#augustah

Some nights call for red. The dress was the statement. I just showed up. Dress: Geel https://go.shopmy.us/p-62480124

There are moments in life that arrive quietly, without fireworks or fanfare and yet somehow, they feel like the biggest milestones you’ve ever touched. This Chanel bag was one of them. It didn’t come in a dramatic reveal or a glamorous boutique moment with champagne and soft lighting. It came to me in real life: in my apartment, hair wrapped, wearing an oversized t-shirt, standing under the warm glow of a regular lamp. And honestly, that made it feel even more personal. Even more mine. Because this wasn’t about a show. This was about a story. This was about a girl, me, who has spent years growing, hustling, budgeting, dreaming, and becoming. A girl who has whispered “one day” so many times it almost became a part of her vocabulary. A girl who has tried things, failed at things, succeeded at things, gotten back up from things… and kept going anyway. So when I finally unboxed this bag, my first Chanel, it hit me in a way I wasn’t expecting. Not like a purchase, but like a milestone I earned. A bookmark in my story. The minute I lifted it from the dust bag, I gasped. Not exaggerating, an actual gasp. The Puffy Quilted Flap… the cloud-like texture… the aged gold hardware… the weight of the chains.

Hello, 2009 Chanel Coco Cocoon Puffy Flap Bag.

It felt luxurious without trying.

It felt bold without being loud.

It felt like the kind of bag that walks into a room before you do.

And the wildest part?

It looked even better on me than I imagined.

You always think you know what your “first Chanel moment” will feel like, but you don’t, not until it’s on your shoulder, hugging your frame like it was meant to be there all along. When I slipped it on and saw myself in the mirror, I broke into a full, uncontrollable scream-laugh. This bag represents so much more than leather and gold. It represents discipline, patience, sacrifice, creativity, and an undying belief that I’m allowed to have beautiful things. That I’m allowed to step into softness. That I’m allowed to treat myself with the same love I pour into my work. It reminds me of the late nights editing content until my eyes blurred, the early mornings dragging myself to the train for my brand ambassador gigs, castings, the moments I said no to things so I could say a bigger yes to my future, the uncertainty, the faith, the small wins, the big wins, and the quiet in-between. This Chanel isn’t about status it’s about symbolism. It’s about the girl I’ve grown into and the woman I’m becoming.

And I think that’s why it feels so special. Because I didn’t rush into it. I didn’t buy it because it was trending or because everyone else had one.

I waited.

I studied.

I tried on other versions.

I told myself, “When the right one shows up, I’ll know.”

And when it did… I knew.

How I Found My Perfect Chanel (and How You Can Find Yours)

Buying your first Chanel isn’t just shopping, it’s a journey. I am very picky so it’s best to take my time. These bags hold history, craftsmanship, emotion, and investment value. Your first one should feel like a chapter, not an impulse. Here’s everything I learned along the way, for anyone else searching for “the one”:

1. Start with who you are right now — not who you think you need to be.

Chanel isn’t about perfection. It’s about alignment. I used to think my first Chanel “had” to be the Classic Flap because that’s what everyone gets. But the truth? That bag, while stunning, didn’t feel like my current chapter. I’m in my experimental, artistic, elevated-but-unpredictable era. The Puffy Quilted Flap matches the softness I’m leaning into and the edge I naturally have.

Ask yourself:

Does this bag match the version of me I’m stepping into?

If the answer is yes, you’re close.

2. Size matters more than people admit.

As a tall girl 6’1, proportions are everything. Mini bags? Cute in theory, but they disappear on me. A medium Chanel sits nicely, but doesn’t eat the way an oversized one does. The large Puffy Flap drapes on me in the exact right way: bold but effortless, structured but soft. Your perfect Chanel should look like it belongs on your frame, not fighting with it.

3. Seasonal pieces deserve the same love as classics.

The Puffy Flap is a seasonal piece which is why it feels rare. Less common, harder to find, and way more “if you know, you know.” Everyone talks about the Classic Flap, but Chanel’s seasonal pieces have their own magic. They’re expressive. They’re artistic. They tell a different story. If you want something iconic: go Classic. If you want something expressive: explore seasonal. If you want something you: trust the one that pulls you in.

