel makes you want to run through the streets of Konoha in joy. 

“I will let him know that you are back,” Hashirama promises. He smiles fondly at you. “And Madara has been waiting for your return.”

 The mention of your friend makes you start for the door. You can hardly wait to see Madara again. It has been too long. You think you may start crying just thinking of him. 

“Lord Hashirama, thank you,” you tell the Hokage sincerely, with all of your heart. 

You mean it, and with the bounty lifted and your heart set on the right path, you feel like you have taken a breath of fresh air. You can finally make your new start here, in Konohagakure.

 You are free. 

.

.

.

The due dates that Tobirama gave you are more reasonable and flexible than you thought. You try to find something to complain about so you can relay it to Madara later and earn a small smile from him, but no, there is no reason to complain about it. The only thing you want to complain about are his so-called rules. Tobirama is not about leisure or lightening up, though that is not a bother to you if you are going to be honest. Planning to mess with him a little is just an attempt to wipe off that serious face of his. You want to know him based on what you see from him, not from what other people have told you.

However, you also do not want to mess things up. You are determined to work as hard as he does for this project because it is special to the village and for the children that are going to be attending the Academy. 

Also because you know you’ll get paid for it. You have been running low on money these days ever since you bought your own place. 

 Now that you are older, you wish you had the proper education to be a shinobi. You have to learn most of your skills along the way and apart from your family who had basically banished you, and even now, you are still learning as there are a lot of things that you missed. 

 Now, the children that are going to grow up here have something better for the future. They have more choices and bigger chances to become good shinobis. 

You get settled in your bed, which is literally the only furniture your place has. It is your dining table, your workplace, and also your resting place. Your weapons are littered on the floor, and your swords are leaning against the wall in one corner of the room. The books and the scrolls given to you lay open or stacked near your bed where you can reach for it. Some clean laundry you have yet to get to sit on the foot of your bed, and the space you are currently lying on is the only space your bed can make for you at the moment. 

 Quaint, but it has a lot of potential. 

Your new home, which is situated just at the edge of the village and newly built, is a home for civilians and also other shinobis who are not part of a clan, or those who rather have a place for themselves. This is a sign that the village is growing, and more and more families are becoming involved with it. 

You force yourself to go through the many materials that you need to read and study up on for the rest of the night until midnight, and you begin to write your suggestions after going through the material once again. You are good at absorbing information, but at the same time, you have trouble keeping still for a very long time. Sometimes you have the unfortunate ability to memorize the wrong things because your mind zeroes into whatever your brain wants to obsess over. 

 However, you have made it this far. You can adjust. 

You hope. 

//

You are pretty sure that Tobirama is sending you around the village in a goose chase just so that he can work on the curriculum himself. It’s obvious he did not want you near him with all those rules about preserving his boundaries. The said goose chase sounds reasonable enough–talk to the members of the clans, the ones who are the keeper of their knowledge and history and write them down. He did not even look you in the face when he sent you away, he just gave you a list of what to ask the clans residing in Konoha and a blank notebook and a scroll for you to record all of the information in. 

 This whole ordeal occupied you for the whole day and it also happens to bleed through the next day, in which you are convinced Tobirama has completed at least half the work. 

The thought does not make you happy. You want to do something, damn it. You feel like your life depends on it. 

Another day passes, and this time, Tobirama has you looking for artists, merchants, inventors and other skilled people in Konoha and recording their name and the location to find them. This part you understand well because you know that Hashirama wants to expand on other skills, but it feels so tedious and it makes the day longer. Not to mention, you do not really know anyone since you have been busy polishing your skills with Madara. Now that you think about it, you spend an awful lot of time with the man, ever since you came here. 

 Before you know it, you are breaking into a run towards the Hokage mansion. 

 Tobirama cannot be left to his own devices. You will not let him take this from you. 

You find the white-haired man seated on his usual spot, hand poised elegantly over a sheet of paper and eyes moving along the lines of a book he is reading. 

“Finished already?” Tobirama says in a very flat tone. 

 “Yeah, of course, I already know the people to put down.” Okay, that was a lie, and you know Tobirama had caught that because he glances at you briefly with narrowed eyes. 

You walk up to him and you lay out the information you gathered today. 

“Where’s your family from?” Tobirama straight up asks you without any preamble. The expression on his face does not change though you can feel that he is bothered by you. 

 You are taken aback by a beat, but you have no problem answering it. You have memorized the lines that you have to say that it begins to feel true. “They are a little far north from here, but they’re just traders, merchants, skillsmen.” 

 “Of what?” 

 “With the right amount of money, anything.” You say in an even, but casual tone. “They don’t like shinobi, so I left to make a living of my own.”

You can tell Tobirama did not like your answer. He puts his pen down and you feel him scrutinizing you. 

 "You have any friends?" He immediately follows up. 

 However, you have long mastered the skills of deflecting and only letting people know certain things about you. They always see what they want to see in you, never bothering to put two and two together that you are just painting a pretty picture for them to look at. 

 "Too many," you reply vaguely. 

 Tobirama sighs, and his eyes narrow. 

“I cannot trust you if you continue to evade me. This is integral to this village and its future, and I cannot have, no, I cannot afford to waste time or make mistakes,” Tobirama says and he meets your eyes. 

“I can promise you, I am ready to work just as much as you so let's not get personal,” you lean back and cross your arms. “And after this, I will get out of your hair forever. You wouldn’t even have to hear from me.” 

