#amahzinggrace

Because Ella's suggestions are either up or down.

"Um...I'm 16.

"And you're not in college?"

Bayless cleared her throat. "No."

Ah. Perfect. No pretentious asshole kids trying to be like the lucky hipsters on TV. This kid doesn't know what it's like. MANIACAL LAUGH!

Within Liz's mental monologue (around the "maniacal laugh") she accidentally knocked over her coffee. "Blurg," she grumbled before realizing it was empty. "OK, nerd, you're hired. Get me a new cup of coffee."

Bayless smiled, and skipped to the area with coffee. Lounging by the counter were two pages. The one on the left was a girl with short, curly hair and a high voice. The one on the right was a lanky,attractive man with a southern accent, a source of comfort in Bayless' new home. She didn't plan on returning.

"Come on, Kenneth," the girl begged, "one quick bone on the table?" She widened her eyes enough that Bayless would give her a quick bone just to stop the guilt.

The man, showing immense inner strength, turned his head. "Hazel, we have to remain professional. Miss Lemon would have a cow if she saw us in less than pants. I pray she never caught Mr. Jordan and his wife."

Hazel (that's her name?) scoffed. "As if she'd turn them in and look racist." She turned slightly, just enough to catch Bayless' arm. "Who the hell are you?"

"Hell? Sex? Oh dear, things are really going south today." Kenneth sounded distressed.

"Free hugs?" Bayless offered, then saw Hazel's sex-crazed eyes. "Nothing sexual."

Now that's what I like to hear!" Kenneth gave Bayless a bear hug, who secretly melted.

"Oh, Kenneth," Hazel checked the clock, "isn't it time for Jenna's lunch?"

"It is," Kenneth checked. He looked toward Bayless, "you're one of the nicest 1,000,000,000 people I met in my life's!"

Kenneth out of sight, Hazel glared at Bayless. "Listen, you; Kenneth's mine! I don't care about your down-home sensibilities or your perfectly green eyes-

"They're blue."

"-but I have something you don't. I have a fresh condom on me, and no panties under this skirt."

"I wasn't looking for anything," Bayless said, and it was true.

This was exactly when Liz walked in too see what was taking her coffee so damn long. "Hazel, quit harassing the interns."

"It was just hazing," Hazel said, "which is what I call my initiation ceremony. Which is similar to being hazed in fraternity and sorority houses."

"Yeah, well I'm here to..." Liz tried to think of a good pun with her own name, "take this one out of here and protect her from hazing. What if you just watched the training video in the work room?"

8. How many oceans have you swam in? One. When I went to Hawaiii :)

15. What did you dress up as on Halloween when you were eight? I think I may have been a cat. I think.

24. Do you spell the color as grey or gray? Grey.

32. What would your parents have named you if you were the opposite gender? Bayless. It's a family name, so..

43. Where do you buy your jeans? I buy most of my clothes, jeans included, at Maurices.