4. Leather type changes the entire personality of a bag.

Lambskin, caviar, calfskin, aged leather, distressed leather. Chanel isn’t one texture fits all. Mine is an ultra-soft lambskin puff buttery, cloud-like, luxurious. But this softness gives the bag life. Movement. Depth. If you want durability: go caviar or calfskin. If you want drama and texture: lambskin and specialty leathers are your friends.

Ask yourself:

Do I want a bag that stays stiff or one that molds with time?

5. Hardware is everything.

Gold isn’t just gold.

Chanel has:

Shiny gold

Aged gold

Matte gold

Ruthenium

Light gold

Champagne gold

The aged gold on my Puffy Flap gives it warmth almost a vintage richness. Shiny gold would’ve made it louder, more formal, less “everyday luxury.” The hardware should match your skin tone, wardrobe, and personal vibe.

6. Be patient! The right Chanel will always find its way to you.

I almost bought the wrong bag three different times. But every time, something felt off.

Too small.

Too stiff.

Too trendy.

Too common.

This one?

It felt right immediately like it had been waiting for me. And I want you to know: Chanel isn’t going anywhere. Your perfect one will appear when it’s meant to. Trust yourself. Trust your timing.

7. Buy the bag that makes your heart drop into your stomach.

Because here’s the truth: When you find your Chanel, your real Chanel, you won’t be calm. You won’t be composed. You won’t be thinking straight. You’ll gasp. You’ll smile. You’ll scream into a mirror. You’ll see yourself differently. That’s when you know.

This bag is so much more than a purchase. It’s a chapter marker. A physical reminder of every step I’ve taken even the ones I stumbled through. It represents the version of me who didn’t give up when it would’ve been easier to. The version who kept creating, kept believing, kept becoming. And now, every time I pick it up, it whispers the same thing back to me: “You earned this.”

When I first started working with brands, I thought the hardest part would be getting noticed. Getting the email. Getting the yes. Getting chosen.

What I didn’t realize then was that the real work begins after the collaboration starts.

Over time, brand work stopped feeling like a milestone and started feeling like a relationship one that’s built on trust, communication, and intention. Some of the most valuable lessons I’ve learned didn’t come from contracts or content calendars, but from simply showing up, again and again, and paying attention to what actually matters.

Consistency matters more than momentum

For a long time, I thought growth looked like big moments viral videos, sudden spikes, quick wins. But brands don’t move that way. They pay attention quietly. They notice how you show up when things are calm, not just when everything is performing well. Consistency in tone, visuals, and values has mattered far more than any single post. It’s what makes your work recognizable. It’s what builds trust over time. And that trust only holds when you’re working with products you genuinely vouch for.

Reliability is part of the creative

Creativity isn’t just about aesthetics. It’s also about being dependable.

Answering emails on time. Delivering when you say you will. Asking questions instead of guessing.

These things aren’t glamorous, but they shape how brands experience working with you. I’ve learned that professionalism doesn’t dull creativity it gives it room to exist. Being reliable has opened more doors for me than trying to be perfect ever did. And when you can’t meet a deadline, communication matters. The brand chose you for a reason. Honesty preserves trust far more than silence ever will.

Presence is felt, not performed

There’s a difference between creating content and being present in it. Brands feel that difference. So do audiences.

The more I stopped trying to “sell” myself and focused on being grounded in what I was creating, the more aligned my work became and the more natural collaborations felt. Presence reads as confidence, even when things aren’t loud or polished. You don’t have to over-explain yourself when your work already speaks. You don’t have to mimic anyone else. You were chosen because of who you are, not who you can imitate.

Not every collaboration is meant to last

Early on, it’s easy to say yes to everything. Over time, I’ve learned the value of discernment.

Some collaborations teach you what you want more of. Others clarify what you don’t. Neither is wasted. Every experience has helped me refine my boundaries, my expectations, and the kind of partnerships I want to build moving forward. Ones that feel mutual, respectful, and aligned with products I would actually use more than once.

Longevity comes from alignment

What I value most now isn’t just being chosen, it’s being trusted. By brands and by my audience. You!

