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How I Stay Sane in a Critical World

Photo by: Steven Meisel "You talk to them on the phone. You deal with them on shoots. You meet them at parties. You read their blogs. You visit their sites. You see them on TV interviews. They are the critical fashionistas who you will see pointing to some poor girls new skirt while exclaiming: "Ohhhh, that's just so last season's hemline!!!" as they roll their eyes and cluck their tongues. You want to despise them but you find yourself sounding just like them in no short time! Why?? Because we're in the fashion industry, kids, and that's what we are exposed to on a daily basis!"

I've sat in on a few castings in my day. And I'm still embarrassed to admit that it can be a shark frenzying experience. Knee fat. Eye fat. Back fat. Elbow fat. There's so many places fat can be found when you are a fashionista and you're looking at a model and/or her book. I've seen editors rip up model's comp cards in front of them as they point to the door and yelled: "NEXT!!!" I saw an art director take hold of a model's hand and show them how their fingernails were shaped weird and it threw off her whole hand's visual experience. I've watched fashion editors just shake their heads at a model while saying, "oh honey, pleeeeeease! I hope you haven't quit your day job!" I heard a model booker suggest to one of her young model's to get plastic surgery on her toes to shorten them.

And I've been guilty of it myself. Until about 3 years ago and then something happened to me that was so unnerving that I have ended my trashy, eye rolling BS. I had a young model approach me about doing some testing for her book. She was 6 0 and probably weighed about 130 pounds. She looked healthy. She looked great, actually. She wanted to do a test doing some body stuff, you know, swimsuits, suggestive nudity, backlit, silhouette shots. I had this idea in mind and thought it would work out great for both of us. And then those fatal words just came rolling off my tongue; "It'd be great if you lost a few pounds for it". She looked crestfallen, her head bowed and she nodded, saying she had been feeling fat and wanted to lose some weight. She left, I left and I didn't think much about it. And then 3 weeks later I ran into her at a fashion show. This 6 0 model had to have dropped at least 20 pounds since that ill-fated day I told her to lose some weight! She came running up to me, excited as hell and twirled around showing me how she took "my advice" and lost weight! I was mortified. I was honestly ashamed of myself. She looked like an Auschwitz victim. Her hip bones actually made a clicking sound when she walked. Her collar bone looked like you could cut yourself on it. Her eyes were sunken back, her hair was limp, her skin was broken out. She obviously had either gotten her results from drugs or starving herself, or both. And it was then that I realized that I have a responsibility to these girls, to these models and I had better watch what I say and how I say it from now on.

Photo by: Steven Meisel

Look, it can become a petty world when everything is based on looks. And I am still confronted with this every day. I get about 10 to 20 emails a week from hopeful models asking me for advice about how to get into modeling. They ask me to look at their pictures and to give them an honest critique. Some of the girls are easy to write back. They have potential and I give them some good advice. But there are some that just don't have any potential at all. I literally have to get up from my computer sometimes and walk away. I talk to my husband, tell him about the email, play with my dog, distract myself somehow and then come back and sit down, ready to write to them. So what do I say to these girls who just don't have what it takes? What I do now is thank them for writing to me and tell them they are attractive women! I then remind them of the strict age and height requirements in the fashion industry and if they don't meet those requirements, maybe they could look into the possibility of doing commercial print work if they still want to pursue it. I leave it impersonal but not necessarily cold. I'm nice but I don't leave it too open. I feel bad for these girls. I don't want to be the bearer of bad news or dash anyone's dreams to the ground. I'm also not for lying or misleading anyone either. It's a tough call and I honestly don't like this part of the job.

But there is a way to be diplomatic and responsible and avoid just being a complete jerk. I used to be much more of a jerk. One girl fainted while I was shooting her for a beauty campaign. When she came to, I asked her if I could buy her a sandwich?? It was my cocky version of Marie Antoinette's "Let them eat cake". It is irresponsible to be such a bitch. These girls are so needy of approval and attention and while it can be annoying, it's really our job not to berate any one or cause anyone any deeper self esteem issues.

