what if sick reader throws up on clanhead!satoru?
💀omg, lol. this is sending me.
okay i’ll entertain this idea. bc i think it would be interesting to imagine that satoru and reader are already married — they’ve been having troubles with her fertility, and maybe reader’s been nauseous since early that morning. like… every single smell has been making her stomach CHURN — the incense, the pipe smoke, the fancy ass cologne that one of the elders insists on wearing like a goddamn holy relic.
so, her and satoru are sitting through yet another council meeting — elders droning on and on about “duty” and “ensuring a prosperous future” and “legacy,” blahblahblah —and she’s trying SO hard to focus, but she’s pale as death, and the room is tilting sideways. her skin’s clammy, her breathing shallow, and then one of the elders has the fucking audacity to take a hit from his kiseru pipe and blow it right into her face.
ohhhh… her stomach twists. hard.
she lets out a small, strangled sound in the back of her throat, trying to swallow it down — making satoru shift beside her, brows raising in concern, feeling the tension roll off her in waves.
meanwhile hajime drones, “it’s vital that both husband and wife understand the responsibility of continuing their line. if your union is not producing—”
and god, that’s when it hits. it ALL comes up 💀right on the tatami. right onto the hem of satoru’s robes. right in the middle of the council chamber.
satoru’s ENTIRE body goes rigid. frozen. like someone unplugged him from reality. and it is so painfully silent. like, visceral secondhand embarrassment kind of silent. the elders look absolutely HORRIFIED — one of them even drops his pipe — and reader is just sitting there, frozen in shame, tears starting to well up as she tries to process the fact that she just publicly projectile-vomited during a goddamn fertility lecture 😭
then, before an elder can even open their mouth in disgust, satoru is rising, grabbing you gently by the arm and says.
“my wife is unwell. we’ll be excusing ourselves.”
immediate teleportation.
you don’t even have time to process that he called you his wife for the first time outside of the bedroom, because when you rematerialize in the estate, you’re running to the bathroom — sobbing, puking, gasping for air, and satoru is just left standing there in the hallway like:
“what the actual fuck just happened…” 🧍
he’s still got puke on him. it’s in his shoe. and he just kind of… short circuits. for like, a full 45 seconds. then he groans, drags a hand down his face, peels off his outer robe, immediately heading towards the bathroom with a towel and a glass of water, muttering under his breath:
“you should’ve told me you were sick…”
but it’s not even mean. it’s like, weirdly frustrated and soft. like he’s just rattled and flustered and trying really hard not to panic. he crouches next to you while you’re still hovering over the toilet, rubbing your back, and you just sniffle and mumble:
“…my period is a week late.”
cue satoru.exe fully crashing out. LOL. 💀