Trust grows when your work feels honest, when your voice stays consistent, and when your approach doesn’t shift depending on who’s watching. The goal was never just to work with brands. It was to build something sustainable, intentional, and reflective of who I am. on and off camera. Looking back, brand work didn’t change me. It clarified me. And that’s the lesson I keep returning to: the more grounded you are in yourself, the more natural everything else becomes.

I started modeling at sixteen.

I didn’t grow up in New York or LA. I was living in Minnesota, working a shift at Marshalls on Christmas Day, a day I wasn’t even supposed to work. Somewhere between working the cash register and counting down the hours, a woman approached me and asked a question that, at the time, felt almost unreal:

“Are you signed? Have you ever thought about modeling?”

The funny thing is—I had.

That question had already found me long before she asked it.

My First Introduction to the Industry

Before that day, I had already dipped my toes into the world of modeling. I attended programs like John Robert Powers, ProScout, and Barbizon. But like many families, mine didn’t have the financial ability to pay thousands of dollars just for access to rooms, opportunities, or promises that weren’t guaranteed. So when that woman approached me at Marshalls, my first instinct was skepticism. I assumed it was a scam. But after doing my research after the fact, I realized the agency was legitimate and that moment became my real entry point into the modeling world. That’s how it started. Not with glamour, but with curiosity, timing, and trusting her and the universe.

New York, for the First Time

After I finished high school, my agency planned meetings for me in New York. It was my first time in the city. My first time traveling alone. My first time being trusted by my parents in that way. We stayed in constant contact the entire trip, but I still remember the feeling of independence, navigating the city on my own, walking into agency offices I had dreamed about, sitting across from people whose approval I believed would shape my future. I met with nearly every agency on my dream list. And one by one, I was told the same things:

“Beautiful girl but not the right fit.”

“We already have someone who looks like you.”

“Come back in a few years.”

Whatever that meant.

When Reality Set In

After New York, I returned to Minnesota.

I continued modeling locally.

I enrolled in college.

I focused on my education.

At the time, it felt like a detour. But in hindsight, it grounded me. I earned my bachelor’s degree in communication with a focus on global business something that would later become more valuable than I could have imagined. After graduating, another opportunity presented itself. A model who had previously been signed with my Minnesota agency was transitioning into scouting and had strong industry connections. She set up meetings for me in Milan. In the end, Boom felt different.

They understood me.

They appreciated my height.

They didn’t try to shrink me.

At six feet tall, I had learned quickly that not every market celebrate height the way people assume. “You should be a model, you’re so tall,” sounds flattering, but internationally, it’s more nuanced. European sizing, proportions, and standards don’t always align with height alone. Boom saw me anyway. I’ve been signed with them for about five years now, and through that representation, I booked meaningful, career-defining work.

The Rejection That Didn’t Stop

Even while signed, I still dreamed of expanding- London, Paris, Germany. But during that period, my look was often overlooked or deemed “not right.” And after a while, the repetition of that feedback becomes heavy. So I stopped chasing validation. I told myself something different:

I know who I am.

I know what I want to build.

And I will become a brand that can’t be overlooked.

Words are power.

The Shift That Changed Everything

For over a decade, I tried to get representation at the highest levels. I followed the rules. I waited for permission. I believed silence meant I wasn’t enough. But at some point, I realized something crucial: Agencies don’t make models. Models make agencies relevant.

So I chose myself.

I networked intentionally.

I collaborated with creatives who shared my vision.

I invested in my portfolio.

I submitted myself for freelance work.

I built relationships directly with brands.

And I created content consistently, authentically, strategically. Social media didn’t replace agencies. It revealed the truth.

Brands care about presence, professionalism, reliability, and clarity. They care about who you are, how you communicate, and whether you understand your value. Eventually, it became clear:

I wasn’t trying to break into the industry anymore. I was already working in it.

Redefining Representation

Here’s the part people rarely say out loud:

Wanting an agency isn’t wrong.

But signing just to feel legitimate can be.

Not every agency is built to support longevity and representation. Some are transactional if you’re booking, you’re valuable; if you’re not, you’re expendable. And that kind of pressure isn’t sustainable. The right agency should feel like a partnership.

One that:

Respects the brand you’ve already built

Understands the clients you want to work with

Aligns with your long-term vision

Supports growth instead of fear

An agency should add clarity, not confusion.