I don't take myself so seriously anymore. And I don't take fashion so seriously either. We're NOT trying to save the world, one dress at a time. We are image makers, we supply the world with beauty and escape. And hopefully we can sell that beauty to the world. Our kindness towards the models and others in the fashion business goes a helluva lot farther than our catty sides. I recognize that I am not the Queen of Be All, End All advice. I offer only my own advice. I urge potential models to seek advice from other photographers. I am careful with my words now. I keep the cynicism off my tongue and abide by my mother's rule of if I can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all. And yes, I admit it, I have found myself often with my teeth biting my tongue and my lips pursed together with a Cheshire Cat grin on my face. Because the tendency to be critical is so ALLOWED and CONDONED in our industry that I know I could get away with being catty and cynical. But now, I simply do not want to hurt any one's feelings or turn anyone into an anorexic. I have finally realized the responsibility I have with working with the vulnerable people out there who are being judged SIMPLY on WHAT they LOOK like.

"A Look at the World's Top Fashion Image Makers"

Okay! Enough about painting and art exhibits! Let's get back to fashion photography! I've compiled a list of my favorite fashion photographers who's work generally always catches my attention. I am particularly taken with the strength that these photographers possess over two very important things: lighting and capturing the clothes on the models. They are not in any particular order except for the first one; I'd have to say Javier Vallhonrat is my favorite out of all of them. So who catches your attention? I'd like to know which fashion photographers my readers follow and why!

1. Javier Vallhonrat His use of color and ligh is extraordinary. I believe he captures sensuality like no other. And his use of the environment with the model is timeless. 2. Ruven Afandor I think this is one fashion photographer who totally loves fashion. And completely understands how to shoot it. 3. Glen Luchford Another very strong fashion shooter. His choice of models and his lighting are impeccable. 4. Steven Meisel Of course! His work is explosive and emotive and probably the closest thing to Helmut Newton's style that we have today. 5. Solve Sundsbo The way this guy captures movement and emotion mixed with the garments on the models is insane! I've been following his work for awhile. He keeps getting more amazing! 6. Vincent Peters I love the raw sensuality of his work. He seems to pull very real erotic qualities from the models. 7. Enrique Badulescu While the link to his portfolio doesn't show his best work, in my opinion, he has overall captured my attention over the years because of his innate sense of light and his command of capturing the model and the clothing in it! 8. Ellen Von Unwerth Her ability to capture erotic but fashionable scenarios is without question. She has complete control of her shoots and one can tell that her models enjoy working with her, probably because she herself is one sexy woman! 9. Peter Lindbergh He's just phenomenal, what can I say?? His use of black and white and the theatrical sets is masterful! He totally understands a woman's sensuality. 10. Steven Klein Okay, maybe he comes closer to Helmut Newton than Meisel. His spread with Madonna in W a few years back made me take notice of him and keep my eye on his work.

This list is of photographers who are working today. They are at the top of their profession. They are by no means, though, the few that inspired me in the beginning. That list would include Helmut Newton, Chris von Wagenheim, Guy Bourdin, Dominique Isserman, David Bailey, Sarah Moon, and Nick Knight. These photographers are Gods to me! Their work still holds me in awe. Just researching them for this post, I was moved, again, by their images

Should you or shouldn’t you go

When young photographers are starting out and beginning to learn the technical craft of photography, there seems to be a lot of confusion on whether or not photography college is the right choice. I get a ton of emails asking me whether or not I think it’s important to go to college and/or to get a degree in photography. And honestly it’s one of those questions only you can answer. Everybody is different and everyone learns in their own way. For some people, college is an important, integral part of their growing process and really want to participate in that kind of schooling process. Others are more self-motivated and learn better by doing. Experience is their best teacher and they flourish without the restraints of a school environment, all aspects of it including peer pressure and social mine fields. I can tell you about my experience and you can use that insight to help determine your own destiny but I, in no means whatsoever, would ever assume I know what’s best for you. So while I’m eager and happy to share my story, I suggest asking a lot of different people their opinion and do your research. One person’s perspective is not enough when you’re really on the fence about something this important and life changing. I was 17 when I decided to become a professional fashion photographer. While I had the inspiration and the vision and the ideas, I had a very tough time mastering the technical aspect of photography. So in other words, I had the concepts, I just didn’t know how to execute them technically to see the results. And I was probably weakest in lighting. Composition and angles, I was pretty good at as well exposure and depth of field. I got that stuff fairly easily on my own by reading books and experimenting. But lighting!! That was a killer. I put together a portfolio in high school and got accepted into Otis/Parsons in Los Angeles for my first year of college. I was really eager to learn how to light and then I was pretty much going to go out and conquer the world, or so I thought. I had a father that was willing to pay for Art College. If you don’t have financial help and you’re going to have to take out loans or work part time to put yourself through school, that’s something to consider. Because the work load is going to be tough and holding down a job that can support you is going to be even tougher. And student loans are a bitch to pay off. So that’s one thing to really take into consideration when considering photography college. In my family, education and college were very important. My father went to USC and he was very proud of his Alma Mater. So he was willing to pay for me to get a college education and a diploma. In saying this, let me assure you, that these things have never held importance to me. ( I told you, I was always the rebel kid). But I knew for myself, that the discipline of school and the fact that I HAD to show up and I HAD to participate was going to be the catalyst to me learning the craft. I am not a very disciplined person. I needed the pressure of keeping a GPA and I needed the stimulation and competition from my peers to improve and challenge myself to work harder and thus proving results by doing good work. So after my first year at Otis/Parsons, I got accepted into The Art Center College of Design. Now this was back in 1984 when the school was tough to get into and even tougher to stay in. It was not only very expensive, even back then, but it had a grueling work load. I mean, the school opened at 7 AM and closed its gates at 11PM, I think, and I honestly was in school that many hours, 6 days a week, during my first year there. I had no social life, I had to break up with a boyfriend about half way through my first term, I never saw or hung out with friends outside of my classmates, I was busy!! But I’ll tell you something: I learned. And I learned a lot. Especially about lighting.

