#ashufern

Fern had almost gotten used to the flashbacks, had learned to cope as best she could, even if it meant feeling completely numb and like she was having an outer body experience just to continue on with life, instead of freezing up and not being able to live. It’s why she got so confused when she found herself going through the ropes of her dissociation as she liked to call them but she wasn’t really doing things that she normally would. Instead she was numbly searching up her mothers name on facebook, not her mom, the one who had saved her, but the mom who had caused so much pain for her. She looked happy, at least happy enough, and she was married- which only caused more pain for Fern, as the memories of er abuse played through her mind even more vividly. As she continued scrolling, looking through photos, it became clear that her mother had moved on- having another child, another daughter. And at first Fern felt hurt but then her feelings turned to anger and hatred. How dare she bring another child into that house? What if he is abusing this little girl? Chances are he is. Is her mother still doing drugs? Was it too late to do something about her past when there is such a high chance that because she hadn’t spoken out, another helpless child is being put under the same hurt she had? Fern no longer has time to really replay her own abuse, instead thinking of this poor innocent child’s potential abuse. She’s not sure what she can do but she’s hell bent on doing something. It feels like her job as a human, as a sister, as a social worker, and she’ll do anything to get to the bottom of it. Even if it means adding Alexandra Perez on facebook while Fern uses a fake account.