 Tobirama rolls his eyes, but you can tell he is satisfied with your answer. “Oh please, with a village this small, and me, holding an important position in the said village, you cannot guarantee that.” 

 You smirk and you pull out the chair across from him. “Touché, Lord Tobirama,” you emphasize the lord with a mocking tone. 

Tobirama grits his jaw visibly and he grabs his pen almost angrily. You are starting to think that maybe this is what Tobirama generally looks like. 

 “Get to work.” 

 “What is it this time? List the several types of drinks the people in this village make? Investigate the best type of fabric to wear for each season?” You prompt, unable to keep the grin from spreading across your lips. He just let you get away with calling him lord. 

 Adding a title to someone’s name is supposed to be a sign of respect, but the way you say it makes it sound derogatory. Like you’re cursing him. 

Tobirama looks about ready to yell, and part of you wants him to take the bait. You lean closer to gauge his reactions and you watch him immediately school his expression. It is like watching a magic show, one moment something is there, the next, it disappears. 

“Well, if you wanted me to make up more tasks for you to do, you should have just asked,” Tobirama deadpans. 

You watch him, intrigued. “Wow. Are you trying to be funny, or are you trying to insult me?” 

 “Please stop talking when I am working,” Tobirama does not sound like he is pleading. He hands you a stack of books to go through. “I want you to compile a list of necessary skills that you deem important, and I will do the same. We can discuss and vet on which skills are required to learn for each grade level right after.” 

You let out a breezy laugh, and you note how Tobirama seems to twitch at the sound. “Right, right, fine.” You pause. “Have you looked at my notes?”

“Of course I have,” Tobirama huffs and he shoots you a distasteful glare, and to you, it looks like he’s tired of talking. “I will make my own notes on where you’re lacking and then you revise it.” 

 “What do we need those for?” You ask, genuinely curious. “What else are we in charge of making?” 

“The reason I had you seek out artists, writers, bookmakers, and the like, is because we will commission them to make textbooks,” Tobirama explains. “We just need to get the information together. Meanwhile, I would also like to fill this library and another public library with other kinds of books.” 

You tap your chin. “Your brother tells me you like to invent things and all that. Are you going to include your research and your inventions in the library?” 

 Tobirama sighs, visibly withering at the statement that his brother talks behind his back, but he revives himself enough to get back to his work. “Depends on what my brother approves of.” 

You let out an involuntary chuckle. Here are the two most powerful known shinobis in the world right now, and they argue over mundane things. 

 Tobirama raises an eyebrow at you and you shake your head. 

He takes that as a sign to keep on working, so you decide to keep to yourself. 

 Surprisingly, you are starting to enjoy this. It’s not as bad as you imagined. 

//

Perhaps you spoke too soon, because here you are at the crack of dawn–no not even the crack of dawn because the surroundings are still dark blue. You yawn as you arrive, and find Tobirama waiting in the middle of the training ground in a different outfit you have not seen him in. He seems to only have one color palette; he wears a navy wrap-around jacket that has a collar in a lighter shade of blue. The sleeves are short, showing off his muscles, and all of this is tied with a light yellow-green belt around his waist. A sword is secured to his belt, and it hangs on his side ready to be drawn. A happuri guards his forehead and the sides of his face, and for some reason, this makes him look more authoritarian and older. A mesh armor peeks through the space between his collars and even in your sleepiness, you note a defined torso that you keep to yourself. 

You do not even see an ounce of sleepiness in him and you huff.  

 Tobirama merely glances at you, but every time he looks at you, it feels like he is already exasperated. 

 “Is it just us?” You try not to sound too whiny. “Also I ate breakfast, I’m not falling for whatever it is you have in mind.” 

 “And what do you think is on my mind?” 

 “I don’t know? A test of survival, starving us for days in the forest with only the surroundings as our resource?” You rest a hand on your two swords–an uchigatana and a wakizashi, both the same in appearance and made from the same metal. 

“I said not to eat too much breakfast, I did not discourage you from it.” Tobirama lets out a sarcastic sigh–something he can really pull off well. “I am not that cruel.” 

 You hear an excited gasp behind you and you turn to find Sarutobi Hiruzen and Shimura Danzo walking towards the two of you. 

“Tobirama-sensei!” Hiruzen calls enthusiastically, at the crack of dawn. “I hope you don’t mind, I brought my friend again!” 

You glance at Tobirama and you see his face visibly soften at the sight of his student. 

“And I didn’t know Y/N-sensei’s joining us!” Hiruzen bounds up to you and you reach up to ruffle his hair. He turns to you and points at Tobirama. “He’s a really cool sensei! Really cool!” 

Tobirama suddenly looks constipated and you laugh out loud. 

 “We’ll see, kiddo,” you tell him. “We’ll see.” 

Two more kids come, and the girl, Utatane Koharu, somehow looks pissed, which you can suddenly relate to. The boy beside her, Mitokado Homura, looks more calm and composed as he adjusts his glasses on his face. 

Tobirama nods, and then he breaks off into a light jog. Obediently, the kids follow after him and you grudgingly follow behind them. They must be used to this. 

 After a few rounds, the kids start to stretch and you do the same as well, and everything has been pretty calm. You watch as the kids do sets of push-ups, sit-ups, calisthenics and you are impressed at their stamina. They’re barely twelve, but then again, if you are training under Senju Tobirama, you can tell that you will be pushed to your limit. 

