#aprilherman

Herman doesn’t want cats.

Thinks they’re ‘eh’

Until a cat gets into his office and he’s like ????? wtf

He just lets it go do its thing. It’ll leave when it wants, right? It’s not bothering him. 

It usually just vibes and crawls along the bookshelves and meows at him every now and again

Herman deadass talks to it as if it can respond

“alright should i do experiment a or b”

“meow”

“you’re absolutely right, i didn’t even CONSIDER experiment c, thank you”

Cat sits on his documents.

“Cat, you are trying my patience,” he says.

Cat meows.

Doctor stares.

Cat stares.

“Fine, you win.” 

Doctor now has a cat and it’s name is literally just Cat and if you hurt it he’ll actually rip ur face off

Herman has no qualms about giving you a used lollipop. And by that I mean he literally just takes it out of his own mouth and shoves it into yours. Doesn’t care.

His favourite flavour is apple, especially if it’s a bit sour. He loves the zing, despite the fact that it’s almost nothing compared to his usual tingling.

And you know how I said he’ll give you his used lollipops? He’ll take yours too. He gave you one like 5 minutes ago and you’re just chillin’, sucking on it, and he casually pulls it out of your mouth and fucking puts it in his.

Sometimes forgets he has one sticking out of his mouth and tries to talk and ends up dropping it. You just see this look of utter sadness as it bounces off his chest and hits the floor as he tries his best to catch it but just doesn’t have the reflexes for it. 

And then he’ll glance around, see if anyone is looking, and then pick it back up.

But if someone else sees, he won’t. He’ll just deal with the fact he’s lost it. It’s heartbreaking.

You’re in a trial. Herman is having one of his off days. And by off I mean that he’s somehow accidentally overcharged himself and now he’s just this exhausted, fried baby who’s lumbering around Lerys, chillin’. The Entity turns up his voltage during trials but it’s not an exact science and so the extra shocks have just, made him loopy. So it’s a chill trial. Y’all know he isn’t gonna do shit to you. So you’re fixing a generator and this man is just casually leaning against it, laughing. He’s absolutely off his face. He looks high as fuck, a lollipop sticking out of his mouth. You finish the gen. He takes the lollipop, casually presses it to your lips and you have no choice but to open up because although he’s vibin right now, you still don’t wanna risk him getting angry. He puts the lollipop in your mouth, makes you close your lips, pets your head and, “good job.” And then he saunters off.

Herman With a Disobedient S/O

Herman seems to have a sixth sense about when you’re doing something you shouldn’t. 

He has his back to you, sat in his chair and just... Working. He’s deeply focused. He doesn’t even respond when you call his name. So you sneak around behind him, thinkin’ you’re all smart. Herman told you not to touch his medical equipment specifically. You can touch the books and everything else in the office, but if he leaves those tools lying around... Don’t touch. 

Of course, that makes you want to touch them. 

Literally the moment your fingers touch the metal, Herman speaks. “Don’t,” he says. Firm. He doesn’t look at you. You don’t know how he knows. You call his bluff. You pick up a scalpel. You hear him shift. 

Herman looks over the side of his chair. The gear that usually holds his eyes open is relaxed, hanging by his face. He’s giving you a half-lidded, challenging look. “Darling, you’re testing my patience.” 

You don’t back down. You are defiant, after all. Disobedient. 

He gets up. 

You turn your back on him, toying with the scalpel, watching the light catch the glimmer of its surface.

Hands close around your ears, palms flat on the sides of your head. It’s stifling, and you know that he is more than capable of hurting you. Of crushing you. The skull is a fragile thing and Herman Carter’s hands are strong. 

But it’s not the force that would end you. 

You feel static dance around your skull, your hair standing on end. It’s a warning. Your face is tingling as his fingers rub circles into your temples; an action that would normally be soothing, but it’s not right now. 

“Two warnings,” he tells you, a giggle in his voice. Not that there ever isn’t a giggle in his voice. You feel his hands squeeze more tightly. “It’s a good thing I’m forgiving, isn’t it?” He wheezes into your ear. “Now, come, dear. You’ve got some begging to be done.”

me tho

Herman With A Sleepy S/O

Herman very rarely sleeps himself. The voltage running through his body makes any attempt at snoozing almost impossible -- he can be all ready to sleep and then suddenly an extra strong dose of s h o c k will zap through him and he’ll violently twitch awake and think, “ok lmao time to get up i gu ess : )”

And he’s grown used to that. He survives on little sleep. 

But that also means he expects everyone else to as well. 

So sometimes you’ll have dozed off and he’ll be like waKEY WAKEY IT’S TIME TO SCIENCE 

He’s not above shocking you awake. Definitely not. 

Just imagine you’re leaning on a desk and snoozing and this man comes c r e e p i n g behind you with his hands outstretched. You absolutely know he gets a kick out of it. 

But sometimes he does let you sleep. He does understand the human body needs to recover and rest, despite the fact that well, he’s barely even human anymore. Can he still be considered human? Probably not. 

Happy Herman Day!