Lately, everything is exhausting.

Is it because there is a global pandemic? That probably doesn’t help.

I have ulcerative colitis (my GI doctor originally thought I had Crohn’s) and one of the biggest change I’ve noticed is that my energy levels are much lower than they were before.

That makes my job as a trainer and instructor very interesting.

When I get asked how my workouts are going, I can’t help but feel a little bit of guilt and shame and even sadness. I love lifting weights but I haven’t been able to move much besides walking my dog.

The thing is, working out takes up most of my energy reserve for the day and I barely have enough to be a functional human being for most of it.

I baked some cookies the other day before work and I wasn’t sure I was going to be able to survive my work day.

I am currently working on finding that balance in my life. I still want to move my body but that will look differently for me and that’s ok.

I didn’t write this post so that you pity me for my situation. I wrote it to raise awareness. Before you judge someone (or a trainer) for the amount of exercise they do or don’t do, remember that everyone’s situation is different. You don’t know if someone is working 12 hour days, has 3 kids at home, is struggling with mental health, has a chronic disease or a combination of all of that.

The #noexcuses rhetoric is damaging. Let’s encourage people to practice self-care in ways that work for them. Not what society expects that self-care to look like.

The shirt you wear when it’s squat day and you just finished six 12 hour nightshifts in 7 days, you’ve had 2 hours of sleep, you’re too nauseous to eat, and you’re STILL a over the top @tamorapierce fan at 29. My workout mantra?

Train like Keladry of Mindelan.

Gets me through a hard lift every 👏🏻 single 👏🏻 time 👏🏻.

Yesterday night was bit tough one for me. I had extreme left arm weakness and mild breathlessness and severe diplopia. I applied eye drops prescribed to me for my eye infection as well as i had my medicines and steroid too. I managed to sleep yesterday night. I thought next morning i won't be able to wake up for my daily excersice. I woke up in the morning still had weakness in my left arm. It was a happy morning there was no breathlessness. I went cycling today but again no availability of cycles. Better luck next time. Me and my friend had a great time playing badminton. Being a sports lover and a player i love playing badminton. We played for 30 mins because it is hard for me to pull more than that. After that we sat there silently listening to chirping of birds looking at other people who were enthusiastically performing pranayam and excercises. We also did pranayam and meditated for 10 mins. I experienced a lot of peace and strength which boosted my energy level.

Hoping to find a cycle tomorrow!

Have a nice day :)