You feel a pang of envy from these kids for a moment, but you push it away. There is no reason to look back into the past and feel bitter about how things worked out. 

“So what’s next, sensei?” Hiruzen inquires. You can see how much these kids admire the man. 

 “Sparring,” Tobirama replies. “Since Danzo’s here, you guys are evenly matched. Last man standing gets to fight me.” 

 “What about Y/N-sensei?” Danzo interjects. 

 “Yeah, what about me?” You smirk, and you lighten your voice so that it sounds more childish. 

You can feel Koharu rolling her eyes. 

You narrow your eyes at him and let out a small stream of breath through your mouth. “I see.” 

 Tobirama slightly raises his chin haughtily. It suits him. He does not need to speak to dominate the atmosphere. He shrugs, and it sparks something in you. 

 “I’ll still try my best,” you smirk, but underneath your facade, you are starting to get annoyed. Which is new, because you are generally a patient person. 

Tobirama takes Hiruzen and Koharu while you take the other two to coach during their matches. You stand in between Danzo and Homura, watching their small faces study each other. 

“Don’t kill each other,” you advise, and you start their match. 

 The two go at each other, with Danzo throwing the first punch. You back off a little to make sure that you can see their stances. 

 Homura whirls around and his foot juts out, with his heel aiming towards Danzo’s head. Danzo ducks down, and kicks at Homura’s stomach the moment he regains his posture from the kick. 

Homura staggers back, and now he is on the defensive, blocking Danzo’s hits and kicks, barely dodging them as he keeps backing away. You notice the hits and misses from each boy.

 “Homura, don’t back away!” You yell out. “Get closer to him!” 

Homura does as you say, and Danzo is unable to land a hit on him, limiting his movements unless–

 Danzo jumps back to get away, and kicks Homura on the chest. 

 “Nice!” You cheer. 

 “Sensei, whose side are you on?” Homura complains and his hand comes up to rub his chest. 

You laugh. “Neither!” You glance at both of their faces. “Okay, you two, come here.” 

 Danzo and Homura face each other again. 

 “Save your movements, don’t be so generous with them,” you tell them. “Don’t punch just to punch. Again!” 

The two boys come at each other and you stand back to watch them again. This time, you do not offer any more suggestions. You glance to where Tobirama is at, and he is squatting on the ground, his eyes trained on the students’ footwork. 

 You hear him call out that Hiruzen’s feet are too far apart. 

You snap back to the two boys just in time to watch Homura flip Danzo on his back. 

You walk over and you peer at Danzo. “You okay?” 

 “Yes,” the boy wheezes out. 

“Alright, you’re done,” you chuckle and you look at Homura. “You win, then. Good job. Help him up.” 

You glance at the other group, and you see Koharu sock Hiruzen straight to his face and Tobirama jump up to his feet. Hiruzen gets to his feet, and you see a trickle of blood coming out of his nose. 

When Hiruzen gets closer, you ruffle his hair affectionately and you laugh as he grimaces. 

 “Not funny!” He whines nasally. 

 “Keep your hands up next time!” You taunt even though he may already know this. 

Tobirama puts a hand on his shoulder and steers him towards a rock so that he can sit. “Sit up and lean forward,” he tells his student. 

 The rest of the kids walk towards him to watch and poke fun at Hiruzen. 

 You stay back and cross your arms to watch them. You know that there is no place for you to be there. 

 Once Tobirama is finished attending to his student, he turns to you. “Koharu, you’re the referee.” 

You size him up, your eyes travelling from his face and down to his waist. What was one of his rules again? 

 Anticipation builds in your core, and your hand rests on the scabbard of your sword, your thumb playing at the hilt. 

“Are we including tricks today?” You inquire. 

 “If you want,” Tobirama curtly replies. 

Koharu starts the fight, and Tobirama wastes no time coming at you. 

 His first hit is heavy, and you block it with both of your forearms and brace yourself by stepping back one leg. You are quick to grab his wrist as you twist your arm and you step forward, meaning to put your leg behind his, but he breaks away from you and disturbs the momentum that you were going to use against him. 

 You are quick to back away because he comes at you without stopping. 

 He is fast, and he is heavy with his hands. You notice his open hands, ready for grappling. His stance is lower, and you know that it will be hard to knock him off balance, and the effects of kicking at his head will go to his advantage. 

You need an opening. 

 You launch yourself at him, and as he prepares himself to grab you, you drop to your knees and slide in between his legs, hitting his knee as you pass him by. He turns to your direction, and you quickly use his bent knee to step and kick towards his head. He blocks you and you see him almost grab at your ankle.

 You do not give him a chance to gather himself, and you swing again at him, this time using his shoulder to propel yourself around him and using his weight and yours, you are able to lock his head with your legs. Just as you are about to go for another twist to bring him to the ground, Tobirama counters by catching you and launching you off of him. 

 “You fight like an assassin,” Tobirama says as you roll to the ground and to your feet. 

“Are you impressed?” You grin at him, half jokingly. 

 Tobirama does not answer you, but it looks like he is about to say something worse as he charges at you. 

You step closer to him so that he does not follow through his movement, and you grab the hilt of his sword and then you strike your palm at his chest to send him back. You whirl around to brandish his sword in the air. 

 What was one of his rules? You suddenly remember.

  Do not touch my things, unless I give them to you. 

