#askmary

-Jo

I’m gonna answer this the best way I can, knowing that I do not have all the information to give a fully faceted opinion. I can imagine how frustrating this situation is for you. Did this happen out of the blue? Were there signs that led up to it? Has this been an issue before?I understand talking has not helped in the past, however I am curious if the reason behind the lack of a physical relationship has been spoken about. I think that if there is an understanding of why, it may make it easier to work through and perhaps wait. What is the response when you do bring it up? Is it anger or defensiveness, is there pain or hurt there? You are doing the right thing respecting her boundaries/space, and there still needs to communication on her end. It may be something that is hard for her to talk about. If she is committed to this relationship (as it seems since you referred to her as fiancee) I would hope she is willing to discuss this. I’m sure you have tried this, but try to broach the subject using “I” statements, “I understand that you want to wait and I respect that. I also feel shut out and hurt when we don’t share or communicate about this matter. I want to support you as much as I can, and I need to feel like we are in this together.” I would also want to know if there is a reason for the 3 months wait. It seems as though there is something specific to give a specified time frame. Again, this is all somewhat speculative, as I do not know your full story.I can understand your concern in regards to this issue. Without communication around it, it can be hard to imagine the situation changing much. I would try to get to the root cause. Maybe she is not interested in a physical relationship. And you also have to ask yourself, if this does not change are you okay with that?If you want to talk this out, feel free to message me. You can continue via anon, or you may message me off anon if you would like to keep it more private. I hope this helped somewhat. I also recommend seeing a couples counselor if this persists and you need a neutral third party to work through it. 

Apart from that, I now can’t wait to finally post everything that I’ve been journalling to my blog. Might seem very mediocre, but I’m a keen procrastinator when it comes to writing, so actually getting to it will be amazing.

“The Hufflepuff Common room at about 3 in the morning.”

Вот начеркала тебе. :з askmary16

5. I look great in red lipstick. Like, sooooo good.

40+ romantic points

December:random fact about me~ The first thing I look at a menu is anything with BBQ. lol BBQ chicken being my main weakness.