Art Center Campus

But I can also tell you, that first year of lighting classes were not about lighting beautiful models. I was lighting toasters and wine glasses and shiny metal objects and occasionally my classmates. I carried 7 classes my first term and we had an assignment due every week from every class. If the assignment was rejected on the critique wall then we had to re-do that assignment, plus get the new assignment in by the following week. It was daunting. We worked hard at Art Center back in those days. I’m not sure how difficult it is now. I’ve heard that they aren’t as tough in the admissions process. Back then, it took me 3 tries to get in. My work was deemed too “avant-garde” and they wanted me to take some night classes in lighting to get accepted. I did what it took to get in there because I knew that I lacked the technical skills to master my concepts and I would learn those skills at Art Center. I also have to say that back in those days, there were only a handful of good photography colleges to choose from. There was Brooks Institute, RISD (Rhode Island School of Design), Pratt and Parsons. Nowadays, with the digital explosion and everyone including half of their family wanting to be a photographer, there are photography colleges everywhere! I mean, I’m blown away at how many photography colleges and schools there are out there. I mean, how do you choose? Do you want a degree? Do you just want some basic classes to hone your skills? Do you need a degree? Is it important to actually go to school?

“At the end of the day, your images in your portfolio are what get you the job, not your diploma.”

Okay, so here’s the low down. While Art Center is a very prestigious school and I’m grateful to my father for footing that extravagant bill (he spent around $100K and that was between 1984-1987). Yeah, a truckload of money. You got that right. But no one has ever asked me to produce that diploma that made my father so proud! I’ve been asked if I went to school, but no one has asked for proof of my diploma. Did I become a better photographer because I went to school? Well, yes. I did. Did Art Center prepare me for the “Real World” out here? No, it didn’t. Nothing does but cold, hard experience. If I had it to do over again, would I go? My first question would be, who’s paying? If I had to pay that kind of money to put myself through photography school, I couldn’t go. In my early twenties, which is when I attended, I didn’t have that kind of money and with the workload, it would’ve been impossible to work and go to school. So my short answer to anyone asking whether or not they should go to college is:

Can you afford it?

Can you live and eat while going to school?

Are you going to be taking out massive loans to put yourself through college?

My last question would be, How important is getting a diploma?

Like I said earlier, my father wanted me to get a diploma because education was important to him. But if you’re serious about becoming a professional photographer, having a diploma doesn’t amount to much. At the end of the day, your images in your portfolio are what get you the job, not your diploma. If you need the discipline of school to learn, then school would be a good option. If you’re motivated to go out and experiment and learn on your own, you don’t need school. I would recommend to anyone who’s just starting out to assist a pro photographer and learn from them. You can pick up lighting set ups and learn technical skills right there on the job AND you’re earning money instead of paying someone to teach you. At the very least, intern for someone and work part time so you can learn from a pro and then your part time job can support you while you’re learning. Another great way to learn where you don’t have to spend the money for a degree is workshops. It’s a small investment and you can learn from the pros. It doesn’t have to necessarily be fashion oriented either. You can learn lighting and exposure through a lot of the weekend or even week-long workshops being offered world wide these days. DVD’s and tutorials are another great way to learn. Blogs, the internet, websites, there are literally thousands of them out there giving great tips and advice on lighting and technical knowledge.

“Nothing beats learning through experience…”