For a moment, everyone freezes. 

You study the blade in your hand. 

 “This is a very nice sword,” you muse, and you strike at the air and flip it, testing the weight. You run a finger on the blunt edge of his sword. “Well-balanced and thin, but very sharp. Excellent for accurate and fast hits...and conducting lightning.”

Tobirama’s face grows stormy. His fists tighten. 

 You twist blade with a slight twist of your wrist, and you hand it with the hilt towards him. “Sorry. I was curious.” 

Tobirama takes his sword and quickly sheathes it. You note a minuscule change in his expression, but it quickly passes and you are disappointed for not being quick enough to note it. 

“So, is this a tie?” Koharu asks, uncertain. 

“Yes,” Tobirama grits through his teeth. 

You watch Tobirama’s tense shoulders and decide to leave him alone. You probably went too far today. 

“Well, that was fun, but I have to go,” you say, even though the rest of your day is pretty much free. "I have some friends to meet." 

 Tobirama suspects that you certainly do not have any friends to meet, but he does not say anything more. He’s probably eager to make you go. There is nothing he would want more. 

“Aw!” Hiruzen cries out. His nose bleed has stopped. “Thanks for coming by, sensei!” 

You wink at the kids, and you make your exit, your hand still remembering the feel of Tobirama’s sword. It is oddly familiar, and you wonder if the craftsmanship is similar to your own blade. 

You can feel Tobirama’s stare behind you and it burns the back of your neck as if he is shooting laser beams at you, and just when you glance back to regard it, he is turning away and conversing with his students about hand seals. 

Though it was just a joke and a way to catch him by surprise, you can’t help but feel that you just stomped over the thin olive branch that he was handing out to you. 

You note to yourself to make it up to him tomorrow. 

.

.

.

You wake up with a fog in your mind, but you think nothing of it as you pull yourself out of your bed. Your limbs are heavier than usual, and your stomach is screaming for a crumb of nutrient, but you power through, thinking nothing of this since tiredness and hunger are nothing new to you. 

 You freshen up and pull your hair away from your face, and put on clean clothes. After a moment of perusing your laundry, you make a mental note to do them soon. 

 You slip your feet into your sandals and grab your weapons in a hurry, not even sparing a glance at the parchment on the floor containing your house bills. You do not want to be late, especially when Tobirama told you in the beginning to always be early. Tobirama has told you to meet him at the market since he wanted to look for new weapons and to commission people into making ninja tools for Academy students to train with. You run outside, only stopping when you see Tobirama standing in front of your building with his back to you. You stare at him a little longer, not meaning to linger on the space on the back of his neck, or the muscles of his back moving in and out as he breathes. 

You slowly walk towards him, ignoring the way your heart falters and stops. 

“Took you long enough,” Tobirama greets you roughly. 

 You roll your eyes and bump your shoulder against his. “I thought we were meeting at the market.”

 Tobirama glances away, and you follow his gaze. You find nothing out of ordinary in the direction he is looking at. 

 “Are you hungry?” Tobirama asks suddenly. 

 “Huh?” 

 “Are you hungry?” Tobirama repeats, this time his tone is insistent.

 You stare at him in bewilderment. It’s not like he knew you skipped breakfast. “Y-yeah.” 

 “Let’s go,” Tobirama says, and he starts to speed walk down the street. 

You lightly jog after him, a chuckle bursting out of your lips. You do not know what has gotten into Tobirama today, but you admit that this is a new side to him that you have not seen yet. He is not being pissy, but rather, he seems to be holding out a light for you to get closer. He is more lenient with your antics. You try not to think too much about it, as it makes you feel weird and queasy in your stomach. 

 You reckon it’s the hunger. 

You walk beside him as he leads you to a small eat-in store, where they are selling fresh baked bread, porridges and drinks. Tobirama stands to the side as you peruse the menu outside the store, and when you have decided, the two of you slide into a table, with Tobirama sitting in front of you.

 A moment later, someone comes in to take your order, and when they leave, you frown at Tobirama.

“What?” Tobirama scowls. 

 “Why didn’t you order for yourself? Green tea is not breakfast.” 

 Tobirama looks uncomfortable as he loosens his shoulders. “I already ate. You, on the other hand…”

Your mind blanks, coming up with nothing. Not even a teasing remark. 

  This is surprising, you muse to yourself. 

You shrug, and Tobirama’s eyes narrow at you. 

“How is your training going?” Tobirama inquires in the tone you deem casual for him. 

 “I’m making small progress,” you tell him. You fold your hands and rest your chin over them. “Your notes really helped.”

 Tobirama nods. 

 For a moment, you thought that he was going to brag about it, but he did none of that. 

“I have some new books for you to go over,” Tobirama suddenly says, not even easing you to its idea. 

 “More books?” Your brain hurts at the thought of new material to consume. 

 Tobirama glances at you affably. “I think you’d like them.”  

Huh?! You exclaim to yourself. Since when did your interests matter to him? 

Thankfully, your food arrives quickly, and you do not waste time to shove them in your mouth because Tobirama does not get you to talk when you are eating. However, he is looking at you strangely and he looks almost horrified at the speed you are inhaling your food. 

“Slow down,” Tobirama warns. “No one’s going to take your food.” 

You cough and bits of food spray out of your mouth. You turn away from him to compose yourself, and when your chest is no longer spasming and you are able to swallow down a big chunk of food, you grab his tea cup without thinking and down the tea in it. 

