#aloc

Due to the intensity of the embarrassment you still felt about that little incident almost a week ago, you’d been doing your absolute best to avoid your attractive neighbour, if only for a little while. You weren’t doing too poorly, if you were being honest with yourself, you’d managed to avoid him thus far without problem, effectively preserving your dignity yet another day. You were embarrassed at the action, at the fact you’d up and kissed poor Seokjin on the cheek like that out of nowhere, but you were also confused as to why you’d done it. You weren’t someone to do things so impulsively and on a whim, and hadn’t had the thought or impulse to kiss him on the cheek in the first place. Despite this, the second you’d laid eyes on him, you’d acted without hesitation or room for thought—the helplessness of it, the lack of control, was what frazzled you so. Therefore, until you could sort out that particular cocktail of emotion, you were going to avoid him.

As was the case with most things though, this avoidance couldn’t last forever and was soon to come to an end.

The end in question came one Friday evening when you rushed up the concrete stairs into the apartment lobby, making a mad dash for the packed elevator before it closed and left you to wait for fifteen minutes. Usually there wasn’t much traffic through the elevators, but it was around the time that each working man and woman came home, and so the small compartment was crammed full of people in suits and dress clothes.

“Hold the door please!” you called across the space, hoping you didn’t sound as desperate as you really were, while you scuttled over. You didn’t get to see who you were squishing against as you effectively threw yourself inside, hands holding your bag close to you in a poor attempt to make yourself as compact as possible and reduce how much space you were taking up. There was an annoyed groan from someone in the corner as the doors shut behind you and you leaned around the person in front of you to shoot a bright smile in that direction, ignoring how their attitude annoyed you. “Thank you so much for waiting!”

With that you leaned back, taking an involuntary sniff through your nose as you did. To your surprise, instead of the usual musty aroma of dust, body odour and fresh sweat that was so familiar to the elevator, it was the soft tinge of brine and something floral that brushed your nostrils. You blinked, turning to face the person in front of you, who you were essentially pressed chest-to-chest with. All at once the blood drained from your face then flushed back in to colour your cheeks what was no doubt an alarming shade of embarrassment exclusive only to you.

Seokjin’s lips were tugged into an amused smile, eyes creasing at the ends in his mirth, and you very much wished for the floor of the elevator to open up so you could drop down the shaft and escape this humiliation.

“Oh, hello Seokjin,” your voice was small and you could hear the fluster riddling your tone. “I didn’t see you there. I hope your day has gone well?”

The male managed to nod down at you before the elevator jostled slightly, jerking a little as it came to a stop. There was shuffling from the back as the doors opened and you realised with dread what was about to happen.

“Hi, sorry, excuse me—” it was a woman in her mid-forties that squeezed in behind you, disregarding the fact that there was absolutely no room for her. You squeaked as her entry meant you were now properly pushed up against Seokjin’s front, your bag clamped to your side. You felt the movement of his chest against your own as he inhaled sharply, a shuddering breath, and you were sure your face couldn’t get any more flushed as the elevator jostled into movement once more and had you rubbing against him. This was it, this was how you were going to die—of embarrassment, like you always thought.

There was a plastic-like rustling and crinkling by your shoulder and you turned your head slightly to see plastic and cellophane, wrapped neatly around a large bouquet of spring blooms, the bundle assortment of colours that found their home in the sky at sunset. You were sure more than one of the flowers in there could match the colour currently staining your cheeks.

books read in 2016 - 2017: a list of cages by robin roe