[ID: A playlist named “🌑twyla boogeyman🕸️” with songs including Lotta True Crime (Penelope Scott), creep (mxmtoon), rises the moon (Liana Flores), Bugbear (chloe moriondo), and more in the same vein]

These songs make me think of Twyla, but they are not songs she would listen to. I didn’t understand the playlist was aesthetic at first, I thought it was trying to make one of Twyla’s playlists. These songs ooze Twyla energy. They’re all soft purple like her.

But she wouldn’t listen to these. Well, I can’t speak for her, but I don’t think she would. And here’s why: Twyla’s autistic.

I’m autistic, and I have playlists like this yeah. Genre-specific playlists tend to look like this. But my most played music consists of weird obsession stuff. I have a playlist for sea shanties, modern and old covers. I have a playlist of “alien music” consisting of sounds that don’t really make a beat because it’s just alien core and I like it? My playlist “♾️on loop♾️” is the songs I’m obsessed with at the moment, because I have autism-ed with these.

[ID: A playlist titled “♾️on loop♾️” constructed as follows: Lovefool (Pomplamoose), Choice (Jack Stauber), Choice (Jack Stauber), Choice (Jack Stauber), Rule #4 (Fish in a Birdcage), Rule #4 (Fish in a Birdcage), Rule #4 (Fish in a Birdcage), Coffee (Jack Stauber), Two Time (Jack Stauber), The Devil Went Down to Georgia (Charlie Daniels Band)]

Songs not in image: two more instances of The Devil Went Down to Georgia and one more instance of Two Time.

This is what an autistic playlist looks like. Not necessarily repeating songs, but I find that it’s mostly just songs that make you happy. Not organized or anything. Just vibes.

Now, all autistic people are wildly different. Two people can be complete opposites and still be autistic (this video by Reberra Bonbon on TikTok shows that). So I must say that this is MY PERSONAL EXPERIENCE.

I have found myself masking my playlist names or even songs thinking that someone will say “that’s not real classic rock!” or something like that. I’ve had playlists named “Classic Rock and extra stuff”, “animated movies”, etc instead of more specific genre names because I’m worried of others judging it. I’ve added songs I don’t really like to playlists so people don’t think I’m a poser. But in reality, I just want to throw my favorites together. Who cares if I call Fall Out Boy classic rock and it comes after Duran Duran in my playlist? Who cares if a dreamworks original slips into my Disney songs mix? I don’t, and since nobody else currently uses my playlists, I don’t see why people care.

I just like my songs. I like designing/finding aesthetic cover art and making cool playlist names. I like having U2 immediately followed by Blink-182 and then Jimmy Buffet. Why does it matter that Margaritaville isn’t classic rock? It owned its place on that list in my heart.

Nobody can take any of that away from me. Nobody can take away my playlist with different covers of the exact same song because they all have a different vibe. Nobody can take away my playlist from when I reorganized the Luca OST to be in the right order. Nobody can take away the playlists I made for my DND characters and the songs that define them. Nobody can take away what makes me who I authentically am. They’ve tried. I’ve pushed back harder.

People that are just randoms,for example neighbours or people your mum kinda knows, and they know I have the autisms so when they see me

THEY ALWAYS STROKE MY SHOULDER

WHY IS THIS DONE

My mum told my neighbour about my autisticness and not to worry or be upset when I don’t respond to her words so every time she sees me she makes a sighing noise like “ahhhhh” And stroke my shoulder.

Got dry skin? I mean like DRY skin? Then this little baby might just change your life.

My flaky, peeling nose made a reappearance this winter and I was annoyed because it took a whileeeeeee to fix it last time.

This time around I got the job done much quicker. I drank a ton of water….well really it was 매실차 but it’s better than just drinking coffee as my own source of hydration like I am prone to do. I also turned down my heating so the air isn’t as dry in my room. And for that final boost, I found this little treasure at Olive Young. The price tag was hefty for me at 22,000 won but it had all the right key words (moisture barrier, dry skin, skin revitalizing) and I couldn’t resist. Or I was that desperate. I later found out it was on sale online at 11,000 won TAT oh well~

I spray this in the morning before I start my makeup routine and during the day and my face feels so much better~ My makeup looks much better as well. The one minus is that the scent is …well it’s not bad, it’s just a little odd, but it goes away.