 Tobirama is not sure whether he is astonished or disgusted. 

“Thanks,” you gasp. 

Tobirama nods, feeling half of his face grimace. “It’s fine,” he tries to convince himself. 

 He gestures at the person by the counter for the bill, and you are suddenly embarrassed that he is paying only for your food and not even for himself. 

“Wait, can’t I pay half?” You ask him, stopping his hand from putting the money on the small tray. 

Tobirama glances at your hand on top of his and he stiffens. “I got it.”

 “Tobirama…” You start, doubtful.

Tobirama raises an eyebrow. “Really? You choose now to have some shame?” 

You sigh, and you give him a playful smile. “Be careful what you do for me, Tobirama. If you’re being nice today, I will be taking advantage of that.” 

Tobirama knocks your hand off of his and he places the money down. “You’re the most ridiculous person I’ve ever met.”

You cackle. “The honor is mine.”

 “It’s not a compliment,” Tobirama immediately shoots back.

You let the moment pass, and then, you lean forward to gauge his reaction. “How’s the search for future partners going? Any special women or men you have your eye on?”

Tobirama suddenly looks indignant. “No.”

 “Aw, why not?” You think about it. “I mean, it shouldn’t be hard. Look at you, you’re so handsome.” 

Tobirama is not sure how to react, so he stares at you instead, forgetting to scowl or even frown. His words form in his mind, but they end up being scrambled as they reach his mouth. 

 “You don’t believe me?” You challenge him. 

 “What?!” Tobirama harshly snaps.

You call the person behind the counter and gesture for them to come closer. 

“Yes?” 

 Tobirama manages to gather himself to glare at you. “What are you doing?!” He hisses under his breath. 

“Tell me honestly,” you begin, trying to sound thoughtful, like this is the most important discovery. “Isn’t he handsome? Sexy, even?” 

 Tobirama feels like there is a cauldron underneath him and he is hanging over it to be boiled alive. 

The person glances at the two of you with shock. 

“Um…” They nervously glance at Tobirama, who is glaring daggers at you, his face red. 

You laugh, and you hand the money to them. “Sorry. That was uncalled for. Have a good day!”

The person bows to Tobirama, squeaking out my lord and they scuttle away from your table. 

You glance at Tobirama, noticing the coloring on his face almost matching the three stripes that frame his face perfectly. 

 “Are you angry?” You ask, taking note of the redness of his skin. “Or hot? It is summer.” 

Tobirama stands up abruptly and walks out, his fists clenching by his sides. 

 You chuckle to yourself, and you follow after him. 

“Come again, er…” The person calls out. “What is your name?” 

 You see Tobirama standing just a few feet away from the door. 

“Y/N.” You smirk. “Senju Y/N.” 

Tobirama feels his knees give up on him and he sways a little. 

//

While Tobirama walks straight ahead with purpose, you make a point of stopping by each stall to look at their items and try out free samples. While you mile around, Tobirama makes a point of slowing down to wait for you even though he does not stop for anything. You try to pull him towards a stand that sells little toys and trinkets, but he does not budge until you tell him that you found a drawing that looks similar to him. 

 Tobirama sighs and lets you grab his arm towards the paintings. A man sits on a stool underneath an umbrella, painting away. 

 “Where is this painting?” Tobirama grounds out, entertaining you instead of brushing you off. 

 “Here!” You point at a snowman overlooking a snowy mountain range. “Pale and cute.” 

 Tobirama scowls and he immediately marches away but you see that his eyes are warm, almost brown and you feel like you are staring at a hearth. You pull his arm back before he can make it far. 

“I’m kidding, that’s not it,” you tell him. “It’s this one!” 

 You gesture at a portrait of him, and Tobirama stares at it in wonder. It is him, yet in the painting, he looks older, his eyes wild and desperate, and his shoulders heavy with burden. Something in him aches and he turns away from it, feeling like the portrait is trying to speak to him.

 “What, too ugly for you?” You tease him, and you duck a little to meet his eyes. 

 “The nose looks a little big,” Tobirama replies vaguely and you roll your eyes. 

 “You’re popular!” 

 “I am popular enough,” Tobirama states and he starts to walk away. “Let’s go.” 

The morning sun is now reaching the center of the sky. The heat is starting to rise up, and it burns the back of your heads, but the two of you power through it and finally, you arrive at a school of blacksmiths. Tobirama enters in, and you follow him, the sight making you misty-eyed. The sound of metal clashing against metal, of the fire being started and water sizzling, it all hits close to home. 

“Lord Tobirama,” a smith greets him. When he turns to you, a flash of recognition lights his face. 

 You keep your face neutral, not knowing what the smith’s intention is. You go towards a table of freshly made blades to hide your face, letting Tobirama do what he needs to do here. 

Your eyes go to the kunais hanging on the wall, the length of their blades varying. You approach it and take the sheathed kunai and weigh it in your hands. The weight feels weird so you unsheath it, completely surprised that it falls apart to become two kunais, splitted in half. You put it back, and go back to the table of blades to run your finger on their surfaces. 

“Lovely, isn’t it?” The same smith from earlier approaches you. Tobirama is nowhere to be seen. 

 “Yes,” you answer. “Though I have seen better.” 

 “I bet you have,” he says and hands one of the blades to you. “I am Nuga.” 