When Alignment Actually Matters

There may come a time when an agency reaches out and if the energy aligns, the vision aligns, and they respect the autonomy you’ve earned, that can be a powerful next step. But signing with a big name just because it looks impressive? That’s not enough. Your intuition matters more than status.

Rejection didn’t push me away from modeling. It pushed me toward ownership. You don’t need an agency to be a model.

But when the right one comes along, it should recognize what you already are.

I know who I am.

I know who I’m becoming.

And I am building something that will never be overlooked.

Traveling for modeling sounds glamorous packing your best outfits, hopping on a plane, daydreaming about bookings, and walking into a city where fashion lives and breathes. And yes, I’ve been fortunate enough to work abroad and book with incredible clients. But here’s what many people don’t realize: modeling overseas is also an investment.

Even when you’re working, the financial return isn’t always immediate. Between flights, rent, transportation, and daily expenses, a trip to Milano can run into the thousands. Some jobs pay off right away, while others take time to show their value.

For example, I worked with Moncler on a campaign one year, and the following year when I was back in Milano, they booked me for their anniversary show. That’s the kind of long-term payoff you can’t always see in the moment, but it comes from showing up, staying connected, and being present in the market.

And this is where perception comes in, Instagram might make it look like every moment abroad is a high-paying gig and luxury living. In reality, there are days I’m hustling between castings, networking, creating content on my own, and making sure I’m maximizing my entire time overseas. It’s not about “living the dream” 24/7—it’s about building it.

That being said, when you’re overseas with downtime between jobs, it’s easy to overthink. So, I’ve learned to keep myself busy, stay inspired, and protect my peace.

Here’s how I do it:

1. Journaling for Clarity

Journaling will always be a good idea, IDC! I use the Five Minute Journal by Intelligent Change. First thing in the morning, I’ll write out my gratitude, frustrations, random thoughts, and even my to-do list for the day. It’s like clearing mental clutter so I can focus on showing up as my best self. In Milano, I’d jot down little wins like finding a great food spot, a client remembering my name, or reconnecting with a friend I hadn’t seen in years. It keeps me grounded and present. Modeling abroad is a big deal so I make sure to stay in the moment.

2. Breathwork When My Mind’s Racing

Traveling for work can be stressful especially when you’re navigating, putting your best foot forward, and making sure you’re on time for castings or shoots. I do the 4-7-8 method: inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 7, exhale for 8. Instant calm. It’s my way of saying, “Girl, you’re fine. You’re here. Breathe.”

If you want help with breathwork, try the Breathing Zone app.

3. A Go-To Playlist for Every Mood

Music changes everything. If I need a confidence boost before a job, I’ll throw on something upbeat and catchy. If I need to wind down, I’ll go for soulful R&B or something vibey. My Milan playlist is a mix of Afrobeats, 90s R&B, and a little bit of Beyoncé and Doechii because sometimes you just need to strut down the street like it’s your runway.

4. Creative Days with No Pressure

Not every day abroad is packed with work and that’s okay. I use those in-between days to my advantage by creating content for my social media. It keeps me visible to potential clients, strengthens relationships with brands I already collaborate with, and brings in income through partnerships while I’m overseas.

Sometimes that means taking my camera, dressing up, grabbing a spritz to-go, and filming in beautiful Milan locations. One of my favorite spots? Parco Sempione with a spritz in hand, people-watching between shots. No pressure, just creativity. And sometimes, those no-pressure days turn into opportunities later on.

5. Boundaries, Boundaries, Boundaries

When you’re surrounded by other models in a competitive market, it’s easy to compare yourself. I’ve learned to take in the inspiration that fuels me and filter out anything that makes me question my worth. Protecting my energy is non-negotiable especially when I’m far from home

Why This Matters?

Modeling abroad is a career investment. Yes, I work and book jobs when I travel, but the real value often comes in the long game expanding your portfolio, meeting the right people, and immersing yourself in a market that challenges and inspires you. I may not always leave Milan with the biggest profit margin, but I always leave richer in connections, experiences, and self-belief. And honestly? That kind of return will carry your career far beyond one trip or one paycheck.