The isles were empty and there was only one checkout stand open. As he stacked bags and boxes of fruits and breads into his basket, somehow he felt a welcome feeling. It was as if, for once, he was meant to be there. He had a twisting feeling in his stomach as he shopped. The longer he was there, the more strangely at home he felt.

Turning into another isle later on, he was stopped in his tracks by a tall figure which had topple him over and sent apples and oranges rolling across the tiled floor. The strange man was quickly enough on his hands and knees helping to catch the runaway fruits and save the bread from being spoiled on the dirty, public floor.

Within moments, all of the contents had been returned to the basket. Merlin was helped up and, for the first time, he saw the man’s face, smiling awkwardly down at him. His bright blue eyes met his and for some nauseating reason, he seemed familiar.

“Thank you,” Merlin breathed, barely audible.

“Sorry,” the man said.

“No, it’s fine,” Merlin said. “I’m a clumsy fool sometimes. I’m Merlin.”

The man held out his hand to shake. Merlin reached and, the moment they touched, images and memories flushed before his eyes. He remembered.

“I’m –“

“Arthur,” Merlin said before he could finish.

The man reeled back, the name obviously belonging to him. Eyes glassed over, Merlin realized his mistake and awkwardly looked away. Arthur let out a nervous laugh in hopes to shy away the awkward nerves. Merlin joined in to help, and soon, for unknown reasons, they were both laughing so hard they cried.

Together, having bonded instantly, they went to the checkout stand and each paid for their own small crates of food. The subject of the holidays had slipped into conversation and they found that both of them had little celebration plans, which led them to discover that the two of them had that same otherworldly feeling of not belonging. But that feeling was fading fast for them.

Their conversation dragged as they went out to the parking lot. It was revealed that Merlin had planned to walk home, but Arthur insisted he give him a ride. So, they climbed into his car and silence took them over.

Tension filled the vehicle as they drove. The only sound was the windshield wipers rubbing against the glass as it brushed away the heavy snowfall. Breaking the thick, deafening silence, Arthur offered, “Want to go get a drink?”

Merlin looked at his friend and replied, “Yes.” Each moment he was with him, the more he remembered, the more real it felt.

They tried every bar in town, jumping in and out of the car only to find that each and every place was closed for the season. So, what other solution would they have come to other than to buy a six pack at the liquor store?

Having no place to actually drink, Arthur drove his car down to the lake, frozen over from the cold weather. Arthur climbed out and rested up against the back of the car, and there they sat, talking and drinking, and letting the time drag on.

The memories came slowly to Merlin now. He knew Arthur. He missed him. He found great difficulty in carrying on with this bland, normal conversation knowing that Arthur might just be feeling the same thing.

“Do you know me?” Merlin asked, cutting Arthur off.

Arthur thought for a moment, seemingly debating how to answer. “No,” he said.

“Then why?”

“Why what?”

“Why drive me home? Why buy me a drink?” Merlin questioned. “And why here?” He gestured out to the lake, a lone, crumbled isle set in the center.

Arthur swallowed.

“Already we act like we know each other and we’ve just met today,” Merlin continued. “But, somehow I think maybe we didn’t. I feel like . . . Do you know me?”

Arthur looked at the ground and slowly shifted his position, chunks of snow sliding down and off the car. “I don’t expect you would understand why if I told you,” Arthur said with a laugh.

Merlin bowed his head after dousing the rest of his drink. He wiped his nose as he sniffled in the cold. Then, without warning, he took his bottle and threw it out onto the ice. It made a loud, booming sound as hit the bitter surface of the lake, cracking the ice before it skid out away from them. Arthur just watched Merlin, a clump of guilt forming in his throat when he saw tears form in his eyes.

“You’re seeing it too?” Arthur questioned.

Merlin looked back at him, biting his lip. He stifled his tears before croaking out, “Yes.”

“They’re real aren’t they?” Arthur asked.

“Yes.”

“I’m sorry,” Arthur breathed, looking away from Merlin and out to the lake.

Merlin’s lip quivered and his hands shook. “What are we supposed to do? Why now? Why are we back here?”

“I don’t know.”

“Well we have to do something!”

“I can’t,” Arthur said.

Merlin stopped, his heart beating like a rabbit. “Why not?”

“I have a life, Merlin. I can’t just leave that behind.”

Merlin was breathing heavily and his nose, ears, and lips were red from the chill. “But you left me! You left me for this! I know how you’ve felt every minute of every day since you’ve been back because I’ve felt it too. Don’t you feel like we belong right now? Doesn’t it feel better than whatever life you’ve been living before?”

“Yes.”

“Then why? Why not just stay . . . with me? Stay so we can figure this out, find out why we’re back!”

“Because I have people who care about me, Merlin. I can’t do that to them.”

Merlin choked on his words. “You have a family, don’t you?”

Arthur nodded, tears beginning to push against the back of his eyes now.

Merlin backed away and kicked at the snow, letting out a short, frustrated cry.

“Hey! Hey!” Arthur called, dropping his drink and wrapping his arms around Merlin. “It’s alright. We’ll figure this out!”

Merlin fell to his knees, pulling Arthur down with him as he curled up in the snow. He held on tight to Arthur’s arms, not wanting him to ever leave again.

Eventually, Arthur got Merlin back to the car and they said their goodbyes. “Don’t worry, Merlin,” he said. “I’ll see you again, alright?”

Merlin nodded, tears still fresh on his face. Arthur closed the car door and started the engine. But, before he drove away, he rolled down his window and pulled Merlin in, kissing him on the forehead. “I’ll be back when you need me,” he said.