You accept the blade with both hands and you behold it. In its reflection, you study Nuga, making mental notes on his body language and the way he is positioned, formulating a plan to escape him in case something goes wrong. 

 “What do you think?” Nuga inquires. “It is yet to be attached by its hilt, but it is one of our best works so far.” 

“The blunt curve of this tachi is perfect,” you murmur. You set it down and look into his gray eyes. “What do you want?” 

 Nuga smiles. “I have a job for you, Man-Killer.” 

You grit your teeth, and suddenly you feel cold washing all over you and you lose feeling from your face and hands. A shiver runs down your spine.

 “I haven’t heard that name in a while,” you coldly say, letting the ice drip in your words. 

Nuga raises his chin towards you. “I heard you have been out of commission for a while. Some people are looking for you.” He folds his arms. “Though I did not think that you’d be hanging out with Konoha’s echelons.” 

 “It just happened,” you snap.

 Nuga nods. “So, this job–”

 “Sorry, I don’t do that anymore.” You shoot him a dangerous look, your hand itching to draw your own sword. “I’m clean now.” 

“Will the price persuade you?” Nuga asks, stepping closer to you. “You are one of the best–”

 “Enough,” you interrupt Nuga. “Stop it. I am not doing it. Find someone else.”

You make a beeline towards the exit, but Nuga’s words stop you cold. 

“No matter how clean you think you are because you have stopped killing for the money, it does not erase the bodies you have murdered,” Nuga calls after you. “They are forever dead because of you.”

You bow your head slightly and clench your fist. 

“If you change your mind,” Nuga starts as your foot steps forward. “You know where to find me.” 

//

Tobirama watches you as he walks you home. All the jokes and the playful remarks have stopped, replaced by a serious look on your face. He rarely sees you this serious, and he waits for you to divulge your thoughts with him or even get angry and spew some shit to deter your thoughts, but you do none of those. 

 The two of you are reaching your home, and you have not even spared him a glance. 

While he was talking to the master of the blacksmith school, he overheard a little bit of your conversation with one of the blacksmiths there. The word Man-Killer sticks to his mind like a persistent stain, and it makes his stomach turn. He wants you to ask him for help if you are in trouble, or better yet, tell him everything, but how can he ask you that without condemning you? Do his brother and Madara know about this?

 He is not even sure if you took the job or not since he was pulled away at the last minute about prices and delivery of the commissioned weapons. 

Tobirama is a second away from doing what he should do: take you and hold you in a cell to interrogate you. 

 However, he wants to trust in you. He should. The least he can do is to give you the benefit of the doubt. You deserve it. 

You did say that you do not do that anymore and that you are clean.

Tobirama thinks that he is becoming ridiculous. 

 He propagates enough chakra to feel you out. 

 He reaches forward and catches your arm, and you whirl around. He feels that you are upset. 

“Are you okay?” Tobirama asks, hating how vague he is. He is always so straightforward that he does not know how to move away from that extreme. 

“Yes,” you reply coldly. Your voice is too detached. 

 A lie. 

Tobirama searches desperately. How can he ask this? Of all the times he is smart, why is he incapable of saying the right words? 

 You wrestle your arm away from Tobirama, and you stare at him. “Why are you asking?” 

 “Will I see you tomorrow?” 

You regard him cautiously, and Tobirama sees a sliver of you. The one you tried so hard to mask. He is only beginning to scratch the surface and he wants to keep peeling each skin to get to the core. He feels like he is on the tip of something here, like the rush of adrenaline before the success of an experiment. 

Who are you? Tobirama wants to blurt out. He wants to know. He badly wants to know. He has never desired something this bad. 

“Of course,” you tell him, and your eyes move to search his face. 

 You are telling the truth. 

The tension in Tobirama’s shoulders releases, and he watches you walk away from him. His skin itches where he has touched you, and for a moment, he almost follows after you. 

 He stops himself and shakes himself out of it. 

 You are telling the truth. 

The moment you stray, he will be the one to stop you. 

//

You wake up sweaty and feverish. Your mind feels foggy, and you just do not feel right. You feel cold and your head hurts, and the light coming in from your window makes it worse. You let out a long sigh, and relax into your bed. Your limbs feel like there are anchors attached to them, dragging you down to the bottom of the ocean. 

 You give yourself a minute to come to, breathing in and out to brace yourself to move. 

 Then, you count from one to three. 

  One. 

  Two. 

  Three.

Red flashes under your eyelids, and you let out a cry as you attempt to roll out of your bed. You fall to the floor, limbs splayed like a newborn foal. You bite your lower lip to stifle another cry, but your chest begins to heave, and you are unable to control the sob that breaks out of your mouth. You clench your fist, cursing the world. 

 You should have known that your old nick-name would come back and bite you in the ass. You never took pride in it, for you, it was always a job. The people chose to name you that because when you were young and desperate to live, you killed a man who had assaulted you in self-defense and fled. 

 Maybe you should have not fled. Maybe you should have faced the consequences, but back then you were running away from your family. You had no morals, and you only cared for yourself.

Your breath comes out shakily, and you press a hand to your face. 

 More flashes of black and red flashes in your vision, and for a moment, you see vials of medicine surrounding you, all wrongly-labelled. A woman appears above you, pouring poison into your mouth as you fight her with all you have got. You are weak and so small, and she holds you down until all the fight leaves you and she is forcing your mouth open to make you swallow more of the medicine. 

