Jun 21
intro post
about me
hello. call me either FB or Anthony I don’t care actually🤘🏼
im 19, a man, and he him.
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intro post
about me
hello. call me either FB or Anthony I don’t care actually🤘🏼
im 19, a man, and he him.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
So I recently found out that March is Poetry Month? Well I wanted to share something I wrote a while ago...might even do a recording of it being read aloud if I'm feeling brave enough. But anyway here's my poem
Advice to new Significant Others
In the beginning everything feels exaggerated
The passion
The butterflies
The desperation
And the heat
You have to be touching now
I need you now
Hold me close so I don't float away
I want to stay
With you
And not on this porch saying goodbye
You're like an addict wanting another hit
Another injection straight into the heart
So you can feel like your floating on air
But over time you develop your immunities
The exaggeration is gone
Communication is hard
And please stop touching me
I need space
What once was a battle for separation
Becomes an easy parting with no sorrow
Sweet or sour
It just is
The love is still there but now it takes work
There is no clocking out
The pay is always in a state of flux
The benefits are pretty great
Unless you piss off your boss
No, partner
Collaborator
Friend
And sometimes friends fight
Maybe you're too forgetful
Or they're too anal about how the laundry is folded
Or maybe you keep eating their food from the fridge without asking
Or they're too clingy at the worst times
Or you're too sensitive
Or they're too much
You're too much
It's too much
Take a breath
Whew
Love is patient
Love is kind
Love takes communication
Love understands or at least tries to understand
Love apologizes for mistakes
Love holds you when there are tears
And laughs when there is joy
Love is communicating
Love is listening
Not hearing, listening
Love is embarrassing
But you don't mind because
Love doesn't judge or shame
Love is the warmth when your partner says your name
Love is pain when your partner cries
Love is an embrace when you are low
Love is the transformation of a person into a home.
Love is a conversation
And sometimes you stumble on the words
Or get your metaphors mixed up
Or you get frustrated because emotional vulnerability is hard
But your partner understands
They hold your hand
You talk they listen
And understand
If you remember nothing else
Remember
Talk, listen, and understand
i've stopped taking pictures of the sunset
and i've barely looked at the moon
it may sound foolish
but they still remind me of you
Tarot Tidings #1
Deck Used: Pulp Tarot
Greatest Wish: Wheel of Fortune
Extra Magic: Ten of Pentacles
OK so when my heart wishes for something it doesn't do anything small huh? It's no secret that me and my family have been wanting to move for a long time now. Texas sucks with it's weather but also it's political climate. My wish is to spin the wheel and change our circumstances. Be in a place that's more accepting and to have a space where we feel like we belong. And then Ten of Pentacles makes me think that maybe there's a place closer to home than I first realized. Maybe the space that we've created here is what we need right now. We can still save. We can still keep our eyes out but we have what we need right now and that's enough until we can make our plans in the future
i would've stolen the moon for you
i would count all the stars
i would paint a thousand sunsets to reflect how beautiful you are
i would've given you a piece of me, even though there's not much left
and all that i am asking
is that you could just love me
is that you could just hold me like it's only us
maybe then i'd start to feel like i am enough
maybe then i'd start to feel like i'm worthy of love
- lyrics of a song that i'm writing
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
Interpretations in Tarot
So this was something that @battythewitch had mentioned a bit ago and I kind of wanted to expand upon it. For those of you who are new to tarot, or have asked me how to start reading cards, I've always said that you should first to try to learn the "traditional" meanings of the cards but also to have your own meanings as well. This is mostly because sometimes the "traditional" meanings will feel...off. Like, yes, this is what the card means but for some reason or another it just doesn't fit in this reading/spread/etc. And I'll give you an example of just that.
So about a week or so ago I gave myself a reading about whether or not I should reach out to someone that had been pretty awful to me. The cards above are of one of the two choices I was presented with; the classic "should I do this or should I leave well enough alone". This shows the choice of reaching out to this person. Now, " traditional" meanings would say that the cards are telling me that I am being selfish, closing myself off, and hoarding my own time (Four of Pentacles), that I need to remember the past and the good times that were had between the two of us (Six of Cups), that life is full of ups and downs and if things are bad between us now then things are due for an upswing (Wheel of Fortune), and, finally, that we can start over and begin our relationship anew. However, this is not what I saw at all.
I read with a combination off the meanings based on their "traditional" usage, whatever the artist/writer/creator has written down in the deck's LWB/companion book, what the art/colors show, and my own intuition. The first thing I noticed in the Four of Pentacles was the red eyes staring at the person holding desperately on to their coins. The vibe I got was someone who was sneaking through the plains, who had tripped and quickly held their possessions, hoping that they didn't make a sound but, unfortunately alerted the creatures hunting them. The figure in the card felt like prey. The Six of Cups felt more like a regression than remembering the past. Like how when you're around certain people you transform to how you were when you last saw each other. But with some people they regress due to fear or anxiety. The Wheel of Fortune felt like a cycle going on and on, never-ending, a broken record, or an ouroboros which is pretty much the figure in the card. A loop going over and over again with no sign of stopping, a lesson going unheeded. And finally with the Ace of Cups I saw that if I reached out then the cycle would just repeat again starting back at square one.
When it comes to tarot every reader is going to see things differently. It's all a matter of perspective and that's just something we get used to over time. My advice is always trusting your instincts and if your instincts are saying that the "traditional" meanings are more like suggestions rather than fact than by all means come up with your own. As long as you can see and interpret the pattern before you that's all that matters. There is no end all be all when it comes to tarot. New ways are constantly popping up and if something isn't working for you then give another viewpoint a try. Talk, discuss, research, and always have an open and critical mind.
People who hate revising their work just aren’t doing it right.
Just kidding, it’s dreadful. But I’m at least having fun with some of my notes as I go.
Line: And the visions. Mercy, the visions. My note: Don’t curse, Eli. Line: “Eli! There you are!” Eli’s eyebrows arched as he impassively wondered where Vaster had picked up the authority to sic a scolding tone on him. My note: And speak to him on first name basis HOW DARE (As if he had a choice. Eli didn’t even have a last name at this point in the first draft.) Line: Messy hair. A face speckled with scattered freckles. Were those spectacles!? This man, no, this child looked as far from a threat as any, but Eli knew better than to judge by appearances. My note: You just did literally that exact thing don't you ever lie to my face again Line: No, this demon wanted something more. Money, perhaps? But he was a Lord. He would have already had wealth to spare. My note: Oh, sweetie. That’s not at all how rich people work. Line: “Gather the other Hunters,” Eli said, his firm voice cutting into the middle of one of Calton’s panicked pleas. Calton turned to him, his face losing a considerable amount of color. “All of them?” he squeaked. “You’re going to take all of them!?” My note: Eli, the Hunters are literally the entire police force you can’t just take them all away from the city that’s not how anything works.
Finished my first draft!