“Drink, sweetheart, it will make you feel better, ” she says. 

  “Mother…” You gasp out weakly, your lungs unable to fully support you. “What...have you done?” Your voice fades into a whisper. 

The woman brushes your hair from your forehead. “I’m making it better. Don’t worry, love, I will keep you safe. You know why?” 

  You stare at her weakly, trying to fight the grogginess from your eyes. 

  “Because I love you the most.” 

You push the flashback from your mind and force yourself up. You hated being sick. 

 You know that this is probably fever from fatigue, but you cannot bear it. It feels like you are young again, and you are helpless and dying. 

 A fever is a fever, but to you, it is a death sentence. A slight sniffle or a light cough is enough to send you panicking.

You let yourself cry, but when it is time to get out and back to work, the traces of your tears are gone and you put up your walls that you have spent so much time making. Nothing will come out. 

//

Tobirama feels relieved when he sees you come in, but you look worse for wear. You do not spare him your words, but that is fine with him. At least you are here. 

 He gives you your share of work for the day, and he does not say anything as you move away from him and take to one of the corners of the library to settle in. 

 Tobirama is great with silences, but he cannot stand yours. 

But he bears it because it seems like it is what you need today. 

When it is time to leave, he finds you asleep in the corner. He does not dare wake you, and he crouches in front of you to study you. His eyes go to the strands of your hair splayed on your sweaty forehead, and the frown etched upon it. He expects you to open your eyes and draw your blade to stab him, but you do neither. 

 He slowly puts the back of his hand on your forehead, and he realizes that you are sick. He studies your chakra, and he finds that it is a lot better than before. Though you are very exhausted to the bone. 

 He sits beside you, debating on what to do next. He knows he cannot leave you here, but he also does not want to alarm you. 

The new clock in the library ticks away loudly, and Tobirama looks to the waning light on the floor. 

 A sudden weight presses against his side and he feels his heart beat pick up as your head rests against his shoulder. 

He does not know what to do. Your weight on him does not bother him that much. 

He glances at you, and finally, he makes up his mind. 

//

“Brother, are you sure you are not pushing her too hard?” Hashirama asks with concern, his voice sounding both far away and near. 

 “Are you serious?” Tobirama defensively retorts. 

You open your eyes to the bickering Senju brothers, and you let out a groan. Their voices make your head throb. 

“Hey!” Hashirama chirps. “Welcome to our humble abode, again!” 

 You are dimly aware of Tobirama assisting you to sit up. “Uh…” You croak out with uncertainty.

“You are sick,” Hashirama announces. “And we’ve done all that we could, but your body is very exhausted. You must rest.”

You bring a hand to your forehead, remembering that you were in the library last time you were awake. 

 “Eat,” Tobirama commands, bringing a bowl of soup into your sights. 

Hashirama looks offended. “Tobirama! Be nice.” 

 You take the bowl of soup from Tobirama’s hands, briefly touching his warm fingers with your cold ones. 

Hashirama sits by the foot of the bed, the mattress dipping from his weight. 

“So,” Hashirama begins. “I took a look at you.” 

 You glance at the Hokage, wary. 

“Tobirama says there is an improvement in your chakra pathways, but last he checked, you were worse off,” Hashirama continues. “I undid some of the damage to make it easier for you, and we will have to do more gradually. I did not want to overwhelm you. With a lot of training along the way, you should be able to use your chakra with ease and be in top shape.”

You glance at the Hokage, feeling like the two Senju brothers have just invaded your space. Nonetheless, you thank Hashirama. 

  “I owe you one, Lord Hokage,” you tell him seriously, like you are taking an oath. 

Tobirama catches this and he frowns.

 Hashirama pats your knee. “Do not worry about it. I am happy to help.” He glances at Tobirama. “Though you should also thank him. He carried you all the way here and insisted that you are to be a priority.”

“Elder brother!” Tobirama scolds indignantly. He looks at you. “I don’t want your thanks. I just did what any other person would do to help someone who does not know self-preservation.” 

 “Tobirama, stop it.” Hashirama glares at his brother. 

You nod glumly, the fog in your mind still there. You stare at the soup and you take the spoon to scoop some. 

“Please take your time and stay here,” Hashirama heeds. “Do not worry too much about the work for the curriculum right now. Focus on your health.” 

You snap up to meet the Hokage’s eyes. “I don’t want to–”

 “Please, I insist,” Hashirama firmly says, squashing any room for questions or rebuttals. 

 You sigh, and you stare at the soup blankly. “Alright,” you give up. 

Tobirama’s eyes are on you, his stare burning through your head. Then, he walks out of there without another word. 

 Hashirama gives you a look of sympathy, and you look away, unable to bear it. 

 “We will see you later.” 

You set your bowl aside when the Hokage has left, and you lie back down. You pull your legs towards your body and close your eyes, willing away whatever is ailing you as if it is that simple. 

//

Tobirama refuses to even let you touch any of the work the next day, even though you did your best to prove to him that you are feeling well. The two of you hurl insults at each other, until Hashirama is coming in to break the two of you up, saying that the two of you are waking his children up so early in the morning. He mitigates by suggesting that you can do some light reading, and by sending Tobirama outside the house for errands. He is the Hokage’s right-hand man, after all. 

 For the most part, Tobirama leaves you alone, except he appears when it is time for you to eat. He stares at you intimidatingly until you finish every last drop and crumb of your food, and when you do, he stares at you some more, like he wants to sock you in the face, or as if staring will have some help to drive away your exhaustion. 

It is getting annoying by the end of the day, so you adamantly ask him to leave you alone. 

 Which he refuses. Stubbornly. 

 “Tobirama, please, I cannot do this right now,” you beg him. 

Tobirama’s jaw flexes. He walks over to you, but then he stops short, his movements twitchy and not at all him. 

 “Give me your arm,” Tobirama commands. 

 You scowl at him. “What now?” 

 “Just give me your arm!”

“Okay, okay!” You raise your arm towards him. 

 His fingers wrap around your wrist, and your eyes widen at the sight. It suddenly feels like your fever is back and you loathe it. 

“Tch,” Tobirama murmurs. “You’re an idiot. Why did you push yourself this hard? Couldn’t you have taken breaks?”

 You snatch your arm away from him, and you stare at your toes. 

Tobirama stares at you some more, and it is honestly creeping you out. What does he want? 

“What?” You snap. 

 Tobirama rolls his eyes. “Shut up and rest.” 

“I am not tired,” you stubbornly reply. “And I do not want to accumulate too much debt from the Senju brothers, so I should go.” 

Irritation flares in Tobirama’s eyes. “Stop it.”

 “Tobirama, give me a break.” 

 “No.” 

You want to scream, as this situation is becoming worse and worse. Tobirama is so overbearing, and it seems like he wants to keep track of everything you do. Your panic over being sick pales in comparison to how he is acting. 

The door opens to reveal Hashirama. 

 “Tobirama,” Hashirama calls, exasperated. “Leave her alone.”

 “Brother,” Tobirama chides, barely sparing his brother a glance. “I am talking to her right now.”

“No, no you are not,” Hashirama walks over to tug Tobirama away from you. “You are bullying her.” 

Hashirama manages to drag him to the threshold. “Why are you acting like this? Get a hold of yourself!” 

Tobirama tugs his arm away from his brother harshly, and he glares at his brother. Then, he glances at you. There is a lot of turmoil manifesting on his face–his lips are pulled into a straight, taut line, his jaw is tense, and his eyes, his red eyes are on fire, like coals burning in a forge. 

 The air tenses and becomes thick, but then he abruptly leaves and the air becomes calm again.

 Hashirama gives you an apologetic look and leaves you alone, and you are plunged into the dark again. 

 //

 Tobirama knows that he is being impossible, and it really is ridiculous, but when it involves you, it agitates him and there is this itch in his throat that he cannot alleviate. He thinks about what you will do next, and he wants to take it up to his brother, but he does not want you to get into further trouble. He would rather fix this himself and do what he needs to do to make sure that you are not a threat. If you are, then this is a matter he will have to take care of himself as well.

 He goes back to the school of blacksmiths and demands for Nuga, and when he gets him alone, he corners and questions him. 

“Talk,” Tobirama demands. 

 Nuga’s gray eyes regard the Hokage's younger brother. “About?”

 “Man-Killer, ” Tobirama grits his teeth. 

Nuga shakes his head and holds out a palm. “Be careful, Lord Tobirama. This is not a can of worms you’d like to open, though everything comes with a price.” 

Tobirama narrows his eyes, fishes out money and slams it on the man’s palm. “Talk, or I will see you in a cell.” 

 “You can’t hold me against my will without proof,” Nuga says. “And I only hold information, nothing criminal.” 

Tobirama keeps his cool and raises an eyebrow expectantly.

“She is an assassin,” Nuga starts. “Though she’s only killed corrupt lords and other rogues, robbers, and the like.”

 “Why is she here?” Tobirama asks.

 Nuga shrugs and smirks at the incoming pun. “Beats me. She says she’s turned over a new leaf.” 

 Tobirama remembers his hand on your wrist and your words. You are telling the truth. 

“Why Man-Killer?” Tobirama inquires. 

 Nuga holds out his palm. 

Tobirama sighs and presses a few more bills. 

Nuga leans forward as if this is some taboo to never be spoken of. “Rumor is, when she was a teenager, she killed a feudal lord’s son, who was a rapist. She has been on the run ever since. The feudal lord has a bounty out for her, but of course, no one wants to mess with a reputation preceding hers. She is quite the fighter, even I desire to someday see her in action.” 

Tobirama has seen her in action, and he believes this man. His head spins from thinking. So many pieces are falling into place and even if they fit, more questions start to arise. 

Nuga shrugs and he turns away. “That is all I can tell you. She seems very sincere about her clean slate though. Back then, I heard that if the price was right, she would do anything. She must have grown some morals.”

Tobirama stares hard at Nuga, and it does not take long until the room is thick with his power. The forge where fire runs hot and wild fizzles into nothing. 

“If you ever speak of this again, I will have your head,” Tobirama threatens. 

 “Of course, I would not want to mess with the people who protect her,” Nuga smiles coldly. “I’ll tell you one thing for free though.” 

Tobirama regards him coolly, squashing the mess that is cooking in his mind.

“If you are so ready to defend her and kill for her, you are way in too deep, Lord Tobirama,” Nuga warns. “She has got you in her palm, and she will crush you. She is not called ningen satsujin-sha for nothing.” 

Tobirama grits his teeth, but he says nothing back. His mind turns to think ahead, but his heart beats in protest. 

 However, he is not the kind of man to take the easy way. There is no such thing, in his life